Have I Told You Lately?

Author: Jvantheterrible

Date: June 4th — 11th, 2001 (Christ almighty, is it really JUNE already?)

Rating: NC-17, and NO, this is NOT songfic!!!

Warnings: Violence, M/M sex, angst, MAJOR h/c, and bad language. I've discovered that I REALLY like "Blair owwies" and "Jim comfort"…and I MEAN IT WHEN I SAY THAT BLAIR GETS REALLY HURT HERE. If moderate electrocution and a little flesh-carving squick you, DON’T READ THIS. My muse is feeling a little overly dramatic this week…

Pairing: J/B

Disclaimer: Characters of 'The Sentinel' belong to Petfly, Paramount, and Bilson/DeMeo. I can't believe two men actually WROTE this show, but they did...and may the gods bless them. No monies being made here...if I ever DO make money from my writing (which I hope to someday), it will be from my OWN characters, thank you VERY much.

Author's Notes: I really appreciate ALL of you that have written me to tell me that I am doing all right with this SenFic stuff. Some of you have read my XF fic, and I am HONORED that I have managed to successfully cross over into a whole new realm, sans flame-age. Thank you ALL for reading. For Alyjude (sorry it took so long!) - darling, hope you're feeling better! OH, yes...and thank you EVER SO to Christopher, for helping me remember that one scene in that one movie...I worked it in however vaguely <g>.

Feedback: Welcomed to JVAdesignage@aol.com. Flames? Well, it WAS 104 degrees here today, so no thanks. Besides…I DID give you a warning.

Author's Website: Senfic at www.angelfire.com/oh3/SkinnerSanctum/index6.html

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FRIDAY NIGHT

857 PROSPECT

"Oh my GODS that was fucking incredible," Blair gasped, trying to catch his breath as he rolled off his lover and nestled against the larger man's side. Jim laughed, nearly breathless himself, nodding in agreement. "I didn't think it would work that way, man," Sandburg whispered as Jim rolled onto his side and threw one muscular arm across his lover's furry chest.

"I tried to tell you, Chief," Ellison murmured into his lover's ear, reveling in the curls that surrounded his face as he found Blair's ear beneath the onslaught, "Where there's a will, there's a way," he grinned evilly, biting Sandburg's earlobe and forcing yet another groan out of his mate.

"Have I told you lately that I love you, Jim?" Sandburg asked, turning his head and forcing Jim's face from his mop of hair so that the Sentinel had no choice but to meet the smoky blue gaze focused on him. Not that Ellison would ever complain about that...

"Yeah, Chief, you have...I believe it's been all of about...let's see..." Jim droned off, looking at the clock on the nightstand next to the bed, "Ten minutes since you last told me. But I'm always more than happy to hear it again so that it's more than groans," he finished smugly, chuckling again and gracing Blair with a full-fledged Ellison grin as he bent closer to kiss his lover soundly on his already love-swollen lips.

"Well, I'm telling you again," Blair said stubbornly but with a loving gleam in his eyes. "I can never tell you that too many times, man," Sandburg said, taking the hand that Ellison had resting on his stomach into his own and wrapping their strong fingers together. Jim pulled the entwined digits to his lips and kissed them, resting them once again just above Blair's navel before he lay back down on his side to allow them both to regroup.

After several minutes had passed, Blair spoke, breaking the silence as he usually did, albeit usually not with so dreary a thought, "Jim, have you ever wondered what would happen if...I mean, what if this was the last time I ever got to tell you that I loved you?"

Jim tensed next to Blair, pulling his hand from his lover's and sitting up against the headboard suddenly, his features instantly grim from the sated relaxation they'd expressed only seconds before. "What the hell, Chief?" Jim asked, senses dialed high as he listened for Blair's heartbeat...thump-thump, thump-thump, thump-thump...nope, no threat there.

"Nuh-nothing, man, really, I was just-" Blair started, only to be cut off by Jim's indignant, "You're damn RIGHT nothing," he glowered at his lover, "What's going through your head that you would ask me such a thing, Sandburg?" Ellison spat, making Blair wince despite the mutual love they'd just shared. "We just finished trying out something that both of us have wanted to do for months...and now, out of the blue, you decide to ask me THAT?"

Jim swung his legs out from under the covers, leaving the bed all too cold and lonely for his lover's liking. Naked, he strode across the bedroom and yanked open his dresser drawer, pulling out a pair of black silk boxers and stepping into them, shooting a look of pure misery at Blair before he stomped downstairs, shaking his head the entire way. "Want something to drink, Chief?" Jim called from the kitchen, and Blair rolled over onto his side in the bed, staring blankly at the wall as he answered with a murmured, "No, thanks," still loud enough for Sentinel hearing.

"Fine," Sandburg heard Jim growl from downstairs. Blair had spent a lot of time thinking about his question. He realized that it would probably be a mistake to ask Jim what he thought about it; but ever since Blair himself had become a full-fledged officer, he KNEW that there was always the possibility that one of them might not make it home one day. He had resolved himself to just THINKING it before now, but it had been almost a year...and Blair was afraid. Daily afraid. Especially afraid because of the numerous times he himself had been kidnapped. And held hostage. And shot at. And that was all before he'd even become official as Jim's partner. He couldn't help himself; there was always the chance that one or the other of them would be injured beyond repair. He'd ONLY wanted Jim to KNOW how much he loved him.

Minutes later, Jim reappeared at the top of the stairs, and Blair purposely remained on his left side, facing away from his lover. He didn't want Jim to see the tears that slid silently down his cheeks as he imagined his life without his Blessed Protector in it. He prayed to all that he believed in that that day would never come, but it gnawed at him; worked on his resolve until said resolve was no more than ashes in the breeze. Damn living with a Sentinel; Jim smelled his tears and crawled back into the bed behind his Guide's back, gingerly placing a hand on Blair's bare right shoulder.

