Chapter 6

 

From then on Lance sat with Josh. They ate lunch together, in silence, everyday. Justin came over occasionally, the first few times only to warn Lance not to hang out with him but when Lance made it perfectly clear he wasn’t changing his mind Justin had backed off. He hadn’t said it again. Lance told him to join them and Justin even did, reluctant but he did, twice even. Lance was happy with that but Josh got more annoyed with every day that passed in silence between them.

 

What did they want?

 

Lance sat with him but he wanted something right?

 

He wouldn’t just sit with him voluntarily.

 

Josh sighed, “Ok Lance, what do you want?” Josh asked, he’d allowed Lance to sit with him all for almost two weeks, expecting him to make demands any day now but he didn’t pop the question. They sat together silently eating lunch and when lunch was over they would walk to class in silence. Lance would smile at him when he passed him in the hallways and he was always friendly but it started to tick him off. He wanted something from him, why didn’t he just say it. He’d played dumb the whole time but he’d now reached his breaking point. Lance looked at him in confusion.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Argh!” Josh groaned.

 

This was it.

 

“You know what I mean”

 

“No I don’t” Lance said honestly looking to his right, to Josh.

 

“Ok fine you wanna play it that way. You’ve been sitting here for almost two weeks, now I know you don’t actually like me so what do you want?”

 

“How do you know I don’t like you? I don’t really know you” Lance said, eyes wide in innocence as he explained himself.

 

“Exactly so why sit with me?”

 

“To get to know you” Lance smiled.

 

Ok he walked right into that.

 

“What do you want from me Lance?” Josh asked through gritted teeth.

 

“You wanna come over to my house after school?” Lance asked, ignoring Josh’s original question.

 

“To do what?” Josh challenged, sure Lance hadn’t thought about that but till his surprise Lance answered almost immediately.

 

“Watch a movie or something” Lance shrugged then smiled at Josh innocently and Josh groaned inwardly. He eyed Lance, pondering the question.

 

“Fine” he told him, finally giving in, reluctantly but he needed to keep Lance on his good side. If he made Lance angry he would only get himself in trouble so he gave in to keep him happy. Lance beamed happily, Josh just stared at him, ignoring his victorious smile.

 

***

 

“You ready?” Lance asked as he walked up to Josh, who was getting his jacket from his locker. Josh closed his locker a little so he could look around it at the boy on his right.

 

“Sure” he answered slowly, reopening his locker to get the final things.

 

“Hey Lance!” someone called and the two boys looked up, seeing Justin approach; Josh groaned and Lance stuck his hand in the air in acknowledgment as a smile appeared.

 

“Hey Justin” Lance greeted his friend. Justin smiled at Lance but ignored Josh just like Josh ignored them. Josh grabbed a few books he could need later then shut his locker, pulled on his jacket and turned towards them.

 

“Do you have the notes for science class?” Justin asked Lance.

 

“Sure” Lance responded, shrugging off his backpack, producing a few pieces of paper out of his backpack and handing them to Justin.

 

“Thanks, I really need to catch up on this. Fuck man, can it get any more complicated” Justin whined a little, Lance laughed at his friend.

 

“Yeah it ain’t easy but you’ll get the hang of it” Lance reassured, all the while Josh was still standing next to them, waiting for acknowledgment, actually waiting till Lance was ready and they could leave.

 

“I hope so, I just don’t know…”

 

“Lance, can we go now?” Josh interrupted suddenly, was this boy ever going to shut up. Justin turned his angry gaze to Josh who glared right back.

 

“Shut up Chasez” Justin told him.

 

“Fuck off Timberlake” Josh countered, stepping closer. Justin did the same but Lance quickly interfered, seeing where this was leading to.

 

He pushed them apart, quickly saying, “Yeah Josh come on let’s go”

 

Josh backed off and turned his attention to Lance.

 

“Come on” Lance urged as he pushed Josh out in front of him, ignoring Justin’s very confused expression. He would explain later, he thought as he and Josh walked out of the school building.

