Does Fate Allow A Second Chance?

Chapter Nineteen
by: thelittletree

"There aren't any ferries that go to the Northern Continent."

Elira furrowed her brow in a little confusion. "What?"

The bulky, aging man, his skin darkened probably through years in the sun, turned around and began punching holes into tickets in preparation for the people who would travel across the ocean. The blue dock master's cap sat awkwardly on his head, a little too small to fit comfortably, and the same colour jacket with the gold lapels strained when he moved his arms, creasing across the back. "You heard me. No ferries go from Kalm to the Northern Continent. Just to Costa Del Sol."

Elira sighed, frustrated by the unforeseen complication. As if the near-disaster with that man, Lud, and his cronies hadn't been complication enough. "Well, can I charter a boat?" she asked, though she doubted she would have the money for it. She was beginning to wish Vincent had told her he didn't sleep before she'd bought a tent for him. Maybe they would have to sell some of their earlier purchases, Elira realized, though she was a little loathe to do it. Even the second tent could come to good use if Elira was forced to put Vincent out with a tranquilizer.

The man chuckled quietly with his back still turned to her. "You could try, miss, but I doubt you'd get any takers. Nobody goes up to the Northern Continent 'cept scientists."

Elira sighed again. "Would you be able to tell me how the scientists get up to the Northern Continent?" she asked civily, though she felt more like demanding that he stop laughing at her predicament. There was nothing about it that was funny.

"Sure." The man continued punching tickets routinely as he spoke, as if serving customers was of secondary concern. "There's a barge that goes up 'bout once every month from Costa Del Sol to take supplies and stuff to 'em. Most just travel on that."

"A barge?" she echoed, her voice cracking wearily. A barge that went from Costa Del Sol once a month. Was that their only option? She rubbed her eyes, still a little swollen with hangover, with her fingertips in no little disappointment. This trip was getting further and further from the quick jaunt up to the Northern Continent she'd been expecting. If they did go to Costa Del Sol, where would they spend the time, maybe weeks, waiting for the barge? And, more importantly, would Vincent be able to live with the unpredictable factor Chaos had become for that long?

She opened her eyes again to see that the dock master was glancing at her over his shoulder, an almost sympathetic look on his tanned, broad-featured face. "I'm sorry I can't help you more, miss, but it's very rare that anyone wants to go up that way." He shrugged. "An' I can't say I blame 'em. All of that business about Meteor and that Shinra guy who went crazy." He shook his head, turning back to the tickets. "Frankly, it scared the crap outta me. An' this's coming from an old seaman who's survived two shipwrecks in his lifetime."

Elira made a sound of disgruntled acknowledgment before pivoting and beginning to walk back the way she had come. However, before she'd taken half a dozen steps, the man called out, "Miss! Hey, miss!"

Elira stopped to look over her shoulder. The man leaned a little out of the booth window, his arms supporting his bulk like thick blue posts.

"What's a girl like you doing headin' up to the Northern Continent anyway?"

Elira didn't feel like thinking up an answer, especially not for this man, so she merely shrugged and shook her head. And then she went on her way, going back to Cloud and Tifa's house to share the pessimistic news.


Vincent found himself frowning in irritation. Possibly a month of waiting; Elira might as well have said twenty years. He'd been estimating another week or so as, upon reaching the Northern Continent, they traveled the paths he dimly remembered walking along with Avalanche. But, weeks of doing nothing but waiting. Waiting for the barge to arrive. He sighed, pushing a hand beneath his bandana to rub his forehead. That would be a long time.

He was a little surprised to realize that the thing bothering him the most about the wait, however, was not the idea of having to battle Chaos. It was the fact that he would be spending it with Elira. And it wasn't just the worries of having to find a place for her to stay comfortably and a source of income so that she could eat, but merely the idea of being with her. It would be too easy...too easy for history to repeat itself. He was already attracted to her, he admitted reluctantly, puzzled by the shadows of life that still haunted him, as if he was...'normal'. As if he could possibly live a life with a woman and have a family with the way he was.