"Chief? Jesus, I'm...I'm sorry. I just didn't expect you to ask me that, you know? I mean...we just had this AMAZING experience, and then there you are asking me about one of us...SHIT," Jim said, exasperated. "Blair, come on...baby, don't cry, please," Jim begged, gently rolling his lover onto his back. Ellison used the tips of his fingers to wipe the moisture from Sandburg's face, kissing each trail as it was cleared. "I love you so much, Blair," Jim whispered to his Guide, nearly choking up himself as his lover's moist azure gaze met his own.

"C'mere," Jim instructed Blair as he opened his arms towards the younger man. Blair straddled his Sentinel, albeit less erotically than minutes before, pressing his hairy chest against the muscular bare one beneath him. Flaccid flesh rested against equally spent muscle, both men enjoying the simple comfort of dual contact. The warmth and heat of their bodies soothed the other, allowing both men to relax in one another's somewhat desperate grasp.

"Never wanna' lose you, man," Blair whispered into Jim's ear as he pressed his body impossibly closer to his lover's, his arms tightening around Ellison's neck, "Never, Jim. Love you so much," he proclaimed, and Jim smiled as his Guide's hair flowed over his face, drinking in every scent and nuance of Blair Sandburg. The Sentinel smiled as he wrapped his arms around his love, pulling the younger man closer to him, feeling every beat of his heart and every minute twitch of muscle as his embrace was fervently returned. "Never, Chief," Ellison replied quietly in Blair's ear, smiling as Blair finally gently dismounted his Sentinel's prone form to lay next to him in his usual fetal position, his lover spooned around him protectively, and they both drifted off into exhausted slumber.

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TUESDAY MORNING

CASCADE P.D. BULLPEN

"Ellison. Sandburg. My office, NOW," Banks bellowed, and Sentinel and Guide rolled their eyes at one another as they simultaneously rose and headed for their Captain's door. Jim put a hand on Blair's back, as he usually did, and Sandburg blushed and smiled a bit - as HE usually did - at his Sentinel's unconscious reaction.

As both men entered Simon's office, they each took their respective seats in front of the Captain; Jim in the chair directly opposite Banks' desk, and Blair resting his ass on the corner of said desk.

"Dammit Sandburg, haven't you learned ANYTHING in all the time you've been in this department?" Simon groused at him, getting a smirk and a shrug back as Blair stood and took the seat next to his partner in all things. The two detectives glanced at one another and shared a slight smile as Banks rolled his own eyes and began his usual tirade.

"All right you two, listen up," Simon began, his dark eyes and dark face exuding what could only be described as 'dark vibes' according to Sandburg, "This is serious, so pay attention." The Captain of Major Crimes went into detail about the current crisis in Cascade, and both men listened and nodded intently. A strangler was on the loose, and was preying on young college-aged men - with increasing intensity in his methods. There had been three corpses thus far, and there was NO evidence to be had. The perp obviously had some sort of police or forensics experience - not so much as a FINGERPRINT had been gained at any of the past crime scenes, and the entire city was getting antsy - despite all attempts at holding the news crews back as much as possible. It was only a matter of time before the story exploded all over Cascade, Washington - let alone the entire country - and Banks was ready for justice.

Jim listened patiently and calmly...until Banks gave up his plan of attack. "NO," Jim shouted, standing up and shaking his head violently back and forth, now standing and bent over with his hands braced against his boss's desk, "NO way, Sir. There has to be some other way...he can't," Ellison snarled as he tried to absorb his superior's idea, "Please sir, isn't there -" Jim was cut off as Blair spoke up.

"What do I have to do, Simon?" Blair inquired calmly while he ignored the daggers of Jim's glare as he took in his Captain's plan and nodded stoically.

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TUESDAY EVENING

857 PROSPECT

After eating a very silent meal together at a diner up the street from the loft, the tension had become unbearable. Blair had figured that they would be able to talk things through when they got home, but as soon as Ellison slammed the door closed behind them once they'd entered the loft, all bets were off. Jim threw his keys into the basket so hard that the wicker dropped to the floor with a loud 'thud', and Blair winced slightly as he hung up his coat; it was going to be a looooong night, he thought to himself.

Jim stomped around the loft, ignoring his Guide's obvious discomfort and unease as long as he could before he finally shouted, "GODDAMMIT, Blair...What the FUCK were you thinking today?" Ellison stood inches away from his partner/Guide/lover's face as he growled, trying hard to get a grip on his emotions as he tried harder to envision the next day's events. Blair had simply agreed to play along with Simon's plan - offering himself up as bait before Jim had even had a chance to disagree and give at least five thousand reasons why his Guide/partner/lover was NOT suitable as a decoy.

Holding his hands up in obvious defeat, Sandburg attempted to calm Ellison, "Jim, man, come ON. I'm the epitome of this freak's obsession. All I have to do is go in, wag my ass a little, and we'll have him. BAM. Case closed," he finished as he snapped his fingers for emphasis.

"I don't like it, Chief. Not one fucking bit," Ellison snarled as he toed off his shoes and strode across the living room to stand at the picture window overlooking Cascade. "This guy's a fucking animal, Blair. If anything goes wrong," Jim's voice trailed off and Blair saw his partner visibly shudder in the waning daylight streaming in through the glass.

"Jim, we've handled guys ten times worse than this before. There's no reason for you to think that anything would go wrong, man. Come on Jim; you're my Blessed Protector. You won't LET anything go wrong," Sandburg finished quietly.

