Out of habit, Rose ran her hands through her hair and thought briefly about putting it up, then cast that idea away. It didn't matter how presentable she looked. She grabbed her shawl off the back of the chair in front of her dressing table, and hurried from the room, draping it over her shoulders as she went. Ruth, still sitting on the loveseat in the sitting room, glanced up as she came in. She rose to her feet almost instantly. "Rose, what on earth are you doing?" "Going to find Jack," Rose answered flatly without stopping, intent on the doorway. "Are you mad! You can't go after him. This is dangerous, Rose, and I forbid it -" but Ruth stopped abruptly, staring vacantly, and then slowly ran a hand over her eyes. Rose had paused at the doorway and spun to face her mother, her mouth opening to fire back a sharp retort - "Go," Ruth said, so low that she had to strain to hear her. "Go. Do what you wish." Rose stared for a moment, then nodded and disappeared into the hallway, and Ruth sank back down onto the couch. In that moment she had finally let her daughter go. And although their past relationship had been anything but normal, what she was feeling were the pangs of every grieving mother who has at last sent her child away from the protection and shelter she has always provided. But she also felt pride, at what kind of person Rose had grown up to be, so brave, so determined . . . and so deep was her love for another that she was willing to sacrifice anything for him. "You know, James," she murmured, tears shining in her eyes, "after all this time... maybe I did something right after all." *** Rose found her way to third class. She heard the band playing as she neared the stairway to the common room, and prayed that she'd find Jack out on the dance floor, whirling the little girl around again, and all her worries were for nothing... She hurried down the steps. As people caught sight of her, they smiled and waved, recognizing her from two nights previous. She smiled distractedly back, and scanned the room in search of a familiar face. "Rose!" She jerked her head around at her name being called, and squinted into the throng of people on the makeshift dance floor. Then a movement caught her eye, and she spotted Tommy Ryan pushing his way through the crowd. Even across the room she saw that his face was strained, and her heart did a twist as a sudden terror cut through her. "Tommy!" She left the stairs and met him at the edge of the dance floor. "What is it? Where is Jack?" she asked anxiously. He shook his head grimly. "I haven't seen him all day," he said in his lilting Irish brogue. "I've been looking but he isn't in his cabin. He isn't anywhere. A couple of hours ago, two men came in from first class. They were looking for him too." Rose sucked in her breath. "Was it Cal? My fiancé - he's tall, handsome, dark hair -" Tommy was nodding. "Yeah, that sounds like one of them," he said. "He did all the talking. The other, he didn't say anything, just watched." "Lovejoy," Rose murmured, putting it together instantly. So they'd come looking for Jack. But a couple hours of ago he'd still been with Rose. Had they found him, then, after they'd separated? And what had they done if they had? Why had Lovejoy been watching them at dinner? Where were they now? Unanswerable questions reeled in her mind. She closed her eyes briefly and prayed for Jack's safety, prayed that she'd be given some sort of sign or clue, as to what she should do - "Rose?" The new voice broke in and Rose opened her eyes, recognizing it instantly. Fabrizio had paused beside them, his dark eyes worried. "You seen Jack?" he asked her, catching her eye. Even with the thick accent, there was no mistaking the strain in his voice. "I left him an hour ago," Rose answered, trying to focus. "Where?" Tommy wanted to know. "The first class stairway, near my stateroom." Rose paused. "I assume he started back here right away, and he probably went by way of the boatdeck. I was just up there and there was no sign of him, but I'll need to search thoroughly. He may have just stopped somewhere out of sight." Wishful thinking, Rose, a cold inner voice told her. You know what happened to him. Rose pushed the voice away and struggled to remain calm. "Let's split up and search this area first," she said. "Fabrizio, can you check the cabin, see if maybe we missed him and he's just back there?" Fabrizio nodded and headed for the doorway. Tommy studied her with his dark eyes. "I'll look outside," he said, nodding toward the door that led out to the third class deck. "Then we'll all go up to the boatdeck." Rose nodded and watched him shoulder his way through the crowd. She was suddenly glad to have Tommy and Fabrizio. Their determination to find Jack reassured her. After scanning the room, Rose was certain he was not at the party. She began approaching people, asking if they had seen a man with blond hair who carried a sketchbook with him. Most of them knew Jack and promised they'd keep an eye out for him. She was grateful for the help of these unselfish people, and at that moment, unconsciously ceased to see them as any different from herself. Fabrizio came back, shaking his head. "He's not in the room," he said. "His sketchbook is still where he left it this morning." Rose bit her lip, then nodded. "Let's go get Tommy," she urged. "Rose." Fabrizio's voice stopped her, and she turned back. "Yes?" "I need to say . . ." he paused, struggling through the language barrier for words. "I resent you at first. I think you too - too good for Jack. But he really too good for you. I look out for Jack, he look out for me - like brothers, no?" He hesitated. "But now I see that you care about him." He smiled at her. "And I understand why he lost his head over you." Rose smiled back, understanding what he meant despite the shaky english. "Thank you, Fabrizio," she said gently. "Thank you for telling me that." "Now we go find him together, no?" Fabrizio smiled grimly, gesturing toward the door, where Tommy was just entering the common room - alone. "Yes. Now we go find him." Rose led the way toward Tommy, praying that she'd see Jack again. |
