TRAITS by Kathryn Hughes - PG-13 

Usual disclaimers apply – Paramount and Viacom and the whole host of 
other incredibly rich people who own Star Trek own everyone – Kathryn 
Janeway, Chakotay, Tuvok, Seven, Harry, Tom, B’elanna etc but a few 
people actually belong to me!  They are Ensigns Pederson, L’elloni, T’jour 
and Crewman Stewart.  I’m not particularly bothered what happens to them 
– take them, kill them in shuttlecraft accidents in your own fan fiction, have 
them marry each other – I’m not bothered!!!

 Granted the idea isn’t too original (a mixture of Year of Hell and Timeless) 
but its my first fanfic so be kind!

Dedicated to all at Heather’s P/T message board at 
http://members.tripod.com/~pandt4ever - Thanks for giving me encouragement! 

Traits –6 years into their journey Voyager picks up a distress signal from 
another ship claiming to be Voyager, before the ship is destroyed 
some of her crew are beamed aboard our Voyager, including a very human 
Seven, Captain Naomi Wildman and one Doctor Kathryn Paris. 

I'm not very good at stardates so they are represented by _______

The dates are based on the premise that Voyager entered the Delta quadrant
in 2371.

Enough of my rambling - on with the story!
************************************************************************

Preoti 8 -Penal colony
2403 – June 17th 8.22am
 “Keep moving!”  Kathryn reached a hand out to the fallen crewmember as 
she scanned the corridor around her.  She could hear the thud of heavy 
boots, what, about 10 metres away, probably right around the corner.  The 
crewmember scurried away, she couldn’t quite remember his name, 
Johnson or something similar.
The thuds were getting closer now as the ground beneath her shook and 
more white dust settled on her head, sticking to her greasy, matted hair. The 
footsteps neared and she began to run again, rifle firmly under her arm, 
finger on the trigger, ready for any eventuality.  Her arms ached and the 
pain that emanated from her port was excruciating but she knew it wasn’t 
enough to kill her, she’d made sure of that.
Around the corner and she realised she hadn’t looked behind her for a good 
minute, she kept running though, ignoring the feeling that she was being 
watched.  She could see Batehart, T’jour and Johnson up ahead, the sunlight 
illuminating their darkened features.  Still as her legs moved, pushing her 
body reluctantly through the long dark corridor, she knew in the back of her 
mind that they were behind her.  A phaser was fired over her shoulder; the 
golden beam hit the ceiling, white plaster floated down.  Kathryn stopped, 
the pain in her legs willing her to drop to her knees, but she wouldn’t let the 
pain win, she wouldn’t let them win.  Her chest tightened as a sharp 
implement was placed violently between her shoulder blades.  Kathryn spun 
quickly and looked the man in the eye, the implement still pointed in her 
direction.  She stiffled a laugh, this was poetic justice indeed.
“Paris,” The man drawled, a lechorous glint in his eye.  “Why run away, we 
had some good times you and I.”  He reached a hand out and cupped her 
chin, stroking her cheek with his thumb.
She wasted no time, her gun was up in an instant, her finger squeezed the 
trigger, the blue flash hit him right in the chest, a cry of pain and he was 
gone.  A wry smile crept over her lips, charming he may have been, but 
stupid he was, right up until the end.


