On
this Mother's Day, as we who have lost a child, remember our children.....there
are some things also I think we should think about and that is our own
mother's too.
My mom is gone.
I lost her 20 years ago from cancer. But I always remember my life
with her, as a child and as an adult. I never forget what she taught
me, and what she gave me.
She taught
me wisdom, survival, honesty, integrity, but most of all, she taught me
how to go on no matter how bad life deals us things.
I once never
really thought about how my son's death affected her. I was so wrapped
up in my own pain, I couldn't see hers. Just before she died, she
told me she wished she could live longer, and see my son graduate, marry
and make ME a grandma. I told her I wished for those things too.
But they never happened.
I wish I had
my mom here today. I wish I could pick up the phone and say "Mom,
how do you make those rolls that me and dad used to sneak down in the middle
of the night and eat?" Or "Mom, I hurt, help me." But I can't.
But I CAN live by what she taught me. I can be strong because she
taught me to be. I can give to others because she taught me to.
I can survive because she told me I would. And I can hurt because
she's my mom and I love her.
For those of
you who have your mom's alive still on this Mother's Day........reach out
a little extra this year. Give your mom an extra hug. I wish
I could mine.
Never feel
shy to say, "Mom, I love you." For we all know how precious those
words can be to us. What WE would give to hear our child tell us
that one more time.
I have a picture
of my mom holding me when I was 6 weeks old. The way she looks at
me in the photo.....well, .......I know how much she loved me. I
have one more picture, the last one taken of her, where she is holding
my son. I look at it and I know.........how much she loved him.
And this I
wanted to share, because it always makes me smile.
When Andy
was 5, just weeks before his death, I needed to go to the mall. Mom
offered to watch him while I went.
Now, when
I was growing up, candy was not allowed in our home very much. It
was bad for our teeth mom used to say. So, I did the same thing when
Andy was growing up. Candy was a treat, a rare treat.
I got home
from the mall that day and did not see Andy in the house. I asked
mom where he was and she hesitated and said, "I don't know." I said,
"What do you mean you don't know?" She wouldn't look me in the eye.
I heard this noise softly coming from the living room. I still didn't
SEE him but I could HEAR him. I followed the soft noise, which was
coming from behind the couch. I peeked over and there was Andy sitting
with a DINNER PLATE filled with sliced apples, peach slices, bananas
and CANDY.
Mom was right
behind me and said, "Now don't you go hassling him." I asked her
what was with the candy as I saw different kinds of candy on the plate......and
she said, "Hey, he's my only grandchild, and I'm his grandma, I can give
him candy sometimes."
And I asked
her how come I didn't get candy like that when I was a kid. She told
me that's why, I was her kid, not her grandkid. LOL And Andy
LOVED going to grandma's. Yeah, I can see why now. They tried
to TRICK me!
~SHARON~
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PLEASE VISIT
SHARON'S WEB SITES
~IN
MEMORY OF ANDREW FRANK DUNBAR~
~AN
ANGEL'S PATH TO HIS MOTHER'S HEART~
~ANGELS
REMEMBERED~
~TANNEHILL
SWEET SHOP~
"IN GOD'S HANDS"
~ANDREW
FRANK DUNBAR~
~GOD'S LITTLEST
ANGELS MEMORIAL SECTION~
~A
TRIBUTE TO ANDY~
~ON THE WINGS
OF ANGELS MEMORIAL SECTION~
~MEMORIES~
|
~FREEDOM~
|
~CIRCLE OF
LIFE~
~Elton John~
