Where am I anyway? Is this the land of Nod? Why am I still here? Is there more I need to know? What have I become now? What the fuck am I? Am I even human?

'Yes, you are in the land of Nod. You're here for more guidance. There is plenty more you need to know. You are an angel of the darkness. You are still somewhat human. Any other questions?'

'Lillith?'

'Yes Drakan, it's me, Lillith. And no, I'm not dead. It was only a test, remember?'

'Yeah a test. Real funny, laughed my ass off all the way through it and even more afterwards. What do I need to learn now?'

'Your purpose in life. Your destiny as the Black Angel of comfort and vengeance. You give comfort to souls who need it. You strike vengeance upon the rotted souls who deserve it. This is your job. Any questions about that?'

'How do I judge who needs comfort and who needs vengeance?

'There's only one way to answer your question.' The blackness transforms back to a hospital emergency room.

'Do you remember this Drakan?' I nodded my head "yes".

'I was three years old, I was camping with my family and nobody was watching me when I tripped and fell into the campfire. I had third degree burns from the edge of my wrist to the end of my elbow. But why are you showing me this?'

'Because of what happened when your mother came in to talk to you. It wasn't a pleasant talk was it, Drakan?' I looked down in sadness.

'No, it wasn't.' I watch as the horror replays itself.

"Look at you. You're nothing but a worthless bastard. That's all you'll ever be. And quit crying!" She smacks me. "I'm sick of your goddamn crying! You're nothing but a little pussy. You've been crying about your fucking arm for the last few hours and I'm fucking sick of it!" She smacks me again.

"Mommy…"

"Don't you 'mommy' me you little whining piece of shit. I said quit crying!" Another smack to the face. "Grow up and deal with the pain. It can't hurt that bad you little pussy!"

'I was only three. What was I supposed to do? Tough it out like a man? I was nowhere near a man then. I hate that bitch.' My fists start to clench up.

'If this hits you hard then prepare yourself, it get worse.' The room transforms into my uncle's apartment.

'Uncle Tom's. I remember being sent there for a few weeks when I was five. I was also sent there every now and then after that.'

'What was your uncle?'

'A drug dealer. One that made sure that everything in his business went smoothly or else.' A prostitute enters the room and he gets up out of his recliner. 'He was also a pimp.'

"Where's the money you owe me?"

"I don't have it Tommy."

"Why not?"

"Because I…"

"SHUT UP! I will be deaf to any excuses you have to say. I've given you enough chances to get me the money. Now your gonna learn what you should have done." He decks her at full force. This sends her to the ground. He kicks her in the ribs.

"Get up bitch!" She tries but collapses to the ground.

"I said, GET UP BITCH!" He kicks her in the ribs again. She scrambles over to the wall and leans against it as a support to help her up. He backhands her twice and then rips off her shirt.

"Now this is how you handle a woman, Jason." He takes off her clothes with a fury that is unstoppable. He then fucks her on the spot. That sick fucker.

'Poor girl, she ended up in a dumpster the next day. I remember seeing her head in a garbage bag back in his room. In his terms "She was bumped and dumped."'

'That really shocked you as a child, didn't it?'

'That was the first time I ever saw him do anything like that. I saw more than a five year old should ever see over at that apartment. People were tortured and executed there too. I kind of got used to it after awhile. To think that I wanted to become him when I was young.'

'It's a good thing that you never did.'

'Tell me about it.'

The apartment transforms into a playground. The same playground next to my old preschool. I was four then. A little boy on a swing away from everybody else. It's hard to believe that one can be depressed at the age of four, but I was.

'Do you see the little brown-haired girl coming up to the swing set?' My eyes began to water.

'Holly.' I watch as the memory replays.

"What's wong?" she asks me

"Nothin'" I reply.

"Whatcha name?"

"Jason."

"I'm Holly. Pweased to meet chu."

'She was so sweet.'

'She was always a comfort to you, wasn't she? She was there for you when you two were growing up. As you were there for her. You both had the same problem, only hers was more serious.'

