Chapter 11
Now that he was here, Kevin was
scared to death. His attorneys advised him against handling this in person, but
he felt he had to. He couldn’t turn this over to a total stranger.
Mac had given him Jeanie’s hotel
and room number. He unfolded the papers. There were yellow sticky notes, sign
here or sign there. Pages upon pages of legal mumbo-jumbo. Even HE didn't
understand it, but was assured by his attorneys that it was fair.
He would simply tell her that he
loved her. He was sorry that he’d let her and Madi down, give her the divorce
papers and leave.
Neither one of them could ever get
on with life until they quit living for each other. He needed to cut her loose.
She deserved a life and deserved happiness. He owed Jeanie that much.
*****
It was the first night in a long,
long time that Jeanie actually slept. There were no nightmares of Kevin or the
baby, just peaceful, much-needed sleep. Perhaps it was because Nick held her
all night and she felt safe or perhaps it was because for the first time since
Kevin left she opened her heart and actually talked about what had happened.
It was sometime in the early
predawn hours. Nick was half-dozing and Jeanie was affectionately stroking his
hair as he slept.
“Nick…about tonight…”
His eyes fluttered and he mumbled,
“What? Nothing happened, right?” He rolled over to face her. “Jeanie… Look…you
want to forget this happened, I understand. You want to tell the world…I’d
understand. What I won’t do, is go back on my word to you. I told you I
wouldn’t tell anyone and I won’t. So don’t worry about that. Okay?” He wrapped
his arms around her.
“Thank you,” she whispered as he
reigned her in.
“Can I ask you a question though?”
“I may not answer, but you can
ask…” she gently teased as she burrowed into his strong embrace.
“You still love Kev?” He could
feel her immediately tense up. She was silent for so long, he was beginning to
think she wasn’t kidding. Eventually, she did answer him and when she did it
was in the form of anguished, embittered tears.
“I’m sorry,” she apologized as she
tried to regain control. “Nick…” Her voice was pensive and despondent. “I hurt
so bad, sometimes I think the pain will kill me. It’s Kevin…it’s the baby…it’s
everything,” she broke down again.
“The baby? Madi?”
“No…” she wept.
“Are you pregnant?”
“No, not anymore…” He pulled back
to look at her. She was absolutely grief-stricken, crying almost inconsolably.
“Kevin doesn’t know?” Nick drew
her tightly against him. “Shh, it’s gonna be okay…somehow.” Unfortunately, he
wasn’t sure how.
“How could I tell him? If I did
and he came home, I would always wonder if he was there because of pity. What
was I supposed to do? Nick, nobody and I mean nobody knows the heartache I went
through when I was alone and pregnant with Madi. Even after he KNEW I was
pregnant, he wouldn’t commit to us.”
“Jeanie…I’m sorry.” Nick’s blue
eyes welled with tears.
“Me too, Nick. I don’t know what
to do. I don’t want to love him. I want to be mad. I’m hurt. I’m humiliated. He
waltzed into my life, turned it upside down and walked out and left me alone to
straighten it all out…” Despite all the pent-up emotion and grief, no anger
registered in her voice…just lonely despair. Nick felt like his heart was
breaking just holding her.
“You know, you never answered me…”
he kissed her forehead and hugged her again.
“Nick, I have all this love…for
him,” she had to stop for a moment, “…I am so full of love for Kevin that I
don't even know what to do with it all…”
Nick and the other guys had been
furious with Kevin before, but now Nick wanted to kick his ass around the
block. He knew he wouldn’t and couldn’t, but he wished he could.
Eventually, Jeanie cried herself
to sleep. He wouldn’t let her escape his embrace. It’s all he knew to do…
*****
It was sometime around eleven when
the phone rang. Nick finally had to let her up to answer the phone.
“What? Are you serious,” Jeanie
fought desperately to wake up. Nick groaned and pulled a pillow tightly over
his head. “Okay…let me get a shower. I’ll be there in thirty minutes.”
She sat stunned, holding the
receiver in her hand, she wasn’t even aware that Nick was massaging her lower
back and talking to her.
“Is everything okay?” He sat up
and kissed her shoulder.
“Yeah. We need to get over to the
bungalow.” She headed toward the bathroom.
“Did something happen?”
“It’s A.J. and Lindsay…they’re
getting married tonight.”
*****
Kevin stood just outside in the
hall. He was about to knock when Nick opened the door. The two men stood silent
for a minute.
“What are you doing here?” Kevin
asked quietly.
Nick was stunned. The last person
he expected to run into was Kevin. He wouldn't break his promise to Jeanie...
“Nothing. Lindsay asked me to
check on her, that’s all. She overslept and everybody got worried.” Before he
could ask Kevin what HE was doing there, Jeanie came to the door.
No words were exchanged as Kevin
and Jeanie’s soulful gazes met. Finally, Kevin broke their silence. “I need to
give this to you. You…” he had to look away for moment to get the courage to
continue. “Um, you don’t have to sign this right now, just read it and let
Karen look at it.”
As soon as Kevin mentioned her
attorney, Karen, Jeanie panicked, terrified he was going to try and take
Madison from her. She tore open the envelope. Nick, visibly uncomfortable,
walked away, trying desperately to give them privacy.
She quickly scanned the first page
then the next…then began flipping through the large document. “These are
divorce papers?” Jeanie couldn’t believe what she was reading.
“I’m sorry. I…” Kevin forgot his
rehearsed speech. He didn’t know what to say as the harsh reality of what he
was doing washed over them both.
That strength or “inner fire” as
Mac put it, was never more apparent than that foggy Saturday morning. With as
much quiet dignity as she could muster, Jeanie walked to the desk and sat down.
She calmly began signing and initialing. Nick’s jaw dropped, he couldn’t
believe what he was witnessing. Tears inched down Kevin’s cheeks.
When she was finished, she folded
the papers back up and walked to where Kevin remained standing just inside the
door.
“Don’t you want to read this
first…” he whispered.
Jeanie looked at him. She studied
his facial features. Even at his worst, he was handsome. She’d often wondered
how they would age…together.
For their all-too-short time
together, there had been good times. Most of them were tiny treasures disguised
as simple everyday activities. Stupid little things that were now precious
memories like chasing Kevin through the house with one of Madi’s dirty
diapers…silly, silly memories.
She held her hand to his cheek and
brushed his tears away. “I don’t need to read it…” she whispered. “I trust
you…I’ve always trusted you.”