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Tum Dhakkano Ke Bheje Hue
SMS:
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- Dear Subscriber, All your incoming SMS on ur mobile that
contains joke on Sardar will be charged Rs10 per SMS as their
Mental Development Fund.
Sender: Manmohan Singh.
- Congress Government has announced that Sardarji jokes will
be Banned. Because they will telecast them LIVE from
Parliament! (Contributed by Harbir Paaji)
- On first night husband said 2 his wife: Look darling
before marriage I had slept with 10 girls.
Wife replied: Jab kundli mili hai to goon to milenge hi
na! (Contributed by Rajesh)
- Two unborn twins in their mother's womb saw a penis. 1st
unborn: Dekh papa aa rahe hai
2nd unborn: abe chutiye woh JuNeD uncle hai, papa to SMS padh
rahe hain.
- Apke sar pe sing hai kya?
Check it
Make sure
No?
R U Sure?
pakka?
Sir par hath laga ke dekha?
Never mind. Gadhon ke bhi nahi hote! (Contributed by
Imran Hashmi)
- A judge charged Rs 540 fine to an accused of Rape. When
asked why Rs 540 Judge replied: Rs 500 for rape and 8%
Entertainment Tax! (Contributed by Imran Hashmi)
- Main tumko yaar aaunga, tum mujhe yaad aaoge, meri tasveer
le jaana mohabbat mein kaam aayegi,
apni tasveer de jaana, bachho ko daraane ke kaam
aayegi. (Contributed by Momcy)
- 1980's: Friends remember U during good times and forget U
during bad times...
2004: Friends remember U when SMS is free and forget U when
SMS is charged.
(Contributed by Mihir)
- Man goes 2 a hotel where only ladies r waiters. He orders
milk. Waitress opens bra shows her tits n asks him 2 suck. Man
says: Thank God! I didn't ask 4 water!!!
- Machhar ne apko kaata wo uska junun tha,
Apne khuja liya usme apka sukun tha,
Chah kar bhi apne usse nahi maara,
kyun ki uski ragon me bhi apka khoon tha! (Contributed
by Dinkar)
- Manmohan ji ki priority:
1)All sardar jokes r 2 b Banned
2)12 nahi bajenge. 11 ke baad 1 bajega.
3)Bolo tara ra ra will be the national anthem! (By
Yours Truly)
- 10+10=Bees, le mere lund ki Kiss
Bis+Bis=Chalis, kar mere lund ki maalish
Chalis+Chalis=Assi, pee mere lund ki lassi
Assi+Assi=Ekso Saath, Le mera lund chat. (Gross msg
from Imran Hashmi)
- Sachha DESHPREMI kaun hai?
The one sitting on an English Toilet in INDIAN STYLE!!
(Contributed by Dinkar)
- Kore kagaj pe likha hai tera naam...
tasvir bhi utaari hai, aur likha hai ye paigam.....
ZINDA YA MURDA PAKADNE WALE KO RS 1000 INAAM!
(Contributed by Momcy)
- 3 good manners of male penis.
1) Courteous- it stands before performing.
2) Emotional- it cries during the performance.
3) Polite- it bows down after the performance.
(Contributed by Max)
- Met a gorgeous whore today. Says she charges by the Inch.
I can't afford her, but she'd be a cheap fuck for
you...!! (Contributed by Mihir)
- Bar-Bapor ni loo cho tame, dosti na naam par thu cho tame,
hu su kahu su cho tame?
dhoyeli gand par chotelu ghu cho tame!! (Contributed by
Max)
- When I was sad U were there, When I was heart broken U
were there, When I was financially down U were there. Maa
Kasam Bahot Badi Panauti Hai Tu!! (Contributed by
Momcy)
- Manmohan Singh sits on top of a mountain and studies..
When a journalist asked what was he doing.. He replies: Higher
Studies! (Contributed by Momcy)
- Woh aaye meri kabar pe, chal diye moot ke, chalo isi
bahane darshan hogaye chut ke, badi thi uski chut pan bhenchod
ab kya fayda jab hum ban gaye bhoot! (Contributed by
Momcy)
- Chaho to dil se hamko mita dena, chaho to hamko bhula
dena, par yeh wada karo ki, aaye kabhi yaad hamari to rona
mat... GAND MEIN UNGLI DALKE HILA LENA.. (Contributed
by Momcy)
- Do U know that pregnant Sardarnis are often referred to as
with 'ISI' Mark. Strange na!!!
Dont laugh as 'ISI' means 'Idiot Sardar Inside'.
(Contributed by Imran Hashmi)
- What did Ramu say when he saw a surgical glove?
Shyam lagta to condom hai par Draupadi ke zamane ka
hai!! (Contributed by Momcy)
- Munna ratko sota nahi tha... Maa boli "Munna soja nahi to
Gabbar aajayega"..
Munna bola: Rs. 5 de nahi to papa ko bol dunga ratko roj
GABBAR aata hai.. (Contributed by Adnan)
- Once Manmohan went to a party with his family n introduced
them to his friends saying... I am Sardar n this is Sardarnee,
this is my kid n that is my Kidney...!! (Contributed by
Momcy)
- Arz kiya hai... Dheere se thoko sanam, mehangai ka zamana
hai...
6 inch ke item ko zindagi bhar chalaana hai..!!
(Contributed by Momcy)
- High Tech Manmohan Inventions!