"Yeah, Blair. What could possibly go wrong? I mean, you only DROWNED because I didn't make it in time. You've only gotten SHOT - what, three times now? - because I wasn't right there to protect you. You've only been kidnaped and held hostage -" Sandburg cut him off before he could finish painting his grim picture.

"Hey, easy big guy," Blair murmured as he sidled up behind Jim and put his arms around the other man's waist so he could press a tender kiss to the back of Ellison's neck. "Relax, Jim. It'll be okay. You KNOW I've been waiting for a chance like this to really prove myself to the rest of the team, man." The Sentinel spun around fast, causing Blair to lose his hold around his lover.

"Is that what this is all about, Chief? Because you KNOW the guys ALL respect the hell out of you. They know you're a good cop; if this is all about you needing to prove some kind of point, why don't you just wait until-" Sandburg cut Ellison off again.

"Wait for what, Jim," the younger man spat as he turned his back to his partner for a moment and tried to collect his thoughts. He turned back around and faced Jim's clenched jaw and grim expression, "You don't think I can handle this?" Blair asked quietly as he continued, "You think that only Mr. Detective-Of-The-Year three years running can handle a case like this? You don't think I've got what it takes, do you, Jim?" Blair felt the lump in his throat as it threatened to choke him, and the rage that flowed across Jim's features did little to put him any more at ease.

"Goddammit, you're so fucking hard-headed sometimes," Ellison said through clenched teeth that might shatter at any moment, "This has NOTHING to do with your job abilities. It does, however, have one FUCK of a lot to do with the fact that you're my Guide, my partner, my lover...my fucking LIFE, Chief," Jim exploded finally as he grabbed Blair's shoulders and pulled him close. Ellison buried his nose in the auburn curls and whispered fiercely, "I love you, Blair. Please, just tell Simon you've reconsidered and we'll get someone from Vice...I have a bad feeling about this one, Chief."

The younger detective shook his head back and forth slowly, relishing the feel of Jim's face (and both of his hands) buried in his hair, Sandburg wrapped his arms once again around his Sentinel's waist and said, "Let's go to bed, Jim. I'm tired, and we've got an early day tomorrow." Blair pulled away from Ellison and headed up the stairs for their now-shared room, but Jim didn't move from his place in the middle of the living room, his gaze still focused on his sock-clad feet. "You go ahead, Chief. I'll be up in a little while."

Hours later, after Jim had paced an almost visible line into the wood floor of the loft, he found his way up the stairs and disrobed. He slid into the bed carefully so as not to wake his snoozing lover and wrapped himself gently around his Guide, thankful that Blair couldn't hear his silent prayers to whomever was listening to keep the younger man safe the next day. Holding Sandburg close to his chest, a lone tear rolled down Jim's cheek as he squeezed his eyes shut and hoped for the best - when all he could manage to envision was the worst.

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WEDNESDAY AFTERNOON

CASCADE P. D. BULLPEN

"Alright Sandburg, are you all clear on the plan of attack?" Captain Banks asked, ignoring Jim's nasty look from beside his partner; the two men were in Banks' office, preparing for their final debriefing before heading out into the field. They'd gone over and over the details since the pair's arrival at the station four hours earlier, and Blair managed to roll his eyes one more time at Simon's and Jim's constant coddling.

"Yes, Captain. I am ready, and would you please let my partner know that I am more than capable of handling this case, and I wish that he would try to breathe a bit between his sessions of growling at me," Blair answered exasperatedly. Jim's head snapped around to find Blair's innocent indigo gaze on his own infuriated one, and he just shook his head as he looked away.

"Sandburg," Simon's voice held a warning; the older man knew that this would be the true test of the two mens' partnership. Before, it had always been Jim in the hot seat...this time it was Blair's turn. Ellison simply did not fit the perp's range of interest, and Blair all-but-screamed it. Rearranging his glare from Blair to Jim, Simon growled, "Ellison, the kid's ready for this and you know it. Now shape up. We've got a monster to catch," Banks finished, thrusting an unlit cigar between his lips and clenching onto it with his teeth. Standing behind his desk - in an all-too-familiar action that excused whoever was taking up his time - Banks waved the two men out of his office. He was only slightly worried that the men weren't speaking; his finest team usually shared a brain as far as he could tell. Shrugging his thoughts off, Banks watched as Sandburg and Ellison exited the Bullpen, listening to the well wishes of all the other Detectives as the men breezed through the office and out the main entrance to Major Crimes.

"Jesus, I hope the kid is ready for this," Simon muttered to himself once Sandburg and Ellison had exited the office. He didn't realize that Jim had heard him, en route to the elevators.

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"Chief," Jim started while they rode down in the elevator, "Uh, I think you should know that -" Blair gave him 'the look' once more, and Ellison sealed his lips. All he'd wanted to do was tell Sandburg what he'd heard Simon say, but he thought better of it and nodded at his Guide, trying to smile back when Blair gave him a shit-eating smirk and continued to - nervously - watch the floor numbers as they descended to the garage.

"Ready, Chief?" Ellison asked sharply as they got into the truck, wincing at the speed of his lover's heartbeat as they both buckled up.

"Ready as I'll ever be, man," Blair answered, and with that, Jim revved up the truck and they were off.

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It took all of Jim's self-control to not spill the knowledge that he held inside of their Captain's unease at Blair being sent out like a lamb to the slaughter, but he knew how important this case was to Sandburg. He resigned himself to refusing to allow his own doubts - OR those of their Captain - to interfere with Blair's mission, instead busying himself with making sure that he could still focus on his lover's respiratory and nervous reactions. It was the only way that he could let Sandburg out of his line of sight, extensive though it was.

