Chapter 9

"Sorry." He muttered as he wiped away his tears away with the back of his hand.

"It won't happen again."

"Well, actually, to tell you the truth," Mr. Lord-Alge paused as he bent down to adjust the bass level on the equalizer. "I like the emotion in there, but don't overdo it. Okay?"

"Taylor, sweetie, are you okay?" His mother asked again from the sound booth.

"Yeah mom. It's just, well, you know, it's.. it's just.." He broke off again, crying.

"It just takes some getting used to. I miss her so much." He stopped as he could feel the hot, angry tears welling up inside him again.

"We all do, Tay." Isaac said as he put a comforting arm around Taylor. "We all do." He repeated sadly.

Taylor looked up at his older brother. He was crying too. "Ike.." Taylor whispered.

Isaac didn't let him say anything else. He wrapped his arms around his younger brother and held him tight, which was something that neither of them did all that often, but something that they both needed right then. Taylor let his tears go and grieved the death of their grandmother once again.

It'd been hard for the whole family when she'd passed away three years ago, but it especially affected Taylor. He honestly didn't know why. Maybe he was her favorite, but, no it was Zac that had always been her favorite. Maybe it was because he hadn't shown her he loved her. And he did love her. He missed her too. I just wish she could be here now, and see us. He thought as another surge of tears began to rim his eyes. She always loved to hear us perform. God, why did you have to take her from me? From my family? Why? I loved her. I loved her dearly. He thought sadly.

He broke down, sobbing, as Isaac held him comfortingly in his arms. I can't stand this! All of this! I want her back! His thoughts were the only thing in focus now. He had his eyes open but all he could see was red. Red rage. Anger and resentment. I wish I were someone else! I don't want this life anymore! I don't want it! I hate you! I hate you God, for stealing her from me! I'll show you!

"Isaac, is he okay?" His mother asked, her voice tight with concern. She too was on the verge of tears, seeing her son hurting like this. I never knew he was so intense! Wait, of course I did! What am I thinking? Geez, Diana.

Taylor's anger had subsided slightly. He was still breathing hard and he needed a Kleenex, but other than that, he was ready to record the song and get the hell out of the studio and get home. As soon as I get home, I'm gonna sleep for about five hours. This emotional stuff is always so tiring. He took a Kleenex out of the box that he'd brought with him this morning, for he feared that this'd happen. He wiped his eyes and blew his nose. He looked into the booth. His mom, dad, and all the producers had looks of deep concern traced into their features.

"You ready, Tay?"

He nodded his head. "Yeah, I think so." He said wearily.

"Yes or no Taylor?" Mr. Greenburg said with a sigh.

"Yes." Taylor said defiantly.

"Okay," Mr. Greenburg said, still a little unsure. "here goes. The tape's rolling, Tay, take it!"

"Oh, yeah, sorry." Be began to play the intro. Okay, Taylor. Ya made it this far. Don't screw up. Just relax. Relax, relax... He began to sing. "If I'm gone when you wake up/please don't cry. And if I'm gone when you wake up/it's not goodbye. Don't look back at this time as a time of heartbreak and distress. Remember me/remember me/cause I'll be with you in your dreams." Don't cry Taylor! Don't cry! He warned himself silently as he could feel the tears pooling up again. He pushed them back. He knew that he probably should just let it all out, again, but he really wanted to get this over with.

"And if I'm gone when you wake up/please don't cry. And if I'm gone when you wake up/it's not goodbye. Don't look back at this time as a time of heartbreak and distress. Remember me/remember me/cause I'll be with you in your dreams." No, not now! Don't cry! He felt his eyes fill and his throat lock up. He quickly took a deep breath and continued. "Don't cry, I'm with you/Don't cry/I'm by your side/Don't cry/I'm with you/Don't cry/I'm by your side." Whew! Made it! His whole inner self took a deep sigh of relief as he realized what he'd just done. He'd made it past the most emotionally difficult part for him to sing. He smiled, an ear-to-ear smile that almost lit up the room.

"And though my flesh is gone/I'll still be with you/at all times. And though my body's gone...... ****************************************************************************** True to his word, as soon as he got home, Taylor laid down and slept until dinnertime.

"Taylor!"

The sun swept by him again, leaving him in darkness. He faced the starlight. "What do you want from me?" He yelled in the direction of the star that had been doing most of the talking.

He was trapped somewhere in the lost corners of the universe, where the sunlight wouldn't stretch far enough to touch his skin. he shivered as he awaited the star's answer.

"Your soul, Taylor." The cold light of the star answered. "Your soul." It eerily repeated.

