First some word from the web master, this story is a real event that happend in the vietnam war. I asked Rick if he could tell me a "funny" story that he remebered, he so kindly agreed to share it with me, and letting me share it with you!
I wish to thank Rick for his time!.
THE GREAT BEER RAID
A TRUE STORY FROM VIETNAM.
First off,let me give you a little background,so you will understand this story a little better. We boonierats were usually out in the field,anywhere from 60-90 days at a time.We were resupplied every 5 days(most of the time anyway).Along with our clothes,sundries,c-rations,and mail,we got 1 beer and 1 coke(always warm of course). Usually after a mission,we got to go back to our base camp(“the rear”,as we called it) for a break aka stand-down. The stand-downs were normally 24-48 hours long.Any major repairs to our equipment,medical treatment,and paperwork,were done at this time. We got to see movies at our outdoor theater or some times a U.S.O. show.The main thing was to go to the EM club (Enlisted Men’s club),for some cold beer,sodas.or mixed drinks. Being as we were out in the jungle so much,we became a little brash,crude,and rowdy.It was our release to the hostile environment.We lived on instinct and cunning.We had no contact with anyone but enemy forces.So when we went back to the rear,we really let off a lot of steam.
The REMFs (Rear Echelon Mother Fuckers),didn’t like us,so they hated it when we came in for a stand-down,because we were so rowdy and crude.
Now back to the story
We had been out for about 70 days,in a place called the Ashau Valley.It had a high concentration of enemy forces.We were in Firefights (small battles) almost every day.Our Captain came down to tell us that we were going in for a stand-down.And damn,we needed one.
The next morning we were choppered back to Camp Eagle,and let me tell you,we were some excited troops.
The first thing we did was to check our equiptment to make sure it was in good working order.The next thing was to get medical attention,and read our mail.Then we got our clean clothes,took showers,and got ready to PARTY! The first bunch of us went down to the EM club.When we got there,the guy running the place said “ this club is closed to you fuckin’ boonierats”.They had all the doors locked,so we couldn’t get in. Man! We were pissed off!We went back to the Company area and spread the word.
Now, a bunch of pissed off boonierats, is not a pretty sight.Some of the guys wanted to go blow the hell out of the place.Others wanted to wait until the place was full of remfs,then shoot it up.Anyhow,there were all kinds of suggestions to make those bastards pay. It was dark by this time,and everyone was needing something to drink.Finally.someone said”Fuck those remfs,I know where there’s some beer.””There’s pallets full of cases of beer down by the PX.”
We all knew what he was talking about.Down by the PX ,there was a fenced in storage area,where the beer was stacked 10 feet high on pallets. After a quick strategy meeting,135 armed boonierats sneaked down the road toward our objective.Someone had even “borrowed” a jeep.We cut through the fence,then we liberated as much beer as we could.We had cases of beer stacked all over that jeep.In the seats and on the hood.We were carrying a case of beer in one hand,and our M-16s in the other.You can imagine what a sight that was,as we headed back to our Company area.
Now,behind our Company area,were trenches,they were dug in case Camp Eagle,was assaulted our for rocket attacks. We brought all the beer back and put it in the trenches.Man! we were whoopin’ and hollerin’,really proud of ourselves,Another successful mission. Then someone said”Fuck this shit,I wanted a cold beer.I’m tired of warm beer.”We all stood around nodding our heads,wishing for a cold one. Another said”Hey, there’s an ice machine on the back porch of the EM club.Let’s go get it,that’ll teach those son-of-a-bitch remfs not to fuck with us.”
So we hatched another brilliant plan to capture the ice machine.About 30 of us snuck down to the EM club.The place was full of remfs.We could here them bragging on how they put us boonierats in our place. Well,we slipped up on the porch,unplugged it,lifted it up,and took off.Those stupid remfs had no idea what was going on.That ice machine was full of ice and weighed a ton.Even with all of us it was a struggle,but we made it. We knew those remfs would eventually find the ice machine missing and come looking for it. First we put the beer and ice in a container similar to a horse trough.Then we set out our claymore mines,and locked and loaded our weapons.
A couple of guys brought out their radios,turned ‘em up full blast,and we started to PARTY! Sure as hell,a little while later,here comes the EM club manager,and some other remfs,with a tow motor.He said”You goddamn boonierats,give me back my ice machine.” Our reply was”Fuck you,asswipe.You just try to take it,and we’ll blow all you remfs to hell!” It was about that time when they notice the claymores,and that we were locked and loaded.So these assholes back up a little.Then one of the whiners went to call our Battalion Commander.When he got there he was not a happy camper.He listened to the club manager and the other remfs as they told their bullshit story.He then came over,and asked what happened.We told him that they wouldn’t let us in the EM club,and what we had done.
Well, the Battalion Commander just shook his head.Then he looked at the EM club manager,and said,”Any time,And I mean ANYTIME!,my men come in out of the field,they will be served at the EM club.That club belongs to the U.S.Army.not to you!These soldiers just spent 70 days humping the boonies with 80 pound rucksacks on their backs.They deserve to have a good time when they get back here.You all will take good care of them,anytime they are here.Understood?””Or,maybe you would like to tar their place out there?” Those remfs just shuffled off,not saying anything.
The Battalion Commander,grabbed a beer and said “Carry on men.” And left. The next day,as we were loading back on the choppers,the club manager was waiting with the tow motor,to take the ice machine back.He wouldn’t come into the Company area,because we kept our weapons on him.He was still standing there as we lifted off. The Battalion Commander wasn’t done with him.For the rest of his tour in Vietnam,He had to pull security on the garbage runs. That is the true story of The Great Camp Eagle Beer Raid.
Boonierat