It was nearly 7:00 PM by the time they reached their destination, and Jim swallowed harshly as he listened to Blair attempt the same - unable to do so because the younger man HAD no saliva. The click in his Guide's throat was nearly the Sentinel's undoing, but he clenched his jaw and reminded himself that this was Blair's show; he realized that if he attempted to put a stop to the operation at this point in time, that Sandburg would never forgive him. Instead of begging Blair to stay in the truck, Jim swallowed his last bit of doubt down and spoke to the man that he honored as his partner in ALL things in both of their lives. He'd only have this one chance to let Blair know how much he meant to him, and he'd be damned if he would waste it trying to tell his partner that he didn't feel that Sandburg was up to this particular case.

"Uh, Chief...I just wanted to tell you that I, uh...Christ Chief, I love you, okay? Be careful," Jim sputtered, closing his eyes as Blair scooted over next to him in the truck's cab and placed his right palm on Ellison's left cheek. Relishing the touch, Jim leaned into his Guide's touch, trying to soak up every bit of the scent and feel and emotion that he could; there was something nagging at the back of his Sentinel brain that he just couldn't seem to grasp...

"I love YOU, Jim," Blair murmured back, placing a chaste kiss on the same cheek that his hand released even as he reached for the door handle behind him. The drop-off point was a leather biker bar, Club Diablo, where the previous two victims had last been seen before their demise. The truck now sat idling in the alley behind the bar, and as Jim watched his lover hop out of the cab, he swallowed down the lump that had taken up residence in his throat. Blair turned around once more and gave a 'thumb's up' signal to his partner before entering the bar, and then he disappeared into the dark hallway of the establishment.

"Fuck," Jim Ellison spat as he put the truck into 'Reverse' and backed out of the alley. The Sentinel had been so focused on his Guide's vitals and exit from the safety of their vehicle...that he had failed to notice the third party watching, entranced, from the opposite side of the seemingly empty alley. Driving mere blocks up the street, Jim parked, shut off the engine, crossed his arms, focused in on his Guide's heartbeat once more - and did the only thing he could. He waited.

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"Yummy," the stranger in black groaned aloud. He licked his lips as he stroked himself through the black denim that encased his lower half. He'd seen the tight ass in the similar black jeans; the long, dark, curly hair; the ice-blue eyes as his prey had bid his friend a fond farewell. He sauntered out of his hiding place once the truck had disappeared from view and headed into the bar, following the newfound object of his affections. "Come to Papa," the stranger moaned, already certain that his newfound charge would be his tastiest yet, "Too bad the so-called Sentinel doesn't care for you like I will, darling..."

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WEDNESDAY NIGHT

CLUB DIABLO

Blair treated himself to a beer while he watched the small crowd in front of him. So far, it was nothing more than overweight biker wannabe's in black leather and their skanky-looking girlfriends, and Sandburg soon became bored with the so-called action in the club. Thankful that he was involved already with someone that had his whole heart, Blair tossed back the rest of his beer, surprised when he went to set the empty bottle on the bar and his hand was caught by that of a stranger.

"Hey," Sandburg said with a slight frown, his eyes lighting as he looked up and caught the similar indigo gaze of a man that could nearly have passed for James Ellison himself; were it not for the full head of somewhat spiky black hair and the scar running down his left cheek. Forgetting to pull his hand away, Blair smiled up at the stranger and breathed a sigh of relief when the man released his fingers and ordered both of them another drink. He hadn’t caught the wink that the stranger gave to the bartender, or the answering nod that cam in reply. Blair decided that this would be his last beer; he never drank more than one or two at home with Jim, and he WAS on duty, after all.

"Thanks," Sandburg said shyly, blushing even more when the man reached out with a calloused hand to stroke his right cheek, "I don't get out much."

"You should," the big man replied, forcing yet another blush from the younger man, "You're way too beautiful to hide yourself away." Blair smiled at the stranger, ignoring the unease that washed over him, and said, "Thanks, man. Hey, do you come here often? I mean...I didn't mean," Blair bit his lower lip quickly, the stranger reaching out and caressing it softly with his thumb, rescuing said lip from any further abuse by its owner's teeth. Shocked at the contact, Sandburg pulled quickly away from the touch - and missed the bartender dropping a small white tablet into his glass and mixing it in with the amber liquid.

Moments later, the bartender delivered the drinks, and Blair wondered if Jim could hear what was going on; there was no way that his meeting with this huge man was a coincidence. Sandburg found himself lost in meanderings of Sentinel Hearing and such when he was brought abruptly back into the 'here and now' by the feel of pressure in his groin area. "Hey, man, hold on a sec-" Blair said as he reached for his new drink, "Take it easy, okay?" Sandburg asked, and the big man pulled his wandering hand away, apologizing with a blush of his own as the offending extremity was shoved into a denim-encased front pocket.

"Sorry," the big man said as though ashamed, "You're just so...I couldn't help myself."

"Well TRY," Sandburg chided, taking a long drag off of his new drink with a grin plastered on his face. All he could imagine was Jim having a complete panic attack out in the truck, and that made his grin all the bigger; he'd show Mr.-Detective-Of-The-Year JUST how good a cop his partner REALLY was..."What's your name, anyway?" Blair asked the handsome stranger.

"Jim," the big man said with a half-smile.

Trying in vain to hide his shocked expression, Sandburg said, "No WAY, man! That's my…uh, my partner’s name," he continued, taking another long drag off his new drink and swaying a bit, "What are the odds, man?" Blair shook his head a little, wondering why his tongue felt like it was covered with fur all of a sudden, and why was he suddenly seeing two of this new Jim-person?

