Behind Blue Eyes
By Silk
Part 5
Birkoff stood in the
doorway of the White Room, his entire body tense. He had memories of the time he
was sent there, memories so terrible, so indelible, he might never get over
them. Still, he came. His feelings for Michael, never voiced, clawed their way
from the depths of his being and into his throat, choking him.
Michael sensed his presence,
but never took his eyes off the man he was interrogating. "What is it,
Birkoff?"
"Michael..."
he began, eyeing the threshold of the room anxiously. He couldn't bring himself
to enter the room. "Operations wants a report on what you've got so far."
"I'm not done
here."
At the risk of sounding
insubordinate, Birkoff promptly contradicted Michael. "Yes, you are.
Operations said-"
"I heard you the
first time, Birkoff," Michael snapped. Birkoff blinked. He was accustomed
to Michael's terseness, even his apparent moodiness. It was all part and parcel
of the dark knight's persona. But Michael never became personally involved.
Never. His bittersweet chocolate eyes studied the man in the chair. So this was
the exception to Michael's rule. Shit.
Birkoff resisted the
urge to protest, But you never look at me that way! How can you waste all this
time on someone who doesn't want you? I want you. I...it's more than that. It's
always been more than that. Birkoff's emotions were painfully visible, written
across a sensitive face that probably deserved better, but would never find it.
Blair's smoky blue eyes
met Birkoff's for an instant. Birkoff jerked back a half-step from the contact,
seeing kindness, compassion, even empathy, in the eyes of a prisoner. How could
a stranger see what he so carefully hid inside himself? What he never revealed
to anyone, not even the man he...no, he didn't dare think that way.
Slowly Birkoff backed
away, deciding to let Michael take the consequences of his actions. It wasn't
up to him to interfere. But it would kill him if Michael failed. If Operations
sent Michael to Abeyance. Or worse, if he finally acted on his fervent desire
to cancel him.
"Are you still
here, Birkoff?" There was an underlying edge to Michael's voice that Birkoff
rarely, if ever, heard.
"What do you want
me to...tell him?" Birkoff couldn't believe he'd asked that. He wished the
words back into his mouth, but it was no use.
Michael glanced at
Birkoff curiously, as if he were weighing some unseen option. He moved closer
to the younger man, his hand reaching out as if he would touch Birkoff's cheek,
a gesture that would be as familiar as it would be out of character. His hand
abruptly dropped to Birkoff's right shoulder, settling for an avuncular pat.
His eyes more gray than green now, Michael unconsciously rubbed his thumb
against Birkoff's shoulder as he spoke. It was all Birkoff could do not to
shudder and melt into that body. "Birkoff...it won't reflect badly on you.
There's no need to worry."
"It's not me I'm
worried about," Birkoff blurted out, his face flushing dark red.
Michael gave Birkoff a
crooked half-smile that Blair would have sworn would never cross the older
man's lips. "I'll be okay." Birkoff took that to mean that Michael
thought his only interest in him was protective. Relieved that Michael still
seemed in the dark about his feelings for him, Birkoff nodded slightly and
left.
***
"So...you want to
continue your research? Let us set you up in a state-of-the-art lab. Wouldn't
that be your dream come true?"
It would be if you had
asked me before the whole dissertation fiasco, yeah. Talk about timing. But
now, you're asking me to help you set a trap for Jim.
"All I have to do
is give you Jim, huh?"
Michael nodded.
"Well, he's not mine
to give." Blair blushed at the unbidden desire that welled up in him. I
wish he was mine, but I certainly wouldn't trade his life for my own.
State-of-the-art, my ass. Captivity is captivity, no matter how nice the cage
looks.
"You're being very
altruistic, Mr. Sandburg," Michael purred in that low sensual voice of
his.
"Hardly,"
Blair snorted. "If you really want to know, I'm being goddamned selfish. I
need Jim to survive. If that means he has to do it without me, so be it."
Michael made a moue of
disappointment. "Such a sacrifice. And so unnecessary. You could always be
together. Here."
"Jim will never
come for me." He prayed he was telling the truth. Once he'd been convinced
that he no longer mattered to Jim, but somehow, the effort, the lengths to
which Section was going, cast doubt into his mind. And his heart.
"I think he will.
But let's make sure that he does."
Michael bent to unfasten
the manacles that restrained Blair's legs. Producing a pair of handcuffs, he
quickly released Blair from the arm restraints as well, snapping the cuffs over
his wrists.
Michael stared deeply
into Blair's face, his eyes no longer dispassionate and cool. "There's a
bond between you two. He will come. If he thinks that someone else is
interested in possessing what he already considers to be his."
"I told you. He
doesn't have those kinds of feelings for me."
"Too bad. But he
will sense that his Guide is in danger...and he will respond. Won't he? Even if
he doesn't care?"
Blair clasped his
manacled hands together in front of him and stared at the floor.
"Yeah," he whispered, almost inaudibly.
Michael moved so
rapidly, Blair never saw it coming. He claimed the younger man's mouth in a
kiss, his hands threading through all those silky brown curls. Nudging his mouth
open under his, Michael plundered the treasure within, his tongue sweeping
inside.
"You are so
beautiful," Michael whispered against Blair's mouth.
Blair felt helpless
against such a sensual onslaught, but he couldn't prevent himself from
responding. An inarticulate noise escaping him, Blair nuzzled the mouth that
bedeviled him.
Unable to tell if
Michael truly desired him, or if this was just another in a series of
manipulations, Blair sighed Jim's name. In his heart, there would always be
Jim.
Michael drew back, quite
breathless himself. "Ellison must be a fool."
"What?"
"To not take
something this beautiful when it's offered?"
Blair started to shake
his head. "I-I never said I told him, man. Just that he doesn't feel the
same way."
"How do you
know?"
"I just do, man.
Okay?"
"I meant...how do
you know that he doesn't know how you feel?" Michael traced a path along
Blair's cheek with his tongue, making the younger man groan.
"Well, look at me.
I mean, the man'd have to be totally asleep at the switch to miss how I
feel."
Michael smiled.
"Then let's wake him up."