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Shooting From the Hip
Cliff Young
July 07, 2002

DID YOU KNOW...

The "did you know?" is something I'll probably do now and then...just random bits of information that you might not have known, although I'm betting some of you do. Anyways, edition #1: MOVES.

DID YOU KNOW...
Did you know that 2 of the most common and crowd-popping moves ever, the Tombstone piledriver and the Frog Splash, were first done by the late great ART BARR? It's true. Art Barr, best known for being the late tag team partner of a certain EDDY GUERRERO, was the first to do both moves in several Lucha-Libre promotions in Mexico. However, the man most commonly referred to as the original user of the Tombstone is MARK "THE UNDERTAKER" CALLOWAY, and the Frog Splash has since been called Eddy Guerrero's himself.

SHOOTING FROM THE HIP...

Now, here's the chunkage. Yes, I said chunk-AGE, pronounced "chunk-idj" for you jackasses (and NEW YAWKAS) out there. Well, since this is my first Shooting From The Hip in the longest time, where do I begin? I'll just wing it.

Yesterday (Tuesday, 7/16) I hung out with my long time friend Sarah. We walked up to Strawberries, a local music/movies store (and rather large franchise in New England), and browsed through the Used CDs section. She bought The Sex Pistols' classic album Nevermind The Bollocks, as did I, for only $7.99. That's all she bought, but I also bought two other CDs, both used: Biohazard's self-titled, for $2.99, and Atari Teenage Riot's (the industrial band from London, the pop/punk band The*Ataris, who my friend Monica is in love with) self-titled, which was $6.99. All in all, I spent about $23 today, including a post-Strawberries trip to Burger King for a medium #9 (2 cheeseburgers, fries, and a drink). My friend Holly was working at BK, so we said hi. After that, back to my house, where me and Sarah watched the horror classic Re-Animator, which I recently taped off of IFC, the Independent Film Channel, who ran zombie and vampire films all last weekend nights (titles such as Night Of The Living Dead and Dead Alive were also shown, UNCUT).

She almost puked when Herbert West takes the shovel and **THE FOLLOWING SECTION WAS EDITED OUT DUE TO SPOILING THE MOVIE. GO RENT IT YOU BASTARDS!**. Good, good scene. Oh, and when Dr. Hill had Dan's girlfriend **THE FOLLOWING SECTION WAS EDITED OUT DUE TO SPOILING THE MOVIE. GO RENT IT YOU BASTARDS!**. Best scene of the movie, IMO. Where was I? Oh yes. "Cliff," you ask, and I reply even though my name isn't really Cliff (nor is it Drezzy, or Corey, or Lazarus...despite what former e-fed companions and SmarksForum colleagues may tell you), "what does any of this have to do with wrestling?" Well, I'll tell you.

NOTHING. None of it has to do with wrestling. I just felt like telling you the story of a fun day, one of the most fun days I've had this summer (not counting the day I went over my friend Gina's house, where me, Gina, Gina's boyfriend Wes, and our friend Shanarchy {her name's Shannon, but she had this dream one time where I kept calling her "Shanarchy" because she was wearing an anarchy t-shirt, so it stuck}, we all went swimming, and I saw Shanarchy naked while she was changing). Oh...what's that? You want wrestling? I'll give you wrestling...ya fuckhead...

Vince had a good idea by basing Raw on Monday all around different workers, instead of the usual "here's the nWo, here's Brock Lesnar, now pretend you care" formula he's been using for the past month or so. Tommy Dreamer vs. Steven Richards stole the show, in my eyes, as Tommy and Steven proved what a REAL hardcore match is all about: INTENSITY~!~ and DRAMA~!~. The fans actually thought Dreamer would lose the match when he was down, and the blood Dreamer spillt only thickened the atmosphere of the match. Was it necessary? Yes, yes it was. Blood is a great tool for creating a sense of despair and desparation, as well as possible defeat. Wow...3 "d" words in one sentence...
**RON SIMMONS RUNS IN** "DAAAAAAMN." **RON SIMMONS RUNS OUT** Tell me I'm not the only one that saw that coming...speaking of seeing something coming...

