Memorial Messages And Announcements From Crzy House

WARNING: This page contains posts by Ed (Bester) and Sergio that deal with how they learned that Justin had died. These posts begin with this and progress forward just as they appeared on The Crzy House.

















~Rest In Peace Justin~

  • Possibly extremely bad news -- Bester, 21:11:30 01/12/02 Sat
    20 minutes ago, someone logged onto ICQ under justin the okies SN claiming to be his dad. This person said that Justin, our part time newsman, had died on new years day. I am not sure if it actually was his dad, but at the moment, i am in no condition to question anything rationally.
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  • It is with a heavy heavy heart that I confirm the news that Jusin the okie passed away. I'm so very very sorry. Words are useless... I write this, though tears blur the words. **hugs to everyone who knew him** Justin, we loved you. This is almost impossible to bear... -- Sergio, 21:58:12 01/12/02 Sat
    Justin David Vaughn

    Justin David Vaughn, 15, died Tuesday, Jan. 1, 2002, in Duncan Regional Hospital.

    Service will be at 1 p.m. Saturday in Chisholm Trail Church of Christ with Leonard Keele officiating. Burial will be in Marlow Cemetery under the direction of Callaway-Smith-Cobb Funeral Home in Marlow.

    Mr. Vaughn was born on Sept. 18, 1986, in Colorado Springs, Colo., to Greg and Judith Hilton Vaughn.

    He was a student at Duncan High School and a member of the Duncan High School 9th Grade Academic Team, and he played in the Duncan Summer Tennis Program. He attended Chisholm Trail Church of Christ in Duncan. He was a Marlow area resident for seven years, and attended Marlow School grades three through eight.

    He played football and was a member of the 6th and 7th Grade Academic Team. He was an avid reader.

    Survivors include his father of Duncan; his mother; a sister and brother-in-law, Honey Hufstedler and Stan of Conway, Ariz.; a grandfather, John and Laraine Vaughn of Marlow; an aunt and uncle, Karen and John Austin Scottsdale, Ariz.; a nephew, Zac Hufstedler of Conway; and a cousin, Reed Austin of Scottsdale
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  • Hes dead -- Bester, 22:01:40 01/12/02 Sat
    Serge and I checked on the info his father gave. Its true. there is an obituary. he is gone. Sweet, intelligent, funny justin is dead. Rest well, my friend.
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  • This is one of the most difficult things I've ever had to do. I wish Lance was here. Ed and I discussed this and we decided that this information could save a life. -- Segio, 22:45:45 01/12/02 Sat
    A few minutes ago Justin's father wrote:

    "justin had a good heart and he took a risk that he should not have taken. Please be aware of aea and don't try it. There are people that love you no matter what."

    aea stands for auto erotic asphyxiation or scarfing.

    But we wanted to absolutely do the right thing so Ed asked Justin's father and Justin's fathter writes:

    "please do make this public among his friends. I am making it aware in our town and schools and church. Thank you so much. If this could save one life, it would be worth it."

    [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

    Replies:





  • I can't talk about this tonite -- Lance, 03:34:09 01/13/02 Sun
    .
    Sergio...
    *hug*



  • ... -- eddi, 04:47:57 01/13/02 Sun
    this is the hardest msg i have ever wrote...i dun even know wut the fuck am i writing, cuz my mind is a mush...i can't see cuz its full of tears..i can't hear, cuz idun want to hear...i dunno cuz..i dunno...
    once upon a time..i met this really sweet 15 yr old boi
    hes da best...he really is....
    but hes gone now....
    hes gone...
    justy....
    i love u
    i'll miss u...
    i'll never forget about u
    u are truely the best..
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  • My heart is breaking. How do you say goodbye? -- Lance, 15:13:59 01/13/02 Sun
    I can't believe he's gone. I don't want to believe it.

    Its so senseless. And now one of our kids is gone and there's a great big hole in our family that will never be filled.

    I don't know what I can say to comfort anyone. So many memories. I've know Justin since he was 13 years old. He was a great kid. He and I discussed politics, anti racist action, Mumia. We had all the same underground zines. He was a little baby radical and I loved talking to him, listening to his views. He was a just a baby. He would get so enthusiastic about things.

