Why?
A Sequel to "Decisions"
By Pikajen
Author's Note: Don't read this until you have read Decisions.
-Pikajen
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'll never forget that night. The long, cold night when my best friend died.
Now don't get me wrong, people in my life have died, it's just that way being a member of Team Rocket, but Jessie always seemed so smart, so confident. I never thought she would choose to do something so... final.
I was the first one she told that James had dumped her. I knew she was aching terribly inside, but she hid her emotions, just like always. When I invited her to the party, I didn't even know James was going to be there, let alone with Sara.
The minute I heard that those two were dating, I thought of Jessie. I knew she''d be devastated that James already had a girlfriend. Sure enough, I saw her run to the washroom, tears in her eyes, so I followed.
After Dan came in and teased the hell out of Jessie, she kicked him in the stomach and ran out of the house. I kicked and yelled at Dan as he was lying on the tile floor, then walked out of the bathroom.
A few minutes passed, until suddenly, I got this terrible feeling that I should have gone after Jessie. I rushed through crowds of people and out the door. As I tried to figure out which way to go, a sharp, cold chill ran through my body and I feared something terrible had happened.
I bolted down the street, something inside of me telling me where to go. I finally reached my destination, a concrete sidewalk, under a high bridge. All my fears came true. I saw Jessie lying on the pavement, surrounded in blood. I started crying wildly.
"Oh god. No, Jessie." I screamed. I already knew she had jumped. "Why, Jess?" I kneeled next to her lifeless body, then let myself cry onto her blood-stained uniform. She was still warm. That meant she couldn't have jumped more than a minute ago. I cried even harder. I cried near my deceased friend until some other Team members found me and helped me take Jessie back to the hide-out.
I was filled with confusion for the next couple of days. One minute I'd be sad that my best friend had died, the next I'd be angry that she had done such a stupid thing. Somehow, I knew that deep down she didn't really want to die.
The funeral was strange for me. I don't think I'd ever been to one like this before. She had a closed casket, with a Team Rocket flag draped over it. James was trying not to cry, Dan wasn't there and Meowth was acting really strange. He just lay on his seat, not making a sound, eyes wide open, staring at the ceiling. This was very different than any other death that had ever occurred in Team Rocket.
After the funeral, I found Dan. He was in his room, lying face-down on his bed. "Dan?" I asked quietly.
"What?" his muffled voice came from the pillow.
"Why weren't you at the funeral?"
"I have my reasons."
I sat on his bed. "Which were?"
He turned over and sat up. His face was stained with tears and his eyes were red and puffy. This shocked me tremendously because I had never seen Dan cry before. "It was my fault."
"What do you mean?"
"I killed her. I was tormenting her and I did it enough to make her kill herself."
"Dan, please. You know that's not true."
"Yes it is. You know it too. It was all my fault." At that, he started crying again.
"It's okay, Dan." I hugged him. We stayed that way for a long time.
Now I know what you're thinking. The latest couple: Dan and Melanie. No. I was simply comforting him. My next stop was James and Meowth's room.
"James? Meowth?" I opened the door. It was really dark and the lights were out. I switched them on. Meowth was still in the same position on the floor. I walked over to where he lay and placed him on the bed. "Meowth? Come on, snap out of it."
"Meowth." he said sorrowfully.
"Meowth. Come on!" I said just a little more harshly.
"Meowth." he turned over onto his stomach.
"I know you miss Jessie. I do too. We all do. Talk to me."
"Why did she do it?" he finally spoke up.
"I don't know. I don't think she meant to." Meowth fell into my lap, crying and saying something about wanting Jessie to come back. I stroked him until he fell asleep. I was about to get up and leave when James walked in.
"What are you doing here?" he angrily asked.
"I was just calming down Meowth."
"I could've done that." I had no idea as to why James was acting so irritated, but I defended myself by yelling back at him.
"Well, you weren't here. Where the hell were you anyway?"
"The expression on James' face suddenly changed and his answer was quiet. "I broke up with Sara."
I gasped. "Why?"
"I didn't really like her, I just was so used to having a girlfriend, I picked up the first girl I saw." I nodded. "I'm so stupid. I didn't realize that I wanted didn't want Sara and I really wanted Jessie until she killed herself."
"If you wanted her, why did you dump her?"
"I don't know. Something went through my mind that just..."
"I understand."
"And I guess it didn't help when I made fun of her."
"Why did you do that anyway?"
"Dan was teasing me about still wanting her, so I guess I had to prove to him that I really didn't like her anymore."
"But you did?"
"Very much. I guess I didn't realize it. It's like that Joni Mitchell song "You don't know what you got 'till it's gone"
"Uh huh." I gave him a hug and was about to go on my way, when he stopped me.
"What I said about me being able to calm down Meowth probably isn't true. Do you think you could take him for a while?"
"Sure." I picked up the sleeping pokimon, gave James a quick peck on the cheek and left.
I went back to my room, wondering where Jessie was. I put Meowth on a chair and went to the window. Jessie's death stirred up the team alot more than any other had. As I stared up at the sky, I knew that Jessie would be watching us all from wherever she was.
