PILOT:You liked Yves with a beard, didn't ya, Melvin?
What was that quote? Oh, yeah, "Trust me, no guy kisses like that."
Thank you.
BOND, JIMMY BOND:First of all let's talk about the phone call from Yves. When
Frohike yells at the blind football players that they're crushing his pelvis, what's
her first thought? "Are you talking to Byers? Should I call back?" Yikes! My fave slash
bit was all about Langly and his apparent fling with Alex, though. What did Byers say: "He
was thinking with his heart, not his head." Aww...
EINE, KLEINE, FROHIKE: Byers checks out Jimmy's goosebumps just a little too
long, more teasing about Langly's girly hair, and, oddest of all, the
song that plays while Frohike is getting into his disguise is a German rendition of
Jet Boy Jet Girl, by Elton Montello, the chorus of which goes a little like this:
"Jet boy, jet girl, gonna take you round the world, jet boy I'm gonna make it penetrate
I'm gonna make you be a girl, ooh ooh ooh ooh, he gave me head" Kinda makes ya wonder,
don't it?
LIKE WATER FOR OCTANE:"Typing is for secretaries." Nice dad, Ringo, no wonder you
rebelled. Byers watches Jimmy carrying the cinderblock box just a little too long,
Langly just happens to know that Yves lipstick is "Ferrari red" AND he fists a bull. Did I mention
that it's all about "Anal Slide" brand lube (now in the convenient  caulking gun size-y'hear that,
Fox!), and Jimmy in an undershirt, crying and declaring "If you pound something long enough, it'll give"
THREE MEN AND A SMOKING DIAPER: Some guy trying to make an afghan out of Melvin-
not the dog, the blanket! Jimmy's concept of Deep Throat-like he's that innocent...okay,
maybe he is. Of course we can't forget the Senator's 'angina', can we, or Frohike's
tasteful nipplewear! Loved when the boys were bonding with the baby at the end...
MADAM, I'M ADAM: We won't even mention Marv's "it takes a little lady to get me off big!"
line, which isn't so much slashy as just plain dirty. Love that Langly takes it on the chin so much
in this ep, but, drumroll please..."MY NIPPLES HURT" When Frohike woke up in
Jimmy's arms, slashers round the world went wild!!!!
PLANET OF THE FROHIKES: Langly can be so girly sometimes, and what's with
paraphrasing Gone With The Wind? I think "Dr. Asslips" liked having Jimmy in a
cage, and don't even get me started on a name like "Potent-Loins"
MAXIMUM BYERS:"He's my bitch!" yells Jimmy-he sure is! Even though Byers
was totally having a moment or ten with his buddy in the infirmary, it's all about him
and the big guy, who knows just when he needs a hug! How sweet was that ending?
DIAGNOSIS JIMMY: What is it with the guy-bringing-flowers-to-a-guy thing that CC really likes?
And candy, too! Loved Byers super fey Gentle Ben story-it is all about wrapping your arms around
a thick neck, isn't it John? And don't even get me started on Ringo, who makes Jack MacFarlane look
butch some days! Very sweet the way they huddled together for warmth in the van...
TANGO DE LOS PISTOLEROS: Dean, Bruce and Tom all had to take dance lessons
for this episode-what does that tell you? Despite the fact that it really was all about Jimmy in dancing pants,
and Langly in rubber, the slash pay off was Langly doing his Flashdance interpretation, or Langly
doing his girly scream, or Langly running like a girl, or Langly...you get the point. Last thought, I'd
love to know what El Lobo did to that woman to make her call him a bitch!
THE LYING GAME: I wasn't sure whether this was an episode of the Lone Gunmen, or Queer As Folk-
Melvin and John's bedroom scene was too sweet! Jimmy cried for his guys, gave up his car for them, and
dressed as Skinner to save them. It was all about the Pileggi-sized hug at the end, and Walter growling "Don't
call me Walt," which might not have been too slashy, but it sure was sexy! Slashiest line: "Sure enough, Skinner
was goin' to a secret meeting with his mystery man." Good call Jimmy, but we all know Mulder is Skinner's mystery man...
THE CAP'N TOBY SHOW: This ep aired late, and was all about the Cap'n Toby show, Langly's favorite show as a kid. He was so sweet in this ep, not necessarily any queenier than usual, but pretty fey nonetheless. I think it was all about Jimmy making the guys breakfast and complaining about being neglected ("Glad I'm not married to you three."), and then the poisoning scene-OMG-quick, Jimmy, suck out this poison! And Yves summed it up so well: "I think Frohike owes you one." Very funny and slashy ep.
ALL ABOUT YVES:Where do I start? With Melvin in a housecoat purring "Hello, lover."? Or Langly's uberbutch display after the paint wouldn't come off: "Don't even!" Or Morris baiting Langly: "The boys wouldn't call you a tramp if you wore less makeup." or "Bite me!" "Why, do you taste like blueberries?" Okay, you're right, it was ALL about what Fox Jimmy knew (fox2001-just like Jack 2001, only gayer!). It is a May/December thing, Fox, although my good friend Jon pointed out that the carpark scene wasn't so much a set up as it was a meeting of Bottoms anonymous! Cruisetastic, and where did Mulder's hands wind up? Guess Jimmy got him all hot with his probe talk!!

Remember, even Goddesses are fallible, so if I've missed a bit that just screamed nelly to you, drop me a note and let me know!