In the afternoon, Josh and I watched Chance and Larissa while my parents, aunt, and uncle went out for some last minute shopping and Jason and Lucy took a short nap.
That night, though, I decided I was going to go walk on the beach. I kinda wanted to be alone. I had things to think about. It was weird, being back with my family, having everything basically back to normal. I was sitting on the shore, sifting my hands through the sand when someone came up behind me.
“Josh?” I asked.
“Yeah. I thought you could use some company. I know you said you wanted to be alone, but you kinda looked like you had some things on your mind.”
“I'm just thinking about some things.”
He sat down next to me and took my hand, inconspicuously. “Like what?”
“I dunno…Justin, my parents, Daniel, stuff like that.”
“You miss Justin?”
“Surprisingly, not as much as I would’ve expected. I kinda like being away from him, though I don’t want him knowing that. Lately, like I said, he’s been acting weird. So, it’s nice to be away from that, to finally be happy again. Being here with you is bringing my spirits up.” I got up and started to walk around in circles around him. The water came up over my feet and I screamed. “Omigosh, that’s cold!”
“Well, then don’t walk in it!” He got up and ran over to me with a devilish look in his eyes.
“What are you doing?” I asked.
“Oh, nothing…”
I stood on my tiptoes, pressing my forehead against his. “I don’t believe you.”
“Sounds like a personal problem.” As he said that, he put his hands on my waist and picked me up. He turned me around and put me on his shoulders and just ran around the beach. He ran towards the water, like he was gonna throw me in it, but turned away right before he reached the water’s edge.
“Joshua Daniel Hartnett, put me down right now!” I practically screamed.
“Oh fine.” He reached up and slowly brought me back to the ground. We reached for each other’s hands and walked along the shore for a while, not really talking about anything in particular.
A little ways down the beach, there was this mountain of rocks that stood right at the end of my parents’ beach property. A few of the rocks jutted out over the ocean, so I ran to the rocks and climbed to a spot I had seen that would be perfect for sitting and staring out at the ocean. Josh ran behind me to the bottom of the rock mountain, and while I was climbing up, he constantly warned me to be careful.
Once I had made it safely, he followed me and sat behind me, putting one leg on either side of me. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me close to him. We sat there quietly for the longest time, just staring at the ocean, the only sound was the waves crashing against the rocks below us.
“Holly!” someone suddenly called, around midnight. I turned around and saw Jason standing on the beach below us.
“What?!” I called back.
“Your mom says you better get inside now. She said it’s too cold for y’all to be out here!”
“But I don’t wanna go inside! I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself, plus I'm wearing a jacket!”
“Just do what she says, please. She’ll have a fit if you don’t.”
“Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine!” Josh and I climbed back down to the beach. This time, both Josh and Jason were telling me repeatedly to be careful. Josh even held my hand the whole way down, and when I was close enough, Jason grabbed my waist and brought me safely to the ground.
“Jason! Quit worrying about me, you’ve been worrying about me ever since…well, forever! And you, Josh! Calm down. I’m not made of glass.” I tossed one arm over each of their shoulders. “Ya know I love you both, but c’mon!”
We walked back to the guesthouse quietly. It hit me as we were walking up the stairs to the yard just how tired I was. I said goodnight to Jason and Josh, then quickly got ready to go to bed. I fell asleep quickly, and luckily, I had a dreamless night’s sleep.
Christmas morning came and went quickly. Everyone except Josh and I exchanged gifts. I had his gift waiting back in the guesthouse. I wanted to give it to him while we were alone. We ate an early Christmas Dinner…I guess it was a Christmas Lunch. Josh and I had to be at the airport at 4:30, so we could fly out to Minnesota. Josh and I ate quickly, then excused ourselves so we could go pack up the rest of our things.
“Hey, Josh!” I called from the bedroom. “Could you come here a sec?”
“Yup, be right there.”
He appeared in the doorway a few seconds later, his hand behind his back. “Whatcha got back there?” I asked.
“Oh, nothing…What did you want?”
“Umm, I wanted to give you your Christmas present. It’s not much, but, here!” I handed him a photo album. It wasn't wrapped because I hadn't had enough time to get it together and wrap it before we left.
“What’s this?”
“It’s a photo album, duh! Open it!” I said excitedly. He opened it, and his eyes went wide. “They’re pictures from the movie set. Ava was visiting a while back, and she brought those, and I thought they were so awesome.” He stopped at one and started laughing. I looked over and started laughing, too. “Do you remember that one? When Ava snuck into the room took a picture right when you jumped over and started tickling me!”