 

***

 

“Why did you do that?” Lance asked when they were a couple blocks away from the school building.

 

“Do what?” Josh asked, staring out in front of him.

 

“Provoke him like that?” Lance elaborated, Josh knew where he was talking about but he decided to play dumb, fine then but Lance wouldn’t back off this time. He wouldn’t let it go.

 

“I didn’t” Josh denied, shrugging in the process.

 

“Yes you did Josh” Lance told him simply.

 

“Fine whatever” Josh dismissed.

 

“Josh…” Lance started to say but Josh cut him off.

 

“Just drop it ok Lance? What the fuck does it matter!” Josh told him harshly as he stared at Lance. Lance stared back and sighed,

 

“Fine” he caved.

 

Lance decided to drop it, he hadn’t invited Josh to argue with him so he forgot about the incident, maybe he would explain later but for now he would shut up and forget about it. They walked in silence for the rest of the way, except for the occasional directions from Lance they both stared out in front of them and walked towards Lance’s home. 

 

***

 

When they stepped up to the front door Josh’s anger ceased and they were both more relaxed. The walk had somehow cleared their mind, at least Josh’s. He had provoked Justin he knew that but it was automatic defense. He didn’t know where it came from, before he knew it he said what he thought. Lance hadn’t said anything to him after he snapped at him, he didn’t mean to snap at him either he was just…. he didn’t know what was wrong with him. He was sorry nevertheless, Lance had done nothing to deserve the kind of come back he’d given him and he felt bad. His guilt was once again there and he wanted to fix it.

 

“Sorry” Josh told him all of a sudden, Lance was taken aback but knew exactly what it was about and so accepted with a smile. He stuck his key in the lock and opened the door, it swung open instantly and Lance stepped inside, throwing his coat on the coat rack in the hallway. Till his surprise Josh was lingering in the doorway. It felt weird to be here again and it felt even weirder to go in invited.

 

“You can come in, you know” Lance told him with a sweet smile and Josh ducked his head a little, shy, as he stepped inside and closed the door behind him.

 

“Thanks” Josh told him as he stepped towards Lance.

 

“Sure… you want a drink?” Lance asked when Josh hung up his coat as well, very neatly Lance noticed but for Josh it was essential at least at home and it was hard to get rid of those little things that Henry demanded off him. He set his backpack on the floor and met Lance’s eyes.

 

“Coke if that’s ok” he told him shyly.

 

“Sure, take a seat, make yourself comfortable I’ll be right back” Lance said, immediately making him feel welcome.

 

Josh nodded as he hesitantly stepped inside the large living room. It looked beautiful, he had been here before. It was that exact spot in front of the oak dresser where Lance had caught him. It was so weird to be there again but he didn’t want to think about the reason why he’d been there before. He walked around the room, marveling at the beauty of it in daylight. His eye fell on a silver statue and he extended his hand to brush his fingers over the surface. It was beautiful, it shone in the sunlight that came through the windows and it stood so proudly, it was breathtaking. He stared at it and didn’t notice Lance was back with the drinks and was now standing in the doorway, staring at Josh who was engrossed in the statue in front of him.

 

Several moments later Josh finally noticed Lance, the way he was standing in the doorway, staring at him told Josh everything he needed to know.

 

“Don’t worry I wasn’t going to steal anything” Josh told him dryly catching Lance’s stare form him to the statue in front of him.

 

“You can frisk me on the way out” Josh added when Lance didn’t say anything, he was actually too shocked to say anything but Josh took it the wrong way, he actually thought Lance wanted to be reassured he really hadn’t stolen anything.

 

“No” Lance shook his head a little, that was not what he meant with his silence but he had indeed been looking at him suspiciously and he felt stupid for that.

 

“I’m sorry” Lance apologized, when he noticed how rude he was.

 

“That’s ok. Once a thief always a thief huh?” Josh reassured him, he understood, he was used to it by now and frankly he deserved it as well.