'We both suffered physical and mental abuse from one of our parents. I was beaten by my mother and called a worthless bastard everyday of my life by her. Holly's dad was her problem. He did pretty much the same thing only he took it a step farther.'

'He molested her.' I nodded my head "yes".

'She didn't shed a tear the day he died. She was ten when that happened. She seemed kinda happy when he passed away.'

'We'll get back to her later. What happened to you when you were ten?'

'What are you talking about?' The graveyard we were watching the burial in turned into the living room of my old house.

"Good-bye Jason, be good."

"I will Dad."

'Oh no, not this. Why must you show me this?'

'You must remember.' My babysitter walks in the room. The rather chunky woman with the curly long blonde hair. I think she was about thirty-something.

"Oh Jason, come here." That fucking tramp. That horny little bitch. She was calling from the bathroom. "It's time for you bath, Jason." I take off my clothes and get in the tub. She bathes me for awhile and then begins to take off her clothes.

"What are doing?" I ask her.

"Just stay still, I promise you'll enjoy this." She gets in the tub and starts kissing me. I could feel her weight on top of me like it was crushing my bones. I struggle to try to get away but she grabs my neck and pushes my head under the water.

"I told you to stay still! Do as I say and I'll let you live." I did as was told and told no one about it.

'People find it unusual that a male gets raped. In fact barely anybody would believe such a thing. But I found out the truth, the hard way.'

'It does happen, more often then people think. Now we go back to Holly.' This time we were by a lake in a park.

'The lake at Centennial Park on Union Road. August 4th, 1995. I had just turned thirteen a few weeks before. I remember this day. It was the day I asked out Holly. She said yes. Actually it was more like… "It's about goddamn time."' I said with a smile.

'Are you ready for what happened next?'

'Yes.' My house, April 26th 1996. I came home and on the answering machine were the words that have always been burned into my mind. I remember each word as it replays.

"Jason, this is Caryl, Holly's mom, Jason something horrible has happened. Last night Holly was with her friend David Powell at a park when she was raped and stabbed to death. I've been trying to get a hold of David but he's not home and nobody's seen him since last night. I just thought you'd like to know this. Call me whenever you can please. Bye." I watch as I lay on the kitchen floor crying again, screaming again, and raging again.

'Make it stop, Lillith. Stop showing me this, Lillith! STOP SHOWING ME THIS NOW!'

'You never did find him did you?'

'David? No I never did. I wanted to though. It was all I ever thought about.'

'Until you met Rose.'

Rose's apartment. A memory of the two of us spraying each other with whip cream in her kitchen.

'She had a lot to deal with in her life.'

'You tried to help her through it all. But it didn't work.'

'I should have done everything in my power. I should have searched for every vile of heroin and morphine that she had stashed away. I should have taken away her needles. I had the opportunity to save her, I just didn't see it at the time.' The apartment turns into the graveyard where she was buried. Her friend Jackie and I were the only ones that attended.

'I'm sorry Rose.'

'We all make mistakes.'

'But can we forgive ourselves for those mistakes? Can others forgive us for our mistakes?'

'Sometimes.'

'But never all the time. Okay Ghost of Christmas Past, is there anything else we need to see?

'Moving on to the last stop…'

'Let me guess, Amanda Paulie.'

'Correct.'

'Don't tell me you're actually going to show me this.' Amanda's bedroom. The night of our two month anniversary.

"Don't you have a boyfriend though?" asks Ricky.

"I don't care, do you?" she says.

"Not at all."

'She thought about me after the second time they had sex the morning after she said. They did it four times that night. I talked to him once and he said that the reason she had sex with him is because he would put out and I wouldn't.' The blue flames were burning in my hands ready to fire at them both.

'Calm yourself, Drakan. You can't do anything to her now.'

'Just let me get in one fireball and I'll be happy. Just one and I'll be happier than shit.'

'Do you understand why this happened?'

'Because she's a fucking dirty cunt!'

'Wrong! It's all fate, Drakan. Remember how Kelli cheated on her boyfriend with you? Fate had someone cheat on you to see how it felt to be Kelli's boyfriend, Chris. Do you see how he felt when he found out you had sex with his girlfriend?'

