Chapter 4

 

                Meghan moved the chain so it would remain between the door and the doorframe.  She’d promised Chris she’d go see him first thing in the morning, if only for a few minutes, only to realise as she was leaving the room that there was only one key card, which she had very intelligently left with the boys last night.  When she returned to the room, she assumed she hadn’t taken it with her and had knocked for Leslie to let her in, but upon searching for it that morning, she discovered that she had actually simply left it with the boys. Not that she didn’t trust them, but they were all known pranksters and Meghan felt better knowing there was some way to get into the room without waking Leslie.  Therefore, she made sure it didn’t lock shut, but was kept a crack open thanks to the chain.

                She made her way down the hall to Chris’ room where she hoped he’d only need her for a few moments before she could go find the missing key.  Not that it really mattered since they were leaving in a few hours.

 

                Lance reached out to grab the girl before she could fall, but only managed to brush his hand against her own as she plunged down.  He could hear her screams echo through his head. Sitting up in bed, he tried to calm himself as the nightmare faded.  Well, most of it faded, but for some reason, the screaming could still be heard.  It took a few moments for him to completely evade the confusion sleep had cast over him and realise that someone was really screaming.  Without a second thought, he jumped out of bed and headed toward the noise.

                Not even bothering to wonder why Meghan’s door, the door to the room right next to his own, wasn’t fully closed, Lance barged in, letting it shut behind him.  He was still confused when he didn’t see Meghan there, but the sight of Leslie thrashing around her bed, was enough to get him moving once again.

                He was surprised to find that she was sleeping, never having heard anyone scream in their sleep before; talk yes, but scream, no.  He rushed to her side, sitting on the edge of her bed wondering what he should do.  From the state she was in, he doubted shaking her awake would do anything to alleviate the horror he could plainly read upon her face, therefore he reached up and soothed her hair away from her face gently, continuing the petting motion as he tried to calm her.

                “Hey, shh, it’s okay,” Lance whispered in the most gentle voice his bass tone could muster.  “Wake up Leslie.  Come on, it’s just a bad dream girl.”

                Finally, the cajoling work and she opened her eyes to him.  He smiled down at her despite the fact that she shied away from him.  She watched him for a moment, all too aware of the fact that his hand was rhythmically passing through her hair, and that while she’d recently been avoiding direct contact with everyone, it felt really nice.

                “Hey, are you okay?”

                “Yeah, bad dream,” she answered, pulling the covers up around her and trying to sit up from the tangled mess she’d worked herself into.

                “You want me to go get Meghan?” he asked.  He would have liked her to talk to him, but knew from personal experience that it takes a while to open up to others.

                “No,” she cried, grabbing his arm as he turned to get up.  She pulled him down until he was once again sitting on the bed.  “Please don’t.  I mean,” she gulped, trying to find the words that would convince him without alarming him into getting her cousin.  “She worries so much and she already babies me more than I ever thought possible.  It’s not that-”

                “I understand.”  Lance smiled at her through his interruption.  He was of the great philosophy that despite what others thought, a person always knew best what they needed, if Leslie thought she didn’t need Meghan, than she didn’t need Meghan.

                “Is there anything I can get you?” he asked gently, all too aware that her hand was still holding his arm in place.

                “No, I just . . . ”  She looked up at him and his heart almost broke when he saw the lost look in her eyes.  Tears were threatening to spill over, but either she refused to cry in front of him or she no longer had the will to shed any more tears over a situation that she felt she’d been grieving over for too long.

                “Yeah?” he asked, as he raked his fingers through her hair one more time.  And then she broke down.  She fell against him as the sobs took over her body.  Lance sat there in semblance of shock for a few moments as he processed the fact that she had simply caved against him.  Then, when the situation finally penetrated his brain, he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer to him until she was out of the awkward crouching position in which she’d fallen.  Leslie leaned against him through the movement and when he was done repositioning her, she sat against him, her head buried in his chest and her hip resting against his.  Lance didn’t know how long this would last, but he didn’t really care as he gently rocked her and murmured comforting words in her ear.

