Quote Number 1:
First, a question of favor. To support our site, please download the Alexa toolbar by clicking here.
I have no problem here, I just wanted to DEMAND you get that toolbar. Help a Haolepeno out.

Quote 2: (from 01/28/02)
HHH, your three minutes are up.

Please, be like Wayne Gretzky and not like Michael Jordan.

Please, leave while you still have a little dignity left.
See now that's just stupid. I've only HEARD about his match with Steiner and I know the man has no dignity left. Hasn't since he tore his quad. It's one thing when Scott Keith tells you to lose muscle weight and is right. It's a whole nother when STEVE FUCKING AUSTIN tells you to in Raw Magazine.

Quote 2: (from 01/27/02)
end the brand extension
Hell no. As much as I'd like to be able to watch Kurt Angle (I don't get UPN) I do NOT want HHH to be on the same show as BROCK. Or even on more than one show. Besides, the moment you put the rosters together again people like Richards and Hurricane will lose what little TV time they have to the Edges of the world. Stupid Edge, Eddie attacked your shoulder for over 15 minutes.... YOU CAN'T WIN WITH A SPEAR! *ahem*

Quote 3 (from 01/27/02)
Popular ECW Stars Buried by Vince: Raven, Justin Credible, Tommy Dreamer, RVD (Come on, he’s getting buried, can’t you see it?), Taz, Steven Richards, Mike Awesome, and possibly Rhyno upon his return. ALL OF THESE SUPERSTARS were ECW Champions besides Rob Van Dam, and all have been buried by WWE.
Raven:True for the most part. I can actually see this one.

• Credible:Wrong. Credible has ALWAYS been a heat leech. The Kliq, Lance Storm, X Pac... this guy by himself is nothing. Realistically, he's too small. If you're Credible's size you'd BETTER be able to go like Mysterio. Politically, he's a whiny bitch. He never should have held the ECW belt and if you actually emphasize for him because he went nowhere in the WWF you really need your head checked.
• Dreamer:Wrong again. Dreamer hasn't been around long enough to be officially buried that badly. He still pops a crowd and no matter how often he jobs he could get the Foley treatment in a split second. Unfortunately that probably won't happen because when Tommy was in good enough shape to BE Mick Foley we still had Mick Foley. These days Tommy's just having a good time. I'm glad he has a job because his loyalty earned him one. Could Tommy take the physical stress of main eventing? I doubt it, since he shouldn't even be working hardcore anymore. Then again, you could turn around and say it's his time like it was Foley's... let's move one.
• RVD:Doesn't have the psychology to main event. More than HHH, but he still belongs in the X Division before he does in the WWF main event. I don't care how many cheers the crowd gives him. The crowd is stupid. They'd pop for Sid.
• Taz:Like Raven Alan is pretty much on the money. If they'd let Taz work the style that got Angle big he could've made it in the same way. Through intensity (and before you even think it, Credible has the intensity of Billy Kidman on Ritalin) alone. Height wouldn't have mattered for him, as Shawn Michaels got past that (AND the fact that the homophobic crowd knows he's gay, but that's another story... speaking of living past your prime... Alan REALLY should've pointed out that the RVD/HBK match SUCKED).
• Steven Richards:Richards' own injuries have done more to bury him than management. He simply keeps coming back when the road to the top is too crowded. If Steven hadn't broken his ankle during his Chyna/Jericho segment he'd be at least upper card rather than the male version of Terri Runnels (manager slut)
• Awesome:Please. Really, please. The Gladiator's matches in the WWF were the worst I've ever seen from him. Watch InVasion era shows, and you'll see he was missing the spark he had as That 70s Guy and The Career Killer (after that mind numblingly cool powerbomb of Rhyno through the ladder I mean. That still rules. BTW you'd think Rhyno wouldn't want anything to do with Heyman after being powerbombed through a ladder by his lackeys but logic was never InVasion's strong point.)
• Rhyno:Doubt it. Heyman and Vince have a boner for this guy bigger than my ego when I'm not depressed. He got some GREAT shots in on Rock (And Jericho, but everybody gets them on poor Chris) before he left and I don't see any reason why Rhyno won't be pushed when he returns.