“God, we had so much fun there!” he said quietly.
“Yeah, we did…”
“Oh! I got you something, too! Here!” he handed me two small boxes that were wrapped, one in silver paper with a red bow, and the other in green paper with a gold bow.
“Josh, you didn’t have to!”
“I know, I know, just open them!”
I smiled and tore the paper off of them. The boxes were both from James Avery, the jewelry store. Inside one was a small charm with two linked hearts. Inside the other was a little Christmas tree, with Holly & Josh 2001 engraved on it.
“They’re for your charm bracelet.”
“Omigosh, these are so pretty! Thank you! Oh, Merry Christmas!” I leapt across the bed and hugged him tight.
“Merry Christmas,” he said. I finally let him go and he got up. “I'm all done packing, so I think I'm gonna take a shower before we go, k?”
“Ok. Lemme just get my hair things out of there so I can finish packing.” I quickly got my stuff out, and let him go in.
After a minute, I heard the guesthouse door open. “Hello?” I called out.
“Hey Shorty, its Jas!”
“Oh, hey, I'm in the bedroom.” He came in and sat down on the bed. “Hey, what’s up?”
“Nothin’. Where’s Josh?”
“He’s in the shower, why?”
“No reason. Look, I gotta talk to you. Last night, when you came inside, Josh and I stayed outside and talked for a while.”
“About what?” I asked, sitting next to him.
“You. Holly, I'm gonna get straight to the point, he really cares about you, ok? I don’t know who Justin is, or what's going on with you, but from what he said, it seems like you’re kinda turning to Josh for some romance or something. It may not seem like that to you, it may just seem like a friendship…But from what I saw last night, from how you two were acting on the beach, and from how y’all are always cuddling, or holding hands, or whatever, it seems like you’re leading him on.” I looked away, not wanting to hear this. I knew in the back of my mind how I was acting with Josh, and Jason was right, I was turning to Josh when things got bad with Justin. “Holly, listen to me. You can’t do that. You can’t mess with a guy’s feelings like that. It’s gonna get you in trouble; someone’s gonna get hurt. And I really don’t want to see you hurt again, or Josh or Justin, for that matter.”
“Jason, you listen to me. Josh and I are just friends. He knows that and I know that. We’re just close. We act like that around each other because we’re so close. He knows there’s nothing more than friendship between us and that there will never be, as long as I'm with Justin, at least. I'm glad that you’re still as concerned about my well being as you ever were, but I'm a big girl. I can handle myself.” I kissed him on the cheek. “Now go or move outta my way! I have some major packing to do.”
About an hour later, Josh and I were standing by my car, saying goodbye to everyone. I was cradling Larissa in one arm and Chance in the other.
“You know you’re never gonna get them back now, right?” Josh asked Jason as they shook hands.
“Oh yes I will, right Shorty?” he asked.
“It depends. You can have them back if you promise to bring the whole family down to Orlando and visit me a lot!”
“It’s a deal!” I reluctantly gave him the babies back and gave everyone hugs. Jason was the last person I hugged. I didn’t want to let go of him. After two years of not seeing him, he was still my best friend in the entire world, and I knew I would miss him so much.
“Bye Jason, bye Lucy! Bye Momma, bye Daddy! I love you!” I called out my car window as we drove away.
We flew out to Minnesota for a couple of days. We stayed at his house with his dad, step-mom, brothers, Jake and Joe, and his sister, Jessica. I stayed in Jessica’s room with her, while Josh stayed with Jake, and Joe slept in his own room.
Jessica was pretty cool. We talked a lot every night before we went to sleep. I think she almost had a heart attack when I told her I was going out with Justin Timberlake, so I was forced to talk about Justin for a while, giving her every detail of how we met and how we got together.
The time in Minnesota was basically uneventful. I met his family, we had a great time, and then we left.
We flew into LA on New Year’s Eve. His mom met us at the airport. She took us to her house, we dropped off our stuff, and barely had time to change before she whisked us off to a party she had been invited to.
Josh didn’t know anyone there, so we just stayed off by ourselves, talking. Until my cell phone rang.
I quickly made my way outside, and answered it. “Hello?”
“Happy New Years, baby! I wish you were here, so we could kiss, but *muah*,” Justin said, making a kissing noise into the phone.
“Happy New Years to you, too, Justin!” I said, letting Josh know who had called.
“Where are you, anyway?” Justin asked.
“Umm, at a party.”
“Where?”
“In…LA,” said quietly.
“LA?!” he screamed. “What the hell are you doing in LA?” he demanded.
