The Apartment

By:  Lara

 

 

“Josh, c’mon.”  Justin Timberlake bounced the basketball with one hand as he ate a chili dog with the other.  “It’s still early…we can get a basket if we hurry.”

Joshua “JC” Chasez sighed, rubbing his temples with his fingers. “I can’t, Justin. Not now.  And quit bouncing the damn ball. I have a headache.”

Justin stopped long enough to toss the wrapper from his chili dog, then he resumed his dribbling.  “JC, I took the freaking bus all the way over here, and you…”

“Justin, I need to look through the newspaper, okay? I need to find a place to stay.”

Justin looked around the apartment.  “Why? This place is great. Better then the damn dorms, lemme tell ya.”

“I can’t afford it anymore.”  JC’s blue eyes were full of sadness. “My dad isn’t gonna pay for it anymore.  My mom convinced him not to pull the tuition money, but he said I will have to find my own damn place to live, direct quote.”

“Shit, man.”  Justin sat down at the table next to JC.  “I’m sorry.  He hasn’t gotten over it, has he?”

“Nope.  It’s bad enough that his son has a bachelor’s degree in music education, bad enough that he’s now going for his master’s degree…but the fact that he’s bisexual…that’s the straw breaking the paternal back.”  JC picked at a corner of the newspaper.  “He actually asked me to take it back. He said he’d pay my rent for the next ten years, if I’d “take it back.”  Hello, I’m bisexual.  I can’t just “take it back,” for God’s sake.”

“Of course not.”  Justin rubbed JC’s shoulder, basketball long forgotten.  JC smiled at him.

“Thanks for understanding, Justin. I know you don’t quite understand, but you try.”

“Hey…if you wanna get it on with a guy, not my problem. I can still beat your ass at basketball no matter what,” Justin said with a shrug, and JC punched him.  “Go shower, man. I’ll look through this. I’m itching to get out of the dorm…freshman dorm sucks ass…maybe we could get a place together.”

JC stared at him.  “Would your mom let you?”

“God, JC, she loves you more than she loves ME.  She’ll go for it completely.  Go shower…relax…I’ll find us something,” Justin said confidently. JC finally smiled a real smile.

“Okay.”  He clapped Justin on the back and went off to take a shower.

“Someplace cheap…near campus…with enough room for us…yeah…like THAT will happen,” Justin mumbled as he got up to pour himself a soda.  He sat back down, tilting his chair back on two legs as he folded the newspaper in half.  “Okay…no…no…oh God, you couldn’t PAY me to live there…” Justin set the chair down with a hard thump. “Wait a minute.”  He picked up the paper and went to stand outside of the bathroom door.  “JAYCE?”

“YEAH?”  JC yelled over the water.

“Turn off the shower for a second, man,” Justin said, and the water stopped.  He opened the bathroom door, choking against the steam.  “Where’s Atherton Street?”

“Atherton.” JC thought for a moment as he poked his head around the shower curtain.  “It’s off of College Avenue and Polk, I think…in that new section of apartments. Did you find something?”

“Yeah, listen to this.”  Justin leaned in the doorway.  “Great three bedroom apartment on Atherton Street, one bedroom with own bathroom.  Roommates needed.”

“Yeah,” JC said, waiting for more.

“Get this…Must be gay friendly. Call 555-2659 and ask for Lance.”  Justin watched JC’s face.

“It does not say that.”

“I swear on Michael Jordan’s jump shot,” Justin vowed. 

“No fucking way.” JC’s face lit up.  “Call him.”

“Excellent.”  Justin headed back out to the phone as JC started the shower again.

 

“Wow. I like this place already,” Justin said as they drove by a nice park with a basketball court.  “Look at that!”

JC smiled as he turned the corner onto Atherton Street.  “Doesn’t take much to make you happy, does it?”

“Hey, there are some cute girls…guys, too, if you’re interested.  The perfect neighborhood for us,” Justin finished, smiling with satisfaction.

“Look at the buildings, please.  Find me number six-twelve.  It’s the entire top floor of Six-Twelve Atherton Street,” JC reminded him.

“I know, I know.  Just because I’m younger than you doesn’t mean I can’t read, JC,” Justin said, annoyed.  “Hey, there’s six-fourteen. You missed it.”

“No, YOU missed it, dumbass,” JC snapped, pulling his black Jetta into the small driveway between the buildings.  JC checked the hastily scribbled notes in his hand. “He said there’s a stairway behind the building.”

“There.”  Justin pointed to a rickety set of wooden steps.  He and JC carefully began to climb.  “Okay…I don’t know if I can do this every day.”

“We don’t even live here yet.  And quit complaining.  Be nice,” JC ordered, ringing the doorbell.

“JC, for God’s sake, I…” Justin began, then pasted on his best smile as the door opened. 

JC’s mouth opened and closed.  On the other side of the screen door was one of the most beautiful faces he had ever seen.  Short blond hair spiked up all over, and shy green eyes sparkled on an alabaster face, marred only by a slight bruise below the right eye.  Red lips curled up into a crooked grin.  “Hey.”  The low voice made JC’s knees week.  “I’m Lance.  You’re Josh and Justin?”  The southern accent curled around JC’s name and made him want to giggle like a schoolgirl.

“Yeah…well…I’m Justin, and he’s Josh,” Justin answered. He poked JC in the back.

“Um, yeah.  But everyone calls me JC,” JC finally said.

“Okay…JC.  C’mon in.”  Lance unlocked the screen door and moved aside so they could come in.  “Home sweet home.  This is the foyer.” Lance turned in the small space and laughed.  “Elegant, huh?”  He led the way into the kitchen.  “I’m assuming I don’t have to tell you that this is the kitchen.  We have been blessed with a dishwasher, which is good, since this is the one chore I hate.”  He led the way down the hall to the other rooms.

“My God…JC, you already live here!” Justin exclaimed, turning around and looking at the immaculately clean apartment.  Lance gave him a questioning look.  “Someone else who is as anal as you!”

“Justin!”  JC snapped, embarrassed and horrified.  Lance only laughed, a deep rich sound that gave JC goosebumps.

“He’s right…I’m terribly anal and fussy…you’ll probably hate living here.”

“JC will fit right in.  You, however, will have to get used to terribly NON-anal and fussy me,” Justin said, poking his head into the living room. “Wow.  Nice stereo.”

“Gift from a friend,” Lance said simply.  “Yeah, this is the living room…here’s the coat closet…there’s a linen closet down that way, by the bathroom.”  Lance turned a corner and went up a few steps.  “This was once all one house, then someone bought it and broke it into two apartments.”  He opened a door.  “This is my room…the master bedroom, I guess you could say…it has the attached bath.  I assume it’s not a big deal to you if I stay in this room?”

“Of course not,” JC answered automatically, his eyes drinking in every little detail that could tell him more about this beautiful boy.  Drawings lined the walls, drawings of southern homes and green fields.  JC saw snapshots of a man and a woman and a girl who looked a little older than Lance.  He saw math and accounting books piled on the desk next to the computer.  “How old are you?” He asked.

“Twenty.  Twenty-one in May, thank God.  Only seven more months to go,” Lance answered.

“Did you draw those?” Justin wanted to know.

“No. I can’t draw.  I’m not very artistic.  My sister did those…to remind me of home…Mississippi,” he informed them.

“Really? I’m from Tennessee,” Justin told him with a grin.  “Another southern boy.”

“Are you from the south, too?” Lance asked JC, closing the door behind him and leading the way back down.

“No…Maryland, actually.  I met Justin about six years ago…we worked together,” JC said carefully.  Lance froze and turned back around.

“Oh my GOD…that’s why you two look so familiar!”  His beautiful green eyes widened in shock.  “You were Mice!”

Justin laughed out loud.  “I cannot believe you recognize us. NO one recognizes us.”

“My sister Stacy LOVED that show.  She was in love with some guy…” JC blushed as Lance’s eyes turned to him.  “She is gonna shit a house when I tell her about this.”  He led them to the other end of the house.  “Okay, like I said, there’s the bathroom…the linen closet…here are the two bedrooms.” He opened the doors and stepped aside. “They’ve been empty for about a month.”  JC watched Lance carefully as he stepped into the bedroom.  A veil of sadness wafted over Lance’s face.

“I’ll have to buy a bed,” Justin realized.  “I’m in the dorms now.”

“I have an extra one,” JC said absently. “If you don’t mind it being a double.”

“Hello, I am in the dorms. I would be happy with a cot,” Justin told him.  “Besides, I can get busy in small spaces.”

JC blushed and glared at him. “Sorry,” JC said to Lance, who shrugged.

“Not a big deal. Let’s go into the kitchen.”  Lance led the way back and they sat at the table.  Lance passed around cans of soda.  “Here’s the deal. Like the ad said, I’m gay.  I don’t have anyone special right now, but I also don’t have a revolving door on my bedroom.  I don’t have AIDS or any diseases. I just like to get that into the open.”  His green eyes were serious.  “Do either of you have a problem with homosexuals?”

“Hell, no!” Justin said, surprised.  “JC’s bi, anyway.”

“Really?”  Lance looked at JC, who tried to shrug it off.  “Very cool.  I had to ask…I had a few guys here last week who pretended they were interested just so they could punch a fag.”  He pointed to the bruise on his face.  “I hope you understand.”

“There will be no more fag punching as long as I’M here,” Justin bragged, flexing his biceps.  JC rolled his eyes.

“Justin is heterosexual, as well as egotistical. Just because he’s on the basketball team, he thinks he’s Michael Jordan,” JC said.  Lance grinned.

“I hope none of your teammates will mind you having a gay roommate,” he said softly.  Justin shrugged.

“Fuck them if they do. I have friends.  I don’t have straight or gay or bi friends, I just have friends.”

Lance smiled, his eyes flicking over to JC.  “You with anyone?”

“No,” he whispered.

“He just got dumped,” Justin offered.

“Do you EVER shut the hell up?” JC moaned.  Lance laughed.

“Yeah, well, me too. That’s why I have the rooms,” he said softly.  “My boyfriend Alex was one of my roommates…he dicked me over with the OTHER roommate, Howie, who I THOUGHT was straight.”

Justin hissed in a breath.  “Damn, that’s harsh.  Well, I promise you, if you and Jayce decide to get it on…you don’t have to worry about me dicking you over with him. I think he’s a scrawny ugly piece of work.”  Lance laughed again and JC refrained from killing his best friend.

“I’m an accounting major, so you know. I have a lot of tests, so I hole up in my room a lot during the week.  The walls are pretty sound, however, so if you make noise, I won’t hear it,” Lance said.  “I’ll take care of getting all the bills paid…we’ll split everything three ways, except I thought we could alternate the grocery bills.  There are three phone lines…it just makes things easier.”

“Cool,” Justin said, nodding. “I haven’t decided about my major…I play basketball and everything…so I’m out a lot for that.”

“I’m a grad student,” JC finally volunteered. “I’m busy, too.”

“He’s a music major,” Justin told Lance.  “You should hear this boy sing!  Voice like an angel.”

JC blushed furiously. “You can sing, too, Justin.”

“Yeah, well, only in the shower, baby boy.”  Justin ruffled JC’s hair.  “You’re the songbird.”

“So…would you guys be interested?” Lance asked, crossing his hands on the table in front of him.

“Are you sure you want us?” JC asked, glancing at Justin.

“Absolutely,” Lance said, smiling at him, then glancing over at Justin, who was studying the magnets on the refrigerator.  “You interested, Justin?”

“Sure…anything to get out of the dorms,” Justin said. “And it’s probably better that I not live alone with Josh. We’d end up killing each other.”

“I’m one helluva moderator,” Lance said, standing up.  “How about moving in next weekend?”

“Sounds good…I’ll get some of the guys from the team to help us get our shit together,” Justin told JC. “Okay?”

“Okay.”  JC stood as well. “Thanks, Lance. You don’t know what kind of lifesaver you are.”

“You’re welcome, Josh,” Lance said in a soft voice, and the way he looked at JC made JC think that maybe he did understand after all.

 

JC skipped one of his Saturday music seminars to move into Lance’s apartment with Justin.  Three of Justin’s friends from the basketball team came to help out, three guys that JC knew and liked.  A lot of the guys on the team were assholes, but like Justin had said, if they had any kind of homophobic issues, they weren’t friends of his.  His friendship with JC came first.

Lance had a path cleared to the back bedrooms, and a pot of coffee was brewed and ready. “I love you already,” JC moaned, gratefully accepting the steaming mug.

“You’re welcome,” Lance said with a grin.  He handed another mug to Justin, who was watching his friends struggle up the wooden staircase.

“I don’t do coffee, but thanks,” Justin said, waving the mug away.

“I didn’t think you did.  I made you hot chocolate.”  Lance handed Justin the mug.  “I’m gonna go clean out space in the linen closet for your towels and shampoo and stuff.”  Lance went back into the apartment, Justin staring at his back.

“Do you think we could marry him?” Justin asked in awe.  JC smiled.

“I thought you were straight.”

“I told you I thought I was PROBABLY straight.  But hell…he’s worth looking into.”  Justin blew on his hot chocolate.

“Back off, Timberlake,” JC almost growled, and Justin froze.

“Yo, Just…where am I going here?”  Two of the guys struggled in with a trunk. 

“Back hallway, room on the right,” Justin directed.  The men left the kitchen and Justin turned back to JC. “You have a crush on Lance?”

“I don’t have a ‘crush’ on Lance.  I’m twenty-three years old, for God’s sake.”  JC looked at Justin in disgust.  “I also just met him.”

“And every time I stopped by this week to help you pack, you were on the phone with him,” Justin said with a grin.  “You are SO smitten.”

“Smitten?” JC glared at Justin. “Learn a new word?”

“Yeah, in English class yesterday.”  Justin wandered down the hall towards his bedroom.  “Smitten smitten smitten…” he sang over his shoulder.

“Fucking retard,” JC grumbled, but he wasn’t sure if he meant Justin, or himself for letting Justin figure it out.

 

Justin’s friends finally left around five.  The boxes and things were IN the apartment, if not unpacked.  Lance had called out for pizza, and they were waiting for the delivery boy.  Justin had sliced his finger trying to put his bed frame together, and JC was carefully bandaging it.

“If I miss a game because of this, Chasez, you are so dead,” Justin moaned, hissing as JC poured peroxide on it.

“Why is it MY fault?”

“Your stupid bed.”  Justin watched JC’s nimble fingers wrap the gauze.  “Thank you, though, for playing nurse.”

“Why is it always nurse? Why isn’t it doctor?” JC snapped, tired and irritable.

“Because nurses have a better bedside manner and you’re always sweet to me,” Justin said, and JC blushed.  Lance smiled.  For all their bickering, it was obvious that the two of them were closer than brothers.

“What made you quit?” Lance asked suddenly.  Justin looked up at him.

“Huh?”

“The whole performing thing.”

JC blushed slightly.  “We didn’t quit…not both of us.  I loved it, but I loved being a normal kid more.  JC here…he tried…went out to California for a summer…but it didn’t work so he came back here and went to school,” Justin told Lance.  The doorbell rang before Lance could ask anything else. “Hey, I’ll get it.  Money, please.”

Lance handed over two twenties.  “On me.  Celebration of our first meal together.”

“Cool. Thanks, Lance.”  Justin took the money happily and went to answer the door.  JC looked at Lance.

“That wasn’t necessary, but thank you,” JC said.  Lance shrugged.

“One of you can get it next time.”  Lance stood to go into the kitchen.

“Lance, wait.” JC put a hand on his arm. “I need to tell you something about my money situation.  Even Justin doesn’t know this, so I want to keep it quiet.”

“Okay,” Lance said slowly.

“My dad hates the fact that I’m gay…well…bi.  He pulled my rent money, which is why I have to move in here with you and Justin.  He wants to pull my tuition, too, and my mom is fighting him tooth and nail.  ANYWAY…she sends me checks under another name…on the envelope. So if you see envelopes coming here addressed to a name you don’t know, it’s me.  She told him it’s a charity she sends money to every month.”  JC looked away, blinking hard.  “A fucking charity,” he repeated bitterly.  Lance put a hand on JC’s shoulder, then pulled him into a hug.

“I understand, Josh, believe me,” Lance said quietly.  “My dad has just recently started to let me back into the house again. I think he felt sorry for me when my mom told him about what happened with Alex.  He hates having a gay son, but he’s learning to at least put up with it.”  Lance gave JC one more squeeze before pulling back.  “If you EVER wanna talk about it…come to me. Day or night. When it gets so bad you feel like you can’t handle the hurt…come to me, okay?”