8.34am
“Kate, over here.”  It had taken her no time at all to cover the rest of the 
corridor and be up the ladder and out into the sunshine.  Three guards had 
been disposed of on the way but to Kathryn they were momentary 
interruptions.  Her two teams had completed their job well, the three 
transports were theirs and an infantry of about 7 held off the advancing 
threat to the North.  She swung her rifle over her shoulder and wiped the 
mixture of mud and sweat away from her brow.  Nick Batehart’s smile 
greeted her as she headed towards the third shuttle, a dead guard lay at his 
feet.
“Well done, Nick.  Ok, how are you going with those encription codes?”
A call came from inside the transport.  “Child’s play, we’ll be able to leave 
in about 2 minutes.”  Steven T’jour poked his head outside the shuttle like 
ship and beamed at her, a smile she had not seen in a while.
“Are we all here?”  Kate asked, giving in to her aching legs and sitting 
down on the brown grass.
“Beta 2, didn’t make it.  We think they came under heavy fire when they 
went to take the generator out.”
“Were they successful?”  Kathryn asked, she shouldn’t have put Stewart in 
charge of Beta 2, he was too young.  A skill she had acquired, allowed her 
to put that thought to the back of her mind, to resurface later or never again.
“We have no way of knowing.”   A volley of shots rained down on the 
complex from above.  The square like boxes that had been their prison for 
the last three months were being reduced to rubble, a sight that Kathryn was 
enjoying watching.
“We’ll have to go to plan B.  Steve, where’s Thania?”  She called into the 
shuttle, Steven shrugged and went back to jump starting the ship. 
Nick grimaced.  “Thania’s port blew when she passed through the field, she 
mustn’t have configured it correctly.  We’ve got Cator on communications.”
Kate processed the information and then began to run through what she had 
to do next in her mind.  So, maybe her way of fixing the port wasn’t 
foolproof, now wasn’t a time for guilt.
“So, it’s nice of Voyager to come and join us, isn’t it?”  Cator said, sonic 
spanner in his hand walking towards them, casting a look into the sky.
“Good, Cator can you get through to the ship yet?”  Kathryn asked, she had 
little time for congratulations.
“Transport 2 over there has an open comm line to Voyager, we’re all ready 
for lift off.”  Cator smiled, he hadn’t had this much fun in nearly three 
months.
“Right, we all know where we should be.”  Kathryn stepped away from the 
little meeting and ran towards Shuttle number 1.  Sanchez, a handsome 
young ensign, came running towards her.  Behind him followed Hamilton, 
Nicoletti and Bristow.  Where was Oakes?  Then she could see him, Oakes 
was carrying Lacey and Gallagher was there too, struggling to keep up.  In 
silence, Kathryn watched Alpha 2 run towards her, the orange glow of 
enemy fire shooting between them.  She reached for her rifle and then 
opened the door to the transport, throwing herself inside.
She counted the members of her team, as they filed inside, Gallagher and 
Hamilton hung back to return fire.  One missing.  
“T’jour’s not here!”  She shouted to Sanchez, there should be nine to each 
shuttle and he was the one missing.  To her left Kathryn could see Shuttle 2 
taking off, firing a few shots at the destroyed complex for good measure.
“Paris to shuttle 2,” it was loud in the shuttle as phaser fire was exchanged 
behind her, a quick glance to her left and Kathryn could just about make out 
20 or 30 guards coming over the hill.
“Cator here.”
“Is T’jour with you?”
“No, I thought he was with you.”
“Doesn’t matter, Paris out.”  Well, it didn’t matter.  If he couldn’t get 
himself on the right transport, then he deserved to be left behind.  She’d 
explained it a thousand times, back in the cells, in-between her regular visits 
to Traylor.  Everyone understood the score, with that thought Kathryn 
prepared for take off.
“Batehart to Shuttle 1”
“Paris here.”
“We’re leaving, see you there, Batehart out.”
Sometimes, Kathryn’s sentimental ways got the better of her.
“Wait!”  She said, fully intending to ask Batehart if he’d seen T’jour.  A 
phaser blast interrupted her.  She heard a scream from outside and realised 
that the advancing guards were nearly on them.  Her feelings as to the 
whereabouts of her missing friend were stored away, until she realised that 
the scream had been his.
“Pull him in!” Sanchez screamed, pulling at his uniform and his hair, 
frantically pulling at anything to try and get him aboard as Kathryn began to 
manoeuvre the shuttle off the ground, firing aft phasers at the oncoming 
marauders.
“Shit!”  Kathryn said, slamming her hand down hard on the console.  “I’ve 
lost inertial dampers and it looks like they’ve given us a nice dent in the 
paint work along with it.”  Kathryn was surprised at that remark, she was 
never usually flippant.  Still, dormant training that she hadn’t used in years 
all came flooding back as she began to compensate and pull the shuttle off 
the ground.  She fired all weapons blindly, not enough time to target 
anything as she pulled up.  The wind was coming in fast now from the open 
door, it would need to be shut for them to leave the atmosphere.
“The door!”  Another phaser blast hit the shuttle and it rocked, throwing its 
inhabitants to the right.  Hamilton punched the command into the panel near 
the door, it began shut slowly, far more slowly than it should, and then 
inevitably it stopped.  Hamilton banged her fist against the wall, wishing the 
old cliché, so near yet so far, didn’t apply. 
“We’ll have to rely on shields.”  Nicoletti said from the co-pilot’s seat.
“We’ll never survive under fire,” Bristow returned in a pessimistic tone that 
had become all too normal coming from him.
“We’ll have to.”  Kathryn said resolutely as they climbed higher and higher 
into the atmosphere.  Shuttle 3 was hitting warp in the distance, Batehart 
was Voyager’s chief conn officer though, Kathryn, well she was its doctor.
“Cator to Paris,” There was some interference on the line but the quiver of 
fear was obvious to any ear.  “I’m losing altitude, impulse is gone.  
Suggestions?”
“I’ll tractor you,” Kathryn turned behind her.  “Hamilton...”
“Already on it.”  Beth Hamilton began to work away, not quite familiar 
with this aspect of the shuttle but improvising well.  “Got them.” All on 
board felt the shuttle slow and stutter slightly.  An alien freighter was 
suddenly at their stern, its fire causing Kathryn’s station to explode.
“Engines,” she shouted as she moved away, reaching for a fire extinguisher.  
“We need more power to pull away.”  She sprayed the CO2 and felt better 
as she realised the shuttle was going slowly upwards again with a fluent 
movement.
“Well done Beth.”  Kathryn said with gusto, ignoring temporarily the look 
of despair on the young woman’s face.
“Erm, Kate, shuttle 2 has been destroyed.”  Beth looked down, hoping her 
superior wouldn’t see the tears running down her face.  She remembered the 
verbal battering Paris had given Lacey when she had broken down on their 
first evening at the camp.  Paris was almost Vulcan in her reaction to 
emotion, but Beth knew she’d had a fair share of her own to deal with.
“I assume we can go to warp.”  Kathryn said after a pause, she was going to 
get them home, she was going to get them to Voyager.
“Aye Sir,” Sanchez said, from behind her.  “I’ve re-routed power from 
weapons to shields, our temporary door should hold.”
“Good, going to warp 2.”  Kathryn let herself relax as the shuttle jumped 
into life.  She looked back to see T’jour sprawled out on the floor of the 
craft.  Blood where his port had been.
“Is he alive?”
“Yeah, it didn’t have its full effect.”  Oakes replied wiping away the blood 
with a bandage made of his uniform.     