 

                JC rolled over to find a comfortable position that would allow him to quickly fall back to sleep before he completely woke up.  He tried to stretch out, taking up as much of the bed as he could, but met resistance when his arm reached over to the other side of the bed.  He squinted open his eyes to see what the resistance was coming from, when he saw his girlfriend’s back facing him, presumable deep in sleep.

                He smiled to himself, remembering that she was with him, and not only for a few days, but for the rest of the tour. Two months, one week and a half of him and his Tee on the road together.  He scooted closer to her and wrapped his arm around her waist.

                “Don’t think that makes up for hitting me right now,” she mumbled as she shuffled back against him until their bodies were flush against each other.

                “Sorry baby, I forgot you were here,” he whispered, hoping the talking would stop soon and he could once again find the peaceful sleep he always slept when she was in his arms.

                “Yeah, that’s going to make it better.  Thanks Joshua.”  He grinned against her skin, all too aware of the fact that she was simply playing with him.

                “I only speak the truth.  Now shut up and go back to sleep.”  Christalee contemplated starting in on a long speech simply to spite him, but she was as, if not more tired than he was.  She’d just gotten comfortable and was moments away from falling asleep when there was a knock on the door.

                “No.  Go away,” she whined, her head hiding in her pillow.  This was the part of touring that she hated.  The part where sleep only lasted a few hours and mornings began before any sensible human being was awake.

                JC reluctantly let go of her and made his way to the door.  Usually, he would simply lay there and let whomever was knocking either tire themselves out or go get a key to open the door from their end, but it was Christalee’s first day there and he had every intention of making her feel like she never wanted to leave.  Apparently, this included getting out of bed so she could get a few more hours of sleep.

                “What?”  JC asked, even before he could make out exactly who was on the other side of the door.

                “Good morning to you too buddy,” Justin answered as he gave JC a pat on the back and walked into the room.  He saw Christalee bundled under the covers, and didn’t hesitate to hop on the bed, wrapping his left arm over the bundle she made.  “Wake up Chrissy.”

                “Don’t call me that,” came the muffled reply.

                “Come on, it’s nice and early and it’s time to get to work,” he insisted as he shook her body.

                “I thought you guys had the day off,” she answered, still hidden under the covers.

                “We have the day off from interviews and performances, there’s other stuff to do though Chrissy.”  He emphasized the last part of her name, all too aware that it would annoy her.

                “Now?” she asked, though to be completely honest, she had yet to look at the clock, therefore it could have been after noon for all she knew.

                “Yes now.  Well, maybe not now.  You should get dressed and stuff, maybe that way JC will stop shooting those death rays in my direction.” Christalee couldn’t see him, but there was no doubt in her mind that Justin was trying to hide a mischievous smirk in her hair as he moved his head closer to her.

                “Maybe if you weren’t laying on top of my girlfriend,”  JC muttered as he neared the pair.  He reached out, grabbed Justin by the shirt collar, and pulled him away from his girlfriend, until he harshly hit the ground.  Immediately, JC scooted onto the bed and attached himself to Christalee before Justin had a chance to return.

                “That, was not fair,” was Justin’s only response. He rose from his new seat and made his way to the door.

                “In an hour Chrissy,” he yelled over his shoulder as he left the room.  JC sighed in contentment when he heard the door close and snuggled closer to Christalee.  He had barely made himself comfortable when she began to move.

                “What are you doing?” he asked, his hand lazily reaching out to grab some part of her and pull her back against him where they could get comfortable together for another few hours.

                “Work.  You heard Justin, I have like an hour to get ready, and if I stay in bed with you any longer, I’m just going to fall asleep and be late.” She shuffled around her suitcase, looking for something to wear.  She settled on jeans and a T-shirt figuring Justin would have told her if they were going somewhere that required anything nicer.

                “Screw J, just come back to bed, he can wait.”

                “No he can’t.  He’s the boss,” she told him as she grabbed her shampoo from a different bag.

                “I thought I was the boss,” JC mumbled in a pouting voice.

