Becoming ‘Daddy’

She groaned slightly as she rolled over in the bed, expecting to find the two most important men in her life there beside her. Sitting up in the bed as she found it empty, she looked around the room. “Josh?”

Climbing out of the warmth surrounding her, Abby wandered into the living room. “Braeden?” she called. She paused as she found a note on the table by the couch. Picking it up, she read it with a smile.

‘Abby,

You were still asleep, and your son decided to wake me up to feed him. I took him down to the dining room to get him some breakfast. Hopefully we’ll see you down there eventually, or else I’ll have to let Chris baby-sit! Mwuahhhh!

Me’

“Lord, no,” Abby said with a giggle, reaching for her bag to change. She quickly got dressed, pulled her hair up into a ponytail, and hurried down to the dining room.

Approaching the table of hungry men, she put her hand on the back of JC’s head, running her fingers through his hair. “Thank you,” she whispered in his ear as he sat up. She then turned her attention to her son and the mess he was making with his food. “Baby, you’re a mess!”

JC reached up for her waist and pulled her down onto his lap. “Come here, you,” he said, wrapping his arms around her. “We need to talk,” he whispered into her ear.

Abby nodded slightly and looked at him strangely. “Yeah, we do.”

“After breakfast,” he added, pushing her off his lap and heading for the food. She stared after him in shock and shook her head.

~*~

“So where’s his dad?” he asked quietly as the two watched Chris entertain Braeden.

Abby sighed and moved closer into his arms. “Gone…where he needs to be.”

“Who was he?” JC wrapped his arms around her and kissed her nose.

“My high school boyfriend,” she replied. “I was sixteen, and he was eighteen. I thought I loved him. One night, he convinced me to sleep with him, and…next thing I know, I’m pregnant, and freaking out because I have to tell Ben AND my parents. I told him, and he seemed okay with it. I told my parents, and they kicked me out of the house.”

JC furrowed his brow. “What’d you do?”

Abby reached for his hand and laced her fingers through his. “I moved in with Ben and stayed there for the rest of my sophomore year. When he went off to college, he stopped talking to me, calling me, and writing me, so I guess he made his point pretty clear. So I moved in with Laura, since I was alone again.” She sighed. “I was supposed to go to medical school, and my dad was going to pay for it all. He is a really successful doctor, and my family has a lot of money, but once they found out I was pregnant, I was on my own. I ended up moving to Florida with Laura and her family, and had Braeden down there, by myself.”

JC held her a little tighter. “No one was there with you at all?” he asked.

Abby shook her head. “No. I had him alone, and I’ve been raising him alone. I got my GED, found a job at the club, made enough money to move out and get my own place, and that’s where I’ve been ever since.”

JC kissed her neck again and hugged her gently. “You’re probably the strongest person I’ve ever met. I’m proud of you. I…I’m in awe of you, but then I have been since I met you.”

She sighed and leaned her head on his shoulder. “I don’t mind not having Ben here for me, you know? I don’t mind having to do it all by myself. I don’t trust him enough to help me raise Braeden. But the only reason I wish he was here, is because I want my son to have a father, but I just don’t know if I’ll ever be able to offer him that.”

JC smiled to himself and looked at the young child. “Maybe one day you’ll find a man who’ll be worthy enough to fill that role in his life. Someone who’ll be good for him, and for you.”

Abby turned in his arms and looked into his eyes. “I’m beginning to wonder if I haven’t found him already.”

JC’s eyes widened. “Me?”

She nodded. “Yeah. Josh, you’re everything I’ve been looking for, and…Braeden obviously likes you already.”

He shook his head. “Abby, I can’t be anybody’s father. I’m only 24, and my job can’t handle this and-“

Abby put her hand to his chest. “Josh, I’m not asking you to marry me, I’m just saying-“

JC pulled away from her gently and stood up. “No, Abs. I can’t even think about something like that. Don’t even suggest it.” With that, the man walked away and left her alone with her thoughts.

She stared after him, then went to retrieve her son from Chris.

~*~

JC stumbled down the hallway as he and the guys headed to their rooms after the show. Sliding the key through the lock, he entered his suite to find Abby packing she and Braeden’s things.