 

“No! I’m sorry Josh” Lance said sincerely looking him in the eye.

 

Josh gave him a small smile, “Don’t worry about it. You’re not the first and you won’t be the last” Lance didn’t know whether to be happy or be sad so he just smiled his thanks and his apology at the same time.

 

“Have a seat” Lance offered, changing the subject. This hadn’t been the start he’d had in mind, he wanted to befriend him not accuse him. He was just glad Josh didn’t bolt for the door immediately.

 

“I got a few movies my dad brought me I haven’t been able to watch, we could watch one of those?” Lance suggested as they sat down on the couch. His voice held a little bit of insecurity, Josh noticed, but Lance didn’t want to screw up again and Josh smiled because of the sweetness of this boy. Maybe he really was innocent like he’d thought in the beginning. An innocent, sweet boy that really wanted to reach out to him. Maybe he needed to give him a chance, maybe… but Josh wasn’t totally sure. He’d trusted people before and they took advantage of him. Why would Lance be any difference? He didn’t know for now, he couldn’t tell so he decided to be careful for now, not hostile just careful.

 

“Sure” Josh responded to Lance’s question.

 

“Here” Lance said as he pushed half a dozen movie boxes in Josh’s hand.

 

“I’ll be right back” he told him before he jumped up, he’d forgotten something. Josh watched him go curiously before he turned back to the movies in his hands. He didn’t recognize any of them, he’d heard people talk about a few but other than that he had no clue what they were about. He was halfway reading the recap of the second movie on the back of the box when Lance walked back in.

 

“So what are your favorite movies?” Lance asked interested as he set down the bowl of popcorn, he went to get, on the table in front of them. Josh looked up from his reading, shrugging,

 

“I don’t really watch a lot of movies” he told him, he hadn’t seen a movie in over a year. Henry hardly let him watch him TV. It was always his call and Henry mostly watched sports. On the rare occasion he did watch a movie it were always those action movies; Sylvester Stallone’s Rocky’s or an Arnold Schwarzenegger movie. Josh never felt the urge to watch those fight movies because with every punch or kick he cringed, remembering how it felt to be on the receiving end of that. Josh even had the feeling Henry got some of his moves from those movies and he was always the guinea pig. One of those new moves meant another cracked rib or a very painful bruise. It was just something he didn’t want to watch, most certainly not with Henry.

 

“Oh” Lance said a little taken aback.

 

“What do you do in your spare time then?” Lance asked curiously.

 

Josh shrugged. “Not much”

 

It was the truth; apart from stealing, getting beat up and hiding from Henry he didn’t have time for anything else. Lance frowned at the vague answers; there was definitely something he wasn’t telling.

 

But what?

 

“You decided on the movie yet?” Lance asked as he pointed towards the boxes in Josh’s lap.

 

Josh looked at Lance, “No not really. You better decide” Josh told him, releasing himself from picking the movie. He had no clue, he couldn’t decide as long as it wasn’t a fight movie, and he hadn’t seen one, he didn’t really care.

 

“Oh you sure?” Lance asked, a little taken aback.

 

“Yeah, I don’t mind”

 

“Oh ok, um…” Lance said, looking through the movies and finally settling on The Mummy, he held it up for Josh’s inspection.

 

“This ok?”

 

“Sure” Josh reassured, although he’d said Lance could choose he still asked him, it brought a small smile to his face. Lance got up and popped the video in, when he made his way back towards the couch he suddenly asked,

 

“What happened between you and Justin?” It just popped in his head and he couldn’t help but ask.

 

“What do you mean?” Josh asked, his walls coming back up.

 

“I mean why is he so mad?”

 

“You mean why does he hate me?” Josh changed the question. Lance didn’t answer, he didn’t know how to.

 

“Everyone hates me” Josh told him.

 

“That’s not true”

 

Josh snorted. “Yes it is”

 

“But why?” Josh took a breath to control his anger, eyeing Lance, he decided to tell.

