The realization fought it's way, slowly
through to the thickness of my mind
which had been too clouded
by beautiful memories to face
the truthfulness of today.
It was the yesterdays we shared
so much closeness, laughter and contentment.
Endless months of tenderness and love
I'd taken for granted would continue.
In a million ways you tried to tell me,
through actions, lies.
Everything but the truth;
that somewhere, sometime,
it all stopped happening for you.
Out of bitterness we parted, for awhile,
then time allowed my mind to deceive
itself into believing there might be
something to salvage
and you welcomed me with tenderness.
Or, was it ego? A shadow of love
does not have arms to embrace you,
to make you feel wanted and secure.
It only blocks out the warmth.
In order, I think, not to hurt me
you've been carrying on a facade
with false laughter and careless loving,
only to hurt me more.
I'm sorry it's taken me so long
to come to this realization.
It must have caused you great anxiety
not knowing if I'd ever see through you
or whether you would, eventually,
have to be honest.