JC looked into Lance’s green eyes and tumbled right over the edge…falling totally in love.  “Okay,” he whispered back.

“Hey, Lance, you got any beer?” They heard Justin yell from the kitchen.  Lance sighed and pulled away.

“Not for you, Justin, you’re underage!” Lance yelled, heading into the kitchen.

“So?”

“I’m not getting JC busted by having beer in the house, Justin,” Lance said, pulling some iced tea from the fridge.  “He’s the one whose ass would get kicked because you and I are underage.”

“Dammit, I hate being a kid,” Justin pouted, but he took the glass that Lance handed him.

“What took you so long with the pizza?” JC asked.

“Oh…I knew the delivery guy.  His name is Nick Carter…he tried out for the team and made it, but his grades dropped and he’s already on freaking academic probation.  I bet if he could get a really good tutor, though, he’d be able to pull the grades up.”  Justin looked at JC hopefully.

“No. No way in hell.”  JC grabbed the two pizza boxes and headed into the living room, where they were planning on watching a video.

“Oh, Jayce, c’mon…look how you helped me in history. I never woulda passed my senior year in high school without you!”

“That was different…I don’t even know this guy, Justin.”

“I don’t really, either, but he’s a great player and we could use him. Josh, please? He needs help in math and geography.”

“Would he be willing to pay?” Lance said suddenly, and JC stared at him.

“Hell, yeah, anything to get on the team,” Justin said in surprise.

“I can take care of the math if you can take care of the geography,” Lance said to JC.  JC thought for a moment, then shrugged.

“If you want to.  We can get him here like two hours a night or something, one for you and one for me.”  JC sighed and looked at Justin. “I spoil you rotten, brat.”

“You guys rule!” Justin exclaimed, chomping down on his slice of pepperoni.

 

They quickly fell into an easy pattern of basketball games, study sessions and arguing.  JC and Lance got along relatively well, though there were times when Lance bothered even the easygoing JC. Everything had to have its place, and even Justin admitted that JC was the most non-anal retentive person in the world compared to Lance sometimes.  JC and Lance fought, of course, but the true arguments were easily broken up by one word from Lance, who could make you see the other person’s side of things incredibly quickly.

“Shit…has anyone seen my green warmup shorts?” Justin asked one Saturday morning, walking naked and dripping out of the shower.  He dug in the laundry hamper.  “Jayce?  Did you steal my shorts?”

“I’m sleeping, prick!”  JC yelled from behind his bedroom door.

“Check behind the hamper,” Lance said from behind the newspaper.

“They’re not here,” Justin called. Lance sighed and got up from the kitchen table.

“Justin, I am sure they…” Lance froze in the hallway, swallowing deeply.  His eyes ran over Justin’s muscular form, making sure to dwindle on the midsection.

“They what?” Justin asked.  “I love those things. They’re my good luck shorts. I always work out in them on a game day.”

“Try my room,” Lance said weakly. “I have a green shirt that color…maybe they got mixed in with that.”

“Cool.”  Justin sauntered down the hallway, giving Lance a great view of his ass.

“Oh, fuck,” Lance moaned, leaning against the wall and closing his eyes.  He already considered Justin and JC two of his best friends, but he was having a severe problem dealing with Justin. “Why…why…why…why do I always fall for the ones who are straight?”  Lance moaned.  Alex had been the exception to the rule.  Lance always seemed to develop feelings for straight men, and Justin was just so easy to have feelings for.  He was spoiled and nosy and lazy, but he was also sexy and fun and kind and crazy.

“I found them!” Justin said triumphantly.  Lance opened his eyes, praying Justin had the shorts ON. His prayers were not answered.  “Thanks, Lance.”

“You’re…uh…you’re welcome,” Lance said quietly.  Justin flashed his beautiful smile and went into his bedroom.  Lance rolled around, leaning his forehead on the wall. He’d talk to JC. Maybe he could weasel some information out of him…and by some miracle he’d find out that Justin was secretly bi or something.

 

A few weeks passed.  Nick started coming over every Tuesday and Thursday for two hours at a time.  JC would work with him first, then Lance would take over.  JC liked Nick.  He wasn’t too bright, but he was nice, and he seemed to have absolutely no problem with the fact that JC was bisexual and Lance was gay.

Lance.  JC was going crazy over him, though he kept it hidden well.  Their personalities were similar and they probably would have gravitated towards one another even if they hadn’t lived together.  Lance was incredibly smart and organized, and if you had any kind of problem, he was quick to help you figure out a solution. He realized that Justin seemed to depend on JC for a lot of things he shouldn’t have, and he subtlety took over some of the responsibilities that JC had undertaken regarding Justin. He goaded Justin into doing his laundry, taught Justin to cook, even made Justin stay in his room and study when all Justin wanted to do was watch TV.  And he was so beautiful, a fact he didn’t even know.  So JC pined away silently, being Lance’s friend when all he wanted to be was so much more.  He hated himself for it; he wasn’t a drama queen. That was Justin’s department. But loving Lance was the one secret thrill he allowed himself in his otherwise quite depressing personal life.

 

“Where’s Justin?” Lance asked when he came into the apartment and saw JC eating a TV dinner. 

“Basketball…then one of the cheerleaders was having some sort of shindig so he was gonna stop by there.”  JC tossed the empty TV dinner container into the trash.

“On a weeknight?” Lance asked, tossing his backpack onto the floor.

“It’s some sorority thing…I don’t think it’s gonna run real late.” JC stretched.  “God…I’m so out of shape.”

“Why hasn’t he done that…joined a frat, I mean?” Lance said, digging in the fridge and coming out with a head of lettuce and some vegetables. 

“Because of me,” JC said softly.  Something in his voice made Lance turn around and look at him.  Guilt was written all over JC’s handsome face.  “He went to a few of the parties at the beginning of the year…but he hit most of the clique frats…and they didn’t like that he was friends with a gay guy…so he said fuck them all and went to live in the dorms.”  JC studied a crack in the kitchen counter.  “I coulda kicked his ass for that.”

“His ideas of friendship and loyalty are really strong, aren’t they?” Lance asked quietly.  JC nodded.

“Yes.  When I saw him here on campus a few months back I almost had a heart attack. We were a long way from the Mickey Mouse Club…I mean, I never thought I’d see you again.  But he walked up to me, gave me a big hug and started chattering away.  We became real tight real quick…his family is awesome and I really like them…I’ve visited a few times.  He’s kinda taken me under his wing.”

“Don’t you mean that the other way around?” Lance asked, dumping vinaigrette dressing onto his salad.

“No…you just haven’t seen it yet.  If I get down, he does some crazy thing to cheer me up. If he gets invited to parties, he brings ME instead of a date…he’s just crazy…but he’s like the little brother I never had.”

“Does he have a girlfriend?” Lance asked fearfully.  JC shrugged.

“Not that he’s mentioned. I’m sure he has his eye on someone.  Maybe this cheerleader…I think her name is Britney.”

“And he’s not…like you or I?” Lance asked hesitantly.

“Not that I’m aware of. He says he’s straight, then he jokes about being curious.  I wouldn’t know…he’s never asked me to help him figure it out,” JC said with a laugh.  “Well, I gotta go study. I’ll talk to you later.” JC wandered down the hallway to his room.  Lance munched away at his salad, deep in thought over Justin.

 

“Guys, I have the BEST idea.” Justin breezed into the apartment, his cheeks flushed from the cool October air.

“No,” JC said automatically.

“Can someone help me, please!”  Lance yelled from the kitchen. They walked in and found him balancing precariously under a pile of pots and pans.  “I wanted the bottom one and they all kinda fell out.”

Justin grabbed the pile, easily hefting it back into the cupboard.  Lance sighed as he watched the muscles ripple in Justin’s arms.  “Okay, so this idea…”

“No,” JC repeated.  “Need help with dinner, Lance?”

“No…I’m cool.” Lance turned back to the counter.  “Does your idea have anything to do with studying for your geometry test?”

“No,” Justin said, annoyed.  He stuck his tongue out at the back of Lance’s head and JC grabbed it.

“Apologize,” JC snapped.  Lance turned around, his mouth watering at the sight of Justin’s pink tongue.

“Ahm sowwy Wance…” Justin mumbled around JC’s fingers.  JC let go, wiping his hand on his leg and smiling cheerfully.  “Anyway…I think we should have a party. A kickass party for Halloween. A costume party.”

“No,” Lance and JC said together.

“C’mon, guys,” Justin said, hurt.  “It would be cool.  I could invite some of the team, some of the cheerleaders…JC could invite some of those weirdos from the music department and Lance could invite some of those boring math nerds.”  Justin hopped up onto the counter, swinging his legs.  He swiped a piece of raw potato from Lance’s bowl.  “What?” He asked as they both glared at him.

“Justin, I don’t think having a party is a good idea,” JC said with a sigh. “Maybe Lance doesn’t want total strangers invading his apartment.”

“This is OUR apartment,” Lance reminded him. He smiled at Justin.  “I don’t know, though…”

“Hey…maybe you guys could hook up at the party!” Justin exclaimed, and JC gave him a look that could fry bacon.  “I mean…like maybe Lance has a friend for JC, and vice versa,” he ended quickly.

“Not again,” JC moaned, rubbing his temples.  “Justin gets these matchmaking bugs on occasion…consider yourself warned.”

“Warning accepted.” Lance looked at Justin. “I don’t want a bunch of drunken jocks fucking their girlfriends in my bed,” he told him.

“No fucking in your bed…got it,” Justin said, nodding, and JC had to laugh.

“If Lance says fine, I say fine,” he said. Justin looked at Lance and Lance’s heart melted.

“Fine,” he said, and Justin let out a whoop.

 

“I got my costume!” Justin yelled the day before the party.  Lance was going to be an artist.  He had a frilly white shirt that he had splattered paint on, a pair of dark black jeans, and a beret.  JC thought Lance looked damn sexy in the beret, and he wanted to rip the shirt off of him and fuck him as soon as he saw Lance in it, but he carefully refrained, saving the mental image for when he was alone in his room and could jack off in peace.  He himself was going to be a cowboy.  He knew it was a lameass idea, but it was totally NOT in character for him, and Lance had loaned him a cowboy hat and a brown leather vest.  Any excuse to wear something of Lance’s was enough to get JC to dress like a cowboy.

“Let’s see it,” Lance said, coming out of his room and rubbing his temples.  He had a big test the Monday after the party, and he knew he wouldn’t be getting much studying done over the weekend.

“You okay?” JC asked him, massaging Lance’s shoulders.  Lance moaned and JC’s dick leapt in his pants.

“Yeah…stressed. I need this party, I think.”

“I’m gonna go try it on.” Justin darted back into the bathroom.

“God, what a drama queen,” JC groaned and Lance laughed.  “Sometimes I wonder if he’s really eighteen and not eight.”

“He’s eighteen,” Lance promised him.  “Even eight year olds are more mature than he is.”  He pulled the carton of milk out of the fridge.

“Okay…what do you think…isn’t it cool?” Justin announced, striding into the kitchen.

The carton of milk fell at Lance’s feet, unnoticed.  Justin was dressed as a gladiator.  A thin leather strip ran diagonally over his smooth chest, ending at a leather kilt that only went halfway down his thighs.  Brown leather sandals completed the outfit.

“You’re not gonna wear that, are you?” JC asked with a laugh. “Lance, what do you think?”

Lance was incapable of thought. His eyes were glued to Justin’s strong chest, glued to his long legs.  He swallowed deeply and tried to think of something intelligent to say. “It’s certainly…um, revealing,” he said weakly, bending down to pick up the milk carton.

Pain flashed through JC as he watched Lance watching Justin.  That was it.  Lance was fucking hot for Justin.  That’s where all the questions had come from.  That’s why Lance didn’t talk about dating.  Lance wanted Justin. “I need to go.”  JC grabbed his coat from the hook by the door.

“I thought you were gonna help me study!”  Justin exclaimed.

“I need to study on my own. Get LANCE to help you,” JC snapped, running out the door and slamming it behind him.

 

JC strode along the sidewalk towards campus, muttering under his breath.  “Justin. Fucking Justin.  It figures. I mean, why wouldn’t he want Justin? Justin’s fun and sexy and crazy…I’m boring as hell.  I’m a nerd. I’m an old man compared to them.  Justin’s awesome and of COURSE Lance would want him.”  JC kicked at some leaves.  “Justin is also straight as a fucking arrow. Doesn’t Lance know that?”  JC wanted to hit something.  He wasn’t even sure what he was mad at. It certainly wasn’t Justin’s fault…and he couldn’t hate Lance for wanting someone.

He turned a corner by the library and collided with someone.  Books fell to the ground.  “Oh, God, I’m sorry,” he said, looking down at the blond head as the person stooped to pick up their things.

“It’s okay.” Nick Carter looked up and grinned. “Hey, JC.”

“Hey, Nick.  I was just, uh, going in to study.”  JC motioned to the library.

“Yeah, I was just in there.”  Nick stood, scratching his head.  “Um, you don’t have any books.”

“Oh, yeah. Right.”  JC looked down at his empty hands.  Nick tilted his head to the side. 

“I was about to go to the gym and shoot some hoops. Wanna come with me?  I could use some competition.”

JC started to decline, then realized he really didn’t have anywhere else to go. And he liked shooting baskets.  “Okay.”

Nick walked next to JC as they went towards the gym.  “So…I thought you’d be getting ready for your big party tomorrow.”

“It’s not my party. It’s Justin’s party.  Lance’s party. Not my party,” JC mumbled. 

“You okay?”  Nick put a hand on JC’s arm.  JC shrugged.

“Yeah…a lot on my mind.”

“I hear ya.  I’m so worry about these tests coming up. If I can pass, I’m back on the team.”  Nick held open the door to the gym.

“You’ll do fine, Nick,” JC said encouragingly.  “You’re really catching up in geography, and I’m sure you’re doing just as well in math.”

“You and Lance are good teachers,” Nick said as they entered the locker room.  JC realized he didn’t have anything to change into, so he sat and waited for Nick to put on sweats and a tank top.

“Yeah, well, I get practice being a Teacher’s Aide,” JC told him.  Nick was dressed quickly and they headed out onto one of the courts.  The gym was practically deserted.

“So…you’re bi, Justin said,” Nick commented, tossing JC a basketball.  JC sighed.

“I should just take out a fucking billboard.”  He shot and missed. “Yeah, I am.”

“Cool.  And Lance is just full out gay, huh?”

“Yep.”

“Justin mentioned something about someone hitting him?”

“Yeah, some assholes who came around pretending to be interested in the apartment.”  JC’s next shot swished through the net.

“Well, if anyone gives you, or him, any shit, don’t hesitate to call me,” Nick said, holding his ball.  “I’m serious.  That shit is just wrong and if any of my friends get treated that way, the person doing it better run like fucking hell.”

“Okay,” JC said, smiling at the younger boy.  “So…what’s your costume?”

Nick actually giggled, hiding his face in his hand.  “Well…it’s so retarded. I couldn’t figure out what to wear, so I got some of the girls to find me a cheerleader’s costume. I know, it’s silly…but they found one that will actually fit…”

“That will be great,” JC had to laugh.  “Nick, I’m glad you asked me to shoot with you.”

“Me, too,” Nick said, tossing the ball back over his head without looking. It sank perfectly and JC groaned.

 

JC slept in Saturday morning. He knew that he should be out helping Lance clean, but let Justin help him clean. He had been up late the night before, shooting hoops with Nick and then going for pizza with him. It was almost midnight when he had snuck in the door.  There was a note on the fridge saying that Justin was out with Britney, and he saw a light under Lance’s door. He ignored that light and went to bed.

He rolled over and looked at the clock as the vacuum purred to life. Only Lance would clean the apartment before a party that would end up destroying it anyway.  It was close to noon.  JC stretched and got up, pulling on a pair of sweatpants.  A pile of wet towels in the hallway was evidence that Justin was already up as well.   JC went into the shower, letting the hot water roll over him for almost twenty minutes before he actually soaped up.

“Hey,” Justin said as JC walked into the kitchen.  “Want an egg sandwich? I’m making them…Lance taught me how.”  Justin was beaming with pride.

“You know how to make egg sandwiches and now you’re Julia Fucking Childs?”  JC snapped, reaching for the coffee.

“No…I just…” Justin looked incredibly hurt and JC felt guilty.

“That’s great that he taught you that, Justin.  But no thank you…I’m not hungry. I have to run out and pick up some things for the party,” JC told him. 

“Want company?”

“No…I’m sure Lance would prefer you to stay and help him,” JC said and Justin groaned.

“Justin, are these wet towels on my clean floor?” Lance screamed from the hallway.

