by Mandy and Mica

Okay... where were we?

Chapter 2?  What the nyar?  Ummm..okay you do that.

Shut up brain... anyway, i forget where we are, so here we go.

Splinter was eating a big piece of cheese cause he likes to eat the cheese. And that's what he does cuz like he's a rat and stuff.  Little pieces of cheese stuck to his whiskers.  Ewwwww...gross.

"Umm.. splinter.. uhh..." Leonardo said. He handed Splinter a Wet Nap. "You got cheese on your face."

"Don't you think I know that?"  said the little horny chinese guy who came out of Splinter's nose.

"Ack!" said Leo, and he left the wet nap with Splinter and wandered off muttering about needing to ask Mike what the hell he was putting on those pizzas

Splinter shrugged and use his finger to shove the boogie-man back up into his rat nostrils. He opened the wet nap and a wet nap monster came out.

"I AM MOIST TOILETTE!!" cried the monster.

"Ewwwwww" Mike said.

"No, No." the monster said "toilette, not toilet." the monster was french, and from france. It was upset about the movie Rugrats in paris. It didn't like Kimmy. "I do not like Kimmy! She is booger-faced little yellow diaper girl! She is baby demon!"

"What are we supposed to do about it?" Raph asked meanly because that is what he does cause he is the mean one and stuff.

Venus came up with a perfectly feasable solution to the problem, but she disappeared in a poof of whipped cream because she does not exist anymore.

"Mmmmm...this Venus whipped creme would make a good topping for a pizza."  said Mike.

Raphael threw a liquor bottle at Mike.  "Don't you ever say that name again."  Raph said moodly and then he disappeared in a poof of something unmentionable because the parents got angry at raph for throwing stuff.

"Ooohhh..something naughty to put on the pizza."  said Mike.

It was at this time that Donatello walked in with his new invention, the clean-machine (which was actually just a sink, but who cares) "Ah ha!" He said "I have invented something to make YOU Mr. Moist toilette, OBSELETE!" Then he laughed a evil laugh.

The monster screamed and sank into the ceiling just to be different, saying "CURSE YOU AND YOUR HORNILY EVIL SMARTNESS AND STUFF MISTER DON THE TELLO!"

"Don the tello...I mean..Donatello..go to you room and wash your mouth out.  There will be no evil laughing in my house."  said Master Splinter.

"Awww, but splinty!" Don whined "I killed the monster!"

"I do not care. Do not call me Splinty. You are evil. Go, to the un-evilling chamber now or I'll make you crossover with the power rangers again!"

They all screamed and Donatello quickly ran to the un-evilling chamber.

"Rowr" said the horny little guy hanging from Splinter's whiskers.

"Did I say that you could talk?"  Splinter said as he grabbed him and squashed him on the floor with his tail.  Guts flew everywhere and it was cool!

The guy pulled himself together and regrouped like that dude in MIB and it was cooler! He whimpered and crawled back in splinter's nose.

"Damn boogers (sp?).  They never want to behave."  Splinter said as he lit a fire and was about to put it in his mouth to smoke the lil twerp out.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhh......"  Splinter said with smoke coming out of his ears.

Mondo was in the Living Room fixing his skateboard when he realized that he's dead.  He collapsed on the floor and died.  Well not really since he is already dead.  Vernon came in and started stomping on his tail. He woke up and said "HEY MAN! STOP STOMPIN ON MAH TAIL! oh yea, and one last thing before I die again.. I DON'T wanna go to Minnesota!"

"Well I don't even want to be in this fic.  I was supposed to be on a date with the hunkiest guy."  Irma said dreamily.

Raphael comes up behind Irma with a pick ax for no reason.  He had a horny look on his face as he chopped off his own dick.

HEY HEY! NO HENTAI!! ok.. jeez, fine brain, get all pissy.. umm.. hmmm... he chopped off hmm.. IRMAS DICK.. wait.. that's not right... hmmm... he chopped off Irma's Ponytail.. good. :)

"HEY!" Irma slapped him "Put that back!"

"Umm.. ok" Raph said and he duct taped it back on.

"That's better!"  said Klunk.

"I am the Rat King hear me Squeak!"  said the Rat King because if he didn't say that then he wouldn't be the Rat King now would he?

"Squeak!!"  said the Rat King proudly as he walked out the door.

"Would ANYONE like to kiss my buutterfly?" Aska asked, as this story was insane and she was allowed to be in it.

Leo screamed in girlish horror, which kind of made sense (for reasons we won't mention, but...)

"I would!" Klunk said. Then he ate Killer (one of Aska's butterflies) and Aska got mad and turned him into a cat with butterfly wings.