If only fate had allowed me to at least become immune to this kind of thing...

But if fate was anything, it was unsympathetic towards the struggles of man.

The attraction to Lucrecia hadn't taken long to develop into more; it hadn't taken long at all. If he was in Costa Del Sol with Elira, most likely living with her if they could find a cheap place to rent, it would be difficult to stay aloof so that she remained as much a stranger as possible. So that the connection they had wouldn't have the chance to grow into something more...

So that the curse wouldn't be able to harm him, killing anyone he'd ever cared for...

Because, more than just the attraction...he already liked things about her...it had already begun...

Maybe they'd be able to get separate living quarters. After all, they would just be waiting. During the trip so far, he had needed her. He'd needed her to watch him, ready with a dart to stop Chaos before anything happened, and willing to watch over him while he recovered from the drugs. But, waiting in a town meant he didn't need that care; if Chaos got out of hand, he could easily administer the drug himself and then lay low wherever he was staying until he awoke.

He wouldn't need her again until they continued the trip. He wouldn't need her...

Though, he had needed...

He had needed to talk to someone. The crushing guilt of his past had nearly suffocated him in this dark room, brought up again like bile by the crowd of men who had tried to kill him as a 'monster'. But Elira had come to him, and she'd wanted him to talk to her. He hadn't wanted to. But he'd needed to. He'd been a Turk; he'd killed innocent people. He was a monster and he deserved to be killed hundreds of times over. But Elira hadn't said that. She'd said she didn't hate him. And, as if her opinion was the only one that mattered, the guilt had lessened. Someone didn't hate him or fear him. Someone cared about him. Someone thought him worth caring about, even after all he had done...

It had healed him a little; he'd felt it, like the stanching of a mortal wound.

But, he shouldn't need her that way! He couldn't need her the way he'd needed Lucrecia despite the fact that she'd said she was willing. Because he was weak...and love might follow...

And his curse might kill...

Why don't you jusssst forget it, Vincsssent? You knew from the beginning that thissss trip wassss a bad idea. There issss nothing that can rid you of me. Why don't you jusssst go back? I will leave you to your life and thissss girl will not die; it issss ssssimple.

Vincent gave an inward angry chuckle. Leave me to my life? What life can I have with you inside of me?

Chaos didn't answer. And Vincent stirred as Elira spoke.

"So, what do we do now?"

He turned to look at her, seated as she was beside him on the bed in the darkened room he'd awakened in. She was looking up at him; in her lap, she rubbed her hands together, waiting for his answer with a measure of unease.

But the disquiet of her mind was unwarranted. He was not going to turn back now. Even if there was nothing at the Northern Continent that could help him, he had to try. The remotest chance of getting rid of the demon was more of a chance than he'd ever had before.

"We go to Costa Del Sol," he replied quietly.

A small smile crept across her face and she began to nod. It felt good to have pleased her. She stood, but didn't start walking. She just stood, looking across the room as if in thought. And then she turned to him. "I guess I should go buy the tickets."

Vincent nodded once in agreement. He was a little disconcerted to notice that she didn't turn away immediately; her eyes stayed on his face, the corners of her mouth twitching her smile larger. And then she lowered her head in what appeared to be embarrassment at having stared. She cleared her throat. "Well, I'm going. I'll be back in a few minutes." Without raising her head to meet his gaze, she turned and left the room.

And Vincent remained, sitting in the same position for a long time, trying to figure out if the look Elira had given him had been one of pity, or one of something else.


The ferry was huge, easily the largest boat Elira had ever seen, and she had seen a few while sitting on the shoreline as a child, watching the ships go by on the ocean. She spent a full half hour just wandering around with her eyes open, looking at the view from the deck, and then walking through the cafeteria before meandering down to the first lower level to look for her quarters to deposit her things. The trip would take approximately nineteen hours, into the early morning of the next day, so each passenger was given a key upon arriving, the number of their room engraved on the handles. Vincent had gone immediately to find assigned chamber, making sure she knew the number so that she could find him if need be. He hadn't asked for her number in return, however, so she decided that she would remain outside of her quarters during the day in case he needed anything.