“Abs, what are you doing?” he asked, yawning as he walked over to the bed.

“I’m leaving,” she whispered, reaching for a T-shirt to fold.

JC frowned. “Why? Abby-“

Abby spun around to face him. “JC! You made it clear that you’re not what I’m looking for. You’re not willing to move into a fatherly position for my son, but that’s what I’ve been searching for in a man all this time! You may be everything that I want, but you’re not what Braeden needs. And for that reason, I’m going back home and I’m going to try to forget that I have fallen in love with you!”

JC sighed and reached for her hands. “Me too.”

She pulled away from him and shut the suitcase. “And, I know it’s not about me anymore, I mean, I’m only trying to do what’s best for Brae-“ She looked up at him. “What did you just say?” she asked.

He smiled and sat down on the bed, looking up at her. “I love you too,” he whispered. “I realize that now. Please don’t leave me over this whole Braeden thing, Abby.”

Abby stared at him for a moment before sinking down onto the bed beside him. “And what about my son? I just finished telling you that whoever I choose to be with has to be in it for him too.”

JC reached for her hand. “I’ll learn to share myself between the five of you.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Five? You lost me. Don’t you mean…two?”

He smiled and shook his head. “No, five. My family, the guys, my career, you…and your son. Whatever it takes, Abby…I’ll do it.”

She smiled slightly. “Do you really mean it?” she whispered, looking down at their hands.

JC nodded. “Yeah. I love you, and if being with you means being a substitute father for your son, I’ll do it.” He smiled as she nodded, and leaned down to kiss her gently.

Braeden ran into the room just then and smiled up at the two. “Hi, Mommy! Hi, Joss!”

JC reached down and pulled him up into his lap. “Hey, little man.”

The boy smiled up at JC, then looked to his mother. “Mommy, we leafing now?” he asked innocently.

Abby smiled at JC before shaking her head. “No, baby, I changed my mind. We’re gonna stay here.”

Braeden grinned and hopped up and down on JC’s lap. “Goodie!”

JC laughed and held onto the boy, then put his other arm around Abby. “Goodie,” he repeated with a smile.

~*~

Justin looked up as he heard the screeching child running down the hall. “Yo, Jace,” he simply muttered.

JC glanced up from the song he and Justin were writing and rolled his eyes. “I’ll be right back,” he mumbled, getting up and hurrying after the running child. Scooping the boy up into his arms, he looked at him sternly. “What’d I tell you about running around back here with all this stuff lying around?”

Braeden pouted. “Don doo it,” he whispered.

“That’s right, and what were you just doing?”

“Wunning.” He looked down at his feet in shame.

JC smiled slightly and looked the boy in the eyes. “Can you please stop running for me?”

Braeden nodded his head. “Yes, I stop now.”

JC set him down on the floor. “Thank you. Now go find Joey and bug him, okay?”

“Otay, Joss!” the child replied, then scurried away.

The man sighed and walked back to his younger friend. “Who’da thunk it?” he said, sitting down beside Justin again.

“Thunk what?” Justin asked, tapping out the beat of the song with his pencil.

“That I’d be chasing a kid around. Two months ago, I was worried about getting my laundry done on the road, and now, I’m practically this kid’s father.”

“You love it, though, don’t you?” his friend suggested, smiling to him.

JC nodded with a grin. “Yeah, I do. He’s a great kid, and he deserves to have some sort of father figure in his life.”

Justin leaned back in his chair and surveyed his friend. “You love Abby, right?”

JC nodded.

“Are you going to marry her?”

JC paused with a shrug. “I don’t know. She’s great, and I do love her, but-“

“Shaina, right?”

JC nodded. “Yeah. I just-…I don’t want that to happen again. I don’t know if I’d be able to handle it again.”

Justin sympathized with his friend. “Dude, you gotta take chances every now and then. Shaina hurt you bad, and I realize that, man. I know it still hurts, and Braeden showing up so suddenly can’t help. But if you love her, and may want to someday make that commitment to her, you have to get over the past.”

JC sat silent for a few moments before reaching for his wallet. Opening it with a sigh, he dug through it until he found the picture of the woman he had once planned to marry. He pulled it out and stared at it for a minute or two. Closing his eyes for a moment, he took a deep breath and swiftly ripped the photo in two.

