Justin was still worrying a week later, now maybe
more than ever because Josh was not the kind of guy to just disappear. Josh
still hadn’t called him back.
Justin
was really angry at him, he felt like Josh had abandoned him but at the same
time he still worried. He was mad yes but Josh was still his brother. He
wondered what was going on with him. Josh had made some strange decisions
lately and it was not him.
He’d
asked Chris if he could ask around a bit, find out where his brother was
exactly and what he was doing but Chris didn’t get far, he’d been to his work.
The Treydson company; he’d asked around and all the employee’s had been able to
tell Chris was that Josh had quit his job suddenly. They’d also heard he’d done
it so he could spend day and night with his girlfriend; the sister of the boss.
They didn’t think he’d planned to leave but he’d seemed pretty happy at the
time.
Chris
really hadn’t wanted to tell Justin; he’d been living with him for a week and
he’d seen how Justin had gone from worry to anger. He seemed to get angrier as
the days went by without a word from his brother and the news he’d heard that
Josh was happy to leave his work to move in with Louisa wouldn’t do Justin’s
anger any good.
Eventually
Justin had demanded that Chris should tell whatever he knew and Justin had
spent the next half hour throwing things around in his room. When the sound
stopped, Chris dared to check in, to see if Justin’s room really looked like a
tornado had went through, he sure had heard it. He found Justin on the floor,
softly crying and it reminded Chris so much of the young boy he used to be. It
was something that had amazed Chris about Justin right away; you would think
that with looks like Justin’s a boy would become very arrogant and cocky but
Justin was neither. He was more insecure than you would ever think and afraid
of people not liking him. It was just in his nature and the idea that his own
brother didn’t like him anymore and wanted to ignore him, hurt more than
anything. He’d hidden his fear and pain by being angry the past week but it
finally caught up with him.
Chris
tried everything to comfort him, producing all kinds of excuses and Justin had
nodded but Chris could tell he hadn’t believed it at all. Justin was convinced
his brother ignored and put him off, keeping him at bay, because he had other
people who cared about him now; rich people and they seemed more important to
Josh than his own brother.
***
Of
course Justin had no idea what was really going on. He had no way of knowing
how utterly miserable Josh was and how desperately Josh wanted to call him.
Josh, however, didn’t dare to ask if he could call his brother. He didn’t want
to direct Dan’s negative attention to his brother. He might have had a hang
over but Josh remembered every word of the threat Dan had shot his way that
morning; “one more disobedient act from you and your brother will wish he
was never related to you.”
He
was so afraid that if he would start the conversation about calling his brother
he would loose his patience and that he would somehow make Dan angry. Dan would
certainly make him pay and he would go after Justin.
No
matter how it hurt to not be able to call him, although he wanted to so
desperately, he didn’t ask because he rather had that he was hurting himself
than that Dan was hurting his brother. He could not stand the thought.
And
he wouldn’t risk it.
***
Dan
was pleased; it had been three weeks since the drinking episode with Josh.
Although Josh didn’t look very vivid he was obedient; he did what they asked
and that was all Dan cared about. Louisa was still very happy with him and as
long as that was the case he really didn’t care about Josh’s feelings. Josh
actually should be happy Dan had decided to let the drunken episode slip after
a yelling. He could have very well sent a few men after Justin but he hadn’t.
He’d done his good deed.
Josh
was obedient these days simply because he no longer cared. Louisa demanded a
lot of things and he did them, he hardly felt anything these days and he was immune
to her caresses and touches. He felt like a zombie, empty inside and he no
longer had a purpose in life. Everyone needed a purpose in life, you’ll get
miserable without it and Josh was getting more miserable by the day.
Louisa
however was enjoying her trained puppy. He did what she wanted without
questions these days and he was almost like a life-sized doll that followed her
every command. He was there when she needed him, when she wanted him to be
there and when she wanted to be alone he left without protest. It was wonderful
and lately she’d been thinking about something that would make this whole thing
perfect. One more thing that was missing; something she’d been dreaming about
since she was a kid and the beauty was that all she had to do was yell and Dan
would take care of it. Her life was perfect.
Justin’s
life was anything but perfect. Josh was still on his mind; he felt safe with
Chris and he loved Chris; he was a good friend. But… he wasn’t Josh. He could
not get over the fact that Josh had simply abandoned him without so much as
calling. Josh had told Justin nothing and that hurt. He too walked around like
a zombie; Chris noticed and he was worried but he had no clue to make it
better. Neither had Justin, he couldn’t reach his brother and although he was
angry at him, Justin was missing his brother more every day.
Chris
did what he could to try to justify Josh’s actions but he could see it wasn’t
working and Justin was getting more worried by the day. He’d tried to comfort
Justin but it was no use. He wished he could do more for Justin but there was
not a lot he could do. He’d asked around but he hadn’t found any answers and
the answer he had found hadn’t helped Justin in the least bit. The only thing
that could help him was his brother explaining everything and Chris hoped that
Josh really did have a good explanation for this or it would kill Justin.