Now he was cold already, with being out in the universe farther than Pluto. But now he shivered from another kind of coldness. The coldness of the star and it's words made him shiver on the inside.

"What do you want with my soul?" He managed to shout through the body- convulsing shivers that seemed to contort his body totally out of shape.

"Taylor!" The star shouted. And now more angrily, "Taylor!"

"What do you want with my soul?"

"Taylor!" Something angrily yanked his arm.

He turned about in the pale blue of the star bath. "Who's there? Another star?"

"Taylor?" The voice said, frightened.

"You're not the star..." He muttered as his mother once again attempted to rouse him out of sleep. He rolled over and slowly, slowly opened his eyes to meet a very ticked off and slightly alarmed Diana Hanson.

"Mom?" He whispered. His voice cracked from sleeping so long in the middle of the day. He slowly sat up in his bed and swallowed to relieve some of the dryness in his throat. "I had the strangest dream..." He trailed off, still trying to gather his thoughts.

"I heard. Stars and souls, huh? I think Ike's love for Sci-fi has rubbed off on you." She joked.

Taylor thought about this. "No, mom, I don't think that's what it was. I mean, I've never liked Sci-fi." He looked his mother in the eyes. "You know that. I'm a comedy guy. This.. what ever it was, was a message of some sort." He stopped talking, realizing what he was saying. Was it a message? A message for what? He thought to himself.

"Okay Taylor, that's enough dream-analysis. Get up."

Taylor rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. "Where are we going?"

"Out to dinner." She paused. For what, Taylor didn't know. She continued, "You need to change your clothes, Taylor."

"Why? I like what I have on!" He protested.

"Oh, honestly Taylor. You sound like Mackenzie when you do that."

"So?" He challenged

"So, he's three. You're fourteen."

"and two months." He added.

"Exactly!" Diana declared.

"Exactly what?"

Diana sighed. "Get up, and change your clothes, Taylor. I'm leaving in 10 minutes." She walked out of the room, leaving him sitting in bed. He fell back letting his head hit the pillow. Maybe just a few more minutes. Just five. Then I'll get up. He thought as he started to fall back asleep.

But Diana knew better than to leave a just woken child, because no matter how old, they'll go back to sleep. She sneaked back in the room, tip-toeing, just as Taylor had rolled back over to go back to sleep. They never learn. Diana thought. She tip-toed right up to Taylor's bedside. He stirred slightly, as if sensing her presence. She bent down right over him. "TAYLOR!" She yelled at the top of her lungs. He jumped about a foot in the air.

"MOM! What the f-" He stopped himself before he used that word in front of his mother. "Mom! you scared the crap out of me!" His heart was beating a million miles an hour, and his breathing had quickened considerably.

"Sorry, Tay. It woke you up, didn't it?"

"Mom!"

She couldn't help but laugh. "Get dressed!" She commanded, trying to be stern with him, but she couldn't. He looked too sweet.

He didn't move. He just sat there, staring at her. "What?" She asked suspiciously.

"Nothing mom. You just look different, that's all. Like you're glowing or something." She looked at him warily. "Not literally, of course. I mean, you look, you look..." He groped for the proper word. "....contented, I guess." He finally finished.

She looked at him and crinkled up her nose in pleasure. "You think so?" She grinned.

"Yeah, I do. What's going on?" He prodded. He knew that she had a secret. She'd had it for a couple of months now, he could tell. Just the way she walked around always humming or singing, always cheerful, he knew something good was going to happen.

"You'll find out, Taylor." She said mysteriously. She walked out the door and returned a second later. "Taylor,"

"Yeah mom?"

"Get dressed!" She left the room and closed the door behind her. He shook his head with laughter as he picked up his wide leg Levis' out the second drawer. He pulled off the pair he had on and put on the clean pair. He buttoned them and walked back over to the dresser for a shirt. He stopped in mid-stride. What in the world? He'd felt something in his pocket. He reached in and pulled out the necklace. Oh my god! I totally forgot! He thought to himself. Then out loud, "It must've gone through the wash. Hmmph. It's still readable." He mummered.

He was looking at the inscription on the front of the pendant. What did that mean? Wearers shall interchange presences under the star, no. What was it? Oh! "Wearers shall interchange souls under the presence of a star." He said out loud. "Wait a minute! The dream!" He recalled the already hazy recollection of the dream. "The star.. he said.. my soul. Could the dream have meant..." He held up the necklace as if sizing it up, measuring it's capability. "Nah. No way."

"Taylor!" His mom called from the living room.

"Coming, Mom!" He yelled back.