"Aww! I wanted to be a bullet with butterfly pants!"

"Pants?? pants?? Where are you getting crazy ideas like that, Klunk? You won't even meow like a normal cat anymore."  Mike said as he shook the cat a little.

"Your a naughty kitty."

"Excuse me??? Doesn't anybody want to look at my butt!!?"  Aska whines.

"No," Splinter says "for I am an old Rat who does not partake in those types of pleasures. But, would you like some cheese with that whine?"

"Sure" Aska says, and they sit down and eat some cheese together.

"Now that we're sharing..." Splinter opens up his kimono and everybody screams.  Aska does an unmentionable act and Splinter squeaks in pain.

Then the brain steps in again and changes the scene. Everyone ends up in the TurtleVan, which is rather crowded since it's just a VW. But, then Donatello opens the extra-demensional space that all cartoon characters posess and everyone has enough room.

"Chinese fire drill!!"  Venus yells. She disappears, thus answering the question about what happens if somebody disappears in a chinese fire drill.  They just disappear and nobody cares or notices.

Then they hit a butterfly and Aska cries. "It's Okay" Splinter says wisely because he's like all wise and stuff. "All creatures must die."

"That's right!" Aska hollors, and she takes out a meat hammer and pounds Splinter into meat Sushi in a Kimono.

"Blahhhh.." said Vernon.  "Nobody likes sushi."

Aska looks at Vernon and stuffs the sushi down his throat and down his pants. She says "Gil-Bert!" He dies happily.

Donatello pulls over the van.  "There will be none of that in MY van!!"

"Who says it's your van?"  said Leo

"I do" said Aska vouching for Donatello.

"Who asked you?" Klunk said, flapping his wings in Aska's face.

"Bzzzzz! It's MY van!!!" Baxter stockman said.

Aska screamed "AAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! A GIANT FLY! BUTTERFLIES ATTACK!"

Leonardo and Raphael watch cause they like that kind of stuff.

"Oh...ewwww..what are they doing?" said Leo.

"I think...they're porning.."  said Raph.

"I did not want to hear about that."  said Cyborg Don.

"STOP IT MY BUTTERFLIES!!!!"  screamed Aska.

The van ran into a tree and everybody died except everybody that was in the van.

"Well that's gonna be a pain that's gonna linger." said Raph

An invisible force drew them back to the lair. Then One of the lair's walls fell down and crushed Raphael. Don happily fixed it, smiling and whistling like the happy repairman he is.

"Oh why did you have to fix me?" asked Splinter.

"Cuz the rat king keeps complaining aobut his daughters." said Don.

Baxter and his flies were flown away by Aska's butterflies.

"I'm saving you for later."  Aska said as she evilly left.

"Helllooo!!! I'm crushed here!" Raph growled from under the bricks. Mike put duct tape on his mouth.

"I know Raph...you loved Aska's butt, but life goes on."  said Leo while he was playing around with his pointy thingies.

Mike made a grossed out face. "I thought Aska took that away from you, Leo?"

"Shut up Mike." Leo said.

Mikey shrugged.

Suddenly the wet nap monster reappeared. "BWHAHAHAHAHAHA! DON THE TELLO! YOU HAVE NOT DEFEATED ME! I CAN FIT IN YOUR PURSE AND A SINK-LIKE INVENTION CANNOT! YOU ARE DOOOOOOMED I TELL YOU, DOOMED!! YOU *AND* YOUR RUGRATS IN PARIS!"

"Aww, darn" Don said as he tried to put his invention in his purse and realized that it did NOT fit. At this point, the person and her brain fought over whether Donnie had a purse, but we'll let YOU guys decide for yourselves. (DOES TOO!!)

A quick internet poll was taken while you were reading this fic and it was decided..RIGHTFULLY that Don does not have a purse. Another poll was taken in the mall and at a pizza place and it was decided that don DID have a purse, so NYAH! (does not!)

"I April O'Neil has a purse."  said April as she swung her purse around. Then she saw the monster. Then she screamed her special April O'neil scream.

"I Got it!" Danny pennington jumped up, holding a talkboy (tm) "I got her scream! I'll make bazillions!" He ran off.

"HEY!" the monster said "I *MADE* her scream! I get some of those bazillions!" He ran after Danny.  Danny ran away screaming like a little girl.

Leo was turned on by that scream. He ran after the Monster and Danny too.

Vern Thomson saw a news oppurtunity in this and held a screaming and running olympics for April to report from.

At this point, the fic disapeared for a few millenia and everybody died.
 

End of Chapter 2?

On to Chapter 7
(You really don't need to read any of those other chaps cause it's really the same thing.)

Back to Chapter 1....there was a chapter 1...well no just thought there might be