'Yes. And I suppose it was fate that Ricky cheated on her in their relationship and completely fucked her over to make her feel how I felt, right?'

'Correct again. You, however, now control fate. If somebody does something that causes a person emotional suffering then you use the eye for an eye rule. Make them feel what it feels like to have it happen to them. You can go by two ways: Physically or mentally. That is what you need to know. You give comfort to people that have suffered like you have suffered in the past, in your old life. You wreak vengeance upon those who cause such pain. Are there any final questions before I return you to the world?'

'Will I ever see you again?'

'If you have no one else to turn to for help, I'll be there. Good-bye for now, Drakan.'

'See ya Lillith.' The blue light surrounds me once again and find myself back home, in my room. I find all my things gone. My room seems as though I never existed. There are two bags in the middle and that's it. There is a note attached:

Dear Drakan,

What is in these bags are the only thing you need to survive. You need only one thing to live: Darkness. Darkness cleans you, Darkness feeds you, Darkness gives you energy. You don't even need air. Only when the sun is down can you come out for the night is what keeps you alive. You cannot feel pain, you cannot feel temperature, the only way you can feel is by using your mind.

The life you had before is now non-existent. The only person that remembers you is Brooke. She doesn't remember the test happening, but she remembers you. I know this sounds strange but you'll figure it out eventually. She still has memories of you. She knows you existed and she has already asked what happened to you but nobody even knew whom she was talking about.

You might ask why she wasn't made to think that you never existed. It's because Black Angels need a close friend so that they have someone to talk to and to be there for them. It's also so that the Black Angel doesn't feel alone in the world.

Anyway I let you go now to find a place to stay during the day. If all else fails try the abandoned cathedral downtown. You'll have to clean out the gang that is already there but I know you can do that.

Good luck and be careful!

Love,

Lillith

So I get to be a bum and people won't even be able to tell. That's great, I always wanted to be a fucking bum. How am I supposed to get cigarettes? As soon as I wonder that, a Marlboro Red appears between my fingers. I'm really beginning to like this darkness thing. I don't even need a lighter!

I walk out of my house and immediately check the bags. Weapons. All there is inside of them is weapons. Knives, guns, bombs, grenades; you name it it's in here. Well to save me the trouble I'm just going to go downtown and give the tenants inside of that cathedral a little eviction notice.

Downtown, such a messed up place; nothing but crackheads, drug dealers, and prostitutes on every corner of every street. I go to the cathedral and it's so run down it's not even funny. The doors are barricaded with wooden boards but a simple kick busts them down.

"What the fuck?!" Says a gang member just sitting there. "Who the fuck are you?"

"The landlord. I'm here to fix the place."

"Bullshit motherfucker!" He pulls out a handgun and shoots me with it. It heals back up and he just stares at me, eyes wide open. "What the fuck are you?!"

"I told you, I'm your new landlord. And I'm here with an eviction notice. Which means…" I pick him up by his chest and keep him in the air. "…LEAVE!" I force my hand through him and tear out his spine. Just then the rest of the gang shows up with automatic weapons. Bullets come at me in swarms that would sting much harder than a wasp, but not to me. I fall to the ground pretending to be dead.

The whole group comes up to me and they look down at my supposed lifeless body.

"Yeah motherfucker! Don't be fuckin wit our shit bitch!"

"Yeah! How's it feel to be dead!"

"I don't know." I reply. "Why don't you tell me?" I unsheathe my sword and spin it around, chopping off all of their legs. They lay there and wiggle around for awhile before they finally give up and die.

My boots are soaked with blood and so is the floor around me. I should check to see if there is anyone else hiding out. I search the place all over. I finally find someone in the backroom. A black girl, mid-twenties, just curled up in the corner crying her eyes out.

"Please…don't kill me," she begs.

"I'm not going to kill you. Do you have any place to go?"

"No, sir."

"Do you have a job?" she nods her head.

