The Only Thing That Matters
By:  Jaimie

Late at night silence is everywhere
Visions of you in my head
I think of the time that we were meant to share

Lying alone in my bed
I never listened baby
I never took the time
I’m left with memories
Of when you were mine

She was on his mind again. He wasn’t surprised. Every night since he told her good-bye, she rarely left his thoughts. Chris looked back on that night often. Remembering the way he broke her heart. A heart she had so willingly given to him. He closed his eyes, trying to block out the image of her tear-stained face. There was nothing he could do. The only thing he could do was sigh and let the memories of that fateful night replay in his mind….

~*~*~*~Flashback~*~*~*

“Chris are you home?” Trisha called out as she walked through the door to his house. They had been friend for the last five years, but their friendship had grown into something much more. They had been an official couple for two years now. Trisha couldn’t be happier. It was a difficult relationship to have because of his hectic career, but Trisha was willing to do whatever she had to do to make it work. Today she had some important news to tell him and she couldn’t wait to see the look on his handsome face when she told him. “Chris, where are you?”

“I’m downstairs in my record room.” he called out to her.

Trisha smiled when she heard his voice and began to make her way to him. When she entered the room, she was surprised to see he was just sitting on the couch staring off into space. “Chris are you okay?”

It wasn’t until then that he looked up to acknowledge her presence in the room, “Oh hey. I didn’t hear you come down.” Again he began to stare off into space.

“Chris you’re acting strange. Are you sure there’s nothing wrong? Is there something we need to talk about?” Trisha sat down on the couch beside him, willing him to look at her.

“I’m sorry.” Chris smiled over at her. “I was just lost in though.” Chris sighed, ‘You aren’t going to like what I was thinking about either.’ he said to himself.

“That’s okay.” Trisha grinned up at him. “ I have some news for you. Guess what?”

“What?”

“You know how you guys will be leaving next week for your new tour right?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, today I gave my notice. I’m coming with you this time.” Trisha beamed up at him, expecting to see his handsome smile, but her news was met with a frown.

“I really wish you hadn’t done that Trisha.” he said as he began to pace the floor in front of her.

“Why not? I thought you’d be happy that we wouldn’t be apart for so long.”

“Because……because I think we should go our separate ways.” Chris looked down at her face just in time to see it crumble into tears. “Please don’t cry Trisha. Please.”

“What did you expect Christopher?” she angrily said through her tears. “Did you expect me to be happy that you no longer want to be with me?”

“Please don’t do this. That’s not the reason…..”

“Then just what is your reason?”

“It’s so hard for us to have a relationships while I’m away. I just think you might be happier with someone who can be here for you when you need him. I can’t be that man right now.”

“Did you not just hear me when I said I quit my job to go with you so we could be together?”

“I don’t want you to give up everything for me Trisha. It’s not fair to you and I refuse to let you.”

“Don’t tell me what I need Chris. I needed you, but I obviously don’t mean as much to you as I though I did.” Trisha angrily wiped her tears away as she stood to leave. “Good luck in your life Chris. I hope you find what you are looking for.”

Chris fell back onto the couch with his face in his hands, wondering if he just made the biggest mistake of his life by letting the woman he loved walk out that door.

~*~*~*~End Flashback~*~*~*~

“Chris get your lazy ass up. We’re home.” Justin called from the front of the bus.

Chris slowly got out of his bunk and followed the rest of the guys out of the bus. He looked around the parking lot, watching his four best friends being greeted by their loving girlfriends. No one was there to greet him. All he could do was stand back and watch the other guys have the love he wanted desperately.

I don’t want to be alone anymore
I want love the way it was before
And I’ll do anything to make you see
You’re the love of my life
You’re the only thing that matters to me

Say it’s all right
Tell me that it isn’t true
It’s something that I just don’t understand
All my life I’ve been waiting for someone like you
But I let you slip through my hands, yeah

“Hey Chris!” he was finally greeted with hugs and kisses from each of the guys girlfriends.

