Pickup Lines

That shirt looks very becoming on you....of course if I were on you I'd be coming too.

If I said you had a nice body, would you hold it against me...Please??!!

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.

Are your legs tired? Because you've been running through my mind all day.

Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see!

That dress looks nice....Of course, it'd look even better crumpled up in the corner of my room.

Are you lost ma'am? Because heaven's a long way from here.

Pardon me, is there a mirror in your pocket? Because I keep seeing myself in your pants.

Hey baby, wanna sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up!?

Would you like to have breakfast tomorrow? Should I nudge you or call you?

(Check female's shirt tag)....Just as I thought, made in heaven!

Were your parents Greek gods? Because it takes two gods to make a goddess.

Pardon me miss, I seem to have lost my phone number, could I borrow yours?

Nice to meet you, I'm (your name) and you are...gorgeous!

Your name is Sandra, huh? Can I call you Sandy? Really, what time?

Were you in Boy Scouts? Because you sure have tied my heart in a knot.

Have you seen (any movie)? Would you like to?

My face is leaving in 10 minutes... are you gonna be on it or not?

Screw me if I'm wrong, but isn't your name Gretchen?

Do you have any Italian in you? Would you like some?

If I gave you a sexy negligee, would there be anything in it for me?

I'm new in town, could I get directions to your place?

Miss, if you've lost your virginity, could I have the box it came in?

Hi, the voices in my head told me to come talk to you!

Do you sleep on your front? Do you mind if I do?

If you and I were squirrels, could I bust a nut in your hole?

Do you know the essential difference between sex and conversation? No, huh...So you want to go somewhere and talk?

That's a nice shirt...could I talk you out of it?

(Female at the copy machine) Reproducing, eh? Mind if I help?

Hey baby, you want to see something swell?

Hi, I'm conducting a feel test to see how many women here have pierced nipples....

Are you religious? Cause I'm the answer to all your prayers!

I love every bone in your body...especially mine.

(With hands on shoulders) Oh, those are shoulder blades, I thought they were wings.

Are you O.K.? Because heaven's a long fall from here.

You know, I never was to good at math...like if I put you and I together, I'd get 69.

You have pretty eyeballs. Of course they'd be better if they were eyeing my pretty balls.

You know the more I drink, the prettier you get!

Was it love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

You're good at math right? Is 69 a perfect square?

Was your father a farmer? Because you sure have grown some nice melons!

Your face or mine?

Hey, here's the word for the day: legs. Whatdya say we go upstairs and spread the word?!

Am I dead, Angel? Cause this must be heaven!

Hey Baby! I'd like to wrap your legs around my head and wear you like a feed bag!

Is there an airport nearby or is that just my heart taking off?

Make a calling card that says.....Smile if you want to sleep with me! Then watch your victim try to hold back her smile.

Hi, my name's (_____), how do you like me so far?

Why don't you sit on my lap and we'll get things straight between the two of us.

Hey baby! Wanna go get some pizza and screw? What you don't like pizza?

She: (to passing man) Do you have the time? Him: Do you have the energy?

Bond. James Bond.

You know, I'd really love to screw your brains out, but it appears someone has already beat me to it.

You look like the type of girl who has heard every line in the book. So, what's one more?

Her: What do you think of this (dress, sweater, blouse, etc.) Him: I like nothing better.

Walk up to a lady at a social gathering (party, club, etc.) and simply ask, "are you ready to go home now?"

You know, I'd give you a piece of my mind, but I've got more of something else.

At the dinner table, if you eat together, pick up the bread and ask, "Wanna roll?"

You know, you've got the prettiest teeth I've ever dreamed of coming across.

Think you can dance in those shoes?

OK, you can stand next to me as long as you don't talk about the heat.

Ask girl if she likes jewellery. Then grab your nuts and say, "Then suck this, it's a gem!"

You're 'No Parking' right? Just trying to guess your sign.

Why don't you surprise your room-mate/parents and not go home tonight?

Good looking waitress pouring a drink: Say when! Guy: As soon as I finish this drink.

Lie down. I think I love you.

What's a nice girl like you doing with a face like that?

I can sense that you're a terrific lover, and it intimidates me a little.

If I weren't so romantic, I'd shoot you.

My lenses turn dark in the sunshine of your love.

My friend and I have a bet that you won't take off you blouse in a public place.

Can you believe that just a few hours ago we'd never even been to bed together?

I know a great way to burn off the calories from that pastry you just ate.

Was your father a mechanic? Then how did you get such a finely tuned body?

Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears? (Pull your pockets inside out....) Would you like to?

You know I really am James Bond's body double.

Stand back, I'm a doctor! You go get an ambulance and I'll loosen her clothes.

If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.

I think I could fall madly in bed with you.

You: Tickle your ass with a feather? Her: What?! You: I said 'Particular nice weather?'!

Hey baby, wanna play train conductor? OK. You sit on my face and I'll Chew, chew, chew! (choo!)

Hey baby, wanna play lion? OK. You go kneel right there and I'll throw you my meat.

Do you know the difference between my penis and a chicken leg? No??? Well, let's go on a picnic and find out!

Oh, you're a bird watcher....(Whip out your unit and ask) Well, would you take this for a swallow?

Stand back, I'm a police officer! You go call for backup and I'll frisk her!

Do you have a library card? Good, caus1. That shirt looks very becoming on you....of course if I were on you I'd be coming too.