“I’ll kill him, I swear I’ll kill him…” Isaac. I sighed silently, listening into the darkness that surrounded me. “How could he do this to us? God, that kid! I’ve never been so humiliated. That’s it!” I heard Mom, in her soft, gentle voice, speaking. “Isaac, honestly, be reasonable here. This isn’t the end of the world. We’ll fix this, darling.” Taylor spoke now. “What about the fans? They’re really, really disappointed in him. I don’t know…I don’t know what this could do to us, you know?” I rolled onto my side, holding my stomach. “Taylor’s right. It will kill us. Our careers are over. Why the hell would he do this to us?” He was shouting now. I held my breath. Isaac didn’t have a temper. He was a gentle person, usually. Still, I couldn’t take my mind off of the bloody ocean.
“Zac! Where are you? Get out here!” I had to get out. I didn’t know how, but I had to. I couldn’t breathe anymore. I felt too overwhelmed for words.
I slowly opened the curtain and climbed down, only to come face to face with my older brother. His eyes burned with rage. He shook his head at me. “I don’t know what to say to you,” Isaac began, placing his hands on his hips. “What the hell do you think you’re doing? How could you do this to us? We’re a band, for Pete’s sake! You can’t just walk off stage whenever you feel like it. This isn’t some game, Zac! What part of that didn’t you understand when we decided to do another tour?” I kept my eyes locked with his, firmly, but not speaking.
Just then, Taylor pushed passed him. “Zac, we need to sit down and have a long talk.” I glared up at Isaac, who turned and stomped away, over to where Mom was. My bother and I watched from a distance as she brought him outside to give us time to talk. Taylor turned back to me. I sighed. “I know. I know, Tay, I screwed up. Bad. I get it, okay? I’m not an idiot. I don’t need another lecture.” I tried to leave, but he put his hand on my shoulder and pushed me to the floor. He had never tried to hurt me before. I stared up at him, shocked.
“Zac, save it, okay? I don’t care about that. I don’t care. I just want to know what the hell is wrong with you.” I shrugged. “Wrong? Nothing’s wrong with me. I just felt like leaving. I dunno. It’s over. Move on with your life. Stop reading into everything.” He laughed. Probably just for the purpose of making me angry. I climbed to my feet. “Reading into something? I’m not reading into anything, Zac. Something happened. You’ve been performing your entire life, and you’ve never left onstage. It isn’t even like you to leave. Something really bad happened up there, Zac. You’d better tell me.” I shook my head.
“Shut up. Nothing happened, nothing’s wrong. You don’t know me enough to know what’s like me and what isn’t. I don’t have to tell you anything. You can’t tell me what to do anymore.” He sighed. “How can you deny this? Something is seriously wrong. And I do know you. I’m your brother. You can’t keep hiding from me. I know you too well.” I turned and began to walk away. I don’t know why I even tried to get away. I knew he would come right back at me. I closed my eyes as I felt him shaking me, hard, angry. “Zac! Stop doing this to yourself, will you? Something happened. Quit lying. I saw it. Stop being the rock you think you have to be and become my brother again, will you?” For some reason, that set me off. I ran my hand through my hair, and turned slowly to face him. “Your brother? Am I really? I thought I was nothing but your freaking bandmate. Your drummer. Since when did you people accept me as being part of your perfect family again?” He shook his head at me. “Zac, you know that’s not fair.” I walked away. “Nothing’s fair, is it? Nothing. Live with it, brother.” I left him standing there, speechless, not knowing what else he could say. I climbed back into my bunk, wincing as I heard him slam the door. I was alone again. I stared down the hallway, illuminated by the neon light from the sunset. I somehow managed to fall asleep then, without even really thinking about what I would be faced with tomorrow.