The water parted in foamy folds from the hull as the ferry made its slow way toward what was commonly known as the Cosel Continent with such settlements as Costa Del Sol, Cosmo Canyon, and North Corel. Elira strained her eyes to see any land anywhere besides what they had just left behind, but the horizon was rimmed with water as far as the eye could see. It was an eerie feeling to be so far from solid ground, but she just attributed this to the fact that it was her first time on a boat and that she would get used to it over time.

Elira stood at the edge of the deck near the front of the ferry, her arms crossed over the railing as she watched their progress. The salty air refreshed her and she would spend minutes at a time just facing the wind with her eyes closed, letting the scent relax her as her hair was pushed back from her face with invisible fingers. Numbers of people stood around her, either alone, enjoying the ride as she did, or in groups, chatting. She ignored them all, fully engrossed in the peaceful joy the ocean was bringing her.

"Excuse me."

Elira opened her eyes as if coming out of a dream and turned her head to look at the slim man standing beside her. He smiled as she noticed him, his brown eyes twinkling beneath thin-framed glasses. He had sand-coloured hair, not short enough to keep it from being blown back from his forehead in streams, and he didn't look as if he could've been much older than her. She smiled back, curly red tendrils whipping gently around her face.

"My name is Leo Hayden," he said over the grumble of the engines and the sound of the wind. "You looked a little lonely so I thought I'd come over and join you."

Elira's smile became one of welcome, though she realized that in most cases she would've told the person she wasn't lonely and that she'd actually been hoping to spend some time by herself. Being around others her own age often intimidated her, as if they could see through her, into the guilt and shame buried so far inside. But, his smile was so friendly and sincere, and his eyes were so kind and intelligent that she was hard put to deny him her company.

He laced his arms together, leaning comfortably on the railing, looking out at the water as f mystified by it. After a moment, he spoke. "Is this your first time on a boat?"

Elira nodded.

He smiled at her. "Not one for many words, huh?"

She couldn't help but give a chuckle. "Sorry, I guess not."

He shook his head. "No, that's all right. Don't change to please me. So, where're you headed?"

Elira raised an eyebrow. "Costa Del Sol. Isn't that where the ferry is going?"

He laughed, a warm, musical sound. "You got me. I guess I should've rephrased the question. Are you going to Costa Del Sol, or do you have some other destination?"

Elira turned to look back at the ocean. "Costa Del Sol."

"Business or personal?"

Elira frowned and glanced at him. "Why do you want to know?"

He shrugged. "Just trying to be conversational. I'm going home after a long and tiring trip to Neo-Midgar. You see, I have an insatiable interest in ancient languages; but, unfortunately there are no suitable book stores in Costa Del Sol or Kalm." He sighed. "Still, it was worth it. I found two texts on the Cetra that I didn't have before."

Elira looked at him suddenly. He noted her movement and turned to her.

"You have books on the Cetra language?" Elira asked impulsively. She hadn't lied when she'd told Mr. Geddes that she had an interest in the Cetra, albeit a very recent one. As a child, what little information she'd been taught she'd lapped up like a hungry animal, eager for more, but then it hadn't really been an interest. But once that gun with the runes had appeared, affecting Vincent so drastically, the curiousity she'd had in school had come back to her, making her want to learn more about the mysterious people who had saved the earth so long ago. So, although she couldn't see how a knowledge of the Ancients' speech could possibly aid her and Vincent's quest, she was interested.

Leo's smile widened. "Ah, could it be I am in the presence of a fellow historian?"

Elira shook her head modestly. "No, nothing as grand as that. Just a humble gunsmith...well, ex-gunsmith, actually."

