Chapter 36
"A memory book." I whispered, two days later, as Taylor silently flipped
through the pages of the book I just gave him. My face burned and I suddenly felt self-
conscious and embarrassed. "If..if you don't like it-"
"Amanda." Tay scolded, his eyes grazing my face, his expression hurt. "How
could I not like it?" he whispered. I smiled softly, and shrugged my shoulders. He looked
into my eyes, and then he turned his gaze back to the book. "Remember this?" he asked,
pointing toward a picture of Zac with cheese cake on his face. I smiled.
"Last year's Christmas party!" I said, with a never-ending smile on my face.
Taylor laughed.
"Yep. That was so much fun..I can't believe you kept these pictures." he
said in awe. I looked at him from behind a few strains of my hair.
"Why wouldn't I?" I asked him. He smiled, and without moving his gaze
from mine, he reached in his back pocket.
"Here." he whispered. I took the small box and ran my fingertips along the
smooth gray velvet of the box. Without any words, I opened the box.
I gasped. A beautiful silver necklace, with three silver heart shaped charms lay
inside. Taylor took the box, pulled the necklace out and held toward me.
"Taylor.." I whispered. I was speechless, my emotions were soaring and I
was afraid that if I spoke I'd end up crying. He smiled and turned the necklace over. On
the back the three charms continued onto each other making a sentence.
"Read it." he whispered in reply. I nodded, choking back a few tears.
Through thick and thin we've been, Through the rough we stayed tough, So now and forever no
matter what the weather we'll be just one- Together always, Forever. It read. Taylor's name
was engraved in a copy of his hand writing at the right hand heart. The first of the two
February stoned. I smiled and looked at him.
"Taylor.." I whispered again. This time, I knew I would cry. He laughed
when he saw my tears that were so badly hidden.
"Here, let me help you." Taylor said, getting up and pulling the necklace
around my neck. I touched the heart charm, with his birthstone in it, that lay in the
middle, as he latched the necklace. The necklace had one February birthstone to show my
birthday, the second stone in the second heart had his birthstone in it, and the last heart
had a February stone to represent the month we got together. Those two months were two
months I, nor he will forget!
"It's beautiful." I finally managed to say. My heart was racing, and looking
at his eyes made me want to hold him. So close, so tight. Forever. Just like the necklace
said. No matter what.
I smiled at him. "Tay..-" I started, and was stopped in middle speech when I felt
him press his lips to mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck, and pulled his body closer to
mine. Everything that was around us just seemed to fade away. His lips were warm, and
hungry. I twirled a piece of his blonde around my finger, as we kissed, and I felt his hands
make their way to my neck, fidgeting with the necklace. "Taylor.." I interrupted, pulling my
lips from his. We sat, our bodies trembling at the same pace, just inches apart. Our minds
stopping us from what could..and almost happened 3 times already.
"Hmmm." he said. He was breathing deep, and his lips rested easily on my
chin, now.
"I love you so much..it hurts." I admitted. I've been thinking it through for
months at a time, and just tonight did I realize, I'm 15, and so much in love, it hurts. "Is it
suppose to hurt so much?" I asked him. I moved my lips down, so that his just bearly
lingered on mine. His breath was hot on my nose, and that sent shivers up and down my
shine. Taylor smiled, and looked into my eyes.
"I can't fight this anymore." he said. My heart skipped a beat, as I chewed
on my bottom lips. "I've wondered for years now why I love you so much it hurts. And you
know what I've come up with?" he asked. I shook my head.
"What?" I asked.
"There is no reason. There is no reason to be in love, it's just what god
wanted, it's natural.
"We're natural." I said, finished his words before he could get the chance.
"It's natural that we're natural." I added. He looked at me, and we kissed a second time.
"MmmHmm." he whispered, as our kisses went from short and gentle to long
and passionate. I'm never giving this up, never. I thought to myself.
Mrs. Hanson looked around the boy's bedroom. "Isaac, where is Zac?" she asked,
looking down at her watch. Isaac looked up from a pile of papers he was going over and
starred at his mother.
"It's 9:30, isn't he back yet?" he asked. Mrs. Hanson shook her head.
"Nope. He left at 2:30 this afternoon, and he hasn't come home yet. I want
you to go out and look for him." she said, turning around to leave.
"That's not fair. Mom, I'm busy. He's 13 years old I'm pretty sure he can
find his way home without me to guide him by the ear." Ike said. Mrs. Hanson turned to
face her son.
"You'll go out and look for him..now!" she said, turning back around and
walking down the hall. Isaac groaned, covered the papers, closed his bedroom window,
grabbed his jacket and went outside.
"I swear, when I get out of this house, I'm never giving any of them my
phone number!" he said, as he started the car and pulled out of the driveway. If I don't give
them my number, then they can never call me at 9:30 at night when the kids aren't home! he
thought to himself. "ZAC! GET OVER HERE!" he yelled out the open window to his brother
and Alyson. Alyson got home that morning, and called on Zac. Zac, being so 'in love', he ran
to her ad, and no one's seen him since.
Zac and Alyson pulled their hands apart, and looked up at Isaac. They were sitting
under an orchid by the church down the street.
"Why?" Zac asked, as Isaac stopped the car directly in front of the two.
"Because mom said so. Now let's go." Isaac said, pushing open the passenger
seat. "We'll give Aly a ride home if she wants." he said, feeling suddenly, quilty. This was
Zac's first time with Alyson since she left, and he had been depressed when she left, and
finally he'll be happy. He might even get off my back! Ike thought to himself with a smile.