“Are you SURE you don’t want company?” Justin begged, and JC had to smile.

 

“You told them, right?” Lance was saying when JC came back to the apartment at six.  “You told them to stay OUT of my room.  My room is not a den of sin for your friends, Justin.”

“Lance, you should be happy that your room is at least seeing SOME action. It’s as dead as JC’s bed,” Justin said, and JC was surprised to hear Lance chuckle.

“Hey.”  JC poked his head into the kitchen to say hi before heading to his room.

“It’s about damn time!  JC, people will be here!  You need to put your costume on.”  Justin gave him a glare as he adjusted one of the straps of his sandals.

JC made himself look away from Lance. It just wasn’t fair that he could look that fuckable and not be available to JC.  “I’ll put the costume on, but I’m not hanging out all night at your party.  My room is off limits, too, by the way.”  JC dropped the bag of snacks and food onto the table and headed for his room, hiding the bag from the liquor store inside his jacket.  Lance followed him.

“JC, are you sure about this? I mean, I thought some of your friends were coming to this, too.”

“They are…but they’re leaving early. There’s a concert at the music hall that they’re going to.”

“Why aren’t you going?”

“I thought you might need me here,” JC said softly, and Lance grinned.

“God, JC, you are like the best friend.”  Lance gave him a hug, squeezing part of JC’s heart into pieces.

 

“Garbage, Lance?” Nick asked over the booming music.

“In the corner!”  Lance yelled back, grinning.  Nick nodded and tossed his soda can in the general direction of the corner.

“So…where’s this Josh guy?” Brian asked Lance.  Lance looked over the crowd. 

“There. The skinny one in the corner.”

“He’s cute…you were right.”  Brian poked Lance in the arm.  “That hottie is living with you and you’re not going after him? What’s your problem?”

“We’re just friends,” Lance said. “C’mon. I’ll introduce you.”  Lance grabbed Brian’s arm and dragged him over.  “Jayce.  This is Brian Littrell.  He’s in my major. This is Josh Chasez, but everyone calls him JC.”

“Nice to meet you,” JC said politely, shaking Brian’s hand.  Lance discreetly left to mingle.

“So…Lance tells me you’re a music major?” Brian asked.  JC nodded, again infinitely polite.  “That’s really cool. I love music myself…though I’m going into the business side of things.  My dad thought it would be smarter in the long run.”

JC sighed at the mention of Brian’s father.  “Yeah…dads tend to interfere, don’t they?”

“Yeah.”  Brian smiled at him.  “So…you were on that Mickey Mouse Club?”

JC sighed again.  “Look, Brian…I’m sure you’re really nice and everything…and I’m sure Justin talked Lance into trying to hook me up with someone, but I’m not interested.  Not just you…I’m not interested in any kind of relationship right now. I’m sorry, man. You seem nice.”  JC clapped Brian on the back and went to say goodbye to his own friends.

 

“Have you seen JC?”  Lance pulled on one of Justin’s curls, dragging his attention away from Britney, who was dressed in a toga.

“Um…about an hour ago…he was saying goodbye to his friends at the door,” Justin told him.  “Hey…are you SURE we don’t have any beer, Lance?”

“Justin, we went over this,” Lance snapped.  “I’m not getting JC’s ass kicked for you and your friends to get a buzz.”

“I know, Lance, I know, God.”  Justin rolled his eyes, making a big deal of it in front of his friends.  Lance sighed.  He knew Justin thought of him as a dad sometimes, but he couldn’t help the way he acted.

“Okay.”  Lance smiled at Justin.  “Is this the party you were hoping for?”

Justin’s sunny smile lit up his face.  “Yeah.  Thanks a lot for talking JC into it, Lance.  You’re awesome.”  Justin gave him a big hug and Lance closed his eyes, savoring the moment.

 

JC shut his door, locked it and went over to the desk, tossing his cowboy hat onto the floor.  In the bottom drawer of the desk was a brown paper bag, and he pulled it out.  He lined up the two bottles of vodka on the edge of the desk, staring at them for a long moment. Shit. He had forgotten something to mix it with.  He slipped out of his bedroom, noticing Lance, Britney and Justin talking in the corner.  Justin’s hand was on Britney’s back, lightly rubbing.  Ha.  See, Lance?

JC grabbed the carton of orange juice from the fridge and a glass from the cupboard, trying his best to ignore the fact that Justin and Lance were now hugging.  He went back into his bedroom and quickly mixed the vodka and juice.  He gulped quickly, his throat burning.  When the glass was empty, he filled it again, this time adding less juice.

JC pulled off his shirt and Lance’s vest, falling onto the bed.  Justin. Life just wasn’t fair. It wasn’t even Justin’s fault…it wasn’t his fault that he was beautiful and sexy and Lance wanted him.  Hell, he had wanted him, too, at the beginning.  When they had run into each other on campus, JC’s dick had hardened as soon as he took one look at Justin and the way he had grown up. JC filled his glass a third time.  He had figured it out quick, though.  Justin was off limits, and they had eventually become best friends.

He was well into the second bottle of vodka when someone walked into the room.  He sat up, looking at the stranger quizzically.  “Can I help you with something?”

A hand reached up and slowly pulled off a pair of sunglasses.  “Oops. I was looking for the bathroom.”  Brown eyes studied JC, running over JC’s bare chest and tight jeans.  “This isn’t it.”

“No.  Please don’t piss in here,” JC said, then chuckled at his own joke.  He struggled to his feet, looking at the man.  “Nice costume.”  The man wore leather pants and a black wifebeater.  A black shirt was open and accentuated the slimness of the man’s body.  “Badass, huh?”

“I don’t need a costume for that.”  The man took a step closer.  “Vampire.” He motioned to the marks colored in on the side of his neck.

“Oh. Right.”  JC scratched his head, wondering who this person was.  He knew most of Justin’s friends.  “I’m Josh.”

“Josh…right.  I’m AJ. I know Lance.”  The slender hand reached out and JC took it.  AJ looked at JC, then looked at the desk.  “You shouldn’t drink alone.”

“Yeah, well, the roomies aren’t legal, so I decided to keep it in here.” JC sat back down on the bed, slightly unnerved by this sensual stranger.

“I’m legal…I was twenty-one in January. You mind?” AJ motioned to the bottle.  JC shook his head and AJ took a large gulp of the vodka.  “Yes.”  He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “So…Josh.  Why is a sexy man like you drinking all alone in here?”

“That’s just it.  Because I’m alone,” JC said sadly, and AJ sat down next to him on the bed. 

“You shouldn’t be.  Where’s your boy…or your girl?” 

JC was amazed that AJ knew he was bisexual, but if he was a friend of Lance’s, perhaps Lance had told him.  “I don’t have one.  I don’t really want a girl, and…the boy I want isn’t interested.”

“What a stupid bastard,” AJ said gently, his dark eyes unreadable.  JC took another swallow of his drink, wondering why he wasn’t kicking this guy out of his room.  “I’m interested in you.”

“You are?” JC whispered, the loneliness and the alcohol overcoming the warning alarms that were going off in his head.

“Yeah.”  AJ’s hand settled on the back of JC’s neck as he swooped in for a kiss. JC moaned. It had been so long.  And he could almost pretend it was Lance. He was almost drunk enough for that.  A hand slid up JC’s chest, tweaking his nipples.  JC ended the kiss, clumsily pushing at the shirt AJ wore. AJ chuckled as he shrugged out of it.  “Horny, are we?”

“Fuck, yes,” JC admitted without shame, admiring the tattoos that snaked around AJ’s thin arms.

“Good. Me, too.”  AJ pushed JC back onto the bed, his small body falling over JC like a blanket.

 

JC woke up the next morning cursing himself.  He should not have drunk that much. He couldn’t handle it the next day. He wasn’t nauseous, but the killer headache was enough to make him want to burn down every liquor store in town.  He opened one eye and checked out the clock.  Eleven-thirty.  He could hear someone out in the hallway, and figured that it was Lance.  He rolled over and his eyes opened wide.  Shit.

A pair of brown eyes twinkled at him. “Hello, Sleeping Beauty.”

What was his name?  Um, AJ. “Hi, AJ.”  JC slowly sat up.  “Look…” JC’s face burned with shame. “I don’t do one night stands, okay? It’s not me. And…”

“Hey, buddy, it’s cool.  You enjoyed it…I enjoyed it.”  AJ smirked. “You DO remember it, right?”

JC’s blush was all the answer AJ needed and he laughed.  “Yeah, I remember.”  JC rubbed his forehead.  “You want some coffee or breakfast or something.”

“You’re a sweetheart.” AJ got up to start getting dressed.  “Coffee would be cool.”

“Okay.”  JC sat on the edge of the bed for a moment.  He couldn’t believe what had happened.

“Chill, Josh. It’s okay.”  AJ’s catlike body fell onto the bed again.  He patted JC’s shoulder.  “Guys have little rendezvous like this all the time.  I used something…we were careful. I’m clean, I promise…and I can tell by looking at you that you are, too.  It’s okay.”

“Yeah,” JC said sadly, trying not to think of the blond outside his door.

 

“So then he like just threw the ball into the crowd!”  Britney said, giggling.  JC heard Lance’s chuckle and smiled.  This made it all worthwhile. Justin was still in bed, and Lance had to entertain his girlfriend.

“Good morning,” JC said politely, leading AJ into the kitchen.  He was shocked when Lance stood up so fast his chair fell over.

“What the fuck are you doing here? Get OUT of my apartment!”

“Hey…you got new magnets.” AJ inspected the magnets on the refrigerator.

“What the FUCK are you doing here?”  Lance screamed.

“I heard about the party and crashed…and then Josh here invited me to stay.” AJ smiled at JC, then looked back at Lance.  “Is that a problem?”

“Alex, get your skanky ass OUT of my apartment.  NOW.”  Lance gripped the counter with white knuckles. “Go back to Howie.”

“Oh, yeah. We broke up. I thought you’d want to know.”  AJ looked over at the shocked JC and smiled. “Thanks, baby.  You were amazing.” He quickly kissed JC, then sauntered out the door.  Lance’s enraged green eyes turned to JC.

“You fucked him?  Let him fuck you?”

“Lance, that was Alex? Oh, shit, I didn’t know!  I swear to GOD.  He said his name was AJ…he said he knew you.  I didn’t know…” JC sat down hard.  “I was fucked up, Lance. Drunk off my ass and he just walked into my room.”

“I don’t fucking believe this.”  Lance threw a coffee cup and it shattered against the floor.  Britney jumped.

“Hey, what’s going on out here?”  Justin leaned in the doorway, blinking sleepily.

“JC got laid last night,” Lance snapped.

“Really?  Cool!”  Justin said happily.

“No, it’s not.  Can you think with your brain and not your dick for five minutes?”  JC almost yelled.

“You’re one to talk, JC,” Lance retorted.  “I can’t believe you let him into my home.”

“Lance, for the last FUCKING time, I didn’t know who he was!  How could I have known!  I’m sorry I brought those awful memories back into your apartment, but I didn’t know, okay?  I’m a monster.  Fine.  I’ll just go back to my room and let you to your dreams that will most certainly NEVER come true.”  JC stomped off to his bedroom, slamming the door behind him.

 

JC had finally stopped burning with shame when someone knocked on his bedroom door. “Jayce? It’s me.  It’s Justin.”

“Go away. Go play with Britney.”

“I sent her home. Please, Josh, let me in?”

JC sighed and sat up. When Justin got the pouty tone, there was no refusing him.  He slowly stood up and unlocked the door.  He frowned when he saw Justin AND Lance on the other side.  “What?”

“I’m sorry, JC,” Lance said. “You had no way of knowing that AJ was Alex. I shouldn’t have said what I did. I’m sorry.”

JC looked at Lance, his heart melting.  He was so beautiful.  “Apology accepted.”

“Good.”  Justin’s bright smile flashed out.  “I couldn’t handle it if the two sexiest men in my life were fighting.”

Lance looked at Justin.  “You think I’m sexy?”

“Sure. You and Josh are two sexy mofos.”  He kissed Lance’s cheek, then kissed JC’s. “If I ever decided to go bi…you two would be the first I’d call.”  He laughed.  “Yeah…we’d make one hot threesome, wouldn’t we?”  He turned and went towards the bathroom. “I need a shower.  You two make up.”

Lance bit his bottom lip as he watched Justin walk away.  JC watched Lance, his heart hardening more by the minute. “Anything else?” He snapped.  Lance looked back at JC.

“Uh, well, no.”  He started to turn away, then came back.  “Yes, actually.”  He gave JC a gentle push into the bedroom, closing the door behind them.  “What did you mean earlier?”

“About what, Lance?” JC asked with a sigh, carefully falling onto the bed and snuggling down into the pillows.  Lance pulled a cover up over him, tucking JC in.  He sat on the edge of the bed.

“What you said about my dreams coming true,” Lance said nervously.  JC sighed again.  He hated being a nice person.

“I know you have a thing for Justin, Lance. I can see it in every move you make when he’s around.  I mean, we’re still all getting to know each other, but it’s pretty obvious.”  JC’s heart broke with every syllable.  Lance blushed a deep red.  He was so adorable when he blushed.

“Well…I…yeah.  I guess I have like a crush on him or something.”  Lance snorted.  “Me…liking him.  Like it would ever work.  Number one, he’s straight.  Number two, he’s Justin.  Need I say more?”  Lance rubbed his eyes.  “Is it so obvious?”

“I kinda recognize the symptoms,” JC said with a small smile.  “I had a crush on him once, too. It’s hard not to. He’s a great guy.”

“But he has Britney.”  Lance watched JC carefully.  “You and he never…”

“Oh, we joked about it once or twice…and hell, even now I wouldn’t mind seeing what kind of kisser he is…but he’s outta my league.”

“You’ll find someone, Josh,” Lance promised, squeezing JC’s leg under the covers.  JC bit back a moan.  “And I really am sorry about Alex. I hate to tell you, but he probably won’t contact you again. I bet this was some kind of sorry-ass way of revenge because of what happened between he and I.”

“I’m not counting on hearing from him again, Lance. It was a one-time thing,” JC told him.

“You don’t seem like the one-time thing kinda guy, Josh,” Lance said gently.  JC noticed that Lance used his real name more than his initials, and decided he liked it.

“I’m not.  I was horny and I was lonely and I was drunk.  Is any of that a crime?” JC snapped.

“No, of course not.”

“I want to get some more sleep.  Would you mind leaving now?”  JC closed his eyes, not wanting to see the hurt in Lance’s beautiful eyes.

“No, I don’t mind.  I hope you feel better…and I hope you find someone so you’re not so lonely.”  Lance left and closed the door.  JC wanted to cry, but instead he screamed into the pillow.

 

Nick Carter passed all his tests and was readmitted to the basketball team, but he still came over a few nights a week to hang out.  Lance seemed to resent the intrusion into any time he might have with Justin, but he hid it fairly well. Only JC noticed, because he understood.  He began to resent any time that Justin spent with Lance, so he was extra nice to Nick whenever he came over.

“You interested in Nick?” Justin asked JC one night after Nick had left.  Lance had gone in to take a shower, leaving Justin and JC alone.  JC dropped his Music Theory book onto his foot and cursed.

“What?  Nick CARTER?”  JC stared at him.  “NO!”

“Oh…cuz you guys seem to be all buddy buddy suddenly,” Justin said, watching JC carefully.

“Justin, he’s a nice guy.  He’s fun to hang out with…I like him.  But NOT like that.”  JC picked up his book and shoved it into his backpack.

“Jayce, can I ask you something?”  Justin followed JC into his bedroom and flopped onto the bed.

“Justin, I need to work on this paper.”

“Just for a minute, okay?”  Justin’s eyes were serious.

“Okay.” JC sat down at his desk and turned on his computer.  “What’s up?”

“How did you know?  I mean, what made you decide that you were bi?”

JC stared at him.  “Are you taking a survey?”

Justin smiled and picked at JC’s bedspread.  “Nah…just wondering. I mean, how did you know?”

“There’s a difference between being bisexual and being curious, Justin.  A lot of guys your age get curious.  I kinda knew all along.  I had crushes on guys just as much as girls…and it’s weird.  I think girls are sexy and everything, but I really see myself in a long term relationship with a guy, not a girl.”

“Hmmm…” Justin pondered that for a moment.  “JC, can I kiss you?”

JC knocked a stack of floppy disks off the desk.  “What?”

“Let’s just say I’m curious.  I want to kiss a guy. I feel like kissing you.”  Justin sat up. “Can I?”