“I’m letting go of the past, and the pain she caused me. She’s not worthy of my heartache,” he whispered. “Abby, however, is worthy of my heart.”

Justin smiled and patted his friend on the shoulder. "I'm proud of you, man. Let the bitch go."

JC smiled sadly. "I don't feel any different. Why do I still feel tied down by this?"

"Maybe you still need to tell Abby," Justin suggested. A sigh escaped the older man.

"Maybe."

~*~

"You boys ready to get off the bus?" James, the driver yelled back to the rear of the bus.

"You know it!" Chris yelled back.

JC looked over to where Abby was sleeping on the couch. "Anybody know where the kid is?" he asked, reaching out to shake Abby awake.

"Abby put him in Justin's bunk about an hour ago," Lance replied.

JC stood up and walked to the line of bunks in the hallway. Kneeling down to Justin's bottom bunk, he pushed the curtains aside and reached for the small body. "C'mere, buddy," he whispered as Braeden stirred.

He lifted him up into his arms and carried the sleeping boy back to the front. "I'll carry him," he assured Abby as she reached for her son.

The door opened, and Justin was the first to step off the bus. He turned around to face the others. "Isn't it past these kids' bedtime?" he asked. He looked at JC. "Dude, maybe you should let Abs carry Braeden. There's a bunch of cameras out here."

JC shook his head and shifted the boy in his arms as he woke up "Why skeeming?" he asked innocently, looking at all of the fans outside. "Hurt my ears," he whined.

JC smiled. "Put your head on my shoulder, okay? It'll all be over here in a couple of seconds. We're going to take a little walk here."

He nodded. "Otay."

Abby watched her son put his head on JC's shoulder and cover his ears as the screaming continued. "Josh, maybe I should-"

JC smiled to her. "Don't worry about it. I've got it under control." He leaned down and placed a kiss to her lips before stepped down off the bus.

The screaming intensified as the man stepped into view. Braeden cuddled closer to JC's side, hugging him with all of his strength. He began to cry as the screaming continued, and was soon wailing into JC's ear. JC looked around at the cameras and flashes going off all around him as he rubbed the child's back in a soothing manner. "Come on, buddy...hang in there. We're almost through." He then reached back and took a hold of Abby's hand.

More flashes.

He looked around at the crowd one more time before ducking into the door of the hotel as Mike held it open.

JC knew the reporters could see him as he carried the sobbing child over to the fountain. Sitting down on the edge, he sat the boy in his lap. "Shhh, buddy. You're okay now." He pointed to the window. "See, man! They're all out there, and you're in here...safe with your mommy and me. And the other guys are coming in right now."

Braeden looked up with a tear-stained face as the others made their way into the lobby. "Is he okay?" Justin asked as he and Lonnie returned from the front desk with their room keys.

JC nodded and hugged the little boy close to his chest as he began to cry again. "He's just scared from all the screaming."

Justin shrugged and handed Abby their key. Kneeling down in front of the boy, Justin smiled. "Hey, dude," he whispered, until Braeden looked at him. "I gots to tell you something, man." He reached his arms out and pulled the boy into them, standing up and carrying him over to the other side of the lobby.

"I know how you feel, Braeden," he said, wiping the boy's eyes and smiling to JC. "I remember when JC, me and the guys were younger. We were over in another country, and people just started to know who we were. They screamed so loud when they saw us, and chased us for hours. I was so scared, and none of the guys know this, but when we finally got safely to our hotel, I went in my room and cried for hours, just because I could."

"You cry?" Braeden asked, wiping his eyes with his sleeves and looking at Justin.

Justin smiled slightly and nodded his head. "Yeah, I did. It scared me, but I got used to it all eventually. They just scream, they won't hurt anyone."

"Really?" came the whimpered reply.

"Yeah, man. You'll get used to it too." He was quiet for a few minutes as he carried him back over to his mother and a thought popped into his head. "Here, think of it this way. You know how when you go to the zoo, you can look at the animals? It's kinda like that. The lion will roar and show his teeth, making a lot of noise, but he can't hurt you because he's on one side of the wall, and you're on the other. That's why we have these guys; they keep us all safe," he added, pointing to their guards.