He raised his eyebrows and gave a low whistle. "Boy, that'll teach me. I had you pegged as a teacher for sure. You were a gunsmith?"

Elira nodded, feeling a little pride. "Yeah, I owned a shop in Neo-Midgar."

He looked duly impressed. "Now that's something to boast about. Humble indeed. I'm the humbled one here."

Elira hid her smile, turning her head to look to the bow of the ferry, her eyes idly roaming over the form of an elderly woman in gaudy tourist clothes. "I guess that means I'm going for personal reasons since I don't have a business anymore."

"Hmm."

There was a small silence. The elderly woman was complaining to her indifferent husband about something, but Elira could only catch the snippets of conversation brought to her on the wind. And then Leo spoke again.

"Are you going to be staying at the inn?"

Elira glanced back at him before shaking her head. "No, a...a friend offered to lend us his villa while we're there." Her mind wandered back to the conversation she and Vincent had had in the Strife's kitchen just before leaving. Cloud had given them permission to use the huge house, the first President Shinra's old resort residence, that he'd bought on the rebound a few years ago at a low price. He'd said it was already fairly well stocked; that way they wouldn't have to worry about rent or food for a little while, giving them time to establish an income.

"We?" Leo asked abruptly.

"Oh." Elira nodded distractedly. "Yes, I'm here with someone, but he's just a friend." She frowned inwardly, wondering why she'd felt compelled to clarify that to a stranger. It wasn't as if she was looking for a relationship outside of the pre-existing companionship she had with Vincent; just the thought of the complications that would stir made her cringe.

"A villa?" Leo questioned, much to Elira's relief since she had half expected him to wonder about her living in the same house as her male friend. "You're not talking about that massive building over the bar, are you?"

Elira shrugged. "I don't know. I've never seen it."

"Ah."

A pause followed and Elira looked back out to the ocean. The bluish-green water danced in the light wind, gaily bouncing the rays of the sun from one small crested wave to another in a constant game of catch.

"You know, if you like, I could show you my compiled information on the Cetra sometime."

Elira flipped a stray curl over an ear with deft fingers, glancing at him out of the corner of her eye. She couldn't decide if what he'd said had been a come on or just a simple invitation. His expression was innocuous, though; blessedly innocuous. Everything Terry had ever done or said to her had made her feel as if he'd wanted something in return. This man, Leo, didn't make her feel that way. He was just...asking. Discreetly, Elira let her eyes sweep him. He was nice looking in a conventional sort of way; it made her feel a little...special, to think that out of all the women on this boat, Leo had chosen her to come and keep company. She wondered indulgently if she'd caught his eye.

"Maybe," she answered vaguely, not sure she wanted Leo to become more than an acquaintance she'd met on the ferry. "I don't know how long I'm going to be in Costa Del Sol, and I'll probably be working if I can find a job. I might not have a lot of free time."

"Oh, that's fine." He dropped his eyes and began searching through his pockets until he came up with a small rectangular piece of white paper. He handed it to her. Elira turned it over, examining both the name and address that decorated one side.

"That tells you where my bookshop is in Costa Del Sol," he explained quickly, "should you ever change your mind. Also, if you do end up looking for a job, look me up first. I've been thinking about hiring an assistant."

Elira glanced at him over the card. He smiled encouragingly. She raised the paper to her nose to hide the twitching of her lips.

"All right. Thank you, Leo. Maybe I will look you up when we get situated."

He nodded. "Good. While we wait to arrive, however, would you care to get something to eat with me?" He offered his arm. Elira studied him, but could recognize no malicious intent behind the action. He merely wanted to get to know her better; at least as well as she would let him. What was wrong with that? She'd already made mention that the man she was with, Vincent, was no more than a friend.

But, some impulse held her back. She smiled at him apologetically. "I'm sorry, Leo. Maybe another time. Right now, I think I'd better go and make sure my friend is settled in."

