I  is for IF.
If is a dangerous word. It can lead to all sorts of shoulda-coulda-woulda crap that makes you feel like you have let some one down, even yourself, cos you didn't get it right, do it now, fix it up, all exactly right this second. If I'd only known...if I could have changed it....if you don't know.....if only, I wonder if....
If is an excellent word, because it can bring together elements in a way that can bring about fundamental change, or maybe just a shift in the direction of life, away from the bleak, dark and frightening, to the light. If I work hard, I'll get that raise. If you brew it, they will come *L* If I'm good enough, I'll be loved. Cause and effect. And if that's all it takes, then those two little letters are welcome in my life anytime....if they dare! :)