“I came out here with a friend. But, we’re leaving…not tomorrow, but the next day, and I just gotta make a stop at the airport in Connecticut, ‘cause I left my car there, and then I’ll be home!” I said, trying to get his mind off the fact that I wasn't where I had told him I would be.
“Whatever, Hol. I’ll let you get back to your party. I guess I’ll see you later, then. Bye.” He hung up before I could reply, yet again.
“Ugh, sometimes…” I said to myself.
“What happened?” Josh asked.
“Nothing out of the ordinary for Justin. I don’t know what it is, but lately, he’s been acting so weird.” Josh and I sat outside and talked about it for a long time, I guess it was about 3 and a half hours, because the next thing I knew, Josh looked and his watch and said it was five minutes until midnight.
He took my hand and led me through the crowd. He stopped in the middle of the large crowd gathered together, ready to count down to 2002.
“5!…4!…3!…2!…1! Happy New Year!” the crowd yelled.
I smiled and turned to Josh. “Happy-“
His mouth crushed down over mine and Josh pulled me as close as he could. I hesitantly gave in and kissed him back. We kissed until I felt like people were staring at us, so I opened my eyes and realized every eye in the room was focused on us, then I pushed him away.
“That’s Josh Hartnett,” I heard people whispering. “Who’s that girl he’s with?” Whispers filled the room, and I became scared to death. I was scared of the media finding out what had just happened and it somehow getting back to Justin.
“I have to go,” I whispered, then turned and ran outside. I saw some taxis waiting by the curbside, so I ran to one and began to climb in.
“Holly! Wait!” Josh yelled as he ran up to the taxi. He got in and shut the door.
“What?” I asked, almost in tears.
“Where are you going? Why’d you leave?”
“I'm going home. Give the driver directions to your mom’s house, please.”
He quickly told the man where to go, then turned back to me. “Why are you going home?”
“Why did you kiss me?! I think that’s a better question.” He stared at me for a minute, completely silent. “Well…?”
“Holly, I think I'm falling for you.”
“Josh…no. You know I'm with Justin. You know we’re just friends, please don’t do this.”
“Don’t do what? Holly, I can’t help it. Break up with Justin; be with me, please. I need you, I can’t stand not being around you. I want us to be together…please…” We pulled up in front of his mom’s house at that moment.
“Thank you,” I said to the taxi driver. “I still need to go to the airport. Could you please wait just a few minutes?” The driver nodded his head, so I got out and ran up to the door. “Let me in,” I said to Josh, who had followed me.
“Don’t leave,” he countered.
“Josh, please. If you don’t let me in, I’ll just leave without my stuff. So, you have to let me go either way. Just don’t make this harder than it has to be.” He sighed and unlocked the door. I pushed it open, grabbed my things out of the foyer, and walked back outside.
Josh reached out and took hold of my hand, trying to keep me from leaving. I snatched my hand away, and looked him in the eye. “I’m sorry.”
I ran back out to the taxi. I flew back to Connecticut, picked up my car, and then drove back to Orlando, where I arrived the next day.
When I got back to Orlando, I drove to Justin’s house, and saw that he wasn't home. I knew they had been flown back to Orlando the day before, New Year’s Day, and I knew they had a meeting with Johnny today at WEG. So, I dropped off my things, then drove to WEG quickly. I ran inside and directly to the TV room; Melinda was practically asleep on the couch.
“Meli?” I called from the doorway. She opened her eyes, and when it registered who I was, she jumped up and ran over to me.
“Holly! What are you doing here?” she asked, hugging me. “Justin came in this morning yelling something about how you were in LA for a while.”
“Yeah, but I missed him. I missed all of y’all, so I came back early. I wanna surprise him. Where is he?” I asked, looking around.
“They’re still in the meeting with Johnny. They’re discussing the new tour, so it might be a while. But Kel, Hannah, and Jordan are all in the toy room with Brianna, so you can go hang out with them for awhile.”
I thanked her and went down the hall further and into the toy room. Kelly was sitting on the floor next to her and Joey’s daughter, Brianna. Hannah and Jordan were sitting at a small table, obviously made for a child, in the corner of the room.
Brianna spotted me first, giggled, and pointed at me. The other three turned and saw me. Hannah jumped up and ran over to me, hugging me.
“Holly! You’re back early!” she squealed.
“Yep, two weeks away from you guys was too much. I missed you!”
“J is gonna be so surprised to see you!” Kelly said. “He came in this morning ranting and raving about you being in LA without him. Two seconds later, he was depressed and refused to move off the couch, he just kept saying he wanted you to come home.”
“It was the saddest thing I've ever seen in my life,” Jordan said.