“Justin…you’re cracked in the head,” JC stammered.  “Man, why couldn’t you have asked me this like four months ago when I really wanted it?”

“You wanted to kiss me?” Justin’s ego bubbled to the surface and JC had to grin.

“Yeah, I did. Then I got to know you and realized you were a straight, sexy, spoiled brat who I would have killed before we were three months into a relationship,” JC teased.

“I’m not spoiled,” Justin pouted, and JC laughed out loud.

“So what brought all this on?”  JC tried to avoid the kissing issue.  He almost felt guilty about it, because of Lance’s feelings.

“I just…I’ve been thinking. I met someone recently, and I’ve just been wondering, you know.”

“What about Britney?”

“She’s great, man.  Not all that bright, but she’s fun and sexy as hell.  Good in bed, too.”

“TMI.”  JC put his hands over his ears.  Justin slowly pulled the hands away and held them.

“Kiss me, Jayce.  Please? I can’t just walk up to some random guy…”

“Go kiss Lance,” JC said lightly.

Justin shivered.  “No way. I just…I don’t think I could do that with him.  You’re my best friend, JC.  We were Mice together. Please?”

“I cannot believe I’m even agreeing to this,” JC sighed, moving to sit next to Justin on the bed.  “You will owe me so big.”

“I’ll do your laundry for a week,” Justin promised, and JC laughed again.

“Yeah, like THAT will happen. You can wash my car on Saturday.”

“Deal.”  Justin looked at him expectantly.  “So, what do I do?”

“God, Justin, it’s just kissing, not rocket science.  Pretend I’m Britney, without the rack.”

“Fuck you,” Justin said, but he smiled.  They studied each other for a moment, then Justin slowly reached up to touch JC’s hair.  His hand fisted in the dark locks, and their heads slowly moved towards one another.  Their lips met, and JC couldn’t help but sigh.  He just KNEW that kissing Justin would be heavenly. 

JC finally pulled back. “So…there you go.”  His voice was shaking slightly.  He was glad to see Justin’s hands shaking as well.

“Wow.  You…you kiss really good.”  Justin was blushing furiously.

“Any different than kissing Britney?”

“Better,” Justin decided, and JC blushed. “Thanks, Jayce.  You didn’t have to do that, but thank you.”

“So…gonna let me in on this secret crush?”  JC asked.  Justin shook his head.

“Not yet.  It might not be anything.  It might be like you said…just curiosity.  Don’t worry, it’s not you,” Justin finished hastily.  JC smiled.

“I didn’t figure it was.  Can I work on my paper now?”

“Sure.”  Justin went to the door. “Thanks, JC.  And hey…I’m sorry, you know, that you’re not with someone.  You need to be spoiling someone else besides me.”  Justin closed the door behind him.

JC turned to his computer, staring at the screen.  He wanted Lance.  Lance wanted Justin. Justin wanted Britney, plus some nameless guy.  Life was getting confusing.

 

 

JC was studying in the student union building one afternoon when someone kicked the back of his chair.  He jumped.  “Oh, hey, Lance.”

“Hey.”  Lance pulled out the chair next to him, blowing on his hands.  “Jesus, it’s cold out.”  His nose and ears were red, as were his pale cheeks.  He wore a heavy coat, but no gloves or hat.  “I can’t believe it’s only the beginning of November.  We are in for a hellish winter.”

“Lance, it’s like freezing outside.  Don’t you have a hat or gloves?”

“Um…I let Justin borrow them this morning because he couldn’t find his and he was running late,” Lance mumbled.  JC glared at him. “I know…I know.  Don’t baby him so much. But I didn’t know it was this cold out!”

“Here.”  JC handed over a grey knit hat and a pair of gloves.  “Use mine.”

“But Josh…”

“I only have to run next door to the Arts Building. You have to run all over campus. Take them.”  JC gave Lance a look.

“Okay, fine. Thanks, Josh.”  Lance gave him a bright smile.

“Excuse me, Mr. Chasez?”  A feminine voice said behind them.  JC turned around.

“Oh, hi, Bobbie.  Bobbie, this is Lance Bass.  Lance, this is Bobbie. She’s in the class that I help out with.  And you’re…”  JC looked at Bobbie’s friend.

“Christina. I’m in the class, too.” The girl with multi-colored braids gave him her best smile.  “And this is my friend, Amanda, but every calls her Willa.”  She nudged the girl next to her.

“Of course, Christina.  Nice to meet you, Willa,” JC said politely.

“Hey.”  Bobbie’s eyes flickered over to Lance, then back to JC. She twirled a piece of blond hair around her finger.  “Um, Mr. Chasez?  I was wondering if we could talk to you for a second.”

“I need to roll, anyway.” Lance stood. “Nice meeting you, ladies. I’ll get these back to you later, JC.”  Lance gave JC a wave and wandered off.

“Lance, wait…” JC began, but he was already out of earshot. He sighed and turned back to the three girls.  “What is it?”

“Well, Mr. Chasez, I…”

“I told you to call me JC.  God, I’m not THAT much older than you,” JC said, rolling his eyes. The girls giggled.

“I know, but you’re like a teacher practically,” Bobbie reminded him.  “And I was wondering if…”

“Hey, JC.” Nick Carter ambled over, popping a grape into his mouth.  “Oh…sorry…was I interrupting?”

“Not at all,” JC said gratefully.  Bobbie had been ogling him through the semester, paying more attention to him then to the professor’s lectures.  It was starting to get embarrassing.

“Hi there.” Nick turned to the girls.  “Grape?”  He held out the bunch, and they each plucked a grape or two, Willa’s eyes never leaving Nick’s face. He turned back to JC.  “I saw this hanging up and thought you might be interested in it. I know you said something about needing extra money.” Nick handed JC a flyer.  “You’d be perfect.”

JC folded it up without looking at it.  “Thanks, Nick. You’re coming over tonight?”

Nick nodded. “I get off work at nine. I told Justin I’d bring him dinner.”

“Make sure you get some onions on this one, okay?  I like onions.”

“I spoil you guys rotten,” Nick said with a grin.  “Just be happy I don’t work for a health food restaurant or something.”  JC shivered at the thought.  “I’ll see you later.  Bye, girls.”

“Bye, Nick,” they chorused.  They turned back to JC, newfound respect on their faces.

“You know Nick Carter?” Willa asked breathlessly.

“Yes. I tutored him.”  JC stood up and gathered his things together.

“Wow,” Christina whispered.  “He and Justin Timberlake are just amazing.”

JC couldn’t help but grin.  “Justin’s my best friend.   I live with him and that guy, Lance, who was here earlier.”

“Wow.”  Bobbie looked at JC flirtatiously.  “The three of you all in one apartment?”

“Yeah.”  JC didn’t like the look on her face.  “What did you need help with, Bobbie? I’m in a hurry.”

“Oh, I’ll talk to you later about it.  Bye, Mr.…I mean, JC.”  She tugged on Christina’s jacket.  “We’ll let you go.”  The girls started to walk away, and he could hear them whispering excitedly about Nick.  JC sighed, thanking God that he wasn’t completely straight.

As he walked out of the building, he opened the flyer that Nick had given him. One of the small jazz clubs downtown was looking for someone to play piano in the bar.  It would only be on Sunday nights, but it was a job.  JC thought about it as he walked into the music building.

 

JC stayed late in the music department that night, helping out with some things.  Anything to keep him out of the apartment. Justin was still his best friend, but it was harder and harder to watch him with Lance.  Lance just could not hide his feelings, and JC knew that Justin was just idiotic enough to not notice.  And then there was Justin’s newfound curiosity.  What the hell was THAT all about, and WHO was it about?  Was it JC?  Had Justin lied?  Was it Lance?  JC hoped not.  He would HAVE to move out if that was the case.

As he unlocked the door around eight forty-five, he could hear yelling inside. He quickly shoved his key into the lock and opened the door. “Dammit, you fucking child, gimme!”  Lance yelled.  JC heard Justin’s laughter and hurried into the living room.  Justin was jumping up and down, holding a disk over his head.

“Come on, Lance.  Come on, boy!  Jump!” Justin giggled.  Lance made a weak attempt to grab the disk, but Justin swiped it out of Lance’s reach.

“Justin, I will fucking shave your head bald if you do not give me that disk!”  Lance yelled.  “I need to work on that program!”

“Lance, you’ve been working too hard. You’re always holed up in your room. Every night when I come home from practice, you’re in there. I don’t have practice tonight, Nick’s bringing dinner, and we’re gonna hang out. ALL of us.” Justin caught sight of JC.  “Right, Jayce?”

“Justin, give him the disk,” JC said with a sigh. He looked at Lance.  “It would be cool to see something besides your closed bedroom door for once.”

“Aw, I didn’t know you guys cared,” Lance said sweetly.  He used the opportunity to jump for the disk, but Justin was too fast.

“Step aside, boy. Let the man show you how it’s done.”  JC tackled Justin, pulling him onto the floor.  Justin screamed like a girl.

“No…tickling…Josh…that’s not fair…you know how…ticklish…” Justin puffed for breath as Lance looked on enviously. Life wasn’t really all that fair.  Why hadn’t HE thought of that?  But he knew he never would have had the nerve to touch Justin like that.

“Hey…the door was open,” Nick called, walking into the living room.  “Um…is this some kind of orgy I wasn’t invited to?”  He set the pizza on the coffee table.

“JC is being my hero and rescuing my disk,” Lance told him.

“Ow!  Justin, that was my head you just elbowed!  Give me the disk!”  JC shouted, wrestling to get Justin underneath him.

“Let go of me!  Get your scrawny ass off me!” Justin said, laughing so hard he could hardly talk.

“Okay…you asked for it.”  JC closed his eyes and went in for the kill.

“WHOA!”  Justin yelled, dropping the disk.  JC picked it up and stood, panting for breath.

“Here.”  He handed the disk to Lance.

“Thanks.”  Lance frowned.  “He DID elbow you.” Lance’s fingers lightly touched a bruise near JC’s ear.  “You have a bruise.”

“I’ll put ice on it.”  JC smiled grimly at Justin.  “I warned you.”

“You…you horny bastard!” Justin sat up, staring at JC.  JC went down the hall to his room, whistling cheerfully.  Justin looked over at Nick and Lance.  “He grabbed my dick!”

“He what?” Lance wanted to die.  JC had touched Justin’s…

“He fucking grabbed my dick!”  Justin struggled to his feet.  “I hope you enjoyed that!”  He yelled to JC.

“Not as much as you did, I’m sure!”  JC yelled back.  Justin blushed.

“God…this place is a madhouse. Let’s eat.”  Nick grabbed the pizza and carried it into the kitchen.  Justin followed, mumbling something about horny bisexual choirboys.  Lance stood alone in the living room, his hands itching to touch Justin.

 

“Justin…your ticket came.”  Lance waved an envelope in the air as he brought the mail in.  He handed the envelope to Justin.

“Sweet.  Mom’s home cooking. No offense, Lance, but you just can’t cook the way she can.”  Justin smiled up at Lance, who ruffled Justin’s curls.

“No offense taken.  Hey, JC, you got your plane ticket, right?”  Lance asked, his eyes flickering over to JC.  JC shrugged.

“Oh…uh…yeah.  I got it last week.”  He looked at Justin. “Can I use your cellphone?  Something’s wrong with my phone and I need to make a long distance call.”

“Sure. It’s in my duffel by the sofa,” Justin said.  Lance pulled off his coat and hung it up. 

“Whose turn is it for dinner?”

“Jayce’s.  He has chicken in the oven.”

“Cool.  I’m gonna go shower. I think my nose is frozen.”  Lance rubbed his nose as he headed for the shower.  He stopped in the hallway.  “Justin…why are you here?”

“I live here?”  Justin asked.

“He got suspended from the team for the week,” JC informed Lance as he re-entered the kitchen to grab his books.  Lance stared at Justin, who visibly shrank.

“You WHAT?”

“I got in a fight at practice yesterday,” Justin mumbled.

“WHY?”  Lance slapped the table and JC and Justin both jumped.

“Defending your honor, Poofu-Bear,” JC said cheerfully, using the nickname that Justin had devised for Lance.

“WHAT?”  Lance almost screamed.

“I was defending JC, too,” Justin said quickly.  “One of the seniors started talking shit about fags, and I started talking shit back about assholes and Nick jumped in and we got suspended for kicking the guy’s ass.  His friend’s, too,” Justin said proudly. “People don’t talk shit about my friends that way.”

“Justin…” Lance began, then smiled.  “I should tell you that fighting is wrong…”

“JC already did,” Justin said sullenly.

“And I should tell you that I can fight my own battles…”

“JC already did.”

“But thank you.  Thank you very much.”  Lance’s eyes were soft as he looked down at Justin.  JC’s heart hurt.

“I’m gonna go make this call. Dinner should be done in an hour,” he said softly.

“Like I said, I’m gonna shower.  Justin…did you finish your homework?”

“You know, you’re worse than my mother,” Justin grumbled as he stood, which meant that he hadn’t started anything.

“Now that you’re not practicing this week, you can catch up on all kinds of work,” JC pointed out, grinning.

“Dammit…” Justin began, frowning. “I’m gonna call Britney. SHE won’t boss me around.”

“Yeah, right,” Lance and JC said together.

 

JC stared at Justin’s cellphone for a long moment before he finally dialed his home phone number.  “Hello?”

“Hi, Mom. It’s me.”

“Joshua!”  His mother said in a whisper. He heard her walking, and then a door closed.

“I’m sorry…I’m on Justin’s cell. I didn’t want this number to show up on the Caller ID.”  JC closed his eyes. “How are you, Mom?”

“Good, honey.  How are you?”

“Great.  Classes are going well, I’ve gotten a few thesis ideas…and living with Justin and Lance is like a dream come true for me.”

“Good, Joshua.  You’ve been getting my money?”

“Yes, thank you. I’m gonna pick up a part time job soon, after Thanksgiving.  That way I can help with some of it.”

“I’m just sorry I can’t send more,” his mother said apologetically.  “Joshua…about Thanksgiving.”

A pain tore through JC’s chest at his mother’s tone.  “What?”

“I don’t think…the whole family will be here and…I just don’t want there to be a scene.”

JC felt tears jump to his eyes.  “I understand,” he said softly. “I want you to have a nice holiday.”

“Joshua, I’m sorry. I definitely want you here for Christmas.”

“Yeah, sure,” he said. “Look, Mom, I have to go make dinner. I’ll talk to you later.”

“Joshua, I’m sorry. I love you.”

“Yeah, you too, Mom.” JC hung up, fighting back tears.

 

“God, I’m actually gonna miss you guys!”  Justin said the night before they were supposed to go home for Thanksgiving break.  Nick was over, and the four of them were playing poker.

“I’m gonna miss your money,” Nick commented, pulling in the huge pile of bills that he had just won.

“Fuck you, Carter,” Justin growled.  “That was money for my mom’s Christmas gift!”

“Then you shouldn’t have agreed to play, Justin,” Lance reminded him. “Who wants more to drink?”

“Me.” Justin held up his glass.  Lance brought the bottle of soda over and refilled Justin’s glass.

“Josh, how about you?  Josh?”  Lance nudged JC.

“Huh? Oh, yeah.”  JC handed Lance his glass, then got up from the table.  “It’s starting to flurry.”

“No, it’s not.” Justin kicked back his chair and ran to the window.  “No, it’s NOT!  It better damn well stop by tomorrow.  I am supposed to be on a plane by three.  Three o’clock in the afternoon.  It WILL stop.”

“I’m sure God will hear THAT prayer,” Nick said, laughing. “My flight leaves at two, so I understand.”

“I’m outta here at three-thirty.  When’s your flight again, JC?” Lance asked.

“Um, six.  I got a late one,” JC told him.  He watched the snow fall, praying that everyone would be out of his hair as soon as possible. 

 

By two o’clock the next day, the snow was falling hard and fast.  Justin had spent the night at Britney’s dorm room, and JC figured he had caught a cab from there.  Lance left the house at one, saying he wanted to get to the airport early just in case there was a problem with the roads.  So JC was alone by one, and out the door at one-fifteen.  He plunged his way through the snow to the liquor store, which he knew would be open.  “Why ain’t ya going home, kid?” The man behind the counter said.

“No home to go to.”  JC flashed his ID and lined the bottles up on the counter.

“Bad holiday, kid?” The man asked sympathetically.

“You could say that.” JC watched the man carefully pack the six bottles of liquor into a box.  “Can I come back for that? I need to hit the supermarket.”

“Sure thing, kid.”