Leo shrugged. "Okay. 'Maybe another time' is fine with me." He flashed her a grin. "I'll probably see you around. I can tell you I will definitely be nearby until at least tomorrow."

Elira smiled. Leo turned around and sauntered away with his hands in his pockets. Elira couldn't help the farewell inspection she gave him as he departed, her eyes lingering on the thin but muscular calves showing under loose tan shorts. She wondered briefly if the legs she'd had hers entwined with almost a month back looked this way...and then she shook her head as a heat rose to colour her face. It was better not to think of it.

Elira found Vincent's cabin without too much trouble, but as she was standing in the hallway before the unanswered door she wondered if he'd left his room to come looking for her.

She knocked again. "Vincent? Are you in there?" She tried the knob, but it was locked. She frowned and knocked once more, rapping loudly with her knuckles so that they stung afterward.

After a few moments there was a soft click. Elira tried the knob experimentally and found that it was now unlocked. She opened the door.

Vincent's cabin looked very much like hers: empty, except for a cot against one wall with some blankets and sheets folded over the back railing. A closet was to be found in the other wall next to a tiny half-bathroom and, embedded in the hull, there was a porthole over-looking the water.

At least it's clean, Elira mused.

Vincent was seating himself crosswise on the unprepared bed, where Elira guessed he had been before she'd knocked. He put his back against the wall and linked his booted ankles as they dangled over the side of the mattress. A book lay opened beside him and he picked it up gingerly with his prosthetic, placing it before his nose as he endeavored to find his place.

Elira watched his graceful movements, noting the way his unruly black hair swung around his pale face as he moved. Looking him at him after seeing Leo Hayden was like coming into the dark after being in the sun.

"Having fun?" she asked him after a moment, standing in the doorway instead of coming in and closing the door. Vincent's indifference made her feel a little as if he didn't really appreciate her company right now and she decided she wouldn't push it. They'd been together for days on end; maybe he was feeling the need to be on his own for a while.

Vincent glanced at her out of the corner of one red eye before returning his attention to his page.

Elira smiled. "I was talking with a man a few minutes ago up on deck and he offered me a job as an assistant in his book store in Costa Del Sol." She fished his card out of a pocket and held it out for Vincent to see, as if to prove to him that she told the truth.

He turned his head a little to examine it briefly. And then he resumed his reading. "I was expecting that I would work."

Elira had difficulty suppressing a scoff. "You think you'll be able to work in your condition? The last couple of transformations have been unexpected, to say the least. What if one happens while you're working?" She didn't have to tell him about the possible consequences of that. He could injure or kill someone, and, although she didn't know if there were any facilities in the area of Costa Del Sol that resembled those in Neo-Midgar, it was probable that someone would be more than happy to cart him off 'for science'. There were still too many 'world saviors' out there, determined to deliver humanity from what they considered evil. Elira's thoughts drifted involuntarily back to the man named Lud who'd been trying to get rid of Cloud and his family for years; if he had his world-saving way, he would exterminate the very people who had helped to save the world a decade ago.

Vincent didn't reply, presumably engrossed in the book. Elira gave a small sigh through her nose. "I'm in room 36 if you need me." And then she left the doorway, closing the door behind her as she stepped out into the hall. She would give him time to realize the logic of her words. Besides, it only made sense to have her earning the money since it would be mostly she who would use it for food and other things he didn't need.

Elira didn't run into Leo for the rest of the day, though she wasn't particularly looking for him. After a surprisingly good meal in the ferry's cafeteria, she walked along the railing for a while before making her way back to her room to settle in for the evening.

Vincent didn't appear at her door at any time, but Elira told herself she hadn't been expecting him to and that it didn't matter. She was his friend, nothing more; she didn't need him around twenty-four hours a day. She made her bed and, after preparing herself, climbed in between the sheets.

The rocking of the ship lulled her to sleep, into dreams of days where she'd sat on the rocky shore, watching the boats go by.