It’s Not High School Anymore

Abby shifted the boy on her hip as she stepped off the ramp from the plane. She stood on her tiptoes to spot the man she knew was awaiting her. Smiling as she saw him, she pushed through the crowd to meet him by the wall. She gave him a grateful smile and let him pull her into a hug. "Thank you so much for coming to get me."

He smiled down to her as he put an arm around her waist, directing her toward the baggage carousel. "You know I'm always here for you, no matter what."

She nodded. "I know, Ronnie. I just...I thought I found it all...everything I've been looking for and now I'm in the same boat I was in the first time you saved my butt."

He smiled again. "And I'll save your butt next time you get your ass pregnant."

Abby shook her head. "It's not going to happen again. With my track record, I'd end up with fifty kids, fifty daddies, and no proof of that. Because none of them are going to be around, and none of them are going to offer any money."

Ronnie lifted her bags off the belt and lead her toward the door. "It's all going to work out, Diva. Don't worry."

~*~

JC sighed and stared out the window. Since Abby had left, his world had fallen apart. He knew he caused it...he knew he was at fault...but at the moment, he really didn't care. Sure, she wasn't around for him to kiss anymore...sure she wasn't there to offer her cute little smiles that always made him tingle. Sure, he loved her. But this was too much. Even if the kid was his, which he wasn't actually doubtful of, he couldn't do it...couldn't actually be a father.

He turned his head as Joey walked by him, glaring his direction. His relationship with his bandmates was strained at best since she had left a week ago. They only spoke with him when necessary and only smiled when in a show. But after the curtain came down and the lights shut off, it was the silent treatment.

What was he supposed to do? Call her and beg her to forgive him? He shook his head. JC Chasez did NOT beg. Closing his eyes, he ran a hand over his fatigued face. This was going to kill him...he had to get over it. It was gone...the relationship, the love, the security of knowing she was there. It was all gone. Braeden...

He shoook his head again. How could he let that awesome little boy leave his life...not only had he fallen in love with Abby, but he truly loved her son.

"Jace?"

JC looked up to see Justin standing in the doorway. "Phone, man."

The older man nodded and held his hand out for Justin to hand him his cell phone. "Thanks, Justin." Placing it to his ear, he cleared his throat. "Hello?"

"JC CHASEZ!! YOU TOLD ME YOU WEREN'T GOING TO HURT MY SISTER!!!" He sighed as he closed his eyes and prepared for a long conversation.

~*~

Abby nodded her head absentmindedly and wrote down the man's order. "Okay...I'll be right back with that." She turned away from the table and rolled her eyes as she walked to the bar.

Slamming her hands on the counter, she handed the order to Ronnie. "I hate this, Ronnie...I really hate it."

He smiled. "I know, Abs. You'd rather be up there on stage, right?" He motioned with his head toward the stage where a young woman flung herself around a pole.

Abby shook her head. "No. Actually, even though I was more comfortable on that stage before...I really don't want to be up there right now or ever again. I just...I dunno."

Ronnie's smile reached his eyes. "You fell in love, Abby. That's a hard place to crawl back out of." He handed her the drink. "Take this out there and then go home to that little boy. You'll still get full pay for the rest of the night."

She smiled and nodded. "Thanks Ronnie."

~*~

JC stared down at the calendar before him after hanging up the phone. Three months. Three months since she had left him. He shook his head. No...three months since he kicked her out of his life.

His conversations with Laura were draining. Emotionally and physically. Three hours of yelling, screaming and pointing fingers. And he knew it was all justified. She never failed to call him randomly just to remind him again what an ass he was.

Running a hand through his long hair, he sighed. They were playing in Miami that night. The tour would be over in a week. He was so ready. Ready to get away from the accusing glares of his friends, ready to get rid of the familiar things that Abby had always been there for. He just wanted to get away from the memories of his whole time with Abby...because it hurt too much.

Glancing up as the bus pulled to a stop, he stood up and headed to the front of the bus. He rolled his eyes as he saw the glare Joey shot him. "Don't start with me," he growled. He stepped off the bus and slid his sunglasses on, looking around.

They were parked at a gas station outside of Miami. As the driver began to fill the tank, the guys scattered in the store to fill up on snacks.

JC was pulling a bottle of Pepsi out of the cooler when he heard a familiar laugh from the front.

"So how's that little boy doing?"

Abby smiled. "He's doing wonderful. Getting so big. I can't keep up with him."

The cashier laughed. "Who can? They're bundles of energy at that age. Just wait until that one is born and you're really going to have your hands full. Especially since that pig of a man you called your boyfriend chickened out on you."

The pregnant woman shook her head. "Please don't insult him. He may not have made the best decision in this, but he is my baby's daddy, and at least I respect him...even if he doesn't respect me."

JC approached them and cleared his throat.

