Much like this tweet, my life only has room for 140 characters. You...are the metaphorical 141st. Sorry. #CanadaWrites

You've been tweeting through this whole meal, so this is the best way to tell you (and the "why") it's not working. Goodbye. #Canadawrites

#CanadaWrites It's said all good things must come to an end. It's never said they're the only things that do. We're done.

#CanadaWrites - Slamming on the brakes when you've already run out of gas. Why would someone do that? And yet, I have to send this tweet.

#CanadaWrites Our love is like a newly-beheaded chicken: it's dead, but doesn't realize it. Also, horrifying to normal observers. #WeAreDone

#CanadaWrites We're through. Take heart, though: the fact I'm doing this via Twitter shows that you can really do a lot better. #VisibleJerk

#CanadaWrites If the story of our love were on TV, it would be on Fox. On Friday nights. Loyal fans, great writing, and yet...#Cancelled.

#CanadaWrites - Our love story *is* like Titanic - I've grown cold, you've gotten old, the whole thing is stupid, and I just want to leave.

#CanadaWrites - when I said I'd treat you like a Queen, I meant more like Anne Boleyn. In that I am seeing someone else and want a divorce.

#CanadaWrites Our love=Elvis. At first, exciting w/ lots of hip movement. Then, sad & tired. Now, only fools believe it's still alive. #done

#CanadaWrites Our love=the Beatles. Years of beautiful music, all over now. And people will probably blame the split on my new girlfriend.

#CanadaWrites - You had me at "Hello". You lost me at "your 2 funny". #HomonymDealbreakers

#CanadaWrites Warning: the following things have changed: Lately, my feelings. Today, the locks. Your stuff's in the carport. #WeAreDone

#CanadaWrites You've lived in my heart for so long...but I kind of want to turn it into more of a condo complex. Or a Sorority house. Sorry.

In Marvin Gaye terms, we're a bit less "Let's Get It On" and more "Here, My Dear". #CanadaWrites

Honey...we need to tweet. #CanadaWrites #Dumpsville #WeAllKnowWhatThisMeans

Remember how you were all, "how could nobody tell Liberace was gay"? Turns out you're bad at this game too, sweetie. #Awkward. #CanadaWrites

#CanadaWrites - remember how we couldn't agree on where to go for vacation? Compromise achieved! Also, you have to move out now
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This tweet is my "Freebird" - all of the dumping you; a mere fraction of the time. #CanadaWrites #IAmAHorriblePersonInside

#CanadaWrites - To look into your eyes right now would make the necessary an impossibility. Forgive me. Forget me. Goodbye.

#CanadaWrites - did you get the message I asked M.I.A. to give you during the Superbowl? It's subtle, but I think you'll decode it. #GoAway

#CanadaWrites - you've taught me so much about love. Now, much like school, I'm leaving you to apply that knowledge elsewhere.

They say breaking up is hard to do, but this message is short, and so, very easy. Don't be a stranger. #CanadaWrites

Look, we *could* try to fix things now, but the older I get, the harder it's going to be to land a 20 year old. So...yeah. #CanadaWrites

I've got the moves like Jagger, all right. 1) Love 'em. 2) Leave 'em. Am I clear on this, "Bianca"? #CanadaWrites

Parting is such Tweet Sorrow. #CanadaWrites #ThePunBadEnoughToBeDumpedFor?

You know how you're always calling me immature? Well, I'm taking my toys and going home. For good. Nyah. #Doodyhead #CanadaWrites