 

“Whenever they misplace something they just know I stole it, they don’t even bother to look for it because I stole it anyway” Josh said, he looked down at his hands as he spoke, not wanting to meet Lance’s eyes.

 

“Did you?” Lance inquired.

 

“What the fuck does that matter?” Lance said nothing. Josh caved.

 

“Some things yes” Josh started slowly, when he caught Lance’s look he immediately went on defense,

 

“But not everything… I would have been fucking rich if I stole everything they claim me to have stolen”

 

“Aren’t you?”

 

“Aren’t I what?” Josh asked, confusion clear in his eyes.

 

“Rich”

 

“Fuck no. Not like you anyway. I wish though then I could…”

 

He stopped himself abruptly. This was going the wrong way, he shouldn’t say these things especially not to Lance. He was going to say he could move out of Henry’s place and take care of himself he would be free from his theft duties. Luckily he stopped himself just in time.

 

“Then you could what?” Lance intrigued, he was getting somewhere.

 

“Nothing forget it. Could you start the movie now” Josh snapped, quickly changing the subject. Lance eyed Josh and he saw him squirming under his gaze, he avoided eye contact and was staring down at his hands.

 

“Ok” Lance gave in, seeing this was the end of his confession. He didn’t want to push it, getting him to come was already big. Although he was aware of the slight power he had over Josh, by knowing about the robbery, he’d told himself he would only use it to help Josh. Lance said nothing and just pressed play, avoiding further arguments.

 

***

 

“Good movie” Josh commented out of the blue. Lance looked at him.

 

“Yeah it was funny” Lance said.

 

“I always like it when they put comedy with action” Josh told him.

 

“Yeah me too, but those bugs…” he trailed off as he shivered.

 

“They’re gross, yeah but nice effect, especially when you see them crawl under that dudes skin!”

 

“That girl is pretty though” Lance commented, thinking about Evelyn, the librarian.

 

“Yeah she’s cool but I prefer…” Josh cut in but immediately shut up when he realized what he was going to say.

 

“What?” Lance asked a little taken aback he stopped so abruptly, again.

 

“Julia Roberts” Josh finished, naming the first woman that came to mind, of course he couldn’t tell Lance he was more attracted to the dude in the movie. It really seemed like Lance liked him but that would be pushing his luck and he wouldn’t go that far, the risk of Lance hating him was too big and getting revenge or making him pay would be all too easy then with the information Lance had about him.

 

“She’s all right but the British accent… that does it” Lance winked. Josh’s lips turned into a smile and Lance smiled with him, satisfied he’d succeeded in making him loosen up. When Josh smiled he really looked so much friendlier, he really looked like the teenage boy he was in stead of the grown up he appeared to be whenever he was wearing that frown. The frown that mistrusted everyone, thinking everyone was out to get him. Maybe he felt like that but Lance would make him see not everyone was like that, at least not him.

 

Josh looked at his watch, startled it was this late he jumped up, “I should go!”

 

“Oh ok” Lance said taken aback nevertheless following him to the hallway. Josh grabbed his jacket from the rack and picked up his backpack. He quickly headed for the door with Lance following behind. Josh spun around suddenly, thinking of something.

 

“Thanks” Josh said suddenly. For making me feel normal he wanted to add but he skipped that.

 

“Your welcome, it was fun, you know they have a sequel to this one, we should watch that too sometime” Lance told him lightly, nonchalantly. Josh nodded,

 

“Ok” he said shyly, someone actually wanted to hang out with him. He was glad he came, glad he didn’t let his stubbornness get in the way. At least Lance didn’t allow him to be stubborn he’d left him no choice but to come but Josh was happy he did. And in the end he was glad he came over. Maybe now he would no longer be alone.

 

“I’ll see you at school tomorrow” Josh said.

 

Lance nodded as he held the door open, “Bye”

 

Josh smiled and then turned, he walked when Lance was looking but as soon as he noticed Lance had closed the door he started to run, running home, hoping he would still be in time for diner.

 

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