Chapter Fifty

“Whoever heard of having an award show at four o’clock in the afternoon?” Joey grumbled and pulled his shirt over his head. “Do you know how much time we have to waste in between finishing the show and going to the after-parties?”

“Like it’s going to stop you from finding a party that starts early,” Lance scoffed. “I’m going to see how much longer the girls need to get ready, we have to leave soon.”

Lance pushed himself out of the chair he was sitting in and walked across the hall to Laurie’s room and knocked on the door. He heard Michelle and Denise laughing inside the room.

“One second!” Laurie called out. She pulled the dress she was wearing that evening over her head and glanced over at Denise and Michelle to make sure they were decent. “You two need to stop fooling around,” she scolded. “That’s probably one of the guys wondering if we’re ready to go.”

She smoothed her hair with her hand and opened the door to find Lance on the other side. He smiled when he saw her.

“You look fantastic,” Lance told her. Laurie was wearing a simple yellow sundress with spaghetti straps and the skirt flared out slightly, while the bodice showed off her curves. She had chosen to leave her hair down. “That color looks great on you… have you been out in the sun lately?”

Laurie blushed slightly. “I was when I was away… but thank you.”

Lance continued to smile warmly at her. He realized he was staring and cleared his throat. “Are you almost ready to go?”

“I am,” Laurie told him. “I don’t know about those two.” She nodded in the direction of Denise and Michelle.

“I’m ready,” Michelle laughed.

“What’s gotten into them?” Lance asked quietly.

Laurie rolled her eyes. “They were comparing Chris and Joey’s asses and arguing over whose is better.”

Lance laughed. “Everyone knows it’s all about the Fine Kirkpatrick Ass.”

“Thank you!” Michelle shouted and stuck her tongue out at Denise.

“Hey Shelle, can I talk to you for a second?” Lance asked.

“Sure thing, wanna join me in the kitchen?” She wiggled her eyebrows.

“Think Chris will mind?” He cocked an eyebrow.

“He’d probably want to watch,” Denise laughed and ducked when Michelle took a swipe at her.

Lance followed Michelle into the kitchen and began to speak in low tones so that he wouldn’t be overheard.

“JC wants to talk to Laurie tonight.”

“But Lance, we promised her that we wouldn’t leave her alone.”

“I know, but… he really misses her and I really think they need to talk.”

“Lance…”

“All you need to do is keep an eye on me tonight and disappear when I do. Pull Chris into a closet somewhere or something. Come on Michelle… you want them back together as much as I do.”

“Well yeah, but…”

“Please?”

Michelle closed her eyes and leaned back against the counter. “All right. But you know she’s going to have some major issues with us, right?”

“Probably.” Lance agreed. “But we have to do something, she won’t return his calls and it’s really hurting him.”

“Chris is going to kill me if he finds out, you do realize this, don’t you?”

“Why?”

“Because he wants to stay out of it… which means I have to stay out of it by default.”

“What Chris doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” Lance shrugged.

“Lance, you know Chris just as well as I do… you know he’s going to find out somehow.”

“Yeah,” he shuddered. “It’s scary how he does that. Just tell him it’s my fault.”

“Trust me… I fully intend to.”

“Thanks.” Lance laughed. “We should probably go. Since JC and Justin are dateless, they’re going to meet us downstairs.”

“Are we all going in one car?”

“No, I think we’re taking three… there’s too many of us.”

“Cool… I guess Dee and I should pick up our dates since your date is in the next room. We can all ride down to the lobby together.”

They started walking back out to the living area of the suite.

“Yeah,” Lance snorted. “Good luck pulling Chris away from the playstation.”

“Please tell me you’re kidding.”

Lance shook his head. “He’s in the middle of a tournament with Justin. Fifteen minutes ago they actually paused the game so they could get ready. The only other time I’ve seen those two move so fast is when they were being chased.”

“That bad, huh?” Michelle laughed. “That’s fine, if worse comes to worse, I’ll just be JC’s date and Chris and Justin can stay behind.”

Michelle didn’t realize that Laurie was in ear shot until she looked over and saw the hurt expression on her face. “Laur… I was only kidding.”

“I know.” Laurie bit her lower lip. “It’s just hard… y’know?”

Lance walked over to Laurie and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “I know. And I’d like to tell you that it’s going to get easier, but I can’t. I honestly believe that you and JC are meant to be together… but you can’t shut him out completely Laur… it’s not fair to either of you. You need to talk to him.”