"I'd say, Mr. Sandburg, that the odds are most decisively NOT in your favor," the stranger said, taking the drink out of Sandburg's hand before it could fall to the floor. The stranger wrapped an arm around the younger man's shoulder and hustled them both out the back doors and into the alley. Blair was loaded into the backseat as the drug took full effect; his eyes were open, but he couldn’t move any of his limbs, and he found speech impossible. Sandburg couldn’t even cry out for help from his Sentinel as the evil-Jim buckled himself into the front seat and sped off into the darkness.

Laughing as he drove off with his newest prize, the stranger could only sneer at his genius; slipping a newly-developed drug into the drink that would keep the heartbeat at a normal pace...warding off all unwanted — and supposedly non-existent - Sentinels from saving the day - or the night.

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"Goddammit Sandburg," Jim murmured, having waited in the truck for two hours already - and with NO sign of anything out of the ordinary. He could still hear his Guide's heartbeat, perfectly timed and attuned to his own...only...wait just one fucking minute, Jim thought...it was receding. "BLAIR," Jim shouted to no one, turning on the flashing lights in the truck while he sat in his parking spot two blocks up from the club, trying to determine which direction his Guide was travelling in. Jim struggled to listen to his lover's signal despite the sound of the truck's engine. And the music from Club Diablo. And the other cars on the road. It only took two minutes for the Sentinel to Zone on the sounds of his Great City while he listened for Blair's heartbeat in a panic, unable to follow the only lead they'd been allowed in the entire investigation. Ellison had assured his lover that he’d be able to trace that beloved life-giving rhythm halfway around the world if he had to…

By the time Detective James Ellison came back to his senses, he glanced at his watch and realized that he'd sat there for more than an hour in useless limbo. "GODDAMMIT," Jim yelled as he pounded the steering wheel uselessly in frustration, struggling once more to pick up some sign of his partner-cum-lover-cum-Guide. Closing his eyes and using the dialing exercises his Guide had taught him, Jim took several deep breaths and blocked out all the noises of Cascade, one by one, until he was FINALLY able to pick out that one distinctive thump-thump. He peeled out of his parking space and zeroed in on the sound, trying to stay as calm as he could when he realized that the rhythm was not so steady any longer…

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LATE WEDNESDAY NIGHT

WATERFRONT WAREHOUSE

"Unnghhh," Sandburg moaned as he came to, wondering why he couldn't wipe his overly dry mouth with his hands...until he realized that his hands were cuffed together over his head, said cuffs conveniently strung over a water pipe directly above him, the spigot aimed down on his head. Once the realization of his predicament truly set in, Blair found himself on the balls of his feet, stripped down to nothing but his boxers, soaking wet and apparently entertaining company. As he took in his dimly-lit surroundings, the young detective realized that they must be somewhere near the waterfront; the floor was cracked concrete, and the walls were dilapidated, most of the windows painted black or broken completely out. A lone light bulb hung from the ceiling not far from where he was cuffed; hearing a shuffling sound, Blair’s head snapped back from his inspection to meet the icy gaze of the stranger from Club Diablo.

Evil-Jim stood before Sandburg, rubbing his hands together in apparent glee at his captive's current state, whispering, "Oh yeah, baby, you're all mine now...no fucking Sentinel's going to keep you from me." The stranger all but drooled as he took in Blair's appearance, circling the younger man like a shark ready to feed. A feral grin graced the man’s previously seemingly kind features.

Shivering, Blair found his words slurring as he begged, "Whathefuckyouwant? Lemmegoman…no such thing as…sentinelssss," his voice trailed off into the shadows that surrounded him. He began to shake harder when he heard the reply, "SSssssshh, sweetheart, you're with ME now, and I'm going to take SUCH good care of you. MUCH better care than that big bullying pig you pal around with."

Fingers clamped tightly around Sandburg’s throat, and he choked as his captor squeezed hard enough to leave fingerprints, "Come on sweetheart, I’m not going to hurt you - much," the Jim-Impersonator sneered. Groaning in his restraints, Blair didn't even realize that blood streamed down both of his arms from the tortured wrists above him; didn't understand that his Blessed Protector had lost contact with him almost an hour before. All Blair knew was that he hurt all over, and that Jim would certainly come blazing in with backup at any time. "Juh...Jim," Sandburg managed to whisper, only to wince and have his throat close up at the snarled, "I’m here, sweetheart," that met his plea.

"Shit," Blair whispered, the pain from his tightly cuffed wrists taking over his thoughts. He had no idea how long he’d been hanging, but his hands had already lost their feeling, and his arms and shoulders were cramped from supporting most of his weight. "Ssssshhhh," the stranger said softly, "It won't be long now, sweetheart," the man cooed as he threaded his large hands through Blair’s damp curly mane. "Just wait until you see what I’ve got in store for you," the man told him as he grabbed two fistfuls of curls and yanked Sandburg’s head back painfully. Blair cried out once in surprised hurt, but was quickly silenced as his captor removed his right hand and clenched it into a fist, then planted it solidly into the younger man’s left temple. Stars exploded in front of Blair’s eyes - illuminated everything for a brief moment — and then darkness seeped in.

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Blair Sandburg came to many minutes later, surprised to find his body shuddering uncontrollably - until he realized that the spigot over his head had been turned on, and had thoroughly drenched his nearly naked body in ice-cold water. Chilled to the bone, the young detective struggled in his bonds, frustrated that no feeling existed anywhere above his shoulders. He tried desperately to get a grip on his fear while he thought of the warmth of his Sentinel's body wrapped around his own - only to be rudely brought out of his reverie by a punch to the solar plexus that winded him instantly.

"Welcome back, you sexy thing," the evil-Jim cooed at him while Sandburg struggled to catch his breath, "I was worried there for a minute, Blair," the man finished.

Several moments passed while Blair caught his breath - and his bearings - and replied, "Huh-how do you fuh-fucking know me, man?"

