Ahh, yet another award show...and who could have guessed that Britney would be wearing LESS clothing this time? The wonder that is trailer park trash. I mean honestly people, where the hell does she find those outfits anyhow? I just love the fact that since she's 'over the belly' or whatever she says in her stupid Teen People interview, that she finds one of the most revealing cleavage JUMPSUITS EVER. The least she could do is find something that is halfway flattering and doesn't amplify her big ass booty any more than it already is. But I digress....
Moving right along to CHRISTINA's performance. WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?! Not only was her stomach...ORANGE (nice fake tanner sweetie), but her outfit was put together by a blind lady. Good lord. Red leather shit pants and baby blue top with sequins on the shoulder. Now, that's what I call a cute outfit. *Gag*
And finally....N Sync. I must say that the whole 25 ft tall puppet things were...interesting and innovative. I'm not being facecious. I really did like those, however the fact that Justin's puppet had a large jTr medallion scared me. A LOT. ALMOST as much as the puppet Justin's catepillar like eyebrows. Yikes. Then we have the JC puppet, which is the second one I got a good long look at, and I was wondering why they decided that a brown streak on his face would serve as a good 'chiseled cheekbone' look. Actually, it just looks like a big shit stain on his cheek...lol. Crude, I know, but so true. And one more comment, cuz I only got a good look at puppet Joey....he wasn't fat enough.
Okay....so the whole Pinocchio thing was cute...I liked it. Much props to them for being Disney's bitches once again. The performance itself was crunk...although the puppetmaster's hands in the background were a little distracting. They could have gotten rid of those if you ask me. And then, onto the background dancers. Did ANYONE else wonder for a moment if Backstreet Boy Nick Carter wasn't REALLY on vacation, and just filling in as one of N Sync's puppet boys? LOL. I about died. Too funny. I really liked how N Sync just popped out of the floor though...and many props to the color choices. Jc in green...instead of Lance. Nice...very nice. Lance in red...he's on fiya, oh boy he's on fiya...it's a HEAT WAVE. Lol...a little Wild Orchid interlude there for ya. Joey in blue wasn't AS revolting as usual, but whatever. And Chris was looking fione in purple, not to mention his dance moves were less arthritic than normal. Then we come to Justin. Poor, poor Justin. They wouldn't let him wear baby blue, so instead he chose mustard yellow...and oddly enough, it matched his hair color. In a word, disgusting.
The song was great, the dance moves were crunk (seen em before, so it's old news now, but whatever), and even though I mistook Justin for Colonel Mustard....which by the way if you want to know, all of them could have been Clue characters in those colors. Examples:
JC: Mr. Green
Lance: Miss Scarlet (hey it fits)
Joey: Mrs. PeaCOCK
Chris: Professor Plum (hey he studied psychology...right?)
And then like I mentioned, Justin as Colonel Mustard. Wow it's just a board game waiting to happen. In any case, I really did like this performance, and I've watched my tape of it several times since then, only to get the Pinocchio song stuck in my head as I bop around the room doing the 'lasso dance'. Oh well...