Laurie’s pretty green eyes filled with tears. “And what would I say to him? That every day I pray something bad happens to Alexandria so that I can have him back? Or that sometimes I wish I’d never met him in the first place?”

Denise and Michelle exchanged a glance. “Umm, we’re going to go across the hall and tell the guys that you’ll be a minute.” Denise told them. “We’ll see you in a bit.”

Lance waited for them to leave before he wrapped his arms around Laurie and gave her a comforting hug. “Listen,” he said soothingly. “I know you love JC and I know how hard it will be for you to see him tonight. But I also know that you still love him… right?”

Laurie nodded her head even though it was buried in Lance’s shoulder. Lance pulled back from her and wiped the tears from her eyes.

“Then put a smile on your face and know that you can spend some time with him tonight if you want to… don’t automatically push him away. I’ll be here if you need me, just grab my hand if things get really hard, all right?”

Laurie nodded again and took a deep breath. “I guess we should go, huh?”

Lance took Laurie’s hand into his and squeezed it gently. “Yeah.”

**********

“Chris.” Michelle stood before him with her arms folded across her chest. “Today please.”

“Just five more minutes,” he told her.

“I think you’ve played enough today Chris. Save your game and let’s go.”

Chris made a face, but other than that, he ignored her. Denise raised her eyebrows and smiled at Michelle – right before she reached behind the TV and unplugged.

“HEY!” Chris and Justin exclaimed and glared at Denise who was twirling the plug between her fingers.

“I think you’re ready to leave now.” She grinned.

**********

Laurie took a deep breath as she rode down the elevator with Lance, Denise, Michelle and a sulking Chris and Justin. Her heart began to pound harder as each floor they descended brought her closer and closer to the lobby where JC was waiting. Just not for her. Lance realized that Laurie was beginning to panic and squeezed her hand reassuringly. She sent a weak smile in his direction and closed her eyes when she heard the elevator ding, announcing their arrival.

Laurie found that she couldn’t stop her eyes from searching for JC as she stepped off the elevator. He turned towards the group as if he felt someone watching him. His eyes met Laurie’s for a fleeting second before Laurie lowered her eyes to break the gaze. Lance’s grip on her hand got even tighter.

“He looks amazing,” she thought and was tempted to look in his direction again. She didn’t, because she could still feel his gaze on her. It didn’t feel like anything had changed between them, but she knew that everything had.

**********

(Several Hours Later)

“Come on Jace,” Joey guided JC away from the bar and toward their table. “I think you’ve had enough for now.”

“I’m not as think as you drunk I am.” JC burst into laughter and it made it harder for Joey to hold on to him. He sobered up almost immediately when he saw who was sitting at the table. “Laurie.” He whispered.

And she was alone. No Lance, no Michelle. They had come through for him. He waited long enough for Joey to help him into his seat and then waved him off as discreetly as he could. Laurie still wouldn’t look at him. He also found himself not caring that he didn’t know where Justin was.

JC wanted nothing more than to reach across the table, take Laurie’s hand into his own and tell her how sorry he was for everything. He wanted to take her far away and make love to her for the rest of her life. He would give her everything he had if he knew that it would make things right.

But he couldn’t do any of those things. He knew the minute he touched her that she would bolt. JC knew she was nervous because she was tearing the napkin in her hands into a thousand little pieces and she was looking everywhere except at him. She was looking for an escape.

“Laurie.” He said quietly and she jumped at the sound of his voice. “Can we go back to the hotel and talk please?”

“Josh, I really don’t think that’s a good idea.” She shook her head.

“Please Laurie… it’s been so long since we’ve spent any time together and I… I just need to be with you… even if it’s just for a little while.”

Laurie finally looked up and met his gaze. She was fighting an inner battle. She was torn between wanting to go with him and spend time with him like she used to and getting up from the table and running as far away as she could… except this time, she wouldn’t return. She swallowed to get rid of the lump in her throat and decided to give in to her heart.

“I shouldn’t.” She told him bluntly and his face fell. “But I’ve always had a weak spot when it comes to you.”

JC smiled as he stood up and offered her his hand. Lance and Michelle had come through for him. He knew he only had tonight to convince Laurie to change her mind… he only hoped that he had the power to do it.