"What a zoo?" Braeden asked, calming down a lot more

Justin looked at Abby who smiled slightly. "He's never been," she whispered.

"Ohhh," he replied. He looked at the little boy again. "Well, we'll just have to get you to a big zoo someplace while you're with us." He carried him to JC and plopped him down into his friend's lap.

JC smiled and wrapped his arms around the boy as Braeden hugged him. "You okay now?" he asked, rubbing his back.

"Yeah," he replied. "Jussin cry!" he said with a giggle as JC stood up.

"Yeah, he does that a lot. Let's go find our room, huh?" He reached for Abby's hand and they all headed to the elevator. After hunting down their suite and unlocking the door, JC, Abby, and Braeden settled in for the evening.

~*~

JC knocked on the bathroom door and slipped in. He smiled as he saw Abby soaking in the bathtub. "Hey," he whispered, sitting down on the edge of the tub and running his fingers through the water.

She opened her eyes long enough to look at him, then sighed. "Hey yourself."

He furrowed his brow and stared at her. "You okay?"

Abby nodded and raised her hand out of the water to take a hold of his own. "I'm fine…just relaxing. Where's Braeden? Is he okay now?"

JC rubbed his thumb over the back of her wet hand. "He's in there watching Rollie Pollie Ollie or something. He's fine."

She opened her eyes again and smiled to him. "Thanks for what you did out there earlier tonight. You didn't have to, but you really helped him."

He shook his head. "Justin calmed him down, I could only try...he wouldn't listen to me. You should really be thanking him, not me."

Abby stared into his eyes. "He really likes you, JC."

JC smiled. "I'm pretty fond of the kid, myself." He just stared back at her for anther few moments before placing a gentle kiss to her lips and standing up. "I'm going to go make sure he's not getting into anything."

Abby reached for his hand before he could leave. "I love you," she said with a smile.

"Me too," he replied, pushing through the door.

~*~

Abby came out of the bathroom fifteen minutes later with the hotel robe wrapped tightly around her. She stifled a giggle as she spotted her son lying on the floor with JC, sharing a story.

"Really? That's so awesome," JC replied to the child as he looked up to spot her. "Here she is now." He held his hand out to her and pulled her down onto his lab. "Abs, Brady was just telling me about the time you and Laura took him to a carnival and you-"

"Threw up all over the carousel...yes, he tells this story to anyone willing to listen." She tossed a pillow to her son with a laugh.

JC looked at her curiously. "Baby, how can you Ralph all over a carousel? That's like the tamest ride in the world!"

"I was sick before I ever got on the darn thing. The motion just added to the problem." She blew her son a raspberry and wrapped her arms around JC's neck. "Now, as for you-"

JC buried his face in her neck and closed his eyes. "You smell so good." He let his hand travel up her leg and under the robe to her inner thigh. He began to place feather-light kisses down her neck before he felt two tiny hands pushing on his back.

"Joss! Mommy! Wann see teevee!" Braeden whined, causing the couple to pull apart.

JC looked at the screen where the Disney Channel was still playing. "Dude, the TV is already on...watch it." He turned and began to kiss Abby's lips again.

"Nooo!" Braeden yelled, pulling his mother's arms. "See somethin' else!"

JC sighed and reached for the remote. "Brady, see this button here?" He pointed to the channel button and watched the boy nod his head. "Push it whenever you want to watch something else, okay?" He handed the remote to the boy with a smile. "Watch whatever you want, little man...within reason." With a satisfied smirk, JC returned his attention to Abby's neck.

"That wasn't smart," Abby giggled. "He's going to be playing with that for hours. He's just going to keep flipping channels."

JC smiled. "Will it keep him busy long enough for me to have a little fun in the meantime?" He slyly slid his hand into the front of the robe, causing Abby's eyes to widen.

"You might get away with a little fun," she replied, leaning forward to touch their lips together.

He slid his arm around her back inside the robe and pulled her closer, feeling her hands slide up underneath the back of his shirt.

"Lookie! It's Joss and Jussin!" Braeden's voice cut through again.

JC pulled away and looked at the screen to see the beginning of ET. He grabbed Braeden's shoulder and pulled him toward them, pulling the remote from his small hand. "Let's leave it here for a bit, huh, buddy?"