 

JC struggled up the steps, almost slipping on the snow.  He deposited the box of bottles on the table, then went back down the steps for the three bags from the grocery store.  He had bought a bunch of soda for mixing with the liquor, snacks, and a tiny turkey and some sides.  If nothing else, he could be thankful by himself.

He was hanging up his wet clothes in the bathroom when he heard someone at the door.  He heard stomping feet, then a gasp. He grabbed the closest weapon he could find, which was one of Justin’s sneakers that was laying in the hallway. He tiptoed out and peeked into the kitchen.  “Jesus GOD, Lance, you scared the fuck out of me!”  JC yelled, dropping the sneaker.  “What the hell are you doing here?”

“My flight was cancelled.  The snow’s too bad.”  Lance looked at the table, then up at JC. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing,” JC said sullenly, throwing Justin’s sneaker back into the hallway.  “I’m gonna go take a shower.”

“No, you’re not.”  Lance put a hand on JC’s arm. “What’s going on?  You’re not leaving, are you?”

“Dammit to hell life fucking sucks!”  Justin yelled, struggling in the door. He shook snow from his curls.  “Fucking airport.  What the hell?  They’re pilots, for fuck’s sake. They should know how to fly ABOVE the snow.”  He froze as he looked at the table. “You assholes!  You’re throwing a party without me?”

“Justin, shut your big fucking mouth!” Lance snapped, and JC stared at him.  He never spoke to Justin that way. “Josh, tell me.”

The kindness in Lance’s tone, the warmth of his eyes…it was enough to break the dam around JC’s heart.  “I’m not going home.  My mom told me not to come…said it would be too uncomfortable.”

“Jayce,” Justin whispered.  “God, man…you coulda come home with me.”

“I didn’t want to come home with you, Justin,” JC snapped, then regretted it.  He looked into Lance’s sympathetic face.  “I wanted to go home.”

“Josh.”  Lance pulled him into a hug, ignoring the fact that he was still wearing his wet coat.  “I’m so sorry.” 

JC cried on Lance’s shoulder without shame. He felt warmth at his back, and sighed as Justin’s arms enveloped both JC and Lance the best he could.  “Dude…I’m sorry.”  Justin’s voice was muffled in JC’s shoulder.

“It’s okay. Not your fault.”

“Well…we’re here now.” Justin pulled away. “And I see you have dinner here.”

“It’s not enough for all of us,” JC protested. 

“We’ll make it enough,” Lance decided. “We have other food.”

“And you’re gonna share all this, right?”  Justin picked up a bottle and shook it.  JC sighed.

“What the hell. No one’s on campus to bust us, anyway.”

“Excellent!” Justin shouted, and JC had to grin.

A knock at the door made Justin freeze.  Lance peeked through the curtain and opened the door. “Hey,” Nick said bashfully.  “My flight was cancelled.”

“Come on in,” Lance said with a grin, moving aside.  “We’re throwing our own Thanksgiving party right here.”

“Cool.  Thanks.”  Nick came inside and JC smiled at him, feeling a bit better as he realized that being with these three people would make him happier then any meal at home.

 

Justin found Nick a pair of extra large sweatpants and a tshirt, since his clothing was wet from the snow. They all got cleaned up and changed, and they were soon congregated around the kitchen table.  Lance was digging in the freezer.

“We have some chicken,” he said, poking around. “And more vegetables. I think we have more potatoes, too…so we can have something else besides what JC bought.”

“What JC bought is enough,” Justin said, rubbing his hands together as he looked at the bottles.  Nick slapped his head.

“Back off, Junior.  Some of this has to last until tomorrow. TOMORROW is Thanksgiving.”

“This isn’t your house.  I can do what I want.” Justin reached for the rum and JC slapped his hand. 

“Back off, Junior.  Nick’s right. It’s MY booze, and I decide when, and IF, you drink any.”

“Fuck you,” Justin said, pouting.  Lance turned around and saw the pout. His heart melted into his sneakers.

“Give the baby something to drink, Josh,” he said, laughing at the way Justin’s face lit up.

“Yeah, give me something to drink!  I’m depressed! I don’t get to go home, and I can’t get near Brit, even though she’s still on campus. This snow sucks!”

“Britney didn’t make it out, either?” Nick asked, and Justin shook his head.

“Flights to Louisiana were cancelled, too.”  Justin’s face lit up.  “Hey! Could she come over, too?”

“No,” Lance and JC answered together.  Lance blushed.

“Dude, I hear enough rooming next to you. I don’t need to hear you getting busy while I’m snowed in with you,” JC told him. Justin reddened.

“You can hear us?”

“Justin, I can hear you,” Lance told him. “Actually, all I really hear is HER, not you. You’re kinda quiet.”

“We are not having this conversation,” Justin decided, grabbing some Coke from the fridge. He opened the bottle of rum before JC could say anything.

“Okay.”  Lance turned back to the freezer.  “We’ll just have it when you’re too drunk to care.”

 

Nick quickly made some cheeseburgers for dinner, and it wasn’t long after that the drinking began.  Lance and JC had conferred quietly before dinner, and three of the six bottles were hidden in Lance’s closet.  Justin was known to snoop for something he wanted, but they both knew he wouldn’t think to enter Lance’s room.

Justin was sprawled out on the sofa, Lance on the floor in front of it.  JC was also on the floor, and Nick was curled up as best he could be in an armchair.  “I think we need to find a man for JC,” Justin decided, throwing his arm out.  “Refill.”  Lance filled his glass with rum and Coke.  “He needs to get busy.”

“He already got busy recently, remember?” Nick pointed out. JC glared at him.

“Thank you, Nickolas, for reminding us.”

“Yeah, that skank doesn’t count.”  Justin looked over the edge of the sofa.  “Lance, you really let that guy fuck you?”

“Well…yeah…”

“And you did too?”  Justin looked at JC, who shrugged. “Shit.  I wouldn’t let him near me.  The guy who fucks me is gonna be special.”

JC spit out his vodka and orange juice.  “And just what guy is this, Justin? Do we have some sort of schedule?  First kissing me, then fucking someone else?”

Lance’s mouth fell open.  “You kissed Josh?”

“Actually, he kissed me. It was all him.” 

“I should kick your drunk ass!  I did NOT start it…he asked me to kiss him.”  JC stood.

“Really?  Like was it some bigass French kiss with tongue?”  Nick asked eagerly, struggling to his feet as well. 

“No.  It was…sit up, Justin.” JC grabbed the front of Justin’s shirt and pulled him into a sitting position.  “It was like this.”  JC almost stumbled over Lance as he put his lips on Justin’s, running his fingers through Justin’s curls.  He pulled away smiling. “Like that.”

“Oh…see…cuz if I was like, kissing Justin or something…I’d do this.”  Nick pulled Justin until he stood up.  He put his hands on Justin’s shoulders and kissed him hard and fast.  JC could see Nick’s pink tongue invade Justin’s mouth.  “Like all forceful.”  Nick giggled madly.

“For fuck’s sake, can we PLEASE stop kissing the freshman now?” Justin yelled.  Nick released him, still giggling.  Justin lost his balance and fell onto Lance. 

Lance frowned.  Why was everyone kissing Justin but him?  He could do it. Justin was right there in his lap.  He could say it was just part of the drunken joke that JC and Nick were playing.  But he couldn’t bring himself to do it.  “You must be good,” he said weakly.

“I AM good, but still.  And you’re not even gay!” Justin yelled up to Nick, who was still giggling.  “Lance, they’re picking on me,” Justin pouted, snuggling closer to Lance.  “And I can’t reach my drink.”

“Here you go, you big baby.” JC handed Justin his glass. “Now leave Lance alone.”

“No. Lance makes a good pillow,” Justin said stubbornly.

Lance looked down at the snuggling Justin in his arms and sighed. Sometimes God liked you.  “He’s fine,” he told JC.  JC’s eyes narrowed as he looked at Justin.

“Fucking brat,” he snapped, and stumbled out into the kitchen for a snack.

 

“Nickolas.  Your turn.”  JC looked at Nick.  Nick sighed and sat down next to JC, putting his head on JC’s shoulder.

“Um, okay.  Lance, first kiss.”

“First kiss?”  Lance thought back as his hand idly played in Justin’s curls.  The alcohol had brought him to the point that he didn’t even think twice about acting on his feelings for Justin.  “I was ten.  She was twelve.”

“Oooh…older woman,” Justin said, laughing.

“It was okay.  She tried to swallow my tongue I swear to God.  I think that’s why I decided I was gay.”

JC laughed.  “That is enough to scare you.  Go ahead.”

“Justin, best kiss.”

“JC,” Justin said, stretching in Lance’s arms. “The other day. That kiss killed me.”

JC looked pleased.  Nick looked interested.  Lance looked depressed. “I see.  Well, I haven’t kissed you, so you don’t know what a good kiss is,” Lance said lightly.  JC frowned.  Nick looked even more interested.

“Kiss him kiss him kiss him,” Nick chanted.

“Carter, you’re a dumbass.  You’re straight.”

“So?  And are you SURE?”  Nick wiggled his eyebrows and JC giggled.  Nick shifted his weight and suddenly he was laying with his head in JC’s lap.  “Maybe I’m debating turning around and sucking JC’s dick, right here and now.”

JC looked down at Nick, his eyes wide with shock.  Nick took one look at JC’s face and started to laugh, as did Justin.  Lance smiled.  “You are so gullible, Josh.”

“Why don’t you kiss him then, Mr. Big Talk,” JC snapped.  Lance blushed and looked down at Justin. Justin licked his lips expectantly.

“I’ll make him wait…let him dream about it,” Lance said quickly.  “Besides, he’s straight, too. More to drink, please?” He waved his glass.  “I can’t get up.”

“Oh, for God’s sake.”  Nick struggled to his feet and picked up the vodka bottle.  They had given up mixing soda in with the booze over an hour before.  “Justin, you’re a pain in the ass.”

“I like your ass,” JC commented, and Nick turned around to grin at him.

“Thank you, JC.”  He wiggled it a big and flopped back down, his bangs falling into his eyes.  JC lightly brushed them away.

“Watch out, Nick.  He’s trying to seduce you,” Justin said from his place on Lance’s lap.

“Would I have to try very hard, Nicky?”  JC said soothingly, the alcohol speaking for him.  Nick grinned.

“Nah. I’m horny as fuck. I don’t have a hot cheerleader in my bed.”

“Hey, if you fucked Nick, you WOULD have a hot cheerleader in your bed, JC,” Justin realized. “His Halloween costume.”

“Yeah. I could call my dad and tell him I fucked a cheerleader, and he’d like me again,” JC said, sighing.  Nick reached up to touch JC’s cheek.

“He’s stupid, Jayce. You’re awesome.  Being bi has nothing to do with what a great guy you are.”

“Absolutely,” Justin agreed.  “You’ve saved my ass so many times I can’t even count them.”

“What are you gonna do over the holidays?” Lance asked suddenly. JC shrugged.

“Fuck them all. I don’t give a shit.”  He downed his vodka and closed his eyes, suddenly dizzy.

“Justin, get up.  Let JC snuggle with Lance now,” Nick ordered.

“NO. I like it here,” Justin pouted.

“C’mon. We two straight guys will stretch out on the sofa.”  Nick pretty much picked Justin up and dumped him onto the sofa.  He stretched out at the other end.  “You two pretty boys snuggle up.” 

“You’re odd,” Lance decided, but he opened his arms.  JC sighed and moved over to lean against Lance.  “What ARE you gonna do?”

“I don’t know.”

“You can come spend the holidays with me,” Justin suggested. “My mom would LOVE to have you.”

“I should go home,” JC said faintly. “My mom did say she wanted to see me at Christmas.  But I don’t think I can spend a whole month there.”

“Go to your house for Christmas.  You’ll only have to be there like a few weeks after exams,” Lance suggested. “Then go to Justin’s the rest of the time.”

“Yeah! I’m having a New Year’s party…you can be there for that!  I’ll even kiss you at midnight,” Justin said generously.

“Gee, thanks, Justin,” JC said, rolling his eyes. “But maybe I’ll do that.”  He snuggled closer to Lance, giving up his inhibitions for the five minutes of pure happiness in Lance’s arms.  “But I don’t want to think about it now.”

“I’m tired.”  Nick yawned big.  “Where am I sleeping?”

“Here on the sofa.  You’re not getting my bed,” Justin told him.

“You can have my bed. I’ll sleep out here,” JC told Nick.

“No.  Nick can sleep in my bed,” Lance said, and JC felt his voice rumble through his chest.

“God, Nick, everyone wants you in their bed,” Justin pointed out.

“Everyone but you,” Nick said, and Justin kicked him.

“Let’s just stay here,” JC said, yawning and snuggling closer to Lance.  Lance tilted his head back and drank the last drops of his drink, then shifted JC so they were laying down.  JC soon fell asleep on his shoulder, but Lance lay awake for about another hour, watching Justin slowly fall asleep.

 

 

JC woke up at about three in the morning.  Lance’s head was tucked onto his shoulder, a leg haphazardly thrown over JC’s legs.  He sighed. Life wasn’t fair. He slowly scooted out from under Lance and stood, still feeling dizzy.  Justin and Nick were at opposite ends of the sofa, their long legs twisted together.  Nick was curled up into a ball, shivering slightly.  JC slowly made his way down the hall to Justin’s room and grabbed the bedspread.  He then grabbed a blanket from his own bed.  He tucked the two men in under the blankets, then went to his own bed to fall back asleep.

 

Lance’s eyes fluttered open and he realized JC was no longer beside him. He stretched and stood, glancing at the clock on the wall.  Eight-thirty. Too early.  He looked down at Justin, who was asleep on his back, one arm tossed over his head.  Lance knelt by Justin’s side, his finger lightly tracing Justin’s cheek. “What the hell,” he sighed, and pressed his lips to Justin’s forehead.

He got up and slowly walked down the hallway.  JC’s door was open, and he could see JC on the bed. He walked into the room and noticed that the top blanket was not on the bed.  Lance then remembered that it had been tucked around Nick. He had to smile.  JC was probably still drunk, yet he was considerate enough to make sure Nick and Justin were warm without worrying about his own comfort.  Lance went into his bedroom and came back with his favorite blanket, the one his grandmother had crocheted for him. He draped it over JC, then went to his own room. He had enough blankets on his bed to cover an army.

 

JC yawned and stretched, opening one eye.  Ten-thirty. Shit. If they were gonna eat, someone needed to get up and start cooking.  But he was warm and snuggly under a blanket that smelled like Lance. Lance?  Both blue eyes opened, and he looked down at the top blanket.  Lance’s blanket.  Lance’s afghan that his grandmother had made for him.  Tears pricked at JC’s eyes.  God, he wanted Lance.  He fisted the afghan in his hands and closed his eyes, imagining Lance under the blankets with him.  Why…why did Lance have to want Justin?

 

When he finally pulled himself out of bed twenty minutes later, JC wandered into the kitchen to start a pot of coffee. He was surprised to see Nick standing in the room, looking out the window. “Hey,” JC said quietly. Nick jumped.

“Hey.” He smiled at JC. “Happy Thanksgiving.”

“Yeah, you too.”  JC fidgeted for a moment.  “Um…I’m glad you’re here hanging with us, Nick. It’s cool.”

“Thanks for having me.  Being alone in the dorm would suck SO bad.”  Nick looked out the window again.  “It’s still coming down…a bit lighter, though. I’m not even gonna bother trying to rebook my flight.”

“Me either,” JC said, then grinned.

“Good, since you didn’t HAVE a flight,” Nick pointed out, laughing quietly. 

“I’m gonna make coffee.  Can you pull out that teapot and put water in it?  Lance prefers tea in the morning,” JC said.  Nick pulled the teapot down and filled it, putting it on the stove.  He looked at JC.

“You seem to know a lot about what Lance likes.”

JC shrugged. “Yeah, I sure do,” he answered, thinking of Justin.

“I’m bi, too, you know.”

JC dropped the coffee filter, coffee grounds scattering like snowflakes.  He looked at Nick. “Um, what?”

“I’m bi.  No one knows…not even Justin…but I thought you might want to.”

“Are you sure?” JC’s voice ended in a squeak and Nick grinned.

“Yeah, I’m sure.” Nick had to laugh.  “God, JC, you seem so shocked.”

“You’re just so…so…straight,” JC finished weakly.

“We can’t all be fruitcakes like you and Lance.”

“We’re not fruitcakes,” JC snapped, and Nick laughed again.

“Why do you think I feel so comfortable with you guys?  Sexuality is totally not an issue in this house. I like it.”  Nick dug through the closet for a dust brush and dustpan. “Here. You have coffee all over your socks.”

