Masquerade~a Poem

With added philosophies and new ways of thinking for woman in abusive or unhappy relationships~ from bydiana

As she plucks your love from a star,

you hide from her,

a misty image,

too far away to really see.

Why do you hide your self away,

is it in hopes of her discovering,

the path you have secretly laid her way?

Is it her Love you hope to claim,

or the image of a couple in your mind,

you need to sustain?

An illusion of yourself,

someone you work so hard to appear to be.

If one looks deep enough,

the truth is not hard to see,

soon all your manipulations have been in vein.

Being the real person,

takes character and real moments of pain.

Not an easy task,

when pretending is so acceptable

and easy to pass their way.

Is it a chase your vanity needs to survive,

or only a woman's attempt at love,

that builds your pride?

Oh God,

pray unlike you,

she never becomes so sick inside,

that her true feelings she'll have to hide.

Pray she never misses Love,

for Love has been an emotion,

she has never really known.

Pray she will never use passion,

to build an eloquent image of a false lovers end,

not a honest way,

to create an image,

to give worth as the illusion begins.

To tell a story,

tell the truth.

To paint a picture,

use colors bold and true.

To create a total life,

give honesty,

accept no illusions,

as your futures only truth.

How long can you hide,

how expensive will be your pride.

What will this illusion,

cost you at life's end.

You understand we all know the truth,

we see past the creations of your mind.

Tuck in your heart the knowledge,

this masquerade,

will end in time.

Upon the finish,

you will start again,

exactly where you leapt off,

you will begin yet once again.

©bydiana2001 dedicated to those who feel they must settle for less when it is a truthful life they really want. Give no illusions, deceive not yourself...and you will not suffer the consequences in the end.. We are all people of repeat behavior..unless we change ourselves we will live the same situations over and over again....only with different people each time. What can we do to break the cycle? Be honest with ourselves...and change our relationship habits.  Did you wake up every morning and then one day discover your partner had a life separate from the one you thought you had...like they had deep dark secrets that you didn't know. Don't kid yourself or anyone else....You knew those secrets but you ignored them...you did it to survive and keep the bad relationship together. Perhaps you wanted to protect your pride by keeping the truth from everyone you know. You even gave your partner your blessing to lie to you and everyone else. Because for it to work you had to become their accomplice to some degree. How many woman have said they knew their husband was cheating or lying in hind sight? And how many of those woman went on to get involved with another man who was the same. I know from experience that you can change the cycle..it takes time and work...and a drive to become honest with your life. Every time something does NOT ring true and you get a bug in your gut..investigate it. You may appear paranoid but you will end up proving to yourself that you can trust your inner voice and/or instincts.  Every creature on the earth has this capability...so why do we believe we humans don't? Because all our lives starting at birth we have been told what we saw or felt was wrong.. I don't think any of us know how many lies we hear in any given day...Mom crying and us as young children going to her saying, "Mom don't cry, don't be so sad". And Mom not wanting us to know something was wrong said, "I'm not sad, I'm not crying". Right off the bat we begin to not trust our judgment. Think of all the times in your life you saw a situation and called it for what it was..only to have someone lie and say you were wrong.. I say trust your gut instinct and be honest with yourself. If you don't in a few years you'll be asking yourself, "why do I attract people who lie (cheat, abuse, drink or do drugs)"? I say it's because you live in a fog or bury your head in the sand and they need someone like that to survive. Think about this....The first time you cover-up for them they know exactly what they can do to you and how far you will go to sustain their illusion. And that is the attraction they feel for you, someone not willing to be quiet will not be chosen. Be careful Ladies all the truths to your Lover are kept in their past relationships...the only difference between then and now is your willingness to turn your eyes and keep the silence. Is the idea of having a man in your life worth selling your soul and pride? Maybe some will believe the illusion, or pretend they do but in "your" heart you will always know exactly what your relationship really was. I don't know about you but my heart and opinion of myself is more important than the other hearts and opinions around me.

Be leery of Friendship groups that keep secrets...EXAMPLE: you go out and one of the husbands is having an affair and brings their friend with them when their wife is not able to come one night....nobody in the Group tells the spouse.   I have met people like this and it is a unbelievable situation. Understand if your husband would bring a friend of his own they would not tell you either. Key thing to remember..how they treat others is how they would treat you, nobody is special to them. Run from this group as fast as you can.

Be leery of Married men who want to have an affair with you... again NOBODY IS SPECIAL..and we are all pattern people including your love interest.

A funny thing happened at a store the other day. A man came in with his baby daughter alone. Later the wife came in and I told her how all the woman were SO impressed at what a wonderful father he was to bring the baby by himself to the store. She laughed and said it was a first time and probably a last time...he only does it to get woman's attention...something he got a lot of. Think about that, woman do love a man with a child. But does he do anything with the children at home. He was drunk the second time he came in with his wife but those woman didn't see that LOL. Why do we woman make big deals about men doing what we do on a daily basis?

The human mind is so complex. Most people are out trying to find a person who creates the same marriage as their parents even if they hated their parents marriage. These souls only feel comfortable living in a situation that they were raised in and one that feels normal to them. They may have no idea it's dysfunctional unless a person who is mentally healthy lets them in on the secret. Open your eyes and look around..pay more attention to what you are told and what you see.. Listen to what people say and then watch what can be seen. One person I know screamed he loved  his wife..she was pregnant with twins at the time..yet he was trying to have an affair with me LOL..Nobody could understand the insult to me even though I was one of his Mother's friends and a FEW years older than he. One woman said I should be flattered LOL... if that's LOVE and RESPECT keep it away from me. Watch if someone says they have a fantastic marriage and have a deep loving relationship with their spouse..yet they work over time every moment they can when they don't desperately need the money...or they LOVE their kids and do nothing to spend any time with them. Working hours of over time or hours when the kids are out of school rather than change their schedule even with a pay decrease to a time they could see their kids. I don't know about you but time with my children was always worth more than gold. I needed to work enough to survive but anything after that was not worth my time away from my kids. For the most part people will project to be anyone they think you will accept..That is the human way. Seeing past that and walking away is becoming honest with yourself and others. And is the best way to protect yourself from disrespect and abuse.

Now maybe seeing a friends husband have an affair, (lie to them, abuse them in any way) does not affect you. Maybe you even think your being Religious because God says not to judge.  Think about this..... by allowing this to go on in your space with no negative action from you ...you are sending everyone..even your spouse... a message that it is OK behavior. Again what you say and what you do are two conflicting things. My philosophy...there are millions of people who inhabit this planet... I can't waste my time or show simple niceties with/to a few ass holes, LOL. Every moment you live is a gift...use your gift in a way that it will not come back to haunt you. Diana