Alyson smiled at Isaac then at Zac. "I'd love a ride. C'mon Zac." she said, pulling
him onto his feet. Zachary smiled.
"Alright. Let's go." he said,closing the door behind them after they settled
in the car. "Oh, and Ike, could you drive slow?" he asked. Isaac shot him a warning look.
"Sorry, strict orders to bring you right home. I'm already breaking my back
to drop Alyson off. So be happy I'm in a nice mood." he said. Zac mimicked Isaac, as they
drove toward Alyson's house.
Isaac closed the front door behind them, and didn't waste any time getting up to
his bedroom.
"MOM!" Zac screamed from the kitchen. Where he's been for the past few
days. Which was a change, so Mr. and Mrs. Hanson never fought against it.
"Yes?" Mrs. Hanson replied, walking into the kitchen with sleeping Zoe in
her arms. "Please be quiet Zac, Zoe just fell asleep." she said. Zac shrugged.
"Sorry." he said, lowering his voice a few. "Why did Isaac have come to get
me? I was going to be home before 11:00." he said. Mrs. Hanson raised an eyebrow.
"That's not like you Zac. Especially since you know you have school
tomorrow." she said, leaning against the counter. Zac looked at her, and bit into a banana.
"Then why is Tay out this late?" he asked. He knew he could Taylor against
his mother, then Tay would get a longer drawn out lecture then Zac would. It always
worked.
"Sorry Zac. But your brother is 16, and he had his lesson today. He's
planning on spending the day with Amanda tomorrow." Mrs. Hanson replied, a hint of
laughter in her voice.
"That's not fair. I was going to have my lesson today, but Aly came home!"
Zachary pouted., a piece of banana sticking out of his mouth.
"Don't talk with your mouth full dear!" his mother said.
"Mom! C'mon. That's not fair!" he whined, his voice higher. Zoe tossed in
her mother's arms, and she opened her eyes, continuing with a deafening shriek.
"That's enough Zachary Walker. Go up to your room, and stay there until
your lesson tomorrow!" Mrs. Hanson said, while rocking Zoe. Zac whined, and with slumped
shoulders he went upstairs to his room.
I touched a piece of teriyaki steak with my fingertips. The piece was from the
Chinese Taylor and I ordered. "I don't know if I can keep it down." I said, thinking aloud.
Taylor looked up from his egg roll, making me cringe. Yuck! I hate egg rolls. I've never seen
someone eat everything that was placed infront of him, without a word of complaint. I thought
to myself.
"Try it small pieces at a time." he cooed, turning his attention toward my
hands and the food I was holding in them.
"I'm not sure..-" I trailed. Taylor took the teriyaki steak and pulled a small
piece off.
"Try this." he said. I rolled my eyes.
"You won't give up on this will you?" I asked, laughing. He shook his head.
Taylor handed me the piece, and I brought it to my lips. Tay crossed his fingers.
"C'mon..you know you can eat it." he said. His words of encouragement
weren't very helpful..they just made me not want to eat...at all. Slowly, I placed the meat
on my tongue, and chewed it. The juice was good, but then I felt my stomach rising.
"Ohh." I groaned, jumping from my seat and heading toward the bathroom.
I leaned over the toilet, and emptied the acidic contents of my empty stomach into the
toilet bowl. I looked down, feeling a sudden urge to see what I unwilling put into the bowl.
I viewed a small chunk of meat, and my little bit of warm sprite. My diet, or so the doctor
say I can keep down!
I groaned as washed my face, then after a few minutes I rejoined Taylor in the
kitchen. "I hate this!" I said. "I'm starving to death, and there is nothing I can eat! Ugh!" I
groaned. This really sucks. I thought to myself. Taylor pushed his hair behind his ears and
gaze connected with mine intensily.
"Why couldn't you keep that down?" he asked, knowing I didn't have the
answer. I shrugged and stared at him.
"This stupid pill isn't helping much either!" I said as I went to the counter
and picked up a bottle. I shook it, looked at it, then whipped it across the room. Swiftly
the bottle slammed against the wall close to Taylor. It fell to the floor and all the pale
purple pills spilled out. "These things taste horrible and they don't do a fuckin' thing!" I
shrieked, reaching for another bottle. Taylor whinced and cringed as I whipped that bottle
against the same wall. It hit Patricia's spoon collection, and the pressure made the bottle
and the spoon collection fall to the floor with a crash.
"Amanda..stop. Calm down!" Taylor whispered, stepping toward me. I looked
at him, and my left nerve in my eye twitched, and a shocking pain went through my spine.
He stepped toward me and extended his arms, closing them around me. I tried to push him
off, but his embrace was too strong. And being sick killed my strength.
"Taylor. Why did it have to be me? Why couldn't it be Duncan or Kristi or
Autumn? Why me!?" I said, as I gave in a fell against his chest. My body shook, and with all
my will I tried to stop. But it wouldn't. My fingertips turned purple, and my temples
throbbed. The nerves in my eyes were twitching and my eyes hurt.
"I don't know. Amanda it's not my fault...-" he trailed off, knowing that
wasn't the best thing to say.
"Don't you think I know that? I'm not stupid. I would give my life for you if
you had it..or even for Zac or Ike. Maybe even the rest of your family Taylor. I can't stop
this fuckin' thing okay?" I shrieked. Taylor held his grip on me tighter.
"I'm sory. I didn't mean to say that..it came out wrong." he apologized. I
felt dizzy, and the last thing I saw was Taylor's scared, shocked and hurtful expression in
his eyes.