• Lance Storm:Storm is slowly working his way up. He hasn't been booked as well as he was in WCW, but he's friends with Regal who is apparently HHH's dog so we don't have to worry about Lance. Lance was part of Booker's burial but he hasn't been buried that badly. Except by Albert. But who else was buried by Albert? Rey Mysterio. Where is HE on your list Al?
• Hugh Morrus:PLEASE. Demott's been burying cruiserweights in tepid matches with no crowd reaction. Like Awesome, Morrus lost his magic in the move to the WWF. His ringwork is no better than Albert's these days.
• Booker T:First of all, anyone who saw what happened to Jericho, and by anyone I mean Alan, should've already KNOWN Booker wouldn't be getting the red carpet treatment. And even though I've been called a racist by about 300 people on the Online Onslaught board for saying this it remains true, BOOKER IS NOT WHITE AND HE IS NOT A PET PROJECT LIKE THE ROCK WAS. Booker has to overcome all those factors if he wants to be on top. But even Booker himself has stated he's getting close to retirement so I don't know if he has the time to.
• Steven Regal:See Lance Storm.
• DDP:Without Eric to watch his back DDP tends to get buried. Another unfortunate casualty of InVasion.
• David Flair:The Jackie Gayda of 2nd Gen wrestlers. Crowbar wasn't around to carry him in the farm system. Enough said.
• Eddie AND Chavo G:Eddie went over RVD. Eddie feuded with Austin if only briefly. Chavo joined Eddie to participate in how many MOTY candidates last year? You have no case here.
• Malenko:Got a good enough push for a cruiserweight. As good a push as a cw was gonna get when he came in at least.
• Moore:You're kidding right? He's a 3rd rate Hurricane. Without Evan around to make him look good it's obvious why he is just Mattitude's lackey. Dull look, slightly above average workrate... just vanilla. Maybe french vanilla, but he's no Cherry Garcia like Rey or Cappuchino Chunky Chocolate like Eddie.
• Buff Bagwell:Take a note Alan. This is the stupidest thing you've ever thought. Lex Xpress 2 DESERVED what he got. If DDP or Sting had been Booker's opponent in that fateful first look... well Vince still would've pissed on WCW's grave but the match would've been less painful to watch.
• Hennig:The WWF fans would never think of him as anything but Perfect so he hardly counts as buried because of the fans associating him with WCW. He wasn't even part or the InVasion! He riled pet project BROCK so even HE shouldn't have been surprised to get canned. Sure he had to job to Matt pre-Mattitude but he was still doing ok just by HAVING a job.
• Saturn:Got injured too much. See Richards, but without the charisma. His mop was over... him... not so much.
• Johnny the Bull:Mediocre in every aspect of his being. I'd put Hurricane (Who Flair and HHH took out with PUNCHES before TLC4.. Whom you left OFF your list ALAN) and many other long before this guy. And when the hell was this guy popular in WCW? I watched I sure as fuck don't remember.
• Stasiak:Got many chances with many gimmicks and still couldn't set the crowd on fire (like Booker or Y2J or Hurricane). Planet Stasiak was MONEY. If "Gregory" Helms can get something as dumb as running around in a green cape over and not get pushed well THAT is a tragedy. Stasiak unlike most of the guys who got fired on this list could've easily held down a long term role. Why not the idiot who runs into things and plays lackey to main event Heels (like he did with Austin)? They missed an oppurtunity but I'd hardly say Stasiak got mistreated.

Well that's all I'm gonna do since I don't want Alan to quit. I just remember reading that 01/27 column and nearly rolling my eyes out of my head. I tried to be polite in my rebuttals (except Bagwell-fuck him and any of his fans. Don't come back to this site.) and should Alan call me out about anything I said here I hope he does the same. Till next year... your Reality's been CHECKED.


Credits:
Angry Johnny, Dr. Pepper, Tony the Tiger

*swearing*