15)You sit in class making a top fifteen list. 14)Your room is a collage of her life and face. 13)Your favorite two words? "That bugs," or "Bug central." 12)The day of her wedding you're so nervous you can't eat. 11)Your best friend makes you signs that read: Cox for president!! 10)Somehow she always is brought into World History. (Courteney was taller than Napolean) 9)After reading an article about her hair gel, you go to four stores to buy it.(check Eckerds) 8)You give up your lead in the school play to be the one-liner reporter just so you can be mean. You provoke others to hit you. 7)You turn in a video to FANatic, but when you lose, you cry hysterically and create derogatory cheers about the girl who won, and repetitivly ask, "where's her 3 albums, her FRIENDS apparel?" 6)The day after you find out Courteney likes Hidden Valley Ranch dressin, you go out and buy bottles of it. 5)You dress up as a fairy, sit on a giant pink chair, and hold up signs as people drive by in front of you on the busy highway. 4)You throw a Halloween party, dress up like Courteney Cox and watch Scream 2. You quote the movie from beginning to end so frighteningly perfect that your boyfriend won't sit with you. Right before her scenes you scream at anyone who is talking or making any type of noise. 3)On May 30 you begin to frantically look for a birthday present. 15 days later it's on her doorstep. 2)Your theory of communism is solely based on the fact that you can invite her to be in your elite political group. 1)You hike through Charlotte, North Carolina at mid-day, brave an 8-lane Interstate, get caught on the median for 15 minutes, cross and then brave 2 strange men in black, on June 2nd, the middle of summer, in 98 degree weather with a 105 heat index when the ozone is at it's most dangerous level in twenty-eight years. Just to buy a magazine.Back to Caretaker's Lair