The
death of a loved one represents a major turning point in our lives.
No matter how prepared, we are usually caught off guard by the many intense
and confusing feelings that accompany the grief following the death of
a loved one.
The pain and
suffering of bereavement is always heightened during holiday times.
Therefore, as Christians prepare to celebrate Easter, we are reminded of
the joy of Christ's resurrection, the season of spring, renewal and rebirth,
and of the expectations for happiness and family togetherness.
However, a
person grieving the death of a loved one often feels emotionally out of
place during a holiday. Their inner feelings do not match the expectations
for joy and happiness that a holiday season brings. Therefore these
expectations can heighten a grieving person's sense of loneliness, isolation,
loss and pain.
~COPING AND
CHRISTIANITY~
Others who have
struggled with these feelings have told me that they have found comfort
in their belief system even when questioning their own faith. I can't
tell you how many grieving people have said that if it weren't for their
faith, they don't know how they would have coped. They have found
comfort in the message of Easter. Through Christ's suffering, came
resurrection and redemption for all mankind.
Jesus was no
stranger to grief. He grieved deeply at the death of His good friend
Lazarus, and the passion in the garden of Gethsemane was about Jesus griving
His future as He felt abandonment, ailenation and isolation. As we
reflect our suffering, we may be reminded of how Jesus' mother, Mary, must
have grieved as she watched helplessly while her only son was crucified,
died and buried.
When we feel
angry with God and ask, "How can a benevolent God allow such pain?" we
can remember that God understands and forgives our anger. In the
midst of Christ's agony on the cross, He too asked, "My God, my God, why
have you forsaken me?"
If in the midst
of our suffering we find our faith wavering or are angry at God, we can
bring our anger to our prayers. Even in anger, we can try to maintain
a dialogue with God. The real lapse of faith is not in anger but
in indifference. When we find ourselves struggling with issues of
faith, we can talk to a clergy person who understands the grieving process.
Remember too
that there are others who understand our pain. This might be a good
time to join a support group. There may be no better salve for a
spirit wounded by grief than to listen and share with others who understand.
It is also true that in sharing our own pain we may help someone else to
feel less alone.
It may be that
Christ's crucifixion, death and resurrection represent the most powerful
bereavement theme of all time; the personal growth, self awareness and
a reordering of life's priorities can come through the pain and suffering
of grief.
May we let
the message of Easter teach us that even in our suffering on earth we can
find forgiveness and reconciliation in our hearts. Because in forgiveness
lies the renewal, rebirth, and resurrection of the spirit.
Printed
with permission from
Bereavement
Magazine, 5125 N Union Blvd, Colorado Springs, Colorado 80918
March/April
1995
(888)
60-4HOPE (4673)
E-Mail
grief@bereavement.com
~THE
HARD QUESTION~
|
~THE
UPSIDE OF SORROW~
|
GRIEF
SUPPORT INFORMATION
PAGE INDEX
|