NWA: Total Nonstop Action is having its 5th show tonight at 8 PM on Pay-Per-View, and it's only $10. I suggest EVERYBODY buys this show, as the main-event, AJ STYLE VS. LOW KI, is looking to be worth $20 by itself. We're getting it cheap, because Jerry Jarrett, Double J's good ol' dad (and one hell of a smart booker, it seems), knows how to book a great show. Last week's show was headlined by Ken Shamrock vs. Takao Omori (from Pro Wrestling NOAH in Japan) for Shamrock's NWA Heavyweight title, and then the 6-man elimination match to determine the rankings for the X-Title contenders (the first man eliminated was #6, the second man #5, etc.). For full results, check out www.nwatna.com.

Also on the card tonight, "The Fallen Angel" Christopher Daniels and "Prime Time" Elix Skipper, who built THIS house, are facing off against two-thirds of The Flying Elvises in Sonny Siaki (who reminds me of The Rock, only more agile and better in the ring) and Jorge Estrada (who looks like a Hispanic Elvis, right down to the porkchop sideburns and stupid sunglasses). The third member, Jimmy Yang (Yang from WCW's tag team The Jung Dragons), is currently on a tour of Japan. The match came as a result of Siaki and Estrada attacking the final two participants in last week's X-Division rankings match, LowKi (who won and is currently #1 Contender, as can be seen from his match with champion AJ Styles this week) and Christopher Daniels, because they were left out of the match. At first glance, this match seems like filler, but trust me, it won't be ANY less than ***1/2. Daniels was attacked by Estrada and Siaki, and Elix Skipper and Kid Romeo (Hey hey hey...ROMEO~!~) came to their rescue. Daniels and Skipper apparently made the challenge via internet interview, and Siaki and Estrada accepted.
Also on the card:
Muppet The Hardcore Midget Killer vs. Meatball, The World's Largest Midget (4'7" and allegedly 245 lbs.) in a Hardcore Midget Match
Brian Lawler vs. Scott Hall - This match came about from the main-event of Week 3's show, where Hall and Lawler tagged up against Jeff Jarrett and K-Krush (formerly WWE's K-Kwik, the resident rapping black cruiserweight), but Lawler turned on Hall mid-Razor's Edge, causing them to lose the match. Brian then cut a promo about how, when in WWE, he was just overlooked as "Jerry's kid," and now that he's here in the NWA, he'll never be overlooked as just "Jerry's kid" again. He actually cut a good promo, best promo in his career, and made many actually CARE about what he did. Hall then called in via phone from his Florida home, "healing" from the previous week's attack, and challenged Lawler.
Jeff Jarrett vs. Malice in a Ladder Match for the #1 Contendership to the NWA Heavyweight title - Last week, JJ caused a no-contest finish between Shamrock and Omori when he ran-in and knocked them both out with a few steel chair shots (shots that would make Balls Mahoney's look like Lance Storm's from Barely Legal), claiming that HE deserves a title shot. All throughout the show, Minister James (ECW's Sinister Minister, WCW's James Vandenburgh) claimed that Malice (WCW's The Wall/Sgt. AWOL, who has improved by leaps and bounds and looks a hell of a lot better now physically as well), the muscle of The New Church (Tempest, formerly known as Devon Storm/Crowbar, and Slash are the other 2 members), is the rightful challenger. JJ cut a promo on Malice, then insulted members of the Tennessee Titans for not winning the SuperBowl (causing a brawl between Titans players and JJ and NWA:TNA security that wasn't actually supposed to happen), prompting Malice to come down and brawl with JJ. Last week's show ended with Malice destroying JJ in the crowd.

This week's show is going to be good. Last week's was universally praised, and this week's looks to be even better, just based on Daniels/Skipper vs. Siaki/Estrada and Styles vs. LowKi alone. Get out your wallet, save the $35 you'd waste on WWE Vengeance just to see Lesnar's failed push continue, and put $10 on the table, ready for use tonight.

If you don't believe that TNA is quality, think about it like this: The lowest rated match in the past 2 weeks was **1/2, which is your average 6-minute Hurricane/Tajiri Velocity match that every smark virtually creams over. Get this week's show or get Vengeance, but only one of the two PPV exclusives is worth its money...and I'll give you a hint: it doesn't cost $35...

-{The Franchise 2.5}
Shooting from the hip