Funny (?) Stuff

Funnies

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  Who was the shortest man mentioned in the Bible?
  Peter, he fell asleep on his watch.

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  In desperation, the mother of a four-year-old girl said, If you keep sucking your thumb, you'll eventually blow up like a balloon!

  The next day the mother and her daughter attended a small social gathering. Among those present was a woman who was obviously pregnant. The little girl spotted her and couln't contain herself. She walked up to the expectant mother and said, I know what you've been doing! - William P Sloan

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  Here's some information I'll bet you didn't know about Ghandi

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  Mahatma Ghandi walked barefoot everywhere, to the point that his feet became quite thick and hard. He also was quite a spiritual person. Even when he was not on a hunger strike, he did not eat much and became quite thin and frail. Furthermore, due to his diet, he wound up with very bad breath.

  Therefore he came to be known as a.......

  WAIT FOR IT........

  Ready???????

  SUPER CALLOUSED FRAGILE MYSTIC PLAGUED WITH HALITOSIS.

  (Sorry. Couldn't resist!)----Received from an email pal.

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  We used to play spin the bottle when I was a kid, says comedy writer Gene Perret. A girl would spin the bottle, and if the bottle pointed to you when it stopped, the girl could either kiss you or give you a dime. By the time I was 14, I owned my own home.

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  A man sent in ten different entries to a newspaper's pun contest, hoping one would win. As it turned out, no pun in ten did.

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  Did you hear about the terrorists who took a courthouse full of lawyers hostage? They threatened to release one every hour unless their demands were met.

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