    And he was a little rock and roller. He had a band. He was so excited when they played a club. It was so cute. I think it was one of the happiest times of his life. Everyone cheering for him up on that stage. We planned it for weeks, on e-mails. And he did great. They loved him.

    He was so intelligent. Such a good writer. I want to thank Dano for posting the poem he had from Justin. I hope everyone who has a copy of Justin's poems and his pictures will share them with others. When AOL shut down our Queer Dollars Campaign, Justin offered to post it on his site. That was so sweet of him.

    I know in 7th and 8th grade, he thought of himself as unattractive, overweight but like the ugly ducking, Justin became a beautiful swan. I'm not sure he ever realized or accepted that he was not only a beautiful person inside, but that he had grown into a gorgeous young man. I hope he knew that. I hope he knew.

    In Junior High, his identity centered around football, partly because of his size and also because of his love for the sport and his talent. But mostly because he wanted his Dad to be proud of him. He was very good at sports and when I first met him, he had dreams of becoming a professional football player. That was his goal. A knee injury put him on the sideline but he really loved the game. Every fall, he would get so caught up in college football. One of the things he loved best was watching a game in person with his Dad.

    This year, he went to a new school, a larger school and he was so excited about it. He wrote to me about the racial diversity and how happy he was to attend a school with african americans for the first time in his life. Justin had very strong feelings about racism.

    He made the tennis tream and really enjoyed the sport but one thing that concerned him was the prejudice against black students that he overheard from a few fellow teammates. This really concerned and angered Justin. He wanted to confront them. Here he was, the new kid in school and he wanted to take on the popular established upper classmen because of their prejudice. Justin had a lot of heart and a lot of courage. He was an amazing boy.

    At his new school he fell in love with a friend. He agonized over his feelings and worried about his friend finding out that he was gay. After a few close calls, Justin decided to come out to his friend. He was so surprised and happy and relieved that it went really good. He was accepted and they became even closer friends. Justin was so courageous. He didn't hide who he was.

    I picture him in my mind, this kid who loved rock and roll and civil rights and politics and I see a younger me in him and it breaks my heart. It breaks my heart...

    I think what could have been. The future he will never have. The things he would have accomplished. The difference he would have made.

    The world has lost a wonderful person

    We've lost one of our own, our little reporter who had visions of trying to walk in Drew's big footprints as one of our most passionate activists. He wanted to be like Drew.

    It is so difficult to write this. I keep stopping because I cant see. I grieve, I rage, I rant, I cry.

    Just a few days ago I wrote, "Justin the Okie - I got you a gig playing the Viper Room every week-end opening for national bands and a years supply of all the hot bois on Sunset."

    It was so unnecessary for Justin to die. It was so stupid and so senseless. I cant imagine what his Father must be going through. To lose his son so suddenly and to wonder WHY.

    We all wonder WHY.

    WHY?

    AEA takes 500 to 1000 young men's lives every year in the United States. Yet, until I watched it on QAF, I didnt know much about it.

    I want all you guys (and girls) to know that this practice will kill you. The fear of talking about it, is that it will give kids ideas.

    We have a lot of young kids on here. Maybe you've never heard of it. Well, now you have.

    It killed Justin.

    AEA can and does kill anyone.

    Sex isn't worth dying for. A thrill isnt worth dying for. If Justin could take it back, he would. He didnt want to die.

    Justin's father wanted everyone here to know how he died, to try to save others from the same fate. He hoped that by talking about this, he can saves other kid's lives.

    Justin, this is so hard. I am so honored that I met you and got to know you these past two years. I will never ever forget you.

    Good bye
    -------------
    "Let's get something straight. I hate Republicans. Let's get something else straight. I hate Democrats. Therefore, I like to consider myself a fairly non-partial observer......My own affiliation, the DSA..."