"Why, you're practically famous, Blair," the man said, "I saw your press conference. Where's your fucking Sentinel now, hmmm? And if he really DID give a shit about you, wouldn't he be here by now? I mean, I watched him drop you off, Blair. I watched him drive up the street and park - so far away that he couldn't possibly see you if anything would happen to you. So where IS your saviour, you little fraud, you?"

"He'll be here," Blair said as he closed his eyes and prayed that Jim hadn't Zoned out listening for him, "You're toast, man."

The man in black feigned a shiver and laughed at his captive, "Ooohhh, I'm sooooo scared, Professor Sandburg - oh, wait, you never QUITE made that title, did you? I'm so sorry to dredge up bad karma for you, MAN," he mocked Blair as he finished. "I have an idea, Blair. While we're waiting for your big burly man to show up, why don't we play a little game, hmmm?"

"Fuck you," Blair spat, wincing as the larger man took yet another shot at his face, splitting his full lower lip and letting the blood drip freely down his chin.

"This game is called, 'Body Electric'. Do you know WHY I call it 'Body Electric', Blair?"

"Because you're some twisted throwback to 70's pop-culture?" Blair said sarcastically, trying to hold up as much testosterone-induced bravado as he could in his current situation.

The man ran out of the room briefly, practically skipping in his excitement. Blair shivered once more - even though the icy spray over his head had been shut off - as he watched his captor wheel in what appeared to be a hospital crash cart. 'Fuck', he thought to himself, 'Goddammit Jim, where the hell ARE you,' Blair repeated over and over in his head.

"Taaahh-Dahhh," the man nearly squealed with excitement as he showed his wares to the former anthropologist, "This is going to be so much fun, Blair baby. Just WAIT until you feel this. It's a real kick, man," the kidnaper sneered as he turned on several switches and dials, obviously priming the machine for its performance.

Evil-Jim produced two tiny clamps that looked like they belonged on the end of some tiny jumper cables and clasped one onto Blair's nipple ring, fastening the other onto the box on the cart. Sandburg twisted in his bonds uselessly, trying to shake off the clamp - to no avail. "Now, I realize that these look relatively harmless, Mr. Sandburg…but I can assure you, this is most definitely going to hurt YOU more than ME," the man said, backing up to the cart and watching Blair's face as he reached for the largest dial. "Say grilled cheese, sweet thing," the man said with a beaming smile, and Blair closed his eyes - only to have them flutter wide open involuntarily when the first volts hit his body.

Blair could almost feel every vein standing out from his skin as his teeth clacked together and his limbs thrummed with the force of electricity that surged through his body. He vibrated and shook helplessly, head lolling forwards and backwards against his will. He could smell the flesh burning at his wrists where the handcuffs dug in - turned into conductors themselves thanks to the criminal's foresight. The assault lasted no more than fifteen seconds, but it might as well have been fifteen hours as far as Sandburg was concerned. His body continued to convulse even when the unit had been powered down, and the only sound that greeted his ears was the raucous laughter of the man that had taken him from the safety of his partner.

Unable to voice his agony, Blair slumped in his bonds. He refused to give the freak any more enjoyment than was absolutely necessary - and he collapsed all-too-willingly when evil-Jim decided to impart yet another dose of electricity. Sandburg actually managed to hold onto consciousness long enough to hear the bastard snort in disappointment at losing his new toy so soon. "Where's your so-called Sentinel NOW," evil-Jim cooed at Blair's prone form, "Oh, wait a minute…I have another treat for you," the man snickered under his breath, "Something for BOTH of you to remember this occasion by. Now, this might hurt a bit," he warned his captive as he pulled a large knife out of his black leather coat, "Just hold still, sweetie…" he finished as he edged closer to Blair's drenched flesh, the blade glinting in the illumination from the light bulb overhead.

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LATE WEDNESDAY NIGHT

THE OLD WATERFRONT

"Hold on Chief, I’m coming," Ellison ground out angrily through clenched teeth as he drove along the darkened streets of the city, fingers clutched tightly around the steering wheel. He had to stop every so often to make sure that he was indeed headed in the right direction. Frustrated at the amount of time it took him - each stop - to focus all the unneeded sounds out, the Detective was reminded each agonizing time of exactly why this previously mundane Sentinel task had become so difficult this evening — and it angered him even further. By the time Jim could hear his Guide’s heartbeat regularly, without having to stop the truck, one more hour had passed…and his lover’s pulse appeared to have slowed, if it wasn’t Jim’s imagination.

"Goddammit, Blair…just hang on for me…come on baby, I’m almost there," Ellison murmured aloud, certain that he only had a few more blocks before he ditched the vehicle and covered the rest of the area on foot. He was nearly to the old waterfront district, and pleased that he had remembered to turn off his cellphone to quash any interruptions that might have occurred while he searched for his partner. Ten more minutes passed before the Sentinel parked the truck and hopped out, gun drawn. He piggy-backed hearing and sight, and found that he was closer to Sandburg than he’d realized; lips pulled tight in a grimace, Jim swept the area and followed the telltale thump-thump. The vise that had taken up residence in his gut tightened as he headed for one of the smaller buildings…he’d just happened to catch the tiniest flicker of light shining through a window several hundred yards ahead.

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"Fucking masterpiece," evil-Jim said vehemently as he finished his work, rubbing his forearm across his forehead to catch the perspiration before it could run into his eyes, "Goddammit boy, you really ARE a work of art now. Hope your pig likes it," he murmured to the silent young man in front of him. "No Sentinels my ass," he chuckled, wiping both sides of the soiled knife off on his black jeans and tucking it back into his coat before unhooking Blair's nipple ring from the cart and wheeling the contraption away. "I have to run now, sweetie," evil-Jim called as he left the room, "But I'm sure your big boyfriend will find you soon, if he truly is what you said," the maniac finished.

