the reason I write so much about what I feel is to get it out. I don't care what people think. It makes me feel better. It makes me feel good. It helps me to understand and to get everything out. Instead of screaming, instead of drinking or fighting or doign crazy things, instead of doing nothing at all, I tell I speak I write. It helps me to love and understand myself, to be the most emotionally that I can be. If I could be a rock, a stone, or a ball of total energy and feeling, touch, spirit, love, hate, anger, awe... I would be that ball. I am that ball. I feel more like that ball than anyone or anything I know. I am energy and emotion.

11-26-01
the setting: sitting in front of byrnes after art class, darkness falls...