All of my heart I do
Blood though my veins for you
You alone have all of me."
~ Lyrics by David J Matthews
Keely's six week recovery was difficult for everyone involved. She hated not being allowed to do things for herself and quarrels with JC were not uncommon. Setting up the foundation with Melissa had only added to Keely's stress level. The support from the fans was phenomenal and The Johanna M Alden Foundation for Women with Cancer was doing exceedingly well. JC could only wish that his relationship with Keely was the same. The chemo made Keely irritable and after a brutal word war with her, JC asked Justin if he could stay with him. Justin knew how much the two missed each other, but it would take a lot for everything to be forgiven. Keely had said a few things she didn't mean, but she didn't know how to begin to make up for them. Her days were spent with Rose and Justin while JC helped Vikki in the studio.
"I've lost him, haven't I, Baby J? He's gone to stay with you and I can't find a way to tell him how sorry I am."
"Come here, sweetheart," Justin said opening his arms.
"I'm going to shed all over you, Justin."
"Don't you worry about that, okay? And you haven't lost him at all. You're both going though a lot and needed time to think alone."
"He used to love playing with my hair, Justin. Now it's all falling out..."
"I have an idea if you trust me, Keely."
"Enough, JC! Enough, okay? I can't watch you do this anymore," Vikki said stomping out of the recording booth.
"I want you to move your ass out of Justin's apartment and go home to her."
"Vikki..."
"I know you were hurt by what she said, but do you honestly think she meant it??"
"She told me I should have let her die that night outside the hospital!"
"She'd already be gone if those were her true feelings. Go to her, J. You two need to be together."
"I'll go find Dexter so you can at least finish the song." JC grabbed his keys, jacket and scarf and headed back to the loft.
"It shouldn't have taken Vikki yelling at me to go back to the loft," he thought as he weaved his way through traffic. JC didn't know whether to feel upset or relieved when he parked next to Justin's car in the basement garage. He was definitely happy to hear laughter when he opened the door.
"You two could be twins now."
"Only if I were taller, Rose. I still can't believe he made that kind of sacrifice for..." Keely stopped mid sentence when she noticed JC standing a few feet away.
"Check it out, Keely, we can even wear matching bandanas in public if you want. C...hey man..." Justin said walking into the room.
"I decided to get rid of the curls and Keely felt bad for me. So she let Rose do her hair like mine."
"You still look better than he does, Star."
"Hey Rose, I'm free if you still want to get those groceries."
"The hair must be quite a shock," Keely said falling into a chair after they left.
"I've missed you, Star. I've missed us."
"I've been horrible, J, and even though it would hurt like hell and take a while, I'd understand if you wanted your ring back. The truth is though that I'm not ready to part with it just yet." She was staring at her hands and playing with the ring.
"I'm hoping that if I give you time, you'll forgive me and we can go back to a normal relationship."
"Do you know what I did to keep you somewhat with me these past three weeks? I had Tiny go out and buy every Dave Matthews cd I knew you had, just to see why you liked the group so much. I don't know about you, but it's the lyrics that pull me in every time. Out of all the beautiful lines he's written that remind me of you, one bridge gets me every time I listen to it."
"Which one would that be," she whispered.
"I think the world of you. All of my heart I do. Blood through my veins for you. You alone have all of me. From you my strength is full. To carry your burdens too. I give my word to you." She was crying again, but she didn't care.
"You want to know which song comes in a very close second?" JC walked over to the stereo and put in a cd. He pressed play and walked back to stand in front of Keely, asking her to dance.
***************
You cannot quit me so quickly
There's no hope in you for me
No corner you could squeeze me
But I got all the time for you, love
The Space Between
The tears we cry
Is the laughter keeps us coming back for more
The Space Between
The wicked lies we tell
And hope to keep safe from the pain
But will I hold you again?
These fickle, fuddled words confuse me
Like 'Will it rain today?'
Waste the hours with talking, talking
These twisted games we're playing
We're strange allies
With warring hearts
What wild-eyed beast you be
The Space Between
The wicked lies we tell
And hope to keep safe from the pain
Will I hold you again?
Will I hold...
Look at us spinning out in
The madness of a roller coaster
You know you went off like a devil
In a church in the middle of a crowded room
All we can do, my love
Is hope we don't take this ship down
The Space Between
Where you're smiling high
Is where you'll find me if I get to go
The Space Between
The bullets in our firefight
Is where I'll be hiding, waiting for you
The rain that falls
Splash in your heart
Ran like sadness down the window into...
The Space Between
Our wicked lies
Is where we hope to keep safe from pain
Take my hand
'Cause we're walking out of here
Oh, right out of here
Love is all we need here
The Space Between
What's wrong and right
Is where you'll find me hiding, waiting for you
The Space Between
Your heart and mine
Is the space we'll fill with time
The Space Between...
***************
They were quiet as the music filtered over them.
"I don't want to be at war anymore, Keely. You need to let me help you, sometimes."
"Kiss me, Josh. Not as if I'm going to break though. Kiss me the way you did before all this started."
"I don't know if I'll be able to stop after one kiss, Star."
"Then don't...just show me you love me. Let me show you how much I really do love you."
"Justin and Rose are going to be worried if the door is locked when they get back."
"Tape a note to the door, I don't care. I just know I need you right now." JC scrawled a note, placed it on the door and then picked Keely up to carry her to their room. She shivered and he could feel the tremor roll through her body.
"Star, you're shaking. Is something wrong?"
"I'm just nervous, Josh."
"Don't be, Star." He set her on her feet, kissing her softly...sensually, running his hands down her arms and intertwining their fingers.
***************
Spring sweet rhythm dance in my head
Slip into my lover's hands
Kiss me won't you kiss me now
And sleep I would inside your mouth
Don't be us to shy
Knowing it's no big surprise
That I will wait for you
I will wait for no one but you
***************
Both were caught up in the moment as JC began to lift Keely's shirt, only to feel her body tense.
"Maybe this wasn't such a good idea, Josh."
"Trust me, love. Just trust me." He peeled the shirt from her body and knelt down in front of her. Keely bit her lip as she watched JC trace his fingers over the scar left on her body. She almost began to cry when he left a trail of kisses over it.
"I told you never to worry about not being beautiful, Star. I don't want anyone else but you."
***************
Look please lover lay down
Spend this time with me
Together share this smile
Lover lay down
Walk with me, walk with you
Hold my hand your hands
So much we have dreamed
And you were so much younger
Hard to explain that we are stronger
***************
He drew in a sharp breath as Keely flicked her tongue over the hollow at the base of his throat. Her hands slipped into the back pockets of his jeans, pulling him closer to her body.
***************
A million reasons life to deny
Let's toss them away
See you and me we
Lay down look see
She and he
By my lover's side
Together share this smile
Each other's tears to cry
Together share this smile
Lover lay down
***************
As they were trying to catch their breath in the aftermath, JC felt a wetness on his shoulder.
"I'm sorry, Josh. I'm so sorry for everything I said."
"Marry me, Star. Tomorrow works great for me." In that moment she knew everything was forgiven.
"I love you, J."
***************
Oh please look please lover lay down
Oh please lover lay down
And you weep
Lover lay down
Cause it's over
Lover lay down
Say love say love say love say love say love
Could I love you
Could you love me
Darling it's all the same
And we dance away
***************
****All Lyrics used are property of David J Matthews and all songs are performed by the Dave Matthews Band. Songs used include "The Space Between" "Lover Lay Down" and parts of "Rapunzel"...for more lyrics or to check out the DMB, visit the official site at http://www.dmband.com****
Back to Chapter Index
Back to the Den