Abby grabbed her change off the counter and stuffed it into her pocket. "I'm sorry...I'll get out of your wa-" She trailed off as she saw him standing there.

He smiled slightly. "Hey."

Abby closed her eyes in frustration. "I don't believe this," she muttered to herself. Opening them again, she looked up at the man who stood before her. "What are you doing here?"

"Getting gas," he replied.

She shot him a look. "Not what I meant."

"We have a show tomorrow night," he added. "Pure coincidence that I'm here, I swear." He scanned over her figure and couldn't help but smile. "You look good. How are you doing?"

"Why do you care?" she replied, pulling her car keys from her pocket. "You don't care what I do anymore, so I'm not even going to humor that with an answer."

JC sighed in frustration. "Abby-"

She held up a hand. "No!" Stepping closer to him, she poked him hard on the chest. "I'm through with you. I don't care anymore." With one last smile to the woman behind the counter, she spun on her heel and left the store.

JC stared after her in defeat. Shaking his head, he ran a hand over his face and paid for his drink before heading back out to the bus.

~*~

Abby slammed her car door and stared straight ahead to the large tour bus parked by the gas pumps. The tears streamed down her face, and she buried it in her hands, wailing in the security of her car.

~*~

Abby sighed and leaned against the counter, looking out over the nearly empty club. It was closing time and she was exhausted. Then again...being seven months pregnant didn't help her fatigue at all.

Rubbing her protruding stomach, she rolled her eyes at the few drunks left in the bar.

She hadn't seen JC again since that day months ago in the gas station...and it hurt. He seemed like he wanted to talk to her, but she hadn't given him the chance, and why should she have? He didn't deserve the chance to explain anything...he didn't want to be a part of their lives.

Looking up as Ronnie approached her, she smiled. "Go home, babe," he said. "I'll finish up here."

She nodded and made her way behind the bar to grab her purse and keys. "Thanks Ronnie. Goodnight."

Abby drove home in silence, the radio made her think too much. Every song seemed to have some sort of meaning in her life since JC had pushed her away. Music had become non-existent to her. She smiled a she drove past the house at the end of her street, knowing her little boy was probably sleeping peacefully inside.

She had the elderly woman down the road baby-sit her son three nights a week as she worked, and she would pick him up in the mornings. It gave her a break from having to worry about him all of the time, and moments to relax alone.

Stepping into her house, she sighed at the peacefulness. Abby was fully prepared to just go to bed and catch up on her sleep. She was listening to the messages on her answering machine when the doorbell rang.

Humming to herself as she ran her hands over her stomach, she made her way to the door and pulled it open. Shock took over.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

He smiled. "Long time, no see, babe."

She shook her head. "I can't believe you're here."

He smiled. "It's been too long." He stepped forward and reached out to touch the side of her face.

"Ben," she started, shaking her head.

"Shhhh...Abby. It's been over three years since I've seen your beautiful face. Let's not waste time talking."

Abby pulled away from him and looked around the room. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to see you, babe," he replied with a smile...the very smile she fell in love with in high school.

"Ben..."

"Have you missed me?" he asked, reaching for her hand.

"You have no idea," she admitted, looking down at the way their hands entwined, bringing back memories of 'way back when.'

Ben's eyes scanned down her figure. "You're pregnant again. Who is it this time?"

"Another ass who left me," she replied harshly, releasing his hand. "Ben...why are you here now if you wanted nothing to do with me before?"

"I've made mistakes," he admitted, shaking his head slowly. "Can I please come in? I really think that we need to talk."

Abby sighed. "I think you're right." She held the door open further for the man to step in, and she noticed for the first time how much older the both of them were since the last time they had seen each other. This wasn’t high school anymore.

"How are you, Ben?" she finally asked, after they had sat on the couch for a few silent minutes.

He smiled over to her, his green eyes sparkling. "I've been good, Abs. I've missed you...thought about you a lot. You and our kid."

"Do you even know what I had?" she asked doubtfully, narrowing her eyes at the father of her son.

"Uh...it was a...a-"

"A boy, Ben," she replied. "A little boy that looks just like you. His name is Braeden."

His eyes widened and he smiled slightly. "Awesome."

Abby laughed sarcastically. "Yeah, it sure was awesome being in labor for thirty-six hours and then having a baby ALONE."

Ben sighed and ran a hand through his short brown hair. "I know...and I'm sorry. You have no idea how many times I have thought about you and how much I regret what I did. I just...freaked and ignored the responsibility I had in life. You and him." He stared into her eyes. "I'm sorry."

Abby closed her own eyes momentarily and then opened them again to look at him. "Can you forgive me and let me back into your life? I miss you, and would love to fill that space that I left behind."

She smiled. "Can we talk about this more in the morning? I just got off work and I'm exhausted."