                “That’s because you’re delusional,” she told him, already heading toward the bathroom despite the fact that she knew he wanted to debate with her for a while longer.

                “Justin can wait, I haven’t seen you in a long time.  Come back to bed Tee.”

                “Hum, you’re right,” she soothed him, “I should just join you in bed, fall asleep, be late for work, lose my job consequently making me unemployed, have to work two or three crappy part-time jobs until I can find another full-time position that will, most probably, keep me far away from you once again.  That’s a brilliant idea JC.”

                And there was the nickname again.  He knew better than to be stubborn when she started using his nickname and he was even more aware of the fact that she was right.  While Justin was the nicest guy with his friends and coworkers, when he meant business, he meant business and there was no playing around.   He might love Christalee like a sister, but if she wasn’t doing her job, he wouldn’t keep her around just to please JC and disturb his charity.

                “Uh, fine.  How long do you think he’s going to need you?”  JC asked, shuffling onto his side so he could watch her as she moved around the room, picking up the things she’d just noticed that he had thrown around the room the night before.

                “I don’t know.  It’s my first day, so he’ll probably want to show me the ropes.  I wouldn’t be surprised if that took all day.”

                “All day?”  JC flopped onto his back as he whined.  “But I haven’t seen you in so long.”

                “And so you’ll get to see me tonight,” she told him, as she bent her body over his to give him a quick kiss on the lips. When she tried to move away, his arms kept her hovering over him.

                “Alright, but I expect a reward for spending the entire day without you when I know you’re only a few steps away.”

                “Deal,” she answered, nodding her head emphatically.  “You can even be the boss.”  She told him before planting another quick kiss on his lips and finally heading for the bathroom.

 

                “I think I’m driving her insane.”

                “I have no doubt you are,” he nodded his head and concentrated what looked like his full attention on the muffin in his hand.

                “Joey!  You’re not helping.”  He chuckled as she swatted his arm.

                “I’m kidding Meghan, I’m sure you’re not driving her insane.”

                “But I am, I can see it in her eyes, she looks at me like I’m this big nuisance and annoying and-”

                “Overbearing, controlling, always up in everyone’s business,” he looked over at her when he heard Anthony, the bodyguard eating next to him, cough to disguise the laughter that threatened to erupt from his throat.  Meghan did not look pleased with his addition to her sentence.  “It’s a joke honey, relax.”

                “I’m just . . . ” Meghan let out a big sigh as her head fell against Joey’s shoulder, “I’m worried about her.  She shies away from anyone that even slightly looks like they’re about to touch her, she jumps at every little noise, and no matter what she says, I know she’s having nightmares.  I want her to get better Joey.”

                “And she will Meg, just give her time.  I promise you she’ll come around, she probably just doesn’t understand that she’s supposed to be doing so on Meghan’s schedule.”

                Meghan slapped his arm though she couldn’t help but smile at his comment.  “Jerk. I guess you’re right, I just don’t know what I’ll do if she doesn’t get better soon.”

                Joey cleared his throat, not sure where to take the conversation from there.  “So, um, aren’t you supposed to be meeting with Chris right about now?”

                “Trying to get rid of me Fatone?”  She raised one eyebrow in an attempt to look somewhat challenging, but only managed to make Joey laugh at her, so she changed tactics.  “Yeah, but he was on the phone, so I came out here until I figure he’s done.”

                “Who was he talking to?”  Joey asked.  Once upon a time he would have felt like he was prying, but after living on a bus with five guys for an extended period of time, it took a very personal question to feel like he was crossing any uncharted privacy boundary.

                “I don’t know, didn’t quite understand what he was talking about. All I know is that he motioned he’d be with me in two minutes . . .  fifteen minutes ago.”  The words had barely left her mouth when Chris appeared, plopping himself next to her on the booth seat, despite the fact that there was much more room on the other side of the table.

                “What did I miss?” he asked, taking a bite of the bagel on Meghan’s plate.

                “That’s mine!” she protested though she hadn’t taken a bite from it in the last ten minutes and was more than full.

