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May 26, 2002
Alan Edwards
Well, it's about damn time. The weekly rant has become a random rant. Many thanks to my new 60+ hour work weeks at Cedar Point, the top rated amusement park in the world...by guests, not employees. Regardless, this isn't my time to bitch about work...I do that AT work. Today, I'm going to bitch about Hogan, Undertaker, RVD, Vince McMahon, Booker T, and one hell of a lot of other things. So get ready, buckle up those restraints and keep all body parts inside the vehicle at all times...and welcome to Radio Rant, definitely not the oldest ride in the park, but after Space Mountain, it's the second longest line!

What in the hell happened at Judgement Day? I predicted all but two matches, and one I should have figured on, but I still can't get over the main event. I know every damn journalist in the land of Net Smarks predicted the early demise of Hulkamania, but I held out hope. In Montreal, I heard the single biggest ovation I'd ever heard for any wrestler. It wasn't Rocky, Stone Cold or Undertaker...and it sure as hell wasn't Bret Hart. It was the biggest icon in the sport, Hulk Hogan. It seemed at every show the Hogan pops were twice as huge as anything else in the house. The signs were in the hundreds, and the merchandise sales was in the thousands. It was more than significant, it was freakin' obvious. Hogan was the single most over wrestler in the company, he had the strap, and he was the ONLY reason to watch the show at the time. Ratings sunk to an all time low during Hogan's reign. Well, no shit, Sherlock Holmes. Take a look at the pathetic excuse for a show that WWE was putting together under Hogan. Everything else SUCKED, and Hogan couldn't just stand out there for 2 hours a night and pose. Hogan didn't drop those ratings, nearly everything else did. Everyone online likes to talk about Hogan's lack of wrestling ability but forgets that the Rock is no better. They talk about his inability to get around in the ring as he used to, but I haven't seen him favoring those old knees ONCE since his return. They talk about how old he is, but who cares? The goal is... asses in seats, money to the souvenirs stands, and smiles on the faces at the end of the night. Hogan did it all. He shouldn't have lost the title to the damn Undertaker. Are ratings really higher with a heel champ? Boo hoo. Wrestling ratings depend on the whole show, not simply the champ. If the title was on one waist long enough to establish a champ, maybe it WOULD mean something to the ratings. But unfortunately, that's not the case.

Now we come to the decision of who the new champ would be, dethroning Hogan at the top of his live pops, and barely a month into his big reign. Undertaker is NOT championship title material. A decade ago, perhaps it was different. But today, the fans don't want to see him as champ. The heel marks don't even want it! There are 5 Undertaker fans somewhere in Turkey, only cuz they're watching reruns from my freshman year of high school. Angle, Jericho, HHH (if heeling), even freakin' Kevin Nash could be a heel champ. Undertaker can't work a decent match, sell anyone's finisher, or get over as a heel OR face anymore. He's just there, and he's holding that damn strap away from the waist it should be around.

There were alot of missed opportunities the night after JD, and one was the title match with RVD and Taker. It was the perfect opportunity to give the strap to the person who could really take the ball and run with it. Rob Van Dam could take the title, put on top-notch matches, get way over as a face, have a dozen feuds, and retain for a year...and still be fresh, putting over a new top-notch heel like Brock Lesnar at WrestleMania or something similar next year. The older guys like Flair, Arn, and others on the program are still useful, just not in wrestling capacities. The next generation needs to be showcased to get the ratings back. RVD could be the leader, the "Hogan" of the next generation.

Booker T. I wish I didn't have to say anymore, but there are probably plenty of people that missed the obvious opportunity WWE had to INSTANTLY thrust him directly into the babyface main event spotlight. During the nWo segment where Kevin Nash returned and gave some four star mic work, he asked if Booker was in. Booker should've turned around and punked out all of them, unveiled a new finisher and put it on all three, and grabbed the mic. "That's what I think of the nWo, suckas." The music hits, with the WCW style flames, and Booker raises the roof in the ring and walks out. There you go...main event status, a feud with a heel faction, and alot of room for storylines. Booker deserves it.

Vince coming out and killing Hogan's segments may have worked once, possibly twice, but it's getting old now. Hogan takes all that time, he gets over, and Vince comes out EVERY time just to get himself over as a heel. It's cheap heat at it's best, or worst. He needs to stay off TV...the only McMahon that really needs to be there is Shane, because he has a distinct ability to get over as a face. Both McMahons should be extremely limited in their television time, though, to keep it fresh. Otherwise, it will be like it is now...stale and boring.

The old ECW guys shouldn't all be relegated to Heat. Having Sunday Night Heat being the best show of the week for three weeks in a row (the three weeks prior to JD's episode) is not a good sign. Justin Credible, Tommy Dreamer, Raven...these guys should be on one of the main shows. Mark Henry shouldn't be. We need talent that could be used in storylines, and the strongest man gimmick isn't going to make it anywhere. We need top notch heels getting in the main event scene, titles in hands for a lot longer period of time, and something totally new and different. Everything is recycled right now, and THAT is why the damn ratings are so low. Give Heyman the creative control he needs. Put Lesnar over as the next big thing and have him run over everyone, but make sure you keep his ego in check and remind him it's not because he's the best, it's only because they're making him look that way. Push the cruiserweights hard and bring in Rey, Juvi, and Psicosis against Kidman and the others. Bring in Konnan and Hugh Morrus for their size/ability combination and their ability to get over with almost any crowd despite both being held down. Getting the ratings back up is simple...just open up your mind, and your eyes, and give the people just enough of what they want to keep them coming back. THAT is the key to good ratings.

If ya wanna tag me about the article, alanpugh43130@hotmail.com is the way to do it. We hope you enjoyed your ride on Radio Rant, and hope that you do come back again. Remember, we are in no way responsible for any injuries associated with the ride. Get in touch, I live for feedback of any kind. And drop back Monday for Listen to the Radio, the best damn Heat recap on Da Net!

Alan's opinions on Hogan do not necessarily represent Johnny's. But Hell, even uber bitter Cliff Young seems to enjoy watching Hogan so what the hell do I know?