I giggled at her fake sympathy. “Aww, poor baby. Well, I'm here now, so…”
We all sat around and played with Brianna for an hour or so. We had a tea party with her, then we colored pictures, and Kelly read her a story to get her to sleep for her nap.
“Hey Meli,” Hannah whispered when Melinda walked into the room. “What’s up?”
“The guys are out of the meeting. They’re in the TV room,” she whispered in response.
“Goody!” I said in a stage whisper, so as not to wake up Brianna.
We all filed out of the room, and I was the last person. The girls all walked nonchalantly into the room, and stayed in the doorway. JC spotted me first and smiled at me. He elbowed Justin in the ribs and motioned towards the doorway and me.
Justin glanced over and did a double take. “Holly?!” He jumped up and ran over to me, hugging me tightly. “What are you doing here?”
“I missed you too much.” He smiled at me and kissed me; it was the deepest, most loving kiss I had ever experienced from Justin.
“Holly, thank you for coming back,” JC said. “I think we were all about ready to kill Justin for moping around all the time.”
“Oh, my poor baby,” I said, and kissed Justin’s nose.
“Hey C, are we done here for today?” Justin asked. He moved behind me, wrapped his arms around my waist, and put his head on my shoulder.
“Yeah, go home, you two.”
“Thanks Jayce, bye guys!” I called. Justin led me out of the building, his arm around my waist. He started to lead me to his car, but I stopped. “Ok, you’re gonna have to let go now. I'm not leaving my car here over night, and I'm not getting up early tomorrow to bring you here. I’ll see you when we get home.”
“Hey, c’mere,” Justin said. He took one of my hands in his, and brought me closer to him, kissing me like crazy and running his fingers through my hair. He finally let me go, kissed my forehead, and watched me as I walked to my car and drove off.
I pulled into the driveway and saw that Justin had beat me home. I ran inside, excited to see him again, although it had only been a few minutes since I had seen him last.
“Just, where are you?” I called as I walked in the door.
“I'm in the kitchen!” I ran into the kitchen and saw him running around like a crazy person. “What are you doing?”
“’Member our first date?” he asked.
“Of course!” I jumped up onto the counter and sat there, staring at him as he started cooking.
“I'm gonna make you dinner again.”
“Such a sweetie.”
He walked over to me and placed his forehead against mine. His finger traced the chain my heart pendant was hanging on. “Have I told you how much I love you lately?”
“Uh…nope! How much?”
“More than you’ll ever know.”
“What brought on this sudden change of attitude?” I asked him when he kissed me and walked away to cook dinner. “I mean, before I left, you were completely distant and seemed to want nothing to do with me.”
“I know, I'm so sorry! It’s just I had so much stress from work and I was so frustrated, I kept myself buried in my work so I could get it done then have time to spend with you. I'm really sorry.”
I blew him a kiss to show him he was forgiven. He finished cooking dinner, spaghetti, what else? He still hadn't learned how to make anything else. We sat at the table and had a nice, quiet, candlelit dinner.
“Justy?” I asked as we were drying dishes and putting them away.
“Yep?”
“Let’s take a vacation!”
“A vacation? Sounds nice.”
“Take me to New York City! Please! I’ve never been before, and I wanna go ice skating, like I always see in movies and stuff.”
“I don’t know…”
“Please Baby, I wanna go so bad! I wanna go somewhere just me and you.”
“I’ll think about it. I’ll ask Johnny tomorrow and let you know.” I kissed him on the cheek, put the last dish away and walked out of the room, expecting him to follow me.
“Hey, Hol? I think I'm gonna go downstairs and do some writing and stuff, ok?”
“Oh, J, come upstairs with me. Let’s have some you and me time. We’ll watch a movie, and cuddle on the bed. I wanna watch a scary movie, but I can’t watch one by myself.”
“Why not?”
“’Cause then I won’t have a big, strong man to comfort me when it gets real scary.” I pouted out my bottom lip, and when I saw he still wasn't convinced, I gave a little whimper.
“Alright, alright! C’mon.” He walked to the bottom of the stairs, where I was standing, picked me up and carried me upstairs. We fell asleep in each other’s arms.
The next morning, I woke up and found a note taped to the bathroom mirror.
Hey Baby, well, I talked to Johnny early this morning and he said we’re not busy
next week, so you better make plans quick…WE’RE GOING TO NYC! Love you, Justin
I smiled to myself. Justin and I were going to finally get some time to ourselves, and hopefully that time would help me forget that some of the things Josh had told me made me feel things for him that I really shouldn’t have.