                “Yeah, but you’re full, I can see it in your face,” he answered as he took another bite.  Meghan gave him an odd look trying to figure out how he could possibly tell that she was full simply by looking at her face, but Joey entered the conversation before she had time to ask.

                “Nothing.  Nada.  Niente.”

                “What?  On a Nsync tour.  I find that very hard to believe.”

                “Well believe it man,” Joey took a bite of his own breakfast before explaining.  “Both JC and Justin’s girls are around, we have the day off, and Lance . . .  well Lance is just AWOL.  I don’t have an explanation for that one, but Lance isn’t that interesting anyway, so even if he were around, there would be nothing to report.”

                “I’m sure he resents that,”  Justin stated as he plopped down next to Anthony, “wherever he is.”

                “And I’m sure he’s agreeing with me,” Joey automatically answered.

                “What are you doing up so early on our day off?”  Chris asked, already giving Justin a sceptical look in anticipation of whatever answer he was about to receive.

                “Getting ready to train my newest employee.”  He smiled big enough to show off all his teeth before he took a bite of his breakfast.

                “This early?  Since when do you get up this early on one of our days off, no matter what you have to do?”  Joey scooted closer to the wall, as Meghan scooted closer to him because Chris was moving closer to her.  Joey wanted more room to himself, Meghan thought Chris was looking for more room and Chris wanted to be closer to Meghan.  Justin laughed at the picture they were making before he answered.

                “It’s Chrissy’s first day.” Meghan groaned at the name, all too aware of how much Christalee hated it.  Justin continued talking as though he hadn’t heard the noise.  “She has a lot to learn today.”

                “Enough to justify waking her up at this time of the day?”  Chris asked, averting Meghan as she tried to swat his hand for taking her bagel once again.

                “Yes, definitely.”  He was met with three looks that obviously told him no one was believing his story.  “Plus it really pisses JC off.”  He shrugged, taking another bite of his food.

 

                There was absolutely no way he could move without waking her.  Lance had contemplated every option, but they all led to the inevitable awakening of Leslie - something he was most definitely not working toward.  It wasn’t that he didn’t want to be next to her during her conscious time, but the poor girl had cried herself to sleep and Lance didn’t see how having her wake so quickly after finally finding rest would help her, especially if she’d been regularly having the kind of nightmare that he’d walked in on.

                So he couldn’t get up, actually, he could barely move.  Leslie was practically sitting in his lap by this point and she would definitely feel any shift he made.  Lance sat there for a few seconds contemplating his position.  Before he could stop himself, a wide yawn escaped his mouth.  He had after all been awakened during his sleep by the scream in the next room.  A little more sleep would be more than nice.  It couldn’t hurt if he simply closed his eyes for a little while.  Lance wasn’t even done convincing himself when he fell into a light slumber.

 

                “I understand Justin, really I do.”

                “Maybe I should show you one more time.”  He flipped the cell phone in his hand open, but Christalee laid her palm over the tool before he had time to press any of the buttons.

                “No!  I get it.  I understand how to use the stupid thing.  I know all the saved numbers.  I’ve witnessed all its key functions in action, I’m fine Justin.  I really think I can handle the company cell phone.”

                “But I don’t think I-” Christalee hated it when his voice became whiny, and his voice was now definitely becoming whiny.

                “Right, but I do, so this extensive lesson really isn’t necessary.”  She grabbed the phone from him before he could protest.  Justin looked at her in shock for a few seconds before shrugging his shoulders.  He reached in his bag for a stack of papers which he’d already explained to her three times that day.  Christalee groaned at the sight of them yet again.

                “What are you doing baby?”  Sam wrapped her arms around Justin’s shoulders, he being at the perfect height for such an action since he was sitting with his back to the door from which she’d just popped in.

                “Teaching Chrissy the ins and outs of her new job,” he answered, flipping through his papers to find one he could explain to Christalee yet again.

                “Haven’t you been at this all day now?”  Sam asked, perched over his shoulder and trying to catch a glimpse at the papers in his hands.