“Thanks.”  JC bent down to clean up his mess.  “Wow…so do you have a…um…”

“No. Not yet.  I did, once, for a short time.  Haven’t found that special person yet…but I am working on it.” Nick gave JC his beautiful smile. “Not in a hurry.”

By the time Lance came into the kitchen a half hour later, JC had the turkey and the chicken in the oven.  He and Nick were going over something in one of Nick’s textbooks.  Justin still had not made an appearance.  “Hey, y’all,” Lance said, groaning.  “I hate hangovers.”

“I have water ready to boil,” JC said.

“I could kiss you,” Lance said blissfully, turning on the stove, and JC almost cried. 

“Well, you should just keep drinking, because you have more to drink later, remember?” Nick said, and Lance groaned again.

“I hate hangovers,” he repeated.  “Where’s Justin?”

“Still asleep in the living room,” Nick said.  Lance sighed and sat down.  He rubbed his temples.

“You have dinner started?” He asked JC, who nodded. 

“I’m not a total idiot in the kitchen,” JC reminded him.  Lance smiled.

“Of course not.”

“I’m hungry,” Justin announced, padding into the kitchen on bare feet.  He collapsed onto Lance’s lap before Lance could stop him.

“God, Justin, can you leave the poor boy alone for five minutes?” Nick asked.  “He’s hungover.”

“So am I. But I’m hungry.  And cold. And Lance makes a good pillow.”  Justin closed his eyes and leaned his head against Lance’s.  JC noticed the pure joy in Lance’s eyes.

“Give him here.”  Nick took Justin by the arm and tumbled him into his own lap. “I’ll hold you, you big baby.  I have more meat on me then Lance.”

JC could have kissed Nick.  “I’ll make you something to eat, Justin,” he said, feeling generous.  “How about pancakes.”

“Yeah.”  Justin wriggled, then settled down against Nick.

“God, I hope I never see you when you’re sick,” Nick teased. “You’re a bigass baby.”

“Yeah, but you think I’m sexy,” Justin said.  “Everyone does.”

“That’s right,” JC said quickly, exchanging glances with Nick. “We are just ITCHING to get you drunk again so we can have a big orgy.  Right, Nick?”

“Yeah.  And I’m gonna go first.”  Nick tried to hide the smile as Justin sat up and looked at them.

“Is there something I should know here?”

“Oh yeah. I’m bisexual,” Nick answered quickly, and JC laughed at the look on Justin’s face.

“One of these things is not like the others…one of these things just doesn’t belong…” Nick sang cheerfully, looking at Justin.

“Damn…so you really woulda sucked JC’s dick last night?” Justin asked.  Nick shrugged.

“He didn’t ask.”

“What if Lance asks?”

“Lance isn’t gonna ask.”  Nick looked at Lance, who was studying the tea that JC had handed to him.

“What if I ask?”

“You’re not gonna ask.”

“I…” Justin opened his mouth, then closed it.  “You’re right.”  Even Lance had to grin.

“Justin, you’re too much.”  Lance stood. “I need a shower.  I’ll be back in time for pancakes.”

“If you need help, apparently Nick would love to help you!” Justin called after him.  Nick dumped him onto the floor.

 

“Wow.  I don’t know if my mom would have something this nice,” Nick said as he sat down at the dinner table.  Lance and JC had done an excellent job coming up with a decent Thanksgiving dinner.

“It looks so good!” Justin sat across from Nick, with Lance and JC at either end.  Nick and Justin both reached for the food, and JC slapped their hands.

“Wait.”  He looked at Lance and nodded.  “We should say grace or something.”

“I’ll do it.” Lance held out his hands, and Nick and Justin each took one.  Nick took JC’s right hand, Justin his left.  Lance bowed his head and sighed.  “Heavenly Father, thank you for this dinner. Thanks for each and every person around this table, and for everything you’ve given us. Please bless us throughout this day, and help us to deal with the problems that day to day life brings before us.  Watch over us for the rest of the weekend, and during the times when we’re not together. Amen.”

“Amen,” JC whispered, watching Lance as he prayed.

 

 

“Any time, Jayce,” Justin said quietly as he hugged JC.  “If you wanna drive down tomorrow, I mean, you do it, okay?”

“Yeah. I know, Justin. Thank you.”  JC held Justin tight, burying his head in Justin’s curls.  “You should go. Your flight just was called.”

“Yeah.”  Justin picked up his backpack. “Call me when you get home, okay? I don’t care if it’s three in the morning.  And I’ll see you, when, the day after Christmas?”

“If not sooner,” JC said, trying to smile.

“I love you, JC.” Justin gave JC one more hug, then headed for his gate.  JC got into his car and zoomed away from the airport.

 

The drive home was long and tedious, and JC had never felt so lonely.  Justin, Nick and Lance were all off to their loving homes for Christmas break, and he felt as if he were a gladiator going into the ring, facing certain death. 

“Joshua.” His mother met him at the door.  “I’m so glad to see you!  I’m so glad you’re home safe.” His mother hugged him long and hard.

“It’s good to be here, Mom.” JC prayed as he hugged his mother. He saw his father step into the hallway.  “Hello, Dad.”

“Josh.”  His father nodded. “Everything okay on the drive?”

“Yes, sir.  I would have been home sooner, but I had to drive Justin to the airport early this morning.”

“Justin Timberlake?  How is he?”  His mother closed the door behind him.

“Good.  He thinks he’s gonna major in Psychology, which makes me laugh.”  JC smiled at his father gratefully as the older man picked up his suitcase.

“Your room is set up just the way it was when you left this summer,” his mother said, opening the bedroom door.  “How are your classes?”

“Good.  Busy. I have a lot of work to do over the break, so I’ll be spending a lot of time in here at my laptop,” he told her.  He looked at his father.  “Unless you need help at the office or anything?”

“No, Josh, you just stay here, thanks.”  His father turned and went to the living room.  JC sat on the edge of the bed, tears welling in his eyes. His mother quickly sat down with him.

“Joshua, he’s trying. Can’t you see that?”

“I see that he’s ashamed to have me coming into his office, Mom. That’s what I see.” He wiped at his eyes. “I’m kinda beat. I’m just gonna take a shower and crash, okay?”

“Of course.”  She ran a hand through his hair. “You know I love you, Joshua. I just feel so torn.”

“I understand, Mom,” JC whispered, ever ready to make the sacrifices necessary.

 

“Josh, it’s for you.” His father waved the phone at him the next morning. “Some boy.”  He practically threw the phone at JC. “I need to take the trash out.” He stormed out of the house.

“I don’t have a boyfriend, Mom,” JC told her before answering the phone.

“Are you sure you don’t want one?” A voice at the other end said.

“Nick!  Hey, man!” JC said happily. “How are you?”

“Good. Tired.  My brother is running the hell out of me, and he’s only twelve.  How are you, JC?”

“Okay.  It’s…hard,” JC said carefully. “I can’t say too much.”

“I understand. I just wanted to see that you got there okay.”

“I did, Nick, thanks.” JC closed his eyes, picturing Nick…Justin…Lance.  “It’s weird.”

“I bet.  Well, if you need to talk, call. I’ll be in and out of the house all vacation.”

“Okay, thanks.  Talk to you later.” JC hung up and smiled. Just hearing Nick’s kind voice made everything better.

Lance called later that night, and Justin called the next morning.  His father got angrier and angrier with each call, though his mother tried to smooth things over.  JC decided he didn’t care. His family might not have liked him, but he had friends who did.  Christmas Eve was disastrous; they went to church and every time his mother tried to brag about JC’s accomplishments, his father made snide comments to put him down.

By the time gifts were unwrapped on Christmas morning, JC had made up his mind. He hadn’t really unpacked, so it took him only twenty minutes to gather his things together.  He kissed his mother’s cheek. “Thanks for everything, Mom.  I’ll call you from Justin’s.”

His mother dropped the potato she was peeling. “What?”

“I’m leaving, Mom. It’s what everyone wants.  It will be better for you. Give Grammy and Grandpa my love.” He kissed her cheek again and put on his coat.

“Joshua, you can’t leave! It’s Christmas!”

“I’m not feeling the Christmas spirit here, Mom.  I need to get out.  Tell Dad…” JC swallowed deeply.  “Tell Dad I love him. No matter what, okay? I’ll call.”  He picked up his bags and left before she could say anything else.

 

Justin chattered on in a private rap as he went to answer his doorbell. He wore his new teddy bear slippers, a gag gift from his younger brother.  He rapped to the upturned teddy bear faces as he opened the door. His eyes widened. “Jayce?  Holy shit, man!  What are you doing here?  I mean, come in.”  He stepped aside. “Why didn’t you call?”

“I didn’t have time. I needed out.  I’m sorry it’s so late.”  JC tiredly rubbed his temples.  “Will your mom be mad?”

“Hell, no. She’s been hoping you’d show up early, for God’s sake. I TOLD you she likes you more than she likes me,” Justin said, smiling.  “You’ll have to crash with me, though; we don’t have my brother moved out of his room for you yet.”

“That’s fine. I’m so tired I wouldn’t even notice.”  JC followed Justin back to his bedroom.  “Um, Justin? Are those teddy bear slippers?”  JC smiled his first real smile of the month of December.

“Yeah.  And don’t talk shit about them…my brother gave them to me.” Justin tried to ignore JC’s chuckling, but he finally turned around and faked a punch. “Shut up, JC!”

“God, Justin…you are like a sight for sore eyes, man,” JC said softly. He pulled Justin into a hug. “Thank you. Thanks for being here for me.”

“No sweat, dude.  Like I woulda passed exams without you. Like I woulda found an awesome place to live without you.” Justin hugged JC back.  “Go take a shower. I’ll get the bed ready. It’s almost midnight, anyway. I’m kinda tired, too.”

JC stumbled into the shower and quickly cleaned up, then wandered back to Justin’s room. He climbed into Justin’s king-sized bed and sighed.  “God, it feels good to just relax.”

Justin reached over and rubbed JC’s hair.  “Go to sleep, dude.  It will look better tomorrow.”

“Yeah,” JC said, snuggling into Justin’s touch. He slowly relaxed, letting the worries of the previous days fall from his shoulders under Justin’s caring caress.

 

JC slept until almost noon the day after Christmas.  When he wandered out into the kitchen, he smiled sheepishly at Justin’s mother. “Hi.”

“Joshua Chasez! I’m so happy to see you!”  Lynn Harless gave him a big hug.  He welcomed the motherly embrace.  “You’re here early, but I’m glad.”

“Sorry I slept the morning away,” he said, rubbing down his bedhead.  She laughed.

“It’s vacation. You’re supposed to.”  She poured him a cup of coffee.  “Justin ran out to the store with Jon and Paul. They’ll be back soon.” She sat down with JC at the table. “So things didn’t go very well at home.”

“That’s an understatement.”  JC sighed and turned his coffee cup in circles.  “I should have known.”

“You’re welcome here as long as you like, Josh,” Lynn told him, squeezing his hand. “You can help Justin plan this big New Year’s shindig.  He’s inviting everyone he knows, I swear.  That girlfriend of his is coming out, too…isn’t her name Britney or something?”

“Yes, that’s her. She’s very nice…a little ditzy, but nice.”  JC smiled.

“He needs someone right now.  Thanks for looking out for him, Josh. I know you’ve kinda taken him in.”

“Well, he’s a handful. But Lance helps.”

“Lance…that’s the other boy you live with, right?”

“Yes,” JC said, and hoped his feelings didn’t show.  Lynn smiled. 

“I take it he’s something special?”

“You could say that,” JC answered, sighing.

 

JC helped Lynn move Jon’s things into the tiny den and then he got settled into Justin’s brother’s bedroom. He was working on his laptop when Justin returned with his stepfather.  “Hey, you’re finally up!” Justin leaned in the doorway. “Quit working. It’s vacation.”

“Shut up,” JC said affectionately, but he closed down the computer.  “I hear you’re planning a big party.”

“Yeah…my friends from high school…some other people…Brit’s coming.” Justin made a face.  “Mom said she can’t sleep with me…everyone needs to crash in the family room.  How embarrassing.”

“Maybe she doesn’t want to hear how loud Britney is,” JC suggested, laughing.  Justin frowned.

“Ha ha.  Remind me why I invited you here?”

“Because you secretly want my body,” JC said, stretching.  Justin rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, whatever.”

 

JC spent the next week sleeping late, working on his homework, and playing around with Justin and some of his friends.  He forgot a lot of his problems and soon just let himself enjoy the feeling of being welcomed.  Justin was a wreck by New Year’s Eve. He had over sixty people coming to his party, and he was frantic that something would go wrong.

“Do we have enough to drink? Mom, you went to the beverage place, right?” Justin asked, peering into the large refrigerator.

“Yes, Justin,” Lynn sighed.  She looked at JC.  “I HAVE to take him in. He’s my son. But you willingly live with this?”

“MOM!” Justin whined.  JC ruffled Justin’s curls.

“Yeah…it’s kinda like having a puppy.”

“I’m telling Lance!  He’ll kick your butt!” Justin yelled, and JC laughed.

“Justin, don’t you have an errand to run?”  Lynn looked at the clock, then looked at Justin.

“Oh, yeah.” Justin grabbed the car keys.  “Jayce, Mom has some FedEx stuff we need to grab over at the airport.  Let’s go.”

“Don’t they deliver?” JC asked as he pulled on his shoes.

“I don’t know what happened, but they called and asked us to come over and get it,” Lynn said, shrugging.

“We’ll be back soon.”  Justin kissed Lynn’s cheek, as did JC.

“Be careful.  Maybe Josh should drive,” Lynn said.

“No. I’m driving and I’ll be fine.” Justin bounced out the door.  JC rolled his eyes and followed him.

 

“So…ya think I can sneak Brit up to my room?” Justin asked as he pulled into the airport parking lot.

“I’m not covering for you,” JC said immediately, though he knew he would if Justin asked.

“God…it’s not like I’m a kid or something,” Justin said, pouting. They got out of the car and headed for the airport.

“Yeah, you’re such an old man at eighteen,” JC teased.

“ALMOST nineteen, thank you very much,” Justin pointed out.  “Oh, look. There’s what we have to pick up.”

“Justin, I don’t see FedEx boxes. I see…hey!”  JC yelled happily, running over to tackle Nick.  “What are you doing here?”

“We came to ring in the New Year with you,” Nick said, grinning.  “I’ve been here about fifteen minutes, and Lance’s flight got in an hour ago.”

“Hi, Josh.”  Lance hugged JC hard.  “How are you?  Justin called and told us you came in early.”

“I’m doing better.  His house is like therapy or something,” JC said, welcoming the smell and feel that was Lance before finally pulling away.

“Don’t you mean you NEED therapy after living in his house?” Nick asked innocently.  Justin faked a punch and they began to wrestle.  Lance sighed.

“Still babysitting?”

“Absolutely,” JC answered, grinning.

 

“So, I guess I’m not getting my kiss,” JC said with a sigh, watching Britney and Justin joke around under a sprig of mistletoe that was left from Christmas.  “He promised me a kiss, but it doesn’t look like I’ll get it.”

“I’LL kiss you, Jayce,” Nick promised.  “My lips are out of practice, but I’ll kiss you.”

“Me, too,” Lance said solemnly, and JC sighed. If only it were New Year’s Eve EVERY day.

“I’m gonna get more to drink.”  Nick hopped up from the sofa and headed to the kitchen.

“Haven’t gotten over him yet, huh?” JC asked gently.  Lance shook his head, biting his bottom lip.

“I think I am…then he does something and it’s like BAM, I love him again,” he sighed. 

“I understand,” JC said quietly.

“And he’s a tease.  I wonder if he isn’t bi, you know?”

“You’d think he woulda come out to us by now,” JC pointed out.

“True, but Justin is unpredictable.”

“C’mon, guys. It’s three minutes to midnight.”  Nick leaned down to talk softly. “If there’s gonna be kissing, I don’t think it should be here.”  He tugged on JC’s sleeve.  JC stood.

“Fine.”  He followed Nick, Lance close on his heels.  They went into the small laundry room and closed the door. They could soon hear the crowd counting down the seconds to midnight.

Nick pretended to flex his lips. “Okay…who gets me first?”

Lance laughed.  “You’re the oldest, Jayce, you do the honors.”

“Gee, thanks,” JC mumbled.  They heard everyone start to yell, and Nick smiled at JC.

“Happy New Year, JC.”  He gave JC a hug, and a quick kiss on the lips.

“You too, Nick.”  JC pulled away and watched Nick sweep a giggling Lance into a dip before kissing him hard and fast.