    "I'm finally writing my first article for the school newspaper, a student letter this time before I join the staff after Christmas. It's explaining my views against nationalism in general and why I don't say the pledge of allegiance in the morning. Wish me luck, I know I'm going to take alot of shit for it anyhow, but I can't stay shjeletered here at this new school forever. Now on with with the news I deem worthy to post =P"

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    "About Christmas --
    If we're just going for the most memorable Christmas, that's without a doubt last year's for me, though Christmas Eve to be exact. December 24th, 2000, was when I came out to my dad. Thats one of those things, that god help me if I ever get alzheimers, will be the last thing to go.

    As far as my fondest Christmas memories, it would probably be from when I was 7 and still living with my mom. That year I got a Super Nintendo AND one of those uber-kewl bazooka things that goes with it. I remember how much I used to LOVE that thing. My mom let me go over to my best friend Natilie's house that night and my mom came over and we all had Christmas dinner together. Hehe...I've always looked at girls more as friends I guess =P...and her mom was SOOOOOO nice, she never thought it odd at all that a boy loved to play with Barbies and the huge stuffed-animal collection I had. Hehe...pretty good memories =)"

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    "I feel all special and warm and fuzzy...I beat Drew to posting a bit of news =P"

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    *smiles*     -- Justin the Okie

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  • And a post from the Shack! -- Wolfie, 15:38:33 01/13/02 Sun
    Date Posted: 14:27:59 01/13/02 Sun
    Author: Comicality
    Subject: A memorial...


    I just recently created a forum, much like this one, to serve as a memorial to Justin. Please stop by and leave a message if you get the chance. Hopefully, I can pass this
    on to his father as a gift from all of us.

    The address is http://www.voy.com/66382/




  • For Justin -- jean, 17:59:55 01/13/02 Sun






    "How does one become a butterfly?"
    she asked pensively.

    "You must want to fly so much
    that you are willing to give up being a caterpillar."



    "You meant to die?" asked Yellow.

    " Yes and no," he answered. "What
    at first looks like you will die, but what is really... you will live."

    This is just something that always comforted me. I hope its comforting to others. Thanks for helping me post this, Serge



  • I just dont know what to say. -- Sprite, 18:56:25 01/13/02 Sun
    A vibrant young life, loved by so many, has ceased to exist.

    Why?
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  • Our Justin is now a rainbow in the sky. -- Luis Jr., 20:32:47 01/13/02 Sun




  • A poem to share. -- Shannon, 21:52:57 01/13/02 Sun
    From a dear friend to a stranger
    who at one time or another said hello,
    nothing can fill the space
    in our heart that is missing.
    Like the pieces of a puzzle,
    no other piece can perfectly match,
    no matter how close one piece may be
    to fitting in another spot.

    Though the sands of time
    may slip through the hourglass,
    though a sunset of one man
    may be the dawn of another,
    life turns so slowly it
    sometimes seem to torment us
    just for the pleasure of seeing us cry.

    Each life is precious,
    to savor the goodness of a first kiss,
    to feeling the sorrow
    of a loved one's death,
    life is different to each individual,
    and we all must learn to
    remember the good times,
    try to discard the bad,
    and when something goes wrong,
    we have to help each other stand tall
    and help to share their sadness and sorrow.

    From birth to death, life is precious.
    Enjoy it for the short time that we live it.




    Dante, 05:52:38 01/14/02 Mon
    Sometimes we take for granted, people who are with us.
    But one day we realize they are gone, and there is no way to bring them back.

    Now we only sit and wonder, what if? Why? We struggle to understand why someone so young and so loved is taken leaving this emptyness. We miss the friendship he gave, the love he felt, and the honesty he had.

    As I think about Justin my sadness grows. I never took the time or the extra minute to get to know him better or to tell him how much he meant to all of us.

    His contributions were given with love and intelligence and humor in his heart.

    He's gone now. The only trace left is the memories in our hearts and minds.

    It hurts. My condolences to his family and friends.



    The group hug remains open and all regular posts suspended until further notice at Lance's request.. -- Sergio, 22:57:54 01/16/02 Wed
    Please scroll down and add your name to the evergrowing list who came to pay their respects to Justin's memory and to comfort and gain comfort from all of Justin's friends.

    Comicality has suggested that we pass this on to Justin's father and we will certainly do that.

    Please invite everyone you talk to, to come share a hug in Justin's memory.

    ~HUGS~




    ~Rest In Peace Justin~