                “Yes, but it’s hard work,”  Justin answered.

                “No, you just like pissing JC off, and you know all too well that keeping Lee away from him all day is the easiest way to do that.”  She tore the papers out of his hand, passed them to Christalee, then made her way around the chair to sit on Justin’s lap.  “Now leave her alone before she gets mad at you and screws everything up on purpose.”

                “She wouldn’t do that,”  Justin answered smugly, then sent a concerned look in Christalee’s direction.  “You wouldn’t do that would you?”

                “Unfortunately, I am not that mean,” she answered, too amused by the couple in front of her to lie.

                “See, I told you.”  Justin grinned at the mass on his lap resisting the urge to shove her off to get her even more mad, because he knew that would automatically result in him sleeping alone for the next few nights.

                “Well maybe she wouldn’t, but if you don’t let her go, I’m going to have to go comfort JC because he’s all alone.  So I’ll probably have to take him out, which means I’ll be gone for a while, maybe all day-”

                “I get it, I keep monopolising Chrissy and JC gets to monopolise you.  You know most girlfriends wouldn’t defend their boyfriend’s best friend rather than their boyfriend.”

                “I don’t believe that for a second,” Sam answered him, nodding her head inches from his.

                “So, am I free to go?” Christalee asked, pretty sure the pair had completely forgotten her presence in the room.

                “Are you still here?” Justin asked with a chuckle.  “Yeah, go, see your man, make him happy, ruin my plans to work a little emotion from the boy.”

                “Sure Justin, yeah, that’s what you were doing . . . ”  Christalee was out of the door before Justin could reply to the comment.

                “Well that was rude,” he whispered against the skin of Sam’s neck.

                “Ah, poor baby, I guess I’ll have to comfort you now.”

                “You certainly will,” Justin answered, rising from his chair and carrying Sam with him out of the room.

 

                “So what do you think?”

                Lance looked at him with a blank stare which either meant it was horrible or he hadn’t been listening.  Joey hoped it was the second.

                “Lance?  Are you listening to me?”

                “No,” Lance answered.  Joey had to chuckle at his honesty, though he worried slightly at how spaced out Lance had been all day.

                “What’s up man?”

                “Nothing,” Lance shrugged.

                Joey groaned and let himself fall next to his friend on the couch.  He slapped Lance’s knee to get his attention which was already wavering.

                “Seriously, you’ve been out of it all morning, tell me what’s wrong before I call in Chris to nag it out of you.”

                “Where is Chris?”  Lance asked in a desperate attempt to get the focus off himself.

                “With Meghan, don’t change the subject.”  Pity Joey knew him so well.

                “Meghan, shit, I’ll have to tell her.”

                “Tell her what?”  Joey responded, though he was fairly certain Lance had simply been talking to himself.

                Lance looked at him awkwardly, gaging whether or not he wanted to tell Joey what had happened this morning.  He finally shrugged his shoulders.  “May as well test it out on you before I have to tell Meghan.  I woke up this morning to someone screaming,” he paused taking in another breath in the hope that it would convince him to go on with his story, “from the room next to mine.”

                “Meghan?”  Joey immediately asked, sitting up with worry.

                “No, sorry, Leslie.”  Joey just looked confused at this confession.  “She was totally screaming in her sleep.  I went to see what was wrong, because you know, I didn’t know she was sleeping, and she was thrashing around so much that I couldn’t just leave her like that.  So I woke her up and she was shivering and crying so I said I’d go get Meghan for her and she completely refused.  She just latched on to me and cried against me until she cried herself to sleep man.  I don’t think it’s the first time this has happened to her either.  I feel so bad for her man.”

                Joey nodded his head in agreement.  He couldn’t understand everything Leslie had been through, well at least what he’d read in the papers.  He had barely spoken to Leslie about anything, therefore hadn’t heard her side of the story, and Meghan claimed that she hadn’t heard a peep about it from Leslie either, therefore she wasn’t any help.  “So, why is it you want to see Meghan?”