"My body is my job, sir." Oh man. Something tells me I'm going to be dealing with people that have worse problems then her. What should I tell her?

"You can stay here for awhile. Save up your money though so that you can afford a place of your own. I take it you never graduated from high school?"

"Yes, sir. I did, sir." She's very polite and well mannered for a prostitute.

"Well whatever help you need with forming your own life, just let me know and I'll see what I can do. In the meantime the rules are simple: you have your space, I have my space. Whatever you do is your business, whatever I do is my business. No questions asked between the two of us. Understood?"

"Yes, sir."

"Good. I'm going out for a little while, I have something to attend to. By the way, what is your name?"

"Tanisha."

"I'm Drakan."

So now where do I go? What do I do? How do I know where to go? So many questions, no answers. Think, who do I know that needs help? I know the perfect person.

Amanda Paulie, my ex. She has so many problems with her. Sometimes I actually felt sorry for her. Other times it actually seems like she deserves what happens to her. She can't really help it though, her sister is a prostitute and has been put in jail for it. Kind of makes me wonder if it's just a genetic thing.

I jump on to the piece of roof that sticks out in front of her bedroom window. There's a light on so I know she's there. I look into the window and nobody is in there though. I unlock and open it with the use of telekinesis. I wait inside, just sitting on her bed, waiting for her to come in.

Eventually she does come in the room and almost screams but I give the command…

"Silence." Immediately she shuts her mouth. "You don't remember me at all, do you?"

"No, who are you?"

"An ex-acquaintance of yours. I've come here to help you out with the problems you have."

"What problems?"

"Your Libido, it needs help. Listen to me for I'm going to say this to you and you will do as I say. You shall never cheat on anyone ever again. Your boyfriend should mean more to you than any other guy. You shall never drink another drop of alcohol again. Alcohol has a tendency to make you forgot about those you supposedly care about. Is this clear?"

"Yes."

"You've hurt many people in the past, would you like to feel their pain?"

"Not really."

"Too fucking bad." I grab her head and make her feel what I felt when she cheated on me. The fact that it happened to me a lot in my old life just destroyed me more when it happened to me yet again. She begins to clench her fists and tighten her lip. She opens her mouth to try and scream again but I cup my hand over her mouth to block out the sound.

"How do you feel, Amanda?"

"Like I want to kill myself."

"Don't bother. I know your future. It doesn't look to happy."

"What do you know?"

"I'm can't tell you that, it wouldn't be any fucking fun that way." Seriously I can't tell the future, it's just fun to fuck with people like that.

"It's time for me to leave now Amanda. I hope that you've learned something from my visit. Good-bye."

"Bye."

Now what? I have no idea where to go or what to do. I think I'll just go back to the cathedral.

I arrive back at the cathedral. Tanisha is still here. I think she's taking a break from her job tonight. Maybe I should at least talk to her. After all, I am supposed to give comfort to those who need it.

"Tanisha?"

"Yes?"

"I know I said that we'd just keep things to ourselves and mind each other's business but I was wondering how did you end up this way?"

"Well, it wasn't by choice dear. After high school I tried to get into college but I never had enough money for any college. My mother is the only family I had left and she died two years ago. She wanted to help me out with going to college but she barely had enough money to support herself. So I started to sell myself on the streets. One day I ran into my friend from high school, Tyrone. He said that if I wanted to I could come work for his gang and he would help me out. He didn't really help me out though. It was strange to see the way he acted as a gang leader of organized crime. He was so different than when I knew him back in high school. He was fierce now, an uncontrollable temper. If somebody did something wrong he made sure that they would never do it again. I couldn't believe it was even him anymore. Back in school he would never hit me, not once. But…" she begins to cry and hang her head low, "…but he seemed to hit me as though he liked it. It seems kind of funny now that I think of it. I was in love with that man. I loved him, I told him that too. But he didn't care. You no what he did when I told him that? He smacked me across the face and told me to never say it again. He said that he didn't want to be loved by some dirty whore. But it doesn't matter now that he's dead."

