"I've decided." I said smiling, finally able to come to a direct decision about anything without regrets.
"Really? I expected you to have doubts, show uncertainty, complain even. This is new." The Raven said, eyeing me suspiciously. I didn't blame it.
"No, I've never been so certain about anything before. I want to do it. Be a muse, help people. Stay on earth, spreading ideas, a pure inspiration. I believe now that that was the sole reason why I was put on earth, to give others that chance to achieve greatness even though I wasn't able to. I realize now that it may not be fair on my behalf, but that's the way it is. I've taken lots of time to think about everything and I'm sure now that I'll accept it for what it was meant to be."
"And you figured out all this without me having to talk it through with you?"
"Looks like it."
"Then, that's good. That's really good. Makes my job a whole lot easier. When it comes the time to plant in your ideas, you will have no trouble doing it. You already know how. I've been watching you. You're bright, figure things out on your own. You know to sense when someone's in need of your aid. You can feel it and pinpoint their whereabouts on earth. You know how to travel around: picture yourself in that place or anywhere near the person you need to help and you're already there. Remember, time is what you make of it here."
"You're telling me all this now, why?"
"You're capable of continuing on your own. You don't need me as your teacher forever. You're a faster learner than the others I've worked with. I'm happy with that. It's always good to see someone able to pick up on a life turn so easily and quickly. It's part of your gift, take it."
"Hang on! You're telling me you're leaving me?!"
"You can take this on your own. With me here, I'll only be holding you back. Take it on your own. It's time for your wings to spread and experience on your own, WhiteRaven. It's better this way."
"But, I may need you later on. I can't figure everything out on my own. What if someone takes my ideas the wrong way, how would I deal with that? I'm Alex's Guardian Angel, what if he's on the verge on doing something wrong? What am I supposed to do then? There are times when I can NOT be on my own!!" I said, breathing heavily, which was strange considering I didn't have to breath at all. I panicked.
"The only one that's stopping you is you. You say you can't. By saying that, you've stopped yourself from ever trying. One word, planted in your mind, has slammed the door on all possibilities. Understand? You can and you WILL be able to handle yourself, no matter what. When the time comes that there will be a major obstacle in your way or in the way of the person you are guiding, then you will KNOW the right of way. You will know the best solution. It will be there for you. No problem. Do I make myself clear, Child?" Raven instructed me. As it was before, Raven was right. I thought myself to be too vulnerable and I fell into that, and believed it. Like an obedient child, I lowered my head.
"Yes, Raven."
"Good. And, I also understand that everyone is NOT 250% independent. I've been around for centuries and plan to be here for centuries more. You're not the only student I've had to teach. There were others and there will continue to be others. Even now, I go to help those students that have taken out on their own with their own decisions. But I'm not a fall-back aid. That's something you have to figure out and pull yourself out of on your own. The help I give you from now on, will merely be simple, brief instructions or advice which you will then have to make understanding of. I am leaving you to be as independent as possible for an immortal. But in any case, for you to keep in mind: I will be here, as a last resort, whenever you absolutely need me to a sense that there's no way out, Whenever You Call, that's when I'll come."
"Thank you, Raven. My Teacher, Spirit Guide. You have no idea what your help has meant to me in the past time ever since my evolution. Thank you so much. You are a blessing." I said, bowing in graciousness.
"It's what you make of it." And with that, the Raven disappeared, the same way as it had come to me the first time I needed it. I understood that I wouldn't be seeing it for a very, very long time.
* * *
If there's one thing I really need to learn, this HAD to be it: Never doubt ANYTHING the Boss Feather had to say. Everything Raven had said to me before, happened. I wonder if it would actually keep up it's word and always be there for me if I absolutely needed it. Woah, hang on, there I go again. Don't doubt it, Raven is always right.
As a matter of fact, everything DID work out fine. Here's what happened:
Jason died from a gun-shot wound to the head. This, I knew before but never mentioned it: Jason was part of a street gang; Demon Crypt. They were big on the street wars, soft and hard drug trafficking, arson, the usual manslaughter, robbery, and black market dealing. Some of the stuff he was dealing on the black market was, in fact, cocaine. (Hence, how he became violently high the first time he tried to kill me.) Everyone now believed that Jason had died in one of those street wars caused by a conflict in the drug dealings.
The ways of the older brother, affected his younger half. Antonio was also a member of Demon Crypt. Plain and simply, he's now serving a LONG time in state prison for numerous charges of drug possession, use, trafficking. He was one of the unlucky that got busted at a street war: possession of a fire arm, manslaughter. With that, he in turn got charged with the other crimes he was involved with since being with Demon Crypt: assisted arson, robbery, blackmail, black market dealing. I feel the right to laugh at his predicament. He just kept digging himself into a deeper and deeper grave. Thank you, Antonio, for showing me the way.
My parents never had a daughter. They, in fact, never got a divorce. As I see it now, my mom is pregnant with her first child. A little boy whom she will name Nicky. Congratulations, mom and dad! Remember I love you.
Dianna, Tavlin, Michelle and Leah had met Kevin, Howie, AJ, Nick and Brian due to a slight "twist of fate" (thanks, Raven). At the right place at the right time, they met when Dianna and Kevin had "accidentally" bumped into each other in the Eaton Center in Toronto. There, they quickly hit it off as friends. At this point, The Backstreet Boys and my four friends (whom, I'm glad to say, had taken the opportunity to start their own singing group, taking on the name I had thought of before Girls of Misstery) were set in LA to film a music video. The video was for The Backstreet Boys song "The One", Misstery being used as extras.
I see now, that my role as a Greek Goddess of Inspiration (a Muse) has gone in quick affect. The "legacy" I left behind from when I was alive had gone on to inspire my friends to carry on what I never got the chance to.
Speaking of which, I made it my personal priority to kindly eavesdrop on the entire filming of the video. Just to see how the Boys and my friends were really getting along, see how things were working out. I also wanted to really use my Muse skills in action. What better place than here?