1. Waterproof Towel.
2. Solar Powered Torch.
3. Book on how 2 read!
4. Pedal powered Wheel Chair! (Contributed by Momcy)
- Jaise- Lohe ko loha kaatata hai, sone ko sona kaatata hai,
zeher ko zeher kaatata hai, heere ko heera kaatata hai....
Waise hee... Ek din tumhe kutta kaategaa! (Contributed
by Anand)
- Manmohan Singhji bachpan se hi heraan, pareshaan aur full
tension mein ye socha karte theh ki "Meri bahen ke do bhai
phir mera ek hi bhai kyon?? (Contributed by Momcy)
- Question: How do U confuse Manmohan Singh?
Answer: Put him in round room and tell him to sit in
corner!! (Contributed by Momcy)
- Laloo went 2 USA 2 learn English. After 3 months Rabdi
Devi calls Bush to ask, if Laloo is learning English. Bush
replied: E susara kabhi angreji nahi sikh sakta!
(Contributed by Jennifer)
- Manmohan Singh is repeatedly buying movie tickets. Finally
the ticket seller asks him why?
Our PM says: Koi us darwaze ke pas meri ticket faad deta
hai!! (Contributed by Zuber)
- Last night I had a dream.. I was walking along the beach
with GOD.. I asked him 'Why i've a friend like U'... God
replied: Sab pichle janmo ka paap hai!! (Contributed
by Momcy)
- Man is born through a hole, When he grows up he searches
for holes, When he dies he is buried in a hole.
That's why his nick name is ASSHOLE!! (Contributed by
Momcy)
- What is life after all? Take a girl behind the wall,
Remove her protection, show ur projection, fix the connection,
pour the solution, enjoy the situation. (Contributed by
Adnan)
- Love making cricket style = Remove covers. Fiddle with
points, Stretch fine legs, Take out short leg put it into deep
gully, Start Batting... (Contributed by Imran Hashmi)
- Teri dosti bahot pyari isme koi shak nahi, teri dosti
sabse pyari isme koi shak nahi, par sabne teri gand mari kya
mera koi haq nahi? (Contributed by Momcy)
- A Poet seeing Qutub Minar - Aye Qutub kya kahoon teri
shann mein, Aye Qutub kya kahoon teri shann mein... Aisa lagta
hai jaise dharti ka lund ghus raha ho aasmaan ki gand mein!
(Contributed by Momcy)
- Three things I LIKE about YOU
1._____
2._____
3._____
Arrey yaar kuch to acha kiya hota zindagi mein!
(Contributed by Jennifer)
- After finishing MBBS... Dr Munna Bhai starts his practice.
He checked his FIRST patient's eyes, tongue & ears by TORCH &
finally what did he say?
"Battery is OK" (Contributed by Imran Hashmi)
- Woman: Doctor, I got brown discharge at my vagina. Is it
infection?
Doctor: How often do u have sex?
Woman: about once a month
Doctor: Its not infection, its rust! (Contributed by
Jennifer)
- A prostitute after taking Sardar's dick in her mouth: Rs
1000 de varna isko kaat dungi!
Sardarji: Rs 5000 de varna su su kar dunga! (Contributed
by Imran Hashmi)
- Its obvious that animals are smarter than humans. Put 8
horses in a race & 20,000 people will go to see it. But put 8
people in a race & not 1 horse will go to see it.
(Contributed by Imran Hashmi)
- Sardar ki jhang jal gayi. Doctor ne BURNOL aur VIAGRA likh
ke di. Sardar: Burnol to samjha par viagra kyon? Doctor:
Blanket uncha rahega! (Contributed by SamDev)
- Man to salesman: ye kachhe ki kya gurantee hai?
Salesman: Tum 12 floor ki building se jump karo, gand fategi
lekin yeh kachha nahi!
- Hello! Sorry to bother you! I am your mobile. Just wanted
to get out of your pocket! The smell next to your balls was
unbearable! I think your dick is dead! (Contributed by
Cyrus)
- Shadi ke baad aadmi ki halat uss pinjre ke bandar ki tarah
hai, jo gulati to maar sakta hai par chadne ke liye ek hi ped
hota hai! (Contributed by Mihir)
- Musharraf got kidnapped and 100 Million demanded or they
will burn him.
Please donate for the good cause. I have donated 25 leters of
Kerosene!
- How do you embarass an archeologist?
Give him a used WHISPER and ask him to find which PERIOD it
belongs to!! (Contributed by Momcy)
- SMS ka sangrah karke kya payega vats? Balance ka moh chhod
aur SMS kar... Mitro se sampark banaye rakhne me hi Swarg ki
prapti hai...
- Swami JuNeDanand Messageacharya
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*Disclaimer*
This is my sincere effort to make people laugh. 'Coz I believe
Laughter is the Best Medicine.
The SMS which are there at the moment in my site are meant to
have a good laugh and it is not directly aimed at any Individual
or Community. And do help me make this site better by giving a
regular feedback at +91 9825008042
and posting in your valuable SMS at
SMSbhai@on.to I will post it on the website on it's
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*Dis ka
claimer*
*Jin chutiyo ko yeh angrezi mein likha samaj nahi aaya unke
liye neeche desi mein likha hai*
Woh kya hai na bhedu, apun logo ko hasaane ki koshish kar
rahela hai. Bole toh, hasi to chehre par hona ich maangta!
Lekin yeh sab jo SMS apun ne daalela hai woh kisi par AIM nahi
kiyela hai.
O Paaji, tu samaj rahela hai na, ki baara baj gaye?
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