The Wonderful World of Amazing Live Sea-Monkeys®
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Sea-Monkeys®

Sea-Monkey® Histogram

8/18/97- Purchased Official Sea-Monkey® Starter Kit
  • Purified water
  • 8/19/97- Added eggs to solution
  • Saw first 3 Sea Monkeys®
  • 8/20/97- Ordered "Port-a-Pet Playpen" Kit for $5.00
    8/21/97- Saw yes more, amazing sea-monkeys®.
    8/25/97- They are getting HUGE!!
    11/7/97- Man, they are still alive, and huge. One started smoking...
    11/8/97- Now he moved to smoking just cigars, expensive cubans...
    Stay tuned, updated constantly....
    NAMES COMING SOON!!

    Sea-Monkey® Tips

  • 1. Don't lie - Sea Monkeys® don't like it when people lie to them anymore than people do.
  • 2. Don't give them bananas - they may be monkeys but they will be suffocated by the large banana in their little tank.
  • 3. Don't eat them - you may enjoy the momentary taste but you certainly won't have the fun of watching your Sea-Monkeys® grow.
  • 4. Don't scream "Hey look at the Sea-Monkeys®" at them - they don't like to be reminded of their existence. (Sea-Monkeys® are docile creatures who prefer to remain clear of existential thought.) Similarly, Buddhist koans such as "what is the sound of one hand clapping" might make the Sea-Monkeys® realize the meaningless of their existence and this could cause mass Sea-Monkey® suicide
  • 5. Don't force your Sea-Monkeys® to mow the lawn - they have a severe allergy to freshly cut grass.
  • 6. Don't let your Sea-Monkeys® operate heavy equipment while under the influence of cold medication as it can make them drowsy.
  • 7. Do involve your Sea-Monkeys® in political discussion - despite the fact that most Sea-Monkeys® lean to the left!
  • 8. Do cover the Sea-Monkey® tank while engaged in marital relations as Sea-Monkeys® carry camcorders and aren't afraid to sell those tapes to "Hard Copy".
  • 9. If you run out of Sea-Monkey® food, please don't feed your Sea-Monkeys® just anything. Alowishus Devander Abercrombie figured he'd feed them some spaghetti-o's. The can must have had botulism or something. Please don't feed your sea monkeys anything out of a dented can, or any can for that matter.
  • Email: ralph11@hotmail.com

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