"HOLD IT RIGHT THERE, MOTHER FUCKER," Jim yelled as he entered the warehouse, pleased that his sight had enabled him to locate the perp so quickly, yet sickened by the overwhelming scent of his Guide's blood. "Don't FUCKING MOVE," Ellison bellowed, daring the stranger to move a millimeter so he could simply take him out with an all-too-easy shot; the man stopped where he stood, the cart carrying Sandburg's torture tools directly in front of him. Jim refused to allow himself a glance at his partner/lover/Guide's form, realizing that it would most definitely distract him to the point of losing the son of a bitch currently in his line of sight.

"You really ARE a Sentinel, aren't you, Ellison?" The man said calmly, "Sandburg really wasn't lying, was he? Of COURSE," evil-Jim spat matter-of-factly, "He gave up his life's work to free YOU, didn't he? Brilliant. I never would have imagined that our Sandburg was so…so dick-whipped," the man sneered, and Jim felt his trigger finger tighten on his weapon.

"Yes," the stranger continued, buying himself time that Jim didn't really want to allow him; especially since the scent of his injured Guide was forcing its way into every pore of his being, "Detective of the fucking Year Ellison…what is it, three years running now?" The perp snorted.

"Four years, after I take you down, you fucking bastard," Jim growled, following the public's newly dubbed Cascade Strangler as he strode across the room and proceeded to grab Blair's hair and pull the young man's head back…revealing his handiwork on the young man's flesh. Jim found himself gasping for air as he took in the letters carved diagonally across his lover's chest. F - R - A - U - D. Each letter dripped a bright red trail down Sandburg's stomach, stopping only when each met the waistband of the light gray silk boxers that Jim had purchased for his lover mere days earlier.

The perp pulled his knife from his jacket once more, but it was the last act that he would ever perform - as the REAL Jim put a bullet between his cold black eyes. The Sentinel watched with grim satisfaction as Blair's tormentor dropped unceremoniously to the floor, dead before he hit the cracked concrete. It took a couple of seconds for Jim to realize what had just happened; once he regained all of his senses, he fled to Blair's side, shooting the cuffs free with a single shot. Ellison caught his lover's body in mid-drop, cradling the younger man to his chest and rocking him gently with one strong arm as he used the other to call 9-1-1. "Officer down," Jim started, finishing up with the location as best as he could describe it - he hadn't caught the actual address in his hurry to reach his Guide.

The Sentinel dropped his cellphone to the ground, connection still live in case the operators had to trace his signal, and focused all of his attention on his unconscious partner. He used his index finger to gently push some stray damp curls out of Blair's closed eyes, the lump in his throat growing as he realized that aside from his Guide's heartbeat, he could pick up the tiny vibrations that still coursed through the younger man's body from his electrocution. The muscles and nerves continued to twitch - unnoticed by anything other than a Sentinel's sensitive touch - and Jim spoke quietly and calmly to Blair despite the rage that ate away at his insides as he spared one more split second glance at the dead man mere feet away.

"Chief," Ellison murmured, bending down so he could place a tender kiss on his Guide's forehead. It was the only part of his face that wasn't swollen or beginning to bruise; his lower lip was puffed up to almost twice its normal size, and Jim shuddered as he took in the shallow but horrifyingly bloody wounds across his lover's chest. "Jesus Christ…Sandburg, come on, baby. I've got you now, it's alright, lover. No one is going to hurt you anymore," he practically cooed. He shifted his position so that he could rest Blair's unresponsive body across his muscular legs for a moment, just long enough to pull off his own leather coat and wrap it tenderly around his partner's bare shoulders. He gathered Blair up in his arms once more and held him close, trying to channel all of his body heat into that of his now-visibly shivering Guide.

"I love you, Darwin," Jim said as a tear rolled down his cheek, "Come on sweetheart, just hang in there for me, okay? Everything's gonna' be okay…the ambulance is on its way," the Sentinel assured the bruised but still beautiful man in his arms, then rested his lips against the top of the young man's head. As he heard the sirens approaching, Jim wondered if his murmurings were more to comfort his unhearing Guide or himself.

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TWO HOURS LATER

CASCADE GENERAL HOSPITAL

Jim waited in the lounge, as he had so many times before, and as he undoubtedly would again. He had turned his cellphone back on once he'd reached the Emergency Room, directly behind the ambulance carrying his lover, and it rang to life immediately. Simon Banks had called with the good news that the strangler had been caught earlier, on a total fluke, by Rafe and Brown - only to be given the news of Detective Sandburg's condition.

Simon Banks entered the waiting room to find one-half of his prized team hunched over in a plastic chair, elbows resting on his knees, face resting in his cupped hands. "Jim," the Captain said gruffly, "How is he?" Jim slowly raised his head and shrugged his shoulders, stretching as he stood up. "He's still in with the doctors, sir," Ellison replied, "Should be out anytime now to let me know how he is."

"Jesus, Jim. I'm sorry. The kid was just so damn excited about this," Banks said, wincing a bit as he caught Jim's hurt expression, "What happened?"

"Fucking bastard got ahold of him at Club Diablo during the stakeout. I lost track of him, Captain. I Zoned trying to follow him-" Jim's voice cut out abruptly as he noticed the doctor walking through the doors that kept him from Blair.

"Detective Ellison?" The doctor inquired as he approached with a hand extended for shaking. Jim nodded grimly to the physician and shook the offered hand, dark blue eyes searching the doctor's face for any sign of bad news…or good news…hell, ANY news at all on his Guide. His partner. His lover. His other fucking half.