"I'm sorry I killed him. Believe it or not, that's my job. I've been sent to kill those who do things like Tyrone did. I've also been sent to help those like you."

"Are you an angel?"

"I guess you can say that."

"I thought so. Nothing that's living could've survived that many bullets."

"So do you have any friends at all?"

"The only friends I had died by your hand, and they weren't really friends anyway."

"Then consider me a friend. Just that I'm here for you whenever you need it."

"Thank you, sir." So where do I get my information from anyway?

'From me.'

'Who are you?'

'You know me only as your boss, and you'll refer to me only as so. You want to know where to go, who to help, who to destroy? I'm the person that tells you all that. I'm your guidance.'

'Where are you?'

'That's not important right now. What is important is your job. Your job right now is to find Zack Riley. Zack Riley is a child abuser, rapist, molester, the works. He needs to have a change of mind about what he does. Your job is to give him that change of mind. Here's what he looks like.' An image flashes in my head. The image is of a man with short, blonde hair. He's five foot eleven inches tall with a small, scrawny build. He lives in an apartment building a few blocks away in apartment 3A.

Within a few minutes I'm at the door. I hear something inside. A child, sounds to be about four years old, she is crying for her mother. The sick fuck. He's going down.

I knock on the door. "Stay here and be quiet!" He says to her. He opens the door.

"How may I help you?"

"I'm looking for a little girl."

"There aren't any here."

"May I look around?"

"Sure, go ahead." As I walk down the hallway I read his mind just in case he tries anything. I look in the bathroom, nothing there. I begin walking towards a room in the back when I hear him get the thought of bashing me over the head with the lead pipe in his hand. He lifts it up as to hit me over the head with it but I grab it from him when he brings it down and I sweep his legs out from under him.

"Nice try, fuckhead. But you've gotta be faster than that." I rest my right foot on his chest. "WHERE'S THE GIRL?!"

"In the closet." I open the closet and there is a little blonde-haired girl curled up in the corner. She has cuts all over her, no clothes, and she's sitting in a puddle of her own piss. That poor thing.

"Hey fuckhead, do you have any shirts?"

"There's some in the closet there." I grab a shirt and put it on her. It's big enough to cover her up from shoulders to knees.

"Do you live near by?" I ask her. She nods her head yes. "Where?"

"Across the hall."

"Go to your mother child." She runs out the door as fast as she can.

"What are you going to do to me?" he asks.

"Everything but kill you." I tie him down to his bed and pull out a razor sharp knife.

"First I'm going to make sure that you don't have a reason to rape children anymore." I slam the knife down into crotch. I then twist and turn, pulling it out and then bringing it down again and again. The pillow tied down around his face muffles his screams of agonizing pain. Next I take off his hand at the wrists and his feet at the ankles. After that I take off the pillow and I cut off his tongue and nose. Then for a finishing touch, I cut out the left eye and then the right eye.

"This is what is called the pain. As you notice I have left your ears and I will tell you why: So that every woman and child that sees you and screams, every man and elder that sees you and says "Dear God, What is that thing?" will ring in your perfect ears for the rest of your life. Enjoy you sick fucking bastard."

'You went a little too far there.'

'Did I? I didn't think so.'

'I did. Try to be a little less vengeful in the future.'

'So, what's next?'

'There's a crime boss up the street from here. Right now he's in the park, he's making sure that an associate of his learns his lesson.'

'How man gangs are there?'

'After you take him out then that will be the last one. After that you have a lot of people that need some guidance in their life. But you might want to take care of them tomorrow night. For the sun should probably be rising after you take this last gang out.'

I go to the park and sure enough there is a gang of people there, taking turns at beating some guy up. How weak. I don't even want to show off on these kills because I'm getting tired. I bring out my favorite 9mms and start shooting. Down they go, one by one, dropping like flies. I walk up to the man that they were hassling.

"Leave here, and speak nothing about what happened."

"No-no-no-no…no problem, mister." I'm more tired than I was before. It looks like the sun is about to rise. I should head back home. It's time for me to rest now. I can only imagine what waits for me tomorrow night.