                “Well to tell her. She should know what’s going on with her cousin, right?”

                “Um, actually I vote for no,” Joey reluctantly answered, fully aware that Meghan would kill him if she knew he was giving this kind of advice to Lance.

                “What are you talking about?  I should tell Meghan.”  Lance nodded at his decision. He’d been debating what to do all morning and had finally come to the conclusion that he should simply explain to Meghan what happened.  If Joey started contradicting him now, who knew how long it would take him to come up with another plan.

                “Listen, I love Meghan, I really do.  She’s like this extra little sister that I never knew I had.  But, well, she said it herself, she’s driving Leslie insane.  She’s doing her Meghan thing where she worries way too much and poor Leslie has no way of escaping it.”

                “You don’t know that she wants to escape it,” Lance argued.  “Maybe she likes having Meghan there for her.  You know, she could be a comforting presence.”

                “Then why did she ask you not to get Meghan when you offered?”  Lance could only shrug, stumped by the question.

                “So what do you suggest I do then if I’m not going to tell Meghan.”

                “Simple,” Joey answered, “obviously she’s comfortable with you, I mean she won’t even look us in the eye yet she cries herself to sleep on your shoulder, that’s got to tell you something.”

                “Yeah, that I was there when she woke up man.”

                “No, it means she trusts you. Let her Lance.  Unless you think you can’t handle it, be there for her when she needs you.  I’m not saying you have to make everything better, I’m just saying you can be there in case.”

                “You really think I can handle this?”

                “Of course.  Plus if it gets you away from that damn cell phone for a few minutes, it’ll be worth it.”

                “Yeah but,” Lance swallowed hard, trying to find the right way to explain himself, “do you really think I should considering . . .  well, you know . . . ”

                “That you have a huge crush on the girl?”

                “Yeah,” Lance answered, though the furious blush on his cheeks was enough to answer the question.

                “I think you’ll do fine man.”  Joey gave him a pat on the shoulder before excusing himself from the room.

 

                “Which should be taken care of by Friday.  I think that’s about it.”  Chris stared in stunned silence at the woman in front of him.

                “How is it that you were gone forever, and I was right here, yet you know what’s going on and I don’t?” he asked Meghan.

                “I just pay more attention,” she replied as she shuffled together the papers that had been spread out on the coffee table before her. “Is that it?  Not that I’m trying to get away from you, but I kind of want to check up on Leslie.”

                “Yeah,” Chris answered, already knowing just how jittery she was by the way her leg had refused to stay still during the entire time they had been working on his schedule.  “Oh, but there’s this.”

                Meghan accepted the scrap of paper he was holding in her direction.  She perused his writing, but didn’t recognise any of the names or numbers in his quick scrawl. “I don’t know these people.”

                “No I know,” Chris quickly replied, “but they’re for you.  Well for Leslie really.  I called one of my college buddies, um, the first two are supposed to be real good therapists for any kind of abuse, and the last three are not only renowned, but would probably do sessions over the phone, so Leslie could keep travelling with us while she’s talking to them.”

                “But, I didn’t ask . . . ”  She wasn’t sure what her reaction was to this. She was sure however that she would like to see his face so she could attempt to read it.  Unfortunately, Chris’ head was ducked down, so his eyes were hidden from her.

                “I know, you didn’t have to.  I just . . . ”  He took a deep breath, then tried again.  “I see how much you worry about Leslie, and I heard it in your voice when you’d call, so I wanted to do this for you.  If you think she needs help, and I think that’s what you’ve been refusing to admit, then these are the people to call Meghan.  I don’t want you to be sad like this.  And if those numbers help you and Leslie, well, then that’s great.”

                “Thank you,” she whispered.  “You still didn’t have to.”

                He was about to protest again, but the thought was lost when she wrapped her arms around him.  He let her melt into him with her thank you hug.  Soon though, he felt her tears through his shirt, and realised that she needed support from him, more than he had needed reassurance from her. Chris pulled her closer to him as he leaned back against the sofa, and he let her cry on his shoulder for as long as she needed.

 

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