Chapter
18
A few weeks went by. Lance and Josh’s friendship grew, they really bonded during all their spent times at Lance’s house. They found out more and more they had in common and could spend hours talking about all kinds of things; mostly small talk though but they still had fun.
They watched movies regularly, sometimes at home sometimes at the movie theatre but they always had fun no matter where they were. Josh was pretty much at ease whenever he was around Lance, almost acting like his old self however when Justin came near he tensed. He remembered the threat both physical and verbally and although he’d never felt comfortable around Justin it was even worse now. That night at Justin’s house had not done a lot of good in his trust for Justin. He was still surprised Justin had not reported him and hadn’t even demanded anything from him but he was still suspicious, he knew better than to let his guard down.
Although their friendship definitely changed Lance still wasn’t any closer to the question which made him seek contact to Josh in the first place. The question got pushed to the background more and more but sometimes it would pop in his head and he had to conclude he still had no answer. Josh still didn’t trust Lance enough apparently. It was no longer only about that one question there was much more to it, he’d noticed some things about Josh’s life and those things he knew he wanted to change, he wanted to help but Josh had to let him in and for real. He’d come a long way but he had to truly and completely let Lance in, trust him 100% and apparently Josh was not ready for that… yet
***
“Could you get me a Mars?” Lance asked as he tossed his wallet to Josh who caught it, nodding slowly.
Josh was shocked, Lance just gave him his wallet, just like that and in the middle of the cafeteria that was. Justin looked stunned but Lance smirked; he trusted Josh.
Trust came both ways and he hoped that if he showed Josh that he trusted him Josh would trust him too. And when Josh would trust him enough he hoped Josh would finally share his story. Although Lance genuinely liked Josh he was still curious about his story. His friendship with him was no longer only about his story but he was still keen on knowing, he still wanted to know why and he’d figured it out; trust was the key.
***
Josh was staring at the ceiling, he was hiding once again, he could hear Henry shouting at the TV as his favorite sports team was on. Josh just knew there was a can of beer beside him on the table and in that state Josh didn’t want to be anywhere near him. It was already over an hour into the game and he knew how far gone Henry must be by now so being in the same room with him was a very bad choice. He’d learned from his mistakes in the past and he knew from experience that this was the time to avoid Henry at all costs, stay out of his way and stay quiet. He needed to disappear, basically be so quiet that Henry forgot that he was even there. Josh was just thinking about some stuff, he had the time and he didn’t really feel like sleeping so he let his mind wonder.
He’d been shocked to say the least when Lance tossed him his wallet, he could only conclude from that scene that Lance trusted him. He trusted him. How good did it feel to have someone believing in him. Just one person who trusted him and was willing to stand up for him. Someone who wanted to hang out with him and actually enjoyed it.
He hadn’t had genuine friends since his mom died. They’d all silently disappeared, no one knew what to say to him and he understood that somehow. They probably didn’t know what they could say to him but Josh didn’t need anyone telling him everything would be ok. He needed someone to just be there for him, someone he could fall back on. He needed a friend. But no one wanted to be his friend then and it only got worse with the first accusation of stealing. One after another accusation came, the principal accused him openly in the hallway and then his chance to have someone like him, trust him was ruined.
By then he couldn’t really blame them because he wouldn’t trust himself either if he was in their shoes but they didn’t know he only stole when he had to. He never had those intentions, it wasn’t in his nature but with a beating you would be surprised how quickly it would become his nature. However no one knew and everyone despised him, bullied him and treated him like dirt.
Brad of course being the first when he had the feeling Josh had stolen his golden watch during gym, something he got from his grandfather or so he said. He’d persisted Josh to give it back, threatened him when asking didn’t work. He was the first one to openly humiliate Josh in front of the class and even the whole school when he got the chance; the reputation of being a thief soon belonged to Josh and everyone avoided him like the plague. But Brad still wasn’t satisfied; he wanted the watch back. Josh denied time after time but in fact Brad was right. He had stolen the watch. He remembered how Henry had reacted when he gave it to him. Henry was actually friendly to him for three whole days. When Josh found out it was a gift from Brad’s grandfather he felt bad, really bad but there was nothing he could do about it. He couldn’t ask Henry to give it back he’d already pawned it and getting hit over something that was already gone was useless so he really couldn’t do anything for Brad. He’d wished he could because it could have saved him from a lot of heartache.
Brad made sure everyone knew what Josh had done, how he’d stolen his very expensive watch and things went from bad to worse. He was officially labeled as the thief and everyone knew it and took advantage of that. It was their excuse to harass him and no one hesitated to use the excuse. Even teachers took the opportunity, especially Mr. Zaggery who never really liked Josh as it was and enjoyed to bring him down during every class. It was now normal that it happened and no one really was surprised when another accusation popped up or Josh got treated like dirt in Mr. Zaggery’s class for the umpteenth time.
But with Lance’s arrival everything became different and this time different was better. Even though Mr. Zaggery, Brad and some other persistent kids didn’t change their attitude towards Josh he now had someone to fall back on. Lance was there for him and he came to the conclusion that in fact; he trusted Lance. Lance was his friend, he was kind, genuine and friendly. He even forgot the reason how they even knew each other. But trusting Lance and accepting him as his friend, something that should improve his life would bring trouble in the future.
