Boost... ew. My doctor touts "It even comes in Butter Pecan!" I respond "does it come in pastrami? No? Then, shut up." Yes, I'm bitter, but am glad I'm no longer living in a world of pain. I"m just in a state of pain, and I'm the governor.
"Yeah, I'd stalk the X-Files guys. Not in a 'jump out of the bushes
with duct tape and shove you in the back of my old van' kind of way. More
like a 'let me bump into the waiter carrying a tray of cream pies so they
fall on your clothes and I get to wipe whipped cream off your crotch while
my best friend takes pictures' kind of way."
"When X-Files Fans Attack"
"I love being 'Goddess Endorsed', too. Makes me feel like a natural woman!"
"Yeah, I get all goofy, and my Rock'em!Sock'em!Skinner clone is forced to don a french maid costume and dust my collection of Star Trek figurines while singing William Shatner's version of "Proud Mary". Won't you save a clone from this awful fate?"
"If you don't write faster, I'm going to...yeah,
I'll start writing Doggett/Kersh slash, and I tell you, it won't be pretty.
Lots of BDSM, leashes, watersports, and an occasional visit by BurnedToACrisp!Well-Manicured
Man, and YeahI'mSmokingThroughAHoleInMyThroat!CSM, both in glittery g-strings,
working at a strip club. I'll throw in a Enigmatic!Scully and Rosemary'sBaby!William,
as Kersh's new family."
head of the
fan club *L*
"Honey, the Ten Commandments is not slashy. That's just how the Ancient
Egyptians dressed."
"Tomato, To-mah-to. I spy slash, baby. Pharoah's ogling Moses' muscles,
Moses is all over Rameses...and isn't he aptly named?"
Why Lyrical Soul is
banned from ever watching the Ten Commandments again.
Me: The answer is Snow White!
Twin#1: You're wrong again, Mommy. It's
Cinderella.
Me: Whatever. Mulder says a broken clock
is right 730 times a year.
Twin#2: Mommy, no one looks at a broken
clock because it's not plugged in.
Twin#1: Silly mommy! Mulder's gone anyway.
Pick a card.
playing Disney Trivial Pursuit with her daughters
"I just sigh, and realize the Zen of the X-files is wasted on the young."
Little Girl#1: Mommy, the arm on my gingerbread man came off!
Little Girl#2: Aw, you can still eat it. Just pretend it's Krycek.
"I view the world through two types of glasses: Slash and Psycho. Sometimes
those worlds collide."
having a discussion with a Het!XF writer on why Mulder
should jump
out of Walter's closet during a Het!Walter sex
scene.