"Do you want me to leave?" he asked, panic filling his eyes.

Abby shook her head and reached for his hand. "If you're planning on being back in my life, I have to let you back into my heart. And the starting point to that is trusting you again. Let's go to bed." She led him through the house to her bedroom, and watched as he smiled at the thought of being with her again...of holding her in his arms again.

Abby lay down and held the blankets open to him. "Come on."

~*~

Abby woke up the next morning with the arms of her high school sweetheart wrapped tightly around her body. She smiled at this and gently pulled out of them, pushing herself out of the bed. She padded down the hallway and stepped onto the porch to get the mail from the day before.

A sigh escaped her as she saw another plain white envelope in her hand. One had come every week since she had moved back into the house. They came every week, each mailing stamp from a different place in the country. Who else could it be from?

Money. He had written her checks, of huge amounts, trying to compensate for something he had denied her of. She never cashed them, but simply threw them on the table in a teetering stack. She didn't want his pity, she didn't want his money, and she certainly didn't want to give him the satisfaction of knowing that she needed him.

She sighed again and flipped through the rest of the mail. Bills...bills...bills... Abby ran a hand through her hair and frowned. How would she catch up...how could she without...?

Abby glanced at the stack of envelopes again, but shook her head. No, she couldn't...she wouldn't.

She jumped as she felt his arms slide around her waist, coming to rest on her stomach. His lips descended upon her neck and she closed her eyes at the mere feeling. It felt so right, but so wrong at the same time.

She turned in his arms and smiled at him. "Morning."

Ben smiled back to her. "Mornin', Abb."

They both jumped as a phone rang and Ben pulled his out of his bag. "Just a sec, babe." He stepped away from her and put a finger in his ear as he talked in a hushed voice. "Hello? Yeah...I'm here...why? No, I haven't asked yet...I know she is...yeah, I know...not yet, but I will...don't worry about it...okay...you too, bye."

He shut the phone off and turned to smile at her again. "So...where were we?"

"What haven't you asked me, and what am I?" Abby asked, narrowing her eyes at him.

"Don't worry about it."

"Ben, it's obviously the real reason you came, so you might as well be out with it now and not waste my time." Her hands rested on her hips and she stared back at him.

Ben sighed. "Okay. Look, the truth is-"

She held up her hand for a moment. "Wait. Ben...did you finish college?"

He shook his head. "No. Flunked out...I partied too much."

Abby sighed. "Great. Go on."

"The truth is, I am kind of in a slump right now, and what I really need is some money to get me by. But the thing is, being with you last night reminded me of how much I love you, and I want to be with you."

"So you're here because you think I have money?" she asked, moving to sit on the couch.

"Well...yeah," he replied. "I mean, you were dating a pop star...I know he's loaded and if he was the guy who knocked you up, then he should be sending you money, right?"

"I haven't accepted anything from him," she replied. "Ben...if all you want from me is money, then-"

"No!" he yelled, moving to kneel before her. "That's why I came, but I don't plan to leave at all," he replied, pulling her hands into his own.

Abby stared into his green eyes, not knowing what to believe.

~*~

JC groaned as he heard his cell phone ringing beside his bed. Rolling over, he grabbed it and turned it on, placing it up against his ear. "Hello?"

"Is this Josh Chasez?" an elderly woman asked, her voice high and squeaky.

"Uh yeah, can I help you, Ma'am?" he asked.

"Honey, I'm sorry to bother you so early in the morning, but I can't seem to get a hold of Miss Abby down the street and I'd hate to go down there if something is supposed to be private. But I am babysitting her son right now and I have an emergency that I need to tend to. My youngest daughter just went into labor and she needs me with her and I can't take this precious little boy with me. I was wondering if you knew a different way to get a hold of the dear down the road."

JC shook his head. "How did you get my number?"

"She gave it to me in case of an emergency," she replied.

The emotion JC felt at that news was new to him and he didn't know for sure what it was. "Um...yeah, look. Give me fifteen minutes and I'll be there. I'm in town visiting my cousin, so you're lucky," he offered with a smile.

"Great," she said. "Thanks, dear."

JC smiled. "No problem. I'll be right over."

He shut off his phone and raced to change.

~*~

"Ben! I don't feel like discussing this with you! You came for one reason and one reason only! You wanted money and I don't have any to offer you. God! I thought you wanted back into our lives and you've already screwed things up again." She ran her hands through her hair in frustration. "I guess this is what I get for trusting you again."

His face fell and he watched her pace...exactly what she had been doing for the last half hour since his true intentions had come out. "Abs, please-"

"No!" she yelled. "Ben! This isn't going to work any better this time than it did last time. I was weak last night and found comfort in familiar territory, but it was wrong and I was too. So I'd really appreciate it if you would just leave...and stay away this time."