“How have you guys been? It’s good to see you.” Chris smiled as he released Ashley, Justin’s girlfriend for the last year.

“We’re doing pretty good. We missed our fellas though.” she laughed. “What about you? How are you holding up?”

“I’m doing okay I guess. Um, how….how is she?” he asked Lance’s girlfriend Jaimie.

Jaimie smiled softly over at him, “She’s doing about as well as you would think she could be. Her heart is broken. I can tell by the look on your face that your heart isn’t in much better condition. Why don’t you go see her Chris? I really think you should.”

“She doesn’t want to see me.” he frowned.

“You never know until you try.” Leigha, Joey’s girlfriend said.

“I think it’s worth the risk Chris. You love her, she loves you. It doesn’t make since that you two can’t be together.” Samantha wrapped her arms tightly around JC’s waist and hugged him closer to her.

“I guess you’re right. I just hope she will talk to me.”

What was I thinking baby?
I must have lost my way
Now I’m just a-longing for yesterday

I don’t want to be alone anymore
I want love the way it was before
And I’ll do anything to make you see
You’re the love of my life
You’re the only thing that matters to me

I don’t want to spend my whole life dreaming
When here in my arms is where you should be

Chris sat in his car, staring up at her house for a long time trying to decide if he wanted to knock on her door. Somehow his legs began to carry him to her front door and his hand knocked on her door softly. His heart pounded in his chest as he waited for her to answer. The door slowly cracked open as she peered out to see who was there. Her beautiful grey-blue eyes looked up at him in surprise. He could tell he was the last person she expected to see at her door that night.

“Hi.” he said softly.

“Hi” she replied, still not opening the door to allow him in.

“Trisha, can I come in please. I have some things I need to say to you.”

“There’s nothing left to say Chris…” she began to argue.

“Please.” he begged of her, his warm brown eyes looking down at her pleading for her to listen to him.

Trisha sighed heavily and opened the door to let him in, “Okay but just for a few minutes.” They made their way to her living room and sat down on her sofa. There was an awkward silence before he spoke.

“I’m sorry to just come over like this, but I needed to see you.” When she didn’t respond, Chris continued. “Trisha, I’m so sorry for the way I hurt you. I know that I can’t take that hurt back, but if you would give me another chance I swear I’ll never hurt you again. I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. The last three months without you have been pure hell. I thought that by letting you go you would be happier in the long run because you deserved to have someone who can be here when you needed them. If these last three months have been for you what they have been for me, then I think we owe it to ourselves to be happy once again. The only way I know how to do that is if you decide to give me another chance.”

Trish sat there silently, no expression on her face. Chris really wasn’t sure what to think of it at first, but then he saw the tears beginning to fall down her cheeks and her chin began to tremble.

“Chris, how can I trust you with my heart again? How do I know you won’t break it again when your next tour comes around?”

“I won’t I promise you. I’ll never let you go again. This time I’m talking forever. Will you marry me Trisha Danielle Richards? Say you’ll be my wife and I’ll spend the rest of my days making sure you never know what loneliness once again.”

Trisha began to cry harder as she buried her face in her hands. Chris quickly moved to embrace her, holding her tightly against his chest. He just held her until she began to calm down. She pulled away slightly and looked up at him, unshed tears still sparkling in her eyes. “Tell me I’m not dreaming.”

“You’re not. Are we both having the same dream?” he laughed softly stroking her hair. “What do you say? Are you willing to put up with me for the rest of your life?”

“Yes I am. I’ve been ready since the day I met you.” she softly answered as he brought his lips down to claim hers. Chris sighed happily as he once again tasted the sweetness of her lips on his once again. Finally the woman he loved was back in his arms, and he would do everything in his power to keep her there forever.

I don’t want to be alone anymore
I want love the way it was before
And I’ll do anything to make you see
You’re the love of my life
You’re the only thing that matters
That matters to me
Oh baby yeah, to me

 

The End

 

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