“Happy New Year, white boy.”  Nick kissed Lance’s cheek, then released him. Lance turned to JC.

“Happy New Year, Josh.”

“What the hell…Happy New Year.” JC closed his eyes and made his brain record every minute, every touch, every sensation.  Lance’s arms went around him and his soft lips touched JC’s.  JC knew it was just a momentary thing, but it felt like hours.  Lance’s mouth was warm, and he felt Lance’s soft fingers on the back of his neck.

“Dammit, you started the orgy without me!” Justin burst into the laundry room, closing the door behind him.  “Here I am.  Ready to kiss.”

“We did it without you,” Nick said as JC and Lance pulled apart.

“Well, we’ll have to do it again, then. Happy New Year, sexy boys.” Justin kissed them one by one, a big smile on his face.  JC sighed as Lance and Nick laughed and joked with Justin, believing he could still feel Lance’s touch lingering on his mouth.

 

JC fed quarters into the meter, then looked around him. He wasn’t too familiar with this part of town, but the directions on the flyer were fairly easy to follow.  “Clark Kent’s,” he read, looking up at the sign. He sighed and pushed the door open.

“We’re not open!”  A voice yelled from the direction of the bar.  JC peered through the darkened room.

“I’m not here to drink. I…uh…I’m here for the job.  The pianist…on Sundays?”

“C’mere, Kid.”  JC saw a hand waving him over.  A short man, older than he was, was standing behind the bar drying glasses.  “What’s your name?”

“JC Chasez.”

“Chasez…nice to meet ya.  Chris Kirkpatrick.”  He held out his hand and JC shook it.  “I run the bar, and occasionally Joey lets me do my stand-up routine onstage.  JOE!”  Chris screamed.  “Someone’s here for ya!”  He looked back at JC.  “You’re a student?”

JC nodded. “Grad student. Music major.”

“Very cool.”  Chris nodded and smiled.  “Very cool.”

“Yeah?”  A man with a dark beard and red-tipped hair came from backstage.

“This is JC Chasez. He’s here for the Sunday job.  JC, this is Joey Fatone, the owner.”

“You play piano?” Joey shook hands with JC.  Chris rolled his eyes.

“Duh, Joey, if he didn’t he wouldn’t be here.”

“Ya can never be too sure.”  Joey motioned to the piano. “Play something.”

JC sighed and sat down, flexing his fingers. He thought for a moment, then started Billy Joel’s “Lullaby.”  After a few bars, he moved into Elton John’s “Benny and the Jets,” and finished with a slow blues melody.  He looked at Joey expectantly. 

“Well, damn,” Chris muttered.  “He’s good.”

“Can you sing?” Joey demanded.

“If you really need me to,” JC said.

“JC…what’s your real name?”

“Joshua…Josh Chasez,” JC answered.

“JC Chasez is redundant.  Put him on the sign as Josh Chasez,” Joey told Chris.  “See you next Sunday,” he told JC, and went backstage.  JC grinned at Chris.

 

“JOSH!”  JC looked up at the stands and saw Lance waving with his whole body. He climbed up the risers and pushed his way to where Lance was saving him a seat.  “I thought you’d never get here.”

“I had an appointment.”  JC looked down to the bench. “Justin starting?”

“Yeah.  Nick, too.”  Lance pointed.  “There they are.”

Justin looked up and caught JC’s eye.  He made a face, then pointed Lance and JC out to Nick. Nick waved and turned around, doing a little booty dance.  JC rolled his eyes and laughed.  “I got a job.”

“You what?” Lance turned to stare at him.

“Yeah. Today.  I’ll be playing piano Sunday nights at Clark Kent’s.”

“That’s the new jazz club, huh?”

“Yeah.”  JC shrugged. “I don’t have class until ten Monday morning, so it’s all good.  They’re paying me to fool around at the piano.  Hell, I’d pay THEM to do that.”

“Josh, that is fantastic.”  Lance squeezed JC’s knee.  “We’ll have to…” he stopped talking as he looked down at the gymnasium floor.  Justin and Britney were in the middle of a heated discussion. Her ponytail flew as she shook her head angrily, and she punctuated her words with a flourish of her pompoms.  Justin looked her up and down and snapped something.  She slapped his face and turned away.

“Well…uh…THAT was interesting,” JC said finally. 

“Yeah…” Lance trailed off, watching Justin take a few practice shots before the game began.  “Where was I? Uh, yeah.  We’ll have to do dinner to celebrate.”

“Really?” JC asked, his heart leaping into his ears.

“Yeah…me, you, Justin, Nick…a celebration.”

“Right.”  JC’s heart sunk back into his sneakers.

 

“You had a good game,” Lance said when Justin walked in the door.  JC and Lance were watching TV in the living room.

“I sucked royally, thank you,” Justin snapped.  He went into the bathroom, slamming the door behind him.

“Drama queen,” JC sighed.  He was getting a little tired of Justin’s moods, and the way that Lance would cater to him. 

“He’s young,” Lance said, changing the channel.

“Lance, he’s only two years younger than you!  Don’t make excuses for him.”  JC realized he was almost yelling. “I’m sorry.  Forgive me.”

“No problem.”  Lance looked at JC oddly, then turned back to his television show.

Justin made himself a sandwich, then flopped onto the sofa next to JC.  “Sorry about that, Lance. I had a shitty night.”

“No problem,” Lance said again.  JC nudged Justin a little.

“We saw you talking with Britney.  You guys break up?”

“I don’t know.  She was being a bitch, yelling at me because I like to spend time with Nick and you guys. She said I loved you guys more than I love her, and I said maybe that was true.”

“That’s when she hit you?”

“Yeah.” Justin had to smile. “She’s sexy when she’s angry.”

“You’ll hook up again.”  JC stole a piece of Justin’s sandwich. “You’re too horny to go without for long.”

“Thanks a lot, JC,” Justin said, and Lance laughed.

 

“Dude, you’ll be fine,” Chris said encouragingly.  JC straightened his tie and nodded.  The room was about half full, and Chris told him that a lot of the professors liked to come in a bit later.  “Actually, I hope you’re NOT fine. When an act bombs, Joey gives me extra time onstage.”

“Great,” JC said weakly, and Chris grinned.

“Go get ‘em.”  Chris gave JC a shove towards the piano.

JC sat and stared at the keys. He felt as if every bit of music had left his body.  He could hardly remember where middle C was on the keyboard. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Without even thinking, his fingers began to pick out a melody. He sighed and relaxed.  He could do this. Music was breathing for him.

 

Two hours later Chris came over and told him to take a break. “Man, you’re great!  Everyone is loving you.”

“Really?”  JC was pleased. 

“Yeah. Especially that guy at the table in the corner. He told me to bring you a drink on him, but I told him you drink for free.  He told me to bring it anyway.”  Chris plunked a bottle of beer down on top of the bar.

“Thanks,” JC said, his eyes wandering to the corner Chris had pointed out. He froze when he saw Lance’s ex-boyfriend Alex raising his glass.  JC frowned and looked down at the keyboard.

“Hey.” He heard Alex’s footsteps but didn’t look up.

“I’ll let you two get to talking,” Chris said, going back to his bar.

“Hello, Alex.”  JC looked up, his eyes blue steel.  “What the fuck do you want?”

“Whoa…just saying hi.  And appreciating the music. You’re awesome. I come here all the time and I’ve never heard anything like you.”

“Thank you.  What the fuck do you want?”

Alex held up his hands. “I’m sorry, okay? I should not have done what I did.  It wasn’t fair to you or to Lance.  I just saw you…and you looked lonely…”

“And you were horny.”

“And I was horny,” Alex agreed with a grin. “Hey, we both enjoyed it, and there was no harm done, right?”

“Lance hated my guts for about an hour. I’d say there was harm done,” JC snapped.

“Damn, Josh, you have it bad for our little country boy, don’t you?” Alex teased. “You tell him?”

“No,” JC said finally.  Alex removed his sunglasses and leaned on the top of the piano.

“Tell him, Josh.  Lance is a great guy.  I fucked up royally letting him go.  He’s worth it.”

 

For the next two weeks, JC seriously debated about telling Lance his true feelings.  Justin was on again off again with Britney, and he could see Lance’s misery and jealousy. If he told Lance, he himself would feel better…but it would make Lance feel guilty about not loving JC back. It would make things even more stressful in the apartment.

“If it’s snowing tomorrow morning, I’ll tell him.  If it’s not, I won’t,” JC decided one Friday night as he got ready for bed.  He looked out the window and saw no sign of clouds.  “There. There’s my answer.  I’m just not meant to tell him.”  JC realized he was talking to himself and rolled his eyes. “I’m going crazy.”

 

At about three in the morning, JC was shaken awake by an odd sound.  First a thumping, then moaning. “Holy shit,” he muttered, sitting up angrily.

“Oh…fuck yes…don’t fucking stop…please…” he heard Justin begging.  Justin had gone to a sorority party earlier that night, and JC had gone to bed before he got home.  JC frowned. If Justin was with Lance in that room, he didn’t know WHAT he’d do.  He then remembered that Lance had been fast asleep when HE had gone to bed, so it probably wasn’t Lance.  JC had to grin as Justin continued to beg.

“Go Britney,” he said, pulling the pillow over his head.

 

“You hear that last night?” JC said as soon as he entered the kitchen.  Lance rolled his eyes.

“Yes. I think I liked it better when she was making all the noise.”

“I’m sorry, Lance,” JC said gently.  “I’m sure that he…” JC’s voice faded away as he looked out the window and saw a flurry hit the glass. “Shit,” he muttered, taking a deep breath.  “Lance…”

“Morning, guys.”  Nick walked into the kitchen, rubbing his head sleepily. “Is there orange juice?”

“In the fridge,” Lance said, staring at him.  “Justin still in bed?”

“Yeah.”  Nick stretched and JC saw a dark mark on the skin behind his ear.  JC’s mouth fell open.

“Where did you sleep?” Lance asked, confused.

“In Justin’s room.”  Nick started to drink from the carton, then thought better of it.

“Where’s Britney?” Lance asked.  Nick looked at him oddly.

“In her room, I suppose.  She wasn’t here last night.” 

JC sat down hard and Nick gave him a small smile and shrugged. “Oh my God,” he whispered.

“You and Justin…last night?” Lance said weakly.  Nick nodded.

“Yeah…we wanted to tell you together, but…”

“How long?”  Lance demanded.

“Lance, we…”

“How…long…Nick?”

“About three weeks,” Nick finished quietly.  “We kinda sorta like fell in love or something.”

Lance kicked his chair back.  “Justin’s straight.  He doesn’t like men.”

“No, Lance, Justin is bisexual. He’s wondered, and we talked, and then we kissed, and then…well, he’s not straight,” Nick finished.  He looked at Lance.  “Is that a problem?”

“Fuck, yes, it’s a problem.  Justin’s straight, dammit!”  Lance looked at Nick and bit his lip. “He’s straight.” He turned to leave the kitchen and ran smack into Justin.  “You fucking slut.” He hit Justin’s face with all his might, then hurried down to his room, slamming the door behind him.

 

“Fuck!”  Justin yelled, falling back against the wall as he put a hand up to his face. “What the hell was that all about?”

“Sit down, Justin, let me look.”  Nick guided Justin to a chair as JC put some ice in a towel.  “Shit.  He clocked you good.”

“No fucking shit, Nick. Dammit!” Justin gingerly pressed the ice to his cheek. “What was that?”

“Lance is a little upset,” JC said softly.

“Apparently!” Justin yelled.  “Why did he hit me? And why did he call me a slut?”

Nick looked at JC.  “I’m gonna go crash in Justin’s room for a bit.”  He touched Justin’s shoulder, then left the kitchen. Justin looked at JC.

“What’s going on, Jayce?” His voice was quiet, and JC could see tears in the blue eyes.  He knew the tears were more than just pain.  He knew that Justin respected Lance more than anyone else, and his feelings had been hurt.

“Justin…Nick told us. About you and him.”

“Oh.”  Justin closed his eyes.  “But why did Lance hit me?”

“Lance…Lance has had a thing for you for weeks, Justin. Months.”  JC closed his eyes to block the pain of the words.  “He’s never done anything because he figured you were straight.”

“Lance…wanted me?” Justin’s mouth fell open.  “I never knew…oh shit.”

“Of course you never knew.  He covered it up.”

“I mean, he was always doing nice things for me…but you do them, too, and I know you don’t want me that way…do you?” Justin asked, and JC smiled.

“No, I don’t, Justin.  You’re my little brother…that’s all.”  JC studied his fingernails.  “So, basically Lance has been pining away for you, not wanting to even pretend to make a move…and then this happens with Nick.”  JC looked at Justin. “Just how DID this happen with Nick?”

“Well…we…we got to talking…and we were just getting so close, you know?  And then I found out he was bi, and I did a lot of thinking…and it just happened.”  Justin smiled, then winced from the pain. “He’s awesome, Jayce. We’re both young and all…but he’s great. I’m so happy when I’m with him.”

“That’s good, Justin,” JC said. “What about Britney?”

“We broke up…I couldn’t hide it anymore. I didn’t want to be with her. I wanted to be with Nick.”  Justin’s lip quivered. “But Lance…God, I feel like shit.”

“You should,” JC said before he thought, remembering the pain on Lance’s face.

“But I didn’t know!” Justin whined.

 

Lance lay on his bed, staring at the ceiling. He heard Justin’s voice rise and fall.  “But I didn’t know!” Justin said.  Lance sighed. He couldn’t believe it.  All along Justin had been bisexual. He hadn’t known it all the time, but he had been.  Lance could have made his move weeks earlier, and Justin might have gone along with it.

Lance rolled over and buried his face in the pillow. Who was he trying to kid?  Justin would NEVER have gone for him. He wasn’t Justin’s type. Not even close to good enough. And now Lance was just so ANGRY.  Angry at Justin, angry at Nick, angry at JC, even though he knew that JC was stuck in the middle of everything.  Lance’s heart tore and he finally cried into the pillow.

 

The rest of the week was pure hell for everyone involved.  Justin only came home to get his things and sleep, and a few of the nights he slept on the floor in Nick’s dorm room, unable to deal with the silent treatment Lance was giving him.  And Lance was giving him the silent treatment to the best of his abilities.  When Lance left his room, which was rare during the times Justin was in the apartment, he wouldn’t talk to him or look at him. He just walked around looking miserable.

JC was torn apart.  No one was really to blame in the situation, yet two of the people he loved most in the world were absolutely unhappy.  He hated seeing the way Lance was moping, hated seeing the way his eyes watched Justin when Justin wasn’t looking. He knew Justin felt guilty for something that wasn’t his fault.  He didn’t know what to say or do, so he just existed, spending most of his time at the music department or at Clark Kent’s, talking to Chris.

“So…why don’t you move out?”  Chris asked one night as JC helped him wash glasses.

“It will be impossible to find a place right now…and I don’t have the money,” JC said softly. “I can barely get money to Lance for rent as it is.”

“I bet Joe could find you a place. He knows people,” Chris told him. “He’d help ya out.”

“I know he would. But I can’t desert Justin that way.” JC sighed and plunged a glass into the hot water.  “This is fucked up.”

“Yes, it is.  And why haven’t you told this Lance guy how YOU feel?”

JC looked up sharply.  “Am I so transparent?”

“Well, yeah,” Chris said, grinning. “Every time you even say his name, your eyes light up like a Christmas tree.”  JC blushed.  “Maybe hearing your feelings will help him get over the kid.”

“I doubt it.  It’s not easy playing second fiddle to Justin.  Trust me,” JC replied.

 

“Hey.”  Justin fell into the chair next to Nick. They had met at the library to study, though Justin was in no mood to open a book.  His grades were slipping because of his inability to think about anything except what had happened at the apartment.

“Hey.” Nick took off his glasses and looked at Justin. “Any better?”

“Um, yeah. Lance actually talked to me today. He told me to move my fucking basketball clothes out of the hallway before he threw them out. I think I’m making progress.”  Justin buried his face in his hands.

“We need to talk, Justin,” Nick said gently, and Justin looked up quickly. “You need to resolve this thing with Lance. For him, for JC, for me.”

“For you?”

“I hate seeing you so torn up. And you’re never one hundred percent with me. Your grades are dropping, your basketball game isn’t as good as it should be.”  Nick began to gather his books. “Until you fix this, I don’t think we should hang out.”

Justin’s mouth fell open. “Nick…”

“Justin…” Nick put his head close to Justin’s so he could whisper. “You know how I feel for you. THAT’S why I’m saying this. I am worried to hell about you. Fix it.”  He got up and walked away. 

