10%

“My hope is that gays will be running the world, because then there would be no more war. Just a greater emphasis on military apparel."
-Roseanne Barr

Gay Liberation? I ain't against it, it's just that there's nothing in it for me.
-Bette Davis

Capital punishment turns the state into a murderer. But imprisonment turns the state into a gay dungeon-master.
-Jesse Jackson

I've had enough of being a gay icon! I've had enough of all this hard work, because, since I came out, I keep getting all these parts, and my career's taken off.
-Ian McKellan

Rock Hudson let his gay agent marry him off to his secretary because he didn't want people to get the right idea.
-Anthony Perkins

I'm a very recent convert to the gay scene.
-Matt Lucas

Marriage hasn't been my thing. But gay people, knock yourselves out!
-Ben Affleck

I think I've lost a lot of my gay fans to Gavin Henson. It's a shame as I really love them.
-David Beckham

Gay people are the sweetest, kindest, most artistic, warmest and most thoughtful people in the world. And since the beginning of time all they've ever been is kicked.
-Little Richard

"Drag is dirty work, but someone has to do it."
-Charles Pierce

"Is a gay play a play that has sex with other plays?"
-Harvey Fierstein

"Gay cowboys are now the new penguins."
- Susan Wloszczyna, USA TODAY

"I heard he had a huge gay following, it had better happen to me too!"
David Tennant says about Christopher Eccleston:

"President Bush is likely torn because he has to protect what he sees as a sacred institution and yet he knows gay marriage would boost the economy because you know those gay guys would go all out. We're talking about designer wedding cakes, $20,000 sleeveless tuxedos, giant naked man ice sculptures that pee mojitos. They'd hire Pattie La Belle as the band, give out African parrots as party favors. It'd be ridiculous. Remember, whatever your political beliefs, a vote to allow gay marriage is a vote for a fabulous economy."
-Tina Fey

[on being offered 'Cannibal' roles after My Best Friends Wedding]Perhaps, they think, 'He played that gay part, let's see what else he will eat.'
-- Rupert Everett

If you want to get the girl, tell them you're gay. That's my advice.
-- Sir Ian McKellen

Kevin is my homosexual crush. If I were gay, the first guy I would sleep with is Kevin Smith. The second one would be Leo DiCaprio - but only for the long hair he had in The Man in the Iron Mask.
-- Ben Affleck

The real malice isn't in pointing out that someone homosexual is a homosexual, but in pretending that such people don't - or even worse - shouldn't exist.
-- Johnny Depp

Women are the only reason I'm not gay.
-- Noah Wyle

One reason I became an actor was because I heard you could meet queers in the theatre.
-- Sir Ian McKellen

They're all like, 'Dude, you're gonna kiss a guy?' But it's not about that for me. It's about how impossible love can be sometimes and I can relate to that. I grew up in a family where many of our close friends were gay couples. As well as that, every man goes through a period of thinking they're attracted to another guy.
-- Jake Gyllenhaal

My only regret in life is that none of my children are gay.
-- Sharon Osbourne

[on misconceptions of women who think he's gay] For them it's a challenge. They want to be the one to turn me around. I let them.
-- Kevin Spacey

'Be a Man' tape: Repeat after me: Yo!
Howard Brackett: Yo!
'Be a Man' tape: Hot damn!
Howard Brackett: Hot damn!
'Be a Man' tape: What a fabulous window treatment!
Howard Brackett: What a fab...
'Be a Man' tape: That was a trick!
In and Out

Oh, how can I put this delicately? It's just that I'm not really in the vagina business.
-Peter, Peter's Friends

"If God dislikes gays so much, how come he picked Michelangelo, a known homosexual, to paint the Sistine Chapel ceiling while assigning Anita Bryant to go on television and push orange juice? "
-Mike Royko

"When asked, 'Shall I tell my mother I'm gay?', I reply, 'Never tell your mother anything.'"
-Quentin Crisp

"I'm not really a homosexual. I just help them out when they're busy."
Frank Carson

"If we put all the crazy people in straight jackets, what should we put all the straight people in?"
— Rex Rivers

"We need to recognize that a Government that would to deny a gay man the right to Bridal registry is a Facist dick..."
-Margaret Cho

"I am not gay, but I respect the rights of gays and lesbians. It's not their fault if God makes them born like that."
— King Norodom Sihanouk of Cambodia,
 81-year-old father of 14

"Believe me, Bob, these days gentlemen are an endangered species. Unlike bloody drag queens who just keep breeding like rabbits.."
-Bernadette
Priscilla, Queen of the Desert

"Why hasn't anybody done a gay-related children's movie? Well, there was that Christmas picture 'Prancer' that sounded promising, but it didn't really deliver. Come on, gay people have more children than Catholics these days. Who's gonna exploit their kids? A whole new generation of sexual question marks. We could have 'Spidermary,' 'Star Wars: Attack of the Castro Street Clones.' Both would work."
- John Waters

When it comes to exploring the sea of love, I prefer buoys.
-Andrew G. Dehel

"The decision by the New Hampshire Episcopalians to elect an openly gay bishop is an affront to Christians everywhere. I am just thankful that the Anglican Church’s founder, Henry VIII, and his wife Catherine of Aragon, his wife Anne Boleyn, his wife Jane Seymour, his wife Anne of Cleves, his wife Catherine Howard and his wife Catherine Parr are no longer here to suffer through this assault on our 'traditional Christian marriage.'"
-Robert M. Aronin

"He pressed his forehead against mine, clasped me round the waist, and said that henceforth we were married... Thus, then, in our hearts' honeymoon, lay I and Queequeg - a cosy, loving pair."
-Ishmael
Moby Dick

"I came out to my family on Thanksgiving. I said, mom, please pass the gravy to a homosexual. She passed it to my father. A terrible scene ensued."
- Bob Smith,
American comedian and writer

"I came out to my sister, and she said, 'Oh my god, you're gay! Are you seeing a psychologist?' I answered, 'No, I'm seeing a schoolteacher.'"
- Bob Smith

"In college I experimented with heterosexuality. I slept with a straight guy. I was really drunk."
- Bob Smith

I don't know, darling - he never sucked my cock.
- -Tallulah Bankhead,
when asked if Montgomery Clift was gay.