"I’m Doctor Murphy. Your partner was admitted a couple of hours ago after an attack?" The doctor nodded at Simon, and Banks nodded back, shaking the once again outstretched hand and introducing himself quietly.

"How is he," Jim asked impatiently, trying to remain relatively pleasant when all he really wanted to do was grab the man by his shoulders and shake the information out of him.

"He's going to be fine, Detective," Doctor Murphy answered, but Jim noticed a slight twitch in the physician's eye as he spoke, "He's got a concussion, and abrasions and contusions on various parts of his body - aside from the major one across his chest. We've stitched him back up, and he should be waking any moment now."

"Can I see him, please?" Ellison asked, in as strong a voice as he could muster despite the helplessness he felt inside at having been - yet again - too late to keep his Guide from harm.

"Absolutely. He's being wheeled up to a private room as we speak. Uh, Detective, there's something that I wanted to talk to you about regarding his injuries," Murphy said, glancing at Simon as though to indicate that it was a private matter. Banks was no idiot; he knew when his welcome had been worn out, and he nodded once to Jim before he pulled a cigar out of his coat pocket and headed for the courtyard to light up his much-needed fix.

Ellison watched as Simon lit his stogie, then let his gaze settle once more on the serious man in front of him, "It's the carving, isn't it," Jim said, closing his eyes as soon as he heard the Doctor's affirmative reply.

"Mr. Sandburg may require some plastic surgery to remove the - uh - word scrawled across his torso. We did the best we could, but it's very difficult to gage the damage until he's fully healed," Murphy explained. "In addition, there has been some severe tissue damage to his wrists, as well as his left nipple. The flesh in both places was severely scorched when the assailant applied his -" the Doctor was thankful for Jim's interruption; he'd never seen anything quite like the injuries the young man in his care had come in with.

"FINE," Jim growled, not wanting to picture the scenario all over again, "I get the point, Doctor Murphy. We'll take care of all of that as soon as Blair's well enough to think it over and make a decision. In the meantime, I'd really like to see my partner, if it's alright," Jim said through clenched teeth. He saw the physician flinch; Jim hadn't meant to make the man uncomfortable, but just thinking about what his Guide had been through was enough to make his hands clench into fists of their own volition.

"Of course," Murphy replied hurriedly, "Follow me, Detective." Murphy led the way to Blair's room, and within minutes, Jim had settled himself into a chair that had been several feet away from the bed - only after having dragged said chair right next to Sandburg's bedside. "I’m sure you know the drill, Detective, but if you or Mr. Sandburg need anything, just call the Nurse's Station," Murphy said before closing the door behind him on his way out.

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"Hey Chief," Jim said with a voice just above a whisper, leaning down so that he could be closer to Sandburg's ear, "You made it, buddy. You're in the hospital, and I'm here. I'm with you, Chief," he continued, noticing the slight increase in his Guide's pulse even before the machines registered it. "I love you, Blair Sandburg," he continued, watching with newly formed tears in his eyes as his lover's eyelids fluttered more quickly with each word his Sentinel spoke, "And I'm not going to lose you again. Can you hear me, Blair? I love you more than anything, and I promise - I promise to never let anyone do anything like this to you ever again," Jim murmured vehemently.

Ellison reached out and took Sandburg's hand gently in his own large paw, caressing the too-pale flesh with his thumb, nearly jumping out of his seat when he felt a slight pressure return the touch. The Sentinel was speechless as he watched his Guide's adam's apple bob in his throat. Heard the clicking sounds of his lover trying to swallow. Felt the slight increase in pressure on his hand as he tried not to clutch Blair's hand too tightly in his own.

"Sandburg," Jim whispered, practically shocked as his partner's eyes fluttered once, then again, before finally opening. It took several seconds before the younger man could focus, but when he did, his light blue eyes met Jim's deep indigo gaze, and Ellison gasped with the emotion that clenched his heart as he watched his lover wake.

"Jim," Blair whispered hoarsely, a slight smile fighting to make its presence known on his swollen lips as he gazed up at his partner with nothing less than pure adoration gracing his tortured features.

"Blair," Jim whispered back, emotion stealing his voice from him, "Oh Christ, Chief," Ellison said aloud, letting the tears of relief stray from his eyes. The Sentinel's heart clenched as his Guide reached up and caught a single salty drop with his still-weak thumb, pausing for a moment before closing his eyes and whispering back, "Don't cry, Jim. I'm okay, man."

"Chief," Ellison managed, his whisper strangled in his throat despite his best attempt at not letting Blair see him upset. "Oh God, Blair," Jim continued, "I thought I'd lost you…I love you so fucking much, baby," he finished, kissing his partner's left hand - the one NOT hooked up to an IV drip and countless monitors.

"Hey man," Blair groaned, his eyes closing with the effort of speech, waiting to make sure that his Sentinel heard him before he dared continue.

"Yeah?" Ellison replied, placing his partner's left palm over his own fully-clothed chest so that the younger man could feel the heart that beat only for him.

"Have I told you lately," Blair gasped, "That I love you?" He finished with great effort, closing his eyes as Jim broke down beside him with heart-wrenching sobs that would have melted the coldest of hearts in mere seconds.

The Sentinel clutched his Guide's hand even closer to his strong chest, willing the younger man to drink of the strength that emulated with each beat of his Blessed Protector's heart. "Yeah, babe, yeah," Ellison replied brokenly but hopefully, "You have."

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The End. Sorry. I got schmoopy. Didn't mean to…the muse made me do it.

Hope you liked it. ---Jvantheterrible

P. S. I COULD make this a series…if you all liked it enough. Let me know. Feedback to jvadesignage@aol.com. No flames, thanks. It's HOT here in the Sonoran Desert…