She walked to the door and smiled slightly as he grabbed his bag and followed her. "Fine, Abs...whatever. I'm out of here."

Abby reached for the handle, but paused and looked at him again. "Since you didn't make it through college, just how did you plan to support me and Braeden if I had let you back into our lives? Did you plan on living off any money JC might have sent me?"

He shrugged. "Basically, yeah. I figure you had a job anyway, so I'd let you figure it out."

Her eyes narrowed and she pulled the door open. "Get out of my house." She turned and stopped short as she saw the man standing on the front porch, holding her son's hand. "Not you too," she moaned.

JC smiled slightly. "Hey, Abby. I didn't know you had company."

"What are YOU doing here?" she asked. "And why do you have him?"

He looked down at the boy who clung to his hand. "Mrs. Bennett from down the street couldn't get a hold of you this morning when her daughter went into labor, and called me to come get him. I am simply delivering the merchandise."

Ben's eyes clung to the small boy beside the man. "Is that him?" he asked quietly.

Abby looked at him and nodded reluctantly. "Yes, that's him."

"My son," he whispered, causing JC's eyes to widen as he realized who this man was.

Braeden's dad.

Ben knelt down and held his hand out to the little boy. "Hey Braeden. How are you today, little man?"

Braeden's eyes narrowed and he wrapped one arm around JC's leg. "Whoosatt?" he asked his mother.

"I'm your daddy," Ben replied for her, scooting closer to the little boy.

Braeden shook his head. "Noooo! Joss iss my daddy!"

Ben's eyes darted up to see the smug smile on JC's face. "Excuse me?" he asked.

"I've been there for him. He started calling me Daddy." JC shrugged. "I can't help it you didn't want to be a part of his life."

"That's my kid," Ben growled through clenched teeth.

"So now you stake your claim, huh?"

Ben stood up and wrapped an arm around Abby's waist. "Well...see, this is how it's gonna work. You raised my kid...now I'm going to raise yours...in addition to my own." He smiled. "How's that for a deal?"

JC's eyes glazed over in anger and he saw the way Abby flinched at Ben's touch. "I believe she wanted you to leave," he replied, picking Braeden up and walking into the house. He set the little boy down on the couch and shoved the older man out the door. "And so do I, so beat it. You were a lousy father in the first place; you don't deserve to be in his life."

Ben flashed a finger to the man before climbing into his car. "Whatever, dude."

JC shook his head and stepped back into the house, watching Abby hug Braeden tightly. "Are you okay?" he asked her, placing a hand on her shoulder.

Abby turned and smiled up at him. "Yeah. Thanks." She sat down on the couch and pulled her son onto her lap.

JC sat down beside her and silently reached for her hand. That was all that needed to be said.

~*~

They sat in silence for a few minutes until Braeden started complaining of being hungry. JC smiled slightly to her as she released his hand and he watched her stand up and take her son into the kitchen for some cereal.

He sighed and stared at the wall, wondering what would come of them now. He hoped they would be able to talk, and she would give him a chance to explain...to talk his way out of the rut she forced him into. He was stuck until she gave him a chance to talk his way out of it.

JC looked up as she re-entered the room. "He's eating." She sat down beside him again and tucked her hair behind her ear. Turning to look at him for a moment, she sighed and posed the question on her mind.

"Joshua, why are you here? You didn't want anything to do with me seven months ago when I told you I was pregnant. What's changed now?"

JC sighed and looked at her, his eyes glazing over with so much guilt. "Abby...I was stupid. I know...I believe that that is my child. I was just...an idiot. I love you," he whispered, reaching for her hand again. "Abs...I want to be in your life...I want to be in Braeden's life, and I want to be in our baby's life."

She stared into his eyes and saw the truth there. He loved her...he loved Braeden, and he would love their baby too.

She leaned forward and fell into his arms. They wrapped around her body and held her close to his own. It felt so right, and for once, she felt like her life was going to turn out okay.

~*~

Abby Garner watched from the doorway as the only man she ever really loved placed her son in his bed. Her heart swelled as she observed the kiss the man placed on the child's forehead.

She smiled slightly as JC stood up and faced her, walking toward her as she backed into the hallway. He placed his hands on her waist and leaned down to kiss her for the first time since he had arrived. His lips were like forgotten territory to her and she felt like she needed more and more of them to quench the thirst she had been living with.

They finally pulled apart and she smiled up at him. "I'm so glad you're here. I didn't want to do this alone. I-" She hesitated. "I don't think I could do this alone. I need you there when I go into labor." She reached for his hand and led him down the hall to the bedroom where their relationship started.

JC smiled and climbed into the bed beside the woman. Kissing the back of her neck, he whispered his proclamation of love close into her ear and nuzzled his face close into her skin. "Goodnight," he whispered.

She gave a small smile and closed her eyes. "I love you too. Night."

 

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