Honey, I love you, but bite me. -- Dharma
"Welcome to the Pompous Room. May I check madame's pole, or will she be keeping it up her butt?"-Dharma
"It's just like riding a bike, except the bike has fun, too..."--Dharma
"Practical? Honey, do you remember who you married?" -- Dharma
There is nothing my dad likes better than experimental furniture.- Greg
Dharma, I love your family very much. But my father is going to bludgeon your father to death with a brick, and I'm going to let him.- Greg
"Since when are you a Trekkie?"
"I'm not, I just like middle aged guys who are
virgins." -- Dharma and Greg
"I've never driven a school bus."
"It's fun! It's like driving an ice cream truck,
but we don't sell drugs." -Dharma and Greg
Listen to this crap. "Labor pains hurt because
our brain doesn't know how to listen to our uterus. So set aside some time
each day to dialog with your uterus, your cervix, and yes, your vagina."
That the new Harry Potter? -Dharma and Greg
Do you like the color.
Doesn't matter, I'm going to cover it with glitter.
-Dharma and Greg
Dharma: Are you drunk?
Greg: I'm wearing stretch pants and chasing a
urine soaked towel through the woods. I'm hammered and I highly recommend
it.
Kitty: What are you doing with my horse?
Dharma: Pretending we are lesbian Canadian mounties.
Jane: We take turns on top.
Dharma: One time when I was babysitting your
monkey, I took him to a fancy party without telling you.
Jane Deaux: Is that where he started smoking
again?
Dharma: MmmHmm...
Jane Deaux: Do you know how hard it is to get
a nicotine patch to stick to a monkey?
Kitty: Come Edward, there's someone I'd like you
to meet.
Edward: I hope his name is Johnny Walker.
Kitty: It's the archbishop.
Edward: I hope it's Archbishop Johnny Walker.
"Larry, what's the name of your dealer?"
"He's in jail."
"I meant your car dealer."
"Same guy." -- Dharma and Larry