Steve-a-mania Hits ECW

In ECW in late 1995, the Public Enemy and the Gangstas were in the middle of a hot feud. However, one week it turned out downright funny as Steve Austin entered ECW.

(Joey Styles is up in the broadcast booth. He puts his headset on and listens.)

Joey Styles: All right, we've got a problem... we've got a problem in the locker room invloving Public Enemy, 2 Cold Scorpio and New Jack of the Gangstas. Let's go down to the locker room.

(In the locker room, the camera is on New Jack.)

New Jack: Hold on, man. Get that goddamn camera outta my face!

(He swings at the camera man and transmission is lost. We go back to Joey Styles at the booth.)

Styles: We've got a camera down, but... we've got a fan cam! Go to fan cam in the locker room!

(The camera is on Johnny Grunge, who is standing next to Johnny Grunge.)

Johnny Grunge: You talking to me, punk?

(He lashes out and hits the fan cam, and transmission is lost again. We go back to Styles at the booth.)

Styles: We've got no cameras, but we... we've got one? We've got one... grab... Charlie, grab your camera. Come with me, we're going right to the locker room.

(He puts down his headset and leaves. Down in the locker room, Joey goes through the door to reveal Grunge and New Jack arguing while Rocco Rock and 2 Cold Scorpio look on. Several men pull them apart, and force Public Enemy out the door. The camera switches to Joey Styles, but there's a blond man in yellow posing in the background.)

Styles: We don't know what's going on... we've got people going all over, we've got a fight going...

(He notices the man.)

Styles: You're Steve Austin!

Austin: (imitating Hulk Hogan) You know that's where you're wrong, Mean Joey, because Steve Austin doesn't have what it takes to get it done in the ECW, brother! I was never allowed to reach past midcard status in the WCW, brother! So you know what, dude? I looked at the greatest heavyweight champion of all time, brother, and I knew that I had to say my prayers, I had to take the vitamins. Brother, I had to start training again, I had to get my mind right to do what it takes to get it done in the ECW, dude! Now let me tell ya something, dude. I've been saying my prayers...

(Johnny Grunge wanders into the shot.)

Grunge: Aah! It's Steve-a-mania! Ohhhh! I'm a Steve-a-maniac too!

Austin: Let me tell ya something dude, the Stevester's here! Steve-a-mania is gonna run wild on the ECW brother... Steve... Steve-a-mania. I'm taking my vitamins, I'm saying my prayers, and...

(Suddenly, Austin stops, rips off his bandana and goes deadly serious.)

Austin: I'm not gonna do this sh-t anywhere! Not even in ECW!

(He rips his shirt off.)

Austin: Because there's no way this lame-ass sh-t is gonna get the job done ANYWHERE!

(He leaves through a curtain. Joey Styles looks around, bewildered.)

Styles: Oh my God...

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