Backstreet X-Change
For those of you that don't know, this is a parody based on the movie 'Speed'. You'll understand this more if you've seen the movie but if not, then you'll still laugh!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The BsB emerge from hiding to do their new "Millennium" tour in the U.S. As they board the tour Bus, Nsync stand together huddled behind the bus….
JC: With this bomb we can bet rid of the Backstreet Boys for good!
Lance: Aww, but I like Nick!
Justin: Shut yo mouth! Nick be crampin’my style, foo’! We gots to get rid of him!
They plant the bomb and run away thinking they have succeeded….
On the bus…
Kevin: I am not sleeping under Howie’s bunk
A.J: Neither am I.
Howie: Hey, why not?!
A.J: Because you drool.
Howie: I do not!*wink,drool*
Nick: Oh, Frick! Can I sleep under you?
Brian: That’s a sin in the bible, Nick..
Nick: I meant the BUNK under you….
Brian: Oh, ok sure…
The bus leaves and BsB do whatever the hell it is they do on the tour bus…
A.J’s cell phone rings…
A.J: Hello?
Caller: HaHaHaHa, there’s a bomb on the bus!
A.J: What?! Who is this?!
Caller: We are the ones who planted the bomb! HaHaHaHa!
A.J: Dawn it, Nsync! How’d you past security?!
Caller: Hey, how’d you know it was us?
A.J: Because everyone else loves us except you and Korn…
Caller: Oh….right. Anyways, if the bus goes below 50 miles an hour, it’ll blow!
HaHaHaHa! *click*
A.J: Dawn it! Yo guys, theres is bomb on the bus.
Brian: What!
A.J: Nsync put a bomb on the bus.
Nick: OH MY GOD!!! We’re all gonna die and I’m still a virgin! I’ll never get a sex life now!!!
Brian: Holy shit! Where’s my bible?! I must pray for a miracle!
A.J: Relax, as long as we don’t go under 50 miles an hour it won’t blow.
Howie: Well, what happens when we run out of gas?
Everyone is silent…
Howie: What?
Kevin: That’s about the smartest thing you’ve ever said.
Howie: Really?!
Kevin: Yeah..
Brian: Hail Mary full of grace, the lord is with thee…
Kevin: Where is the bomb anyways?
A.J: I don’t know, let’s look for it.
They all search high and low and can’t find it anywhere…
A.J: Find it?
Kevin: No, did you?
Howie: No.
Nick: The only I found was this timer with red things that said TNT on them…
A.J: Congratulations, moron. You found it.
Nick: Cool
They all go to where Nick found the bomb and try to disarm it…
Kevin: Howie, you go first…
Howie: Why me?!
Kevin: Because no one will miss you if you blow away.
Howie: Yeah, well, .you’re next buddy. At least I get to actually sing in the songs.
Howie tries to disarm it but sparks fly and he is thrown backwards…
Howie: Ouch!
Brian: Oh Lord!!! Send us an angel
A.J: we’re just going to have to jump.
All: What?!
The bus makes a sharp turn and they all try to hang on. Nick is thrown to the back and lands with a thud…
Nick: I think I broke a nail…
Kevin: A.J is right…we’re just gonna have to jump for it. Howie: I’m not jumping out of a moving vehicle!
A.J: Good, you can drive the bus while we eacape…
Howie:…
Brian: What will we land on?
Kevin: Other than the ground? Good question…
Nick: Fans!!!
A.J: Listen, pretty boy. This isn’t the time to get egotistical…
Nick: No, we’ll just call up some fans and land on them when we jump!
Everyone is silent again…
Nick: What?
Kevin: Whoa, now blondie is getting smart on us.
Nick: Really?
Kevin: Well, just for that second.
Nick: Oh…
They call up a few fans and more than 300 teenies show up. Amazingly, they can keep up with the bus…some on foot and others on bikes. Howie drives the bus while the bus driver leaps to safety.
Kevin dashes to his bunk, grabs his sandals and then jumps. He lands on top of 3 girls with ‘Train’ written across their forehead.
Brian clasps his bible to his chest and leaps. A bright light flashes and he is set down safely in the grass...It seems as if he got his miracle.
Nick grabs all his make-up and hair products and shrieks as he lands on a mattress that his fans brought. He is then ripped apart by those same fans…
A.J. Stuffs as many sunglasses and hair dye as he can intoo his ugly, yellow suitcase and jumps. He lands in a pile of girls all humping at the same time.
The bus continues on into the horizon and explodes when they barely see it.
Kevin: Poor Howie…
Brian: Yeah, in the name of the son, the father and the holy spirit, Amen…
A.J: Anyways…
Howie suddenly pops up limping towards them…
A.J. Dawn it! We thought you blew up!
Howie: At the last minute I jumped…but ther were no fans to catch me..
Kevin: You don’t have any fans, Howie.
Howie: Oh…right
Brian: Hey, where’s Frack?
A.J: I think that’s his arm in that one girls mouth.
Kevin: Poor Nick.
Howie: Yeah…can I have his make-up?