Does it really matter what these affectionate people do-- so long as they don’t do it in the streets and frighten the horses!
Mrs. Patrick Campbell

"I'm an openly gay trailer-trash Mexican. How could they not love me?"
--Ice-skating national champion Rudy Galindo

"The gay label doesn't really bother me, as long as it's just not something that is restrictive. I just don't think one should live one's life as a gay man. I don't think that sexuality necessarily implies a life style package that comes with it."
--The Pet Shop Boys' Neil Tennant

"Am I gay? Well, bend over and let's find out!"
-George Carlin

"Before Pat Robertson determined queers were simply willful, difficult children, the religious right, with the loving collaboration of quack head shrinkers,explained homosexuality like this: people are seduced or molested into the homosexual lifestyle by predatory homosexuals, who were themselves molested into it at one time; and once molested, new homosexuals go out at night to prey on other innocents, bring them over to the dark side, yadda, yadda, yadda -- making homosexuality sound like, well, vampirism, if anything. 'I vant to suck your dick! I vant to do your hair! I vant to buy light-colored socks with a subtle yet distinctive pattern!' Spooky, isn't it?"
                        -Syndicated columnist Dan Savage.

"Most times, the only gay or lesbian face people know of is who they see in the pride parade. To judge us on that would be like judging heterosexuals after watching Mardi Gras."
                        -Candace Gingrich, former House Speaker Newt Gingrich's lesbian sister, to the BaltimoreAlternative.

                        "If homosexuality is a disease, let's all call in queer to work: "Hello. Can't work today, still queer.""
-Robin Tyler

                        "I'd rather be black than gay because when you're black you don't have to tell your mother."
-Charles Pierce

 'You could move.'
-Abigail Van Buren, "Dear Abby," In response to a reader who complained that a gay couple was moving in across the street and wanted to know what he could do to improve the quality of the neighborhood.

"The one bonus of not lifting the ban on gays in the military is that the next time the government mandates a draft we can all declare homosexuality instead of running off to Canada."
-Lorne Bloch

"My lesbianism is an act of Christian charity. All those women out there praying for a man, and I'm giving them my share."
-Rita Mae Brown

"Soldiers who are not afraid of guns, bombs, capture, torture or death say they are afraid of homosexuals.Clearly we should not be used as soldiers; we should be used as weapons."
-Letter to the Editor, The Advocate

 "You don't have to be straight to be in the military;you just have to be able to shoot straight."
-Barry Goldwater

                        "Why is it that, as a culture, we are more comfortable seeing two men holding guns than holding hands?"
-Ernest Gaines

"My own belief is that there is hardly anyone whose sexual life, if it were broadcast, would not fill the world at large with surprise and horror."
-W.Somerset Maugham

"Drag is when a man wears everything a lesbian won't."
-Unknown

                        "If male homosexuals are called "gay," then female homosexuals should be called "ecstatic.""
-Shelly Roberts

"My mother took me to a psychiatrist when I was fifteen because she thought I was a latent homosexual. There was nothing latent about it."
-Amanda Bearse

"It always seemed to me a bit pointless to disapprove of homosexuality. It's like disapproving of rain."
-Francis Maude

"The only queer people are those who don't love anybody."
-Rita Mae Brown

"Practising? Certainly not. I'm perfect."
- QUENTIN CRISP, in response to a U.S. immigration officer's question as to whether he was a "practising homosexual", quoted in the Sunday Times, 20 January 1982

"I'm hard to come by, like a straight guy working at Starbuck's."
-Jimmy Pop Ali

"Iron Chef Fellatio! Iron Chef Frottage! Iron Chef Anal Intercourse! Take your places!"
Spike, Battle Flower Bud (Iron Chef Slash)

"My cousin is an agoraphobic homosexual, which makes it kind of hard for him to come out of the closet."
- Bill Kelly

"The Bible contains six admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to heterosexuals. That doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals. It's just that they need more supervision."
-Lynn Lavner

"Did you hear about the Scottish drag queen?  He wore pants."
-Lynn Lavner

"I'm forty, I'm single and I work in musical theater--you do the math."
-Nathan Lane

"Homosexuality is God's way of insuring that the truly gifted aren't burdened with children."
-Sam Austin

"81% of gay sons can create drop dead birthday bouquets for their mom in hues that complement her eyes and the living room."
-Karen Rauch and Jeff Fessler
Why Gay Guys are A Girl's Best Friend

"Never thought I'd see the day an openly gay man was being given away with hamburgers."
--Amistead Maupin (talking about Ian McKellen on a Burger King glass.)

 "Admits to 'including hints of homoeroticism' in the final series of Due South. He is quoted as saying that his new
                              co-star Callum Keith Rennie was "incredibly sexy and that the new series would be very homoerotic."
-interview with Paul Gross

"I'm more tongue-in-cheek than a lesbian orgy..."
-Jimmy Pop Ali

"We all know a fag is a homosexual gentleman who has just left the room."
- Truman Capote

"Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon-I thought that was something Seigfried and Roy did on vacation."
     -Steve Martin
 
 

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