"...And on tonight's ET Cover Story: the secret life of *N Sync's JC Chasez? Find out what our camera's caught on tape." He saw a still shot of he and Justin walking into a hotel from a few weeks earlier. He put his arm around Abby and looked at her in confusion.

"Wonder what rumor they came up with now," he muttered, pulling Braeden into his lap.

They watched the first twenty minutes of the show with no sign of the story, other than previews that revealed little more than the opening credits had.

Just as JC had gone into the bathroom to remove the remaining stage make-up, the story began to come on the screen.

"Josh! Honey, come out here!" Abby called to him, turning the volume up.

JC hurried back into the room, wiping his face. He sat down on the bed and smirked as Abby leaned back against the bed, between his legs.

"And now, on tonight's ET Cover Story: the secret life of *N Sync's JC Chasez. Just hours ago, as the group checked into their hotel in Denver after another amazing show, our cameras finally caught a glimpse of JC's new love. But it looks like not only ET, but the singer also, got more than what he planned on."

JC sighed as he saw the tape of him, not only pulling Abby through the crowd, but also carrying the screaming Braeden. It then showed him trying to calm him down inside the lobby.

The video ended, and the camera focused again on the host. "So now two questions arise in the *N Sync world: who is this mystery lady, and who's kid is it? Sorry, fans...it looks like JC is not only taken, but had also been hiding the fact that he is a daddy."

"Good Lord," JC groaned. He looked down at Abby as she held Braeden in her arms. "Sweetie, I'm so sorry."

Abby turned and looked at him. "Honey, why do you let them do this to you guys? If they say something about you that isn't true, just meet with them, do an interview, and set it straight by telling them the truth. I don't care if you tell them that I'm a single mother that you happened to fall in love with. It's the truth, so why not tell it to them?"

He looked at her in silence for a moment or two before sighing and nodding his head slowly. "You're right. I'll see if Melinda can set that up for me." He stood up, then leaned down to lift Braeden out of Abby's lap. Pulling the now sleepy child into his arms, he hugged him close to his chest.

This vision brought tears to Abby's eyes. Not wanting him to see her cry at such a simple thing, she stood up and headed to the bathroom to get the ice bucket. "I'm going to go get us some ice. Do you want anything to drink?"

JC smiled and nodded. "I’m just going to drink water. Thanks though, babe."

As she left, JC hugged the boy one more time before crossing over to the second bed and placing him in the middle of it. Crawling onto the bed beside him, JC leaned on his elbows and smiled to him. “Buddy, you look like you’re ready to zonk. Are you tired?”

“Yeah,” Braeden replied, his eyes getting droopy.

JC smiled and reached out to run his hand over the young child’s hair. “Then go to sleep. You’ve had a rough night.” Pushing himself up, he leaned over to place a kiss on the boy’s forehead. “Night, little man.”

Braeden reached out to grab the front of JC’s shirt. “Joss?”

JC sat back down on the bed. “Yeah, Brady?”

Braeden looked up at the man. “Is you my daddy?”

JC stared down at the boy in shock. “What?”

“Is you my daddy?” the boy asked again.

JC shook his head as he saw the hope in the young boy’s eyes. “Dude, why would you think that?”

Braeden pushed himself up and sighed, thinking this was the simplest concept to understand. “You wuv my mommy, and my mommy wuvs you. You yewl at me when I bad, an’ make me go to sleep in da night.”

The man smiled slightly. I wish, little man. “No, Brady, I’m not your daddy. But I do love your mommy, and I love hanging out with you.”

“You doo?”

JC nodded. “Yeah, dude…I do.”

“Then why you not my daddy?”

JC shrugged. “I don’t know, buddy. Maybe one day, I will be.”

Braeden smiled. “Weally? Yay!”

JC shook his head. “Go to sleep, please.”

“Joss?”

He sighed. “What?”

“I wuv you,” Braeden whispered.

JC stared at the boy again. Swallowing the lump that had formed in his throat, he reached over to turn out the light. Leaning down to push Braeden back down into the bed, he kissed the boy’s forehead again and ruffled his hair. “I love you too, pal. Goodnight.”

 

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