(Back at the Hotel)

JC stood over the mini bar debating on what he wanted to drink. He already had Laurie’s Diet Dr. Pepper in his hand. He wanted to take this time to think about what he wanted to say to her - getting her there seemed to have been the easy part.

It almost terrified him when he thought of where their relationship stood at this point and where he wanted it to be. He found himself incredibly lonely without her around, even though there were people around him almost 24/7. But he didn’t feel the way about any of those people that he did about Laurie.

He finally decided against alcohol and chose a Coke before he walked back into the living area where Laurie looked decidedly uncomfortable. She was looking to escape again. JC placed the drinks down on the coffee and kneeled in front of her, immediately taking her hands into his.

“Don’t.”

That startled her. “What?”

“Don’t… please… you’re looking for an escape and I’m not going to give it to you. Not tonight. Not when I’ve waited so long to talk to you.”

Her eyes quickly filled with tears. “I’m not ready to handle this Josh… it’s too soon and I…”

JC cut her off by pressing his lips against hers. His hands slowly let go of hers and they moved up her thighs, her arms and her shoulders until they came to rest on each side of her face.

“Listen,” he said. “I love you and it’s killing me that we’re not together. And I know you love me or else you wouldn’t be looking for a reason to run.”

Laurie lowered her eyes. “Josh, I…”

“Shh…” He placed a single finger against her lips. “You look absolutely beautiful tonight. You’re the one I see every time I close my eyes… you’re the one I dream about when I sleep… you’re the one I need in my life.”

He picked up her hand and softly kissed the tip of each finger before taking her other hand and doing the same.

“I need you tonight Laurie. I’ll need you forever… and I need to make love to you tonight.” He kissed the back of her hand.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea Josh, we…”

JC pressed his lips to hers once again and murmured, “You think too much… you need to feel. I know it was your heart that convinced you to come back here with me tonight… so let it be your heart that convinces you now.”

JC stared at her and his eyes were full of honesty and passion. Laurie found herself saying yes and she followed him in the bedroom with her hand clasped tightly in his.

**********

Laurie looked at the bedside clock for what seemed like the tenth time that night. She glanced over at JC who was sleeping peacefully next to her and he had a slight smile on his face. Tears welled in her eyes because of the strength of the guilt she felt within her. He could lose everything if Alexandria were to find out what happened tonight. She couldn’t deny that it was something they both wanted and something that they were almost powerless to fight against, but she couldn’t help thinking that it shouldn’t have happened.

Laurie was relieved that JC was a deep sleeper, because it allowed her to slide out of the bed and get dressed without him noticing that she was gone. She opened the door to the bedroom and closed it quietly behind her. She sat at the desk and began to write JC a note on the stationary that the hotel provided. When she was finished, she folded it carefully and left it beside his keycard where she knew he would see it. Her heart was heavy as she left his hotel room and when the door closed with a quiet click, she took a deep breath and walked a short way down the hall to her own room.

Once inside, Laurie quickly packed everything she had brought with her and after making sure that she hadn’t missed anything, she went downstairs to check out.

**********

When JC woke a few hours later, the early morning sun was streaming into his room, but he immediately felt cold. Laurie wasn’t beside him. He decided that he wasn’t going to panic just yet and proceeded to search his suite for her. When he didn’t find her, he threw some clothes on and walked over to where his keycard was so he could see if she had returned to her own room. That’s when he saw the note.

He was slumped on the floor with the note still in his hand when there was a knock on his door.

“C, come on man, we’ve gotta to go to the airport. We’re leaving in ten minutes!” Justin hollered through the closed door.

JC let his head thump back against the wall. He didn’t need this today. They had a show in DC that night and it was going to be a long flight. He folded the note and pushed it into his pocket… he made a mental note to call Laurie later. Right now though, he had to pack as quickly as he could and leave. He could always shower after soundcheck in DC.

**********

“So,” Lance said as he settled into the seat next to JC on the plane. Chris and Justin were sitting together and Joey was sitting with Denise. Michelle had opted to stay in LA. “How did it go last night?”

“It was wonderful,” JC sighed. “We made love until we fell asleep and I really thought everything was going to be all right.”

“It’s not?”

JC dug into his pocket and withdrew the note. He passed it to Lance without saying a word.

“Jace… I’m sorry man.” Lance told him after reading it. “Is there anything I can do?”

JC shook his head miserably. “I just want her back in my life. I don’t want to have to worry about living without her.”

Chapter Fifty-One