“Fuck,” Justin mumbled, slamming his history book shut.

 

When Justin got back to the apartment, JC was nowhere to be found. He had been out a lot during the week, and Justin hadn’t even really thought twice about it.  He saw a light under Lance’s door and took a deep breath.  “Lance?”  Justin knocked on the door.  “It’s Justin.  Can we talk?”

“Go talk to Nick.”

“For fuck’s sake, quit being such a girl!”  Justin finally yelled, exasperated.  Lance threw the door open.

“A girl? What do you know about girls? You don’t LIKE girls anymore, remember, Justin? You like NICK.”  Lance’s green eyes smoldered.

“God, Lance, I’m sorry, okay? I didn’t know!” Justin’s eyes were sad. “I didn’t know. If I had known, I…well…you wouldn’t have found out the way you did, that’s for sure. I’m sorry.  I had no clue.  I mean, why would someone like you fall for me?”

“Someone like me?” Lance laughed.  “Justin, you’re a Golden Boy.  So is Nick. I’m just a math nerd.”

“A math nerd who is smart and fun and sexy and caring and nice,” Justin told him.  “Trust me, I know all about how great you are.  Even if I wouldn’t have figured it out myself, Jayce woulda made sure I knew.”

“Josh?”  Lance’s face was blank.  Justin could have shot himself.

“Never mind. This is about us. I am sorry, okay…but I can’t deny my feelings for Nick.  That’s just how it is…and I want you to forgive me so we can be friends again.”  Justin pouted and Lance’s heart sank.

“God…Justin…of course I forgive you.” Lance pulled Justin into a hug, feeling Justin sigh against him.  “I’m sorry for being a bitch.”

“It’s okay,” Justin said, relieved. “It’s okay.”

“What was that about Josh, Justin?” Lance pulled back.  Justin frowned.

“He’s gonna kill me.  Okay…um, yeah…so ya know all this time you’ve been wanting me?  He’s wanted you…like since the first time we walked into this apartment.  JC is like head over heels over you, Poofu-Bear.”

Lance slowly sat down, shaking his head. “JC?  What in the world would he want with me?

“I think he mentioned your modesty, once,” Justin said with a grin. “Lance, he has been like in love with you FOREVER.  He watches you whenever you don’t look. He does things to make you happy. He knew how you felt about me, right?”  Lance slowly nodded.  “And I bet he did nothing to discourage you, right? Because he wants you happy.”

“Shit.”  Lance stared into space, trying to process this new information.

“I need to call Nick.  Think about JC, okay?”  Justin stood.  Lance nodded.

“Yeah,” he said vaguely.  Justin left the room.

Josh? Josh was in love with him?  Lance picked up a framed picture that sat on his desk. It was Nick, Justin, Lance and JC on New Year’s Eve, at Justin’s party.  His finger traced JC’s face.  JC was handsome…and sexy.  Music seemed to flow through his every pore.  And he was so intelligent, and kind.  Lance fell back onto the bed, studying the picture.

 

“Thank you,” JC said into the microphone, hardly even hearing the applause. “I’m gonna take a break. I’ll be back in about fifteen minutes.”

“Hey there, Piano Man.”  Alex leaned on the piano, grinning.  “How are you?”

“Hey, Alex,” JC said with a sigh.  “Not so good.”  Alex was a regular at Clark Kent’s now, and he and JC had become friends of a sort.

“You haven’t told him yet?”

“God, Alex, how could I?  He’s finally talking to Justin…even to Nick…but he’s all but ignoring me.  Probably mad about the thing with Justin, though I don’t know why it’s MY fault.”  JC rubbed his temples. 

“You need to cheer up, man.  Your music’s suffering. You’re playing all this depressing shit.” Alex glared at him.  “I think you need a good fuck.”

JC burst out laughing and Alex grinned.  “You WOULD think that, Alex.”

 

Lance watched JC from a corner of the bar, sighing as he finished his soda.  JC went through the motions of playing, but the music wasn’t important to him that night…that much was obvious.  Lance had walked around for hours before getting up the courage to walk into Clark Kent’s, and even then he didn’t know if he’d be able to say anything to Josh.  Lance had thought long and hard over the past week, ever since Justin had opened his eyes to JC’s true feelings.  They were so obvious.  And instead of opening up to JC and seeing where things could go, Lance had closed down, built a wall around his emotions.  All because of…

“Alex,” Lance whispered, watching his ex walk up and lean on the piano. Apparently things had been worked out between Alex and JC, because they were talking.  And JC laughed.  Laughed for real.  Alex had made him laugh.  Jealousy boiled over inside of Lance’s soul.

“Need anything else?”  The bartender wandered over.

“Who is that?” Lance pointed to the piano.

“Uh, Josh Chasez…the musician,” the bartender said as if Lance were an idiot.

“No, the guy WITH him.”

“I dunno.  Uh, wait, yeah I do.”  The bartender snapped his fingers.  “C’mon…think, Chris…oh yeah.  His name’s Alex.”

“He’s a friend of Josh’s?”

“I guess so.” Chris shrugged.

“They an item?” Lance looked up at Chris.  Chris smiled.

“I don’t think so.  Josh has got the hots for someone else.”  Chris looked at Lance for the first time. “Your name wouldn’t happen to be Lance, would it?”

“How did you know that?”

“I hear about you ALL the time, dude. He’s described your hair and eyes like a million times.” Chris laughed.  “He’s got it bad.”  He looked over at the piano.  “So, go get your man, okay?  I don’t like that Alex guy…he looks like bad news.”

“If you only knew.”  Lance gave Chris a huge tip and stood.

 

“C’mon, Josh…you get outta here at what, one?  You could be at my place at one-thirty…my roommate’s out for the night,” Alex said in a cajoling tone.

“Alex, I am not going home with you.”  JC shook his head, laughing.

“That’s right. He’s not. He’s going home with me,” a low voice said behind Alex. Alex slowly turned around, smiling.

“Hello, Lance.”

“I think you and I need to talk.” Lance looked at JC, who was staring at him wide-eyed.

“Um, okay. I get outta here at one,” JC said almost apologetically.

“I’ll wait.” Lance looked at Alex.

“Okay, so, yeah. I’m outtie.  I’ll see you around, Josh.”  Alex walked away from the piano.

“I, um, I need to play now,” JC said softly. Lance nodded.

“I’ll be over there.”  Lance pointed to his table.

 

JC bit his lip as he left Clark Kent’s. He just knew that Lance would be gone.  He knew it had all been a figment of his imagination.  “Hey.”  JC jumped at the sound of Lance’s voice.

“Hey,” he replied.

“Is it too cold to walk a bit?”

“Nah.”  JC pulled his coat and zippered it, shoving a hat onto his head.  “We can walk.”

They walked in silence for a long moment, their breath making little clouds in the dark.  “So…Justin told me some things,” Lance said finally.

“Oh,” JC said weakly, wishing the world would just end right there and then.

“I’m sorry I didn’t know.”  Lance stopped walking and turned to JC. “I know what it’s like to want someone like that. I’m sorry.”

“It’s nothing for you to apologize about.”

“Yeah, there’s a lot for me to apologize about.” Lance looked at his feet.  “Josh, I’ve been avoiding you because of what Justin told me. That’s wrong. I should have just talked to you about it.  You’re one of my best friends.”

“Right,” JC said, his heart sinking. Friends.

“And you had to hear me talk about Justin, watch how I pined away for him.  And you never said anything. That had to hurt.”

“Yeah,” JC admitted. “But it’s in the past now.  Justin has Nick, Nick has Justin, and everyone is friends again.”

“And I have you,” Lance said softly. JC stared at him.

“Of course you do. We’re best friends, like you said.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t see it, Josh,” Lance said softly, taking a step towards JC.  JC felt his knees start to shake.  “I was blinded by what I thought was love for Justin…when all along I fell in love with you and didn’t even know it.”

“Wh-what?”  JC stammered.  He didn’t feel the cold. He felt hot fire running through his body.  He shook his head. “You don’t love me.”

“I do. I love you, Josh. It took me all this time to realize it.  You and I were both babysitting Justin.  I fell in love with the idea of him…but he’s not right for me.  We’re so different.  You and I…we’re so alike.”  Lance smiled.  “I…I was stupid for not seeing it.”

“Lance…” JC said, then tried again.  “Don’t say this because you feel you have to.  I…”

“God, JC, shut up,” Lance said, reaching up and pulling off JC’s hat. He slowly ran his fingers through JC’s hair. “I said, I’m in love with you.  Now, do you love me back or not?”

“Don’t fuck with me, Lance,” JC whispered. Lance slowly shook his head.

“I’m not.”

The tenderness with which Lance’s lips met JC’s put the New Year’s kiss to shame.  Lance put his arms around JC and JC fell into the kiss wholeheartedly, putting months of love and passion and yearning into every part of him.  Lance’s hands wove through JC’s hair, pulling him as close as possible.  “Lance,” JC finally whispered, leaning his forehead against Lance’s.  “God, I just feel like…I feel like bawling my eyes out or something. You don’t know…”

“I DO know.  And it doesn’t matter now.  I’ve got you and I’m not letting you go.” Lance’s gloved hand reached down for JC’s.  “You’re stuck with me.”

“Can we be stuck together back at the apartment? It’s cold,” JC said suddenly, and Lance laughed.

“Of course we can.”  Still holding hands, they hurried back to the apartment

 

Lance quietly unlocked the door and he and JC slipped into the apartment.  JC cursed as he tripped over a pair of boots. “Dammit, doesn’t Nick have his OWN place to sleep in?”

“I have a feeling we’re gonna have a fourth roommate next semester,” Lance sighed.  He looked at JC.  “Josh, I really wanna talk about this with you…but I am so damn tired.  Can we blow off class tomorrow and stay in and talk?”

“Sure,” JC said, his stomach doing gymnastics.  “I’m, uh, I’m gonna get ready for bed.”

Lance reached out and grabbed JC by the coat, pulling him close. He kissed JC, the kiss full of passion and heat.  “You’re sleeping with me, right?”  His voice was low and husky.

“Yes,” JC breathed, ready to sleep in the snow if Lance wanted him to.

 

JC changed clothes three times before deciding on his flannel pajama pants with the music notes on them.  They were kinda girly, but he figured Lance wouldn’t care.  He pulled on a tshirt, then changed it to a wifebeater. It was cold outside, but Lance kept his room like an oven.  He padded down to Lance’s room.  He saw that the door to Lance’s bathroom was closed, so he flopped onto the bed and began to flip through one of Lance’s math books, for something to do. 

Lance opened the door and jumped. “God, Josh, you scared me.  I didn’t know you were in here.”  He blushed as he looked down at himself. “Um, yeah, okay, I look like a six year old.”

“You look adorable,” JC said, smiling as he looked at Lance in his Dr. Seuss pajamas.  “I didn’t know you owned those.”

“I don’t advertise it. I love Dr. Seuss,” Lance replied, though JC already knew that.  “Am I really adorable?”  Lance lay down next to JC.  JC closed the math book and looked at Lance.

“Lance…you don’t know how many things I think you are. Adorable is the tip of the iceberg.”  JC felt brave enough to tell the truth.  Lance sighed happily, smiling in a sleepy way.

“Thank you.”  Lance yawned.  “Sleepy.”

“Let’s get under the covers.”  JC turned off the light and he and Lance climbed under the blankets.  JC hesitated. He wanted nothing more then to curl up with Lance, but he was still nervous about the whole thing. He turned onto his side, his back to Lance. Lance immediately curled up behind him, putting an arm around him.

“Is this okay?” Lance whispered, and JC sighed, biting back the reply that it was MORE than okay.  Lance buried his face in JC’s hair, kissing the back of JC’s neck.  “This is so much better than sleeping alone.”

“Yeah,” JC said softly.

“But the fact that it’s YOU in here makes it even better,” Lance said drowsily.  JC put his hand over Lance’s and their fingers intertwined.

 

JC woke up to a cold and empty bed. He shivered, missing the warmth that was Lance. Lance.  JC’s eyes opened and he looked around Lance’s room. Yes, that much was NOT a dream, but Lance wasn’t there. He just knew it was too good to be true.  He looked at the clock.  Eight-thirty.

“Uh, Lance, what are you doing here? Don’t you have an eight o’clock?” JC heard Justin ask.

“Yes.  I’m just up for a drink of juice.  Don’t YOU have an eight o’clock?”

“Uh, yeah.”  JC could imagine the way Justin was blushing.  “Me and Nick…”

“I don’t want to know.”  Lance closed the fridge.

“Do you know where JC is? His door’s open and his bed wasn’t slept in.”

“He’s in my bed.” Lance’s voice grew closer to the bedroom and JC grinned, imagining the look on Justin’s face.

“He’s WHAT?”

“Good-bye, Justin.” Lance closed the door behind him.  “Hi,” he said softly.

“Hi.”  JC peeked over the covers.  “I woke up and you were gone.”

“Thirsty.”  Lance kicked off his socks and climbed back under the covers.  “I should have shut the door. Sorry.”

“It’s okay.”  This time JC spooned behind Lance, his long legs pressing up against Lance’s legs.  “I just…I thought…”

Lance turned to look at him. “Josh, I wasn’t playing last night…or should I say this morning.  I love you.”

“You did say that, yes.” JC looked away from Lance.  “I was just afraid…”

“Don’t be.”  Lance’s lips touched JC’s nose, his chin.  “I’m not going anywhere. I want YOU, Josh.”

“Say that again, please,” JC said breathlessly.

“I want you, Josh,” Lance rumbled in his deep morning voice, and JC whimpered.  Lance smiled, running a hand through JC’s hair.  “God, I fucking want you.” His hand trailed down over JC’s slender arms, over his flat stomach and around to rest on JC’s ass.  “I don’t even know where to start.”

“Kiss me again,” JC begged, and Lance grinned.

“You don’t have to ask twice,” Lance said, kissing JC’s lips.  JC moaned as his tongue snaked out to push into Lance’s mouth. Lance moaned, pulling JC over top of him.  His hands squeezed at JC’s backside as they moved against each other.

“Shit…Lance…I’ve waited so fucking long…I never thought I’d get the chance…” JC panted, sucking on Lance’s earlobe.  Lance fisted his hands in JC’s hair, pulling him back for another round of breathless kisses.

“We…should talk…first…” Lance gasped, finally pulling away from JC’s warm mouth.

“Right.”  JC fell onto his back, panting for breath.  He was painfully hard, and he knew Lance was, too.  “Talk to me.”

“I can’t talk…I can’t remember my name right now. YOU talk,” Lance said, and JC giggled.

“Well, I…” JC paused and sat up.  He put a finger to his lips and climbed out of the warm bed, adjusting his erection.  He tiptoed to the door and opened it.  Justin and Nick fell into the room. 

“Hey, Justin, nice slippers,” Lance said, sitting up and smiling.  “And look…they match the teddy bears on his pjs.”

“We were…uh…” Justin stammered.

“Eavesdropping,” Nick finished, and Justin smacked him.  Nick wore a simple pair of sweatpants and a tshirt.

“Note to self…buy Nick cute pjs so we all can match,” JC said, smiling down at them.

“With dolphins on them,” Lance suggested.

“Yeah, good idea.”  JC nodded.

“God, quit with the pajamas!  Are you two fucking or what?”  Justin asked, exasperated.

“We were until you two made so much noise out there,” Lance answered before JC could say anything.  Justin actually blushed.

“Well, uh, yeah. Okay.  We were just wondering. We’ll go now. We’re not going to class anyway…um, bye.”  Justin scrambled to his feet and dragged Nick out of the room.  JC closed the door and grinned at Lance.

“Come back here.”  Lance held out his arms and JC quickly scurried under the covers.  Lance put his arms around him.  “So…uh…I don’t know what to say…just that I know I love you, Josh. I didn’t realize it until recently, but I do.  And I’m not dicking you around, I promise.”

“Oh, God, Lance.”  JC buried his face on Lance’s chest.  “If you could only know how long I’ve waited to hear you tell me that you felt that way.”

“I’m sorry I made you wait, baby.”  Lance rubbed JC’s back.  “I’ll make it up to you, I promise.”

They heard a thumping noise and JC groaned. “Remind me to move Justin’s bed AWAY from the wall.”

“I’ll distract you.”  Lance began to run his fingers across JC’s face, memorizing every line and feature.  “You won’t think about Justin.”

“No, I won’t.” JC was embarrassed by how hard he got, but Lance only sighed and moved against him.

“Think about me,” Lance murmured, kissing JC as his hands cupped JC’s face.

“Okay,” JC agreed, falling wholeheartedly into the kiss.

The End

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