*************************************************************
**************

USS Voyager
2377, October 22nd 12.45pm
Delta quadrant 
Anya Pederson walked into the mess hall her eye lids heavy, her recently 
left bed feeling very inviting, half a mind to go back to her quarters.  She 
nodded to her friend, standing and calling her name, her loud beckoning 
hurt Anya’s ears.  She picked up a mug and poured herself a cup of Neelix’s 
special ‘brew’ and made her way to sit down next to her friend and well-
known gossip mongerer, Connie Parsons.  Sitting at the same table was 
Cameron Stewart and a man of few words, which was strange considering 
the company he kept, Paspel T’jour.  An unlikely bunch, she conceded but 
the four of them were as close to family as friends got and so far from home 
that was often very comforting.
“So, honey what’s got you all depressed?  Bad morning shift?”  Connie 
Parsons asked the question with sympathy, she knew what it was like to 
have a bad day.
“Huh?  Oh I called in sick for alpha shift.”  Shocked looks passed between 
her friends.  Annie as her friends affectionately called her had never been 
sick a day in her life, and would probably have crawled out of her deathbed 
to do alpha shift with the captain.  It happened so rarely that she could step 
in for Tuvok at tactical ops.
“You never, and I mean never call in sick.  What happened and if it is 
contagious get the hell away from me.”  Crewmen Stewart and Parsons 
laughed, T’jour just stared impassively at his friend.
“I thought you’d have wanted to get sick Cam, so you could spend time 
with a certain Ensign L’elloni.  I was meaning to ask you, how did your 
‘thing’ as you insist upon calling it go last night?”  Connie loved this.  It 
had never been a pastime of hers when she had lived on Deep Space 4 to 
divulge in petty gossip but with the loneliness that Voyager had given her, it 
helped to know that someone else was having fun.
“Knowing my current run of luck, I’d get the holodoc in one of his 
infamous bad moods if I ever happened to need medical attention.  I would 
never get the sweet angelic face of Claire leaning over me as she checked 
for viral agents.”
“I trust it went well then.  So, come on Annie tell us, what’s up?  No 
offence but you don’t look ill just tired.”  Although Connie was dying to 
know what happened between Cameron and Claire she placed the well 
being of her friend higher than a good bit of gossip.  Little did she know 
that asking Anya such a simple question would lead to an even better 
snippet.  “Got it, you didn’t get any sleep last night did you?  So who is the 
lucky man?  You’ve been holding out on us for so long after the whole 
Bristow thing.”
“Don’t bring the Bristow thing up, Connie,” Anya said visibly squirming.  
“It was one long embarrassing date, an experience I would care not to 
repeat.  No, anyway there is no man, well there is, but he’s got a wife, a 
very loud wife may I add and it was those two who kept me awake last 
night.”  Anya had let her secret slip earlier than she had intended but she 
still wanted to see Connie’s face when she worked it out.
“Ew, yeah I know it is really embarrassing when that happens.  I mean it is 
just plain annoying.  You are looking at the woman who has shared walls 
with other, how do I put this ‘active’ members of the crew.  I don’t know 
how many sets of ear plugs I replicated, I was very glad when they returned 
to just ‘friends’ I can tell you.”  Connie laughed at her own recollections; 
Cam and Anya joined her.  Still T’jour remained silent almost solemn.
“No, no it seems that there is trouble in paradise for our favourite senior 
staff pairing.”   That was Anya’s nickname for them because she had won 
herself a bucket load of replicater rations predicting that those two were 
going to be the first senior staff couple.  No one had considered them at all 
when placing their bets, even the Holodoc and Janeway had had better odds.
“Paris and Torres, really?  They seemed so... I’m searching for a word here, 
erm, stable recently.  Almost boringly stable for our friend Mrs Parsons.”  
Cam smiled and took the small punch on the arm that Connie gave him with 
a broad smile in her direction.
“So, tell me.  What was it about?  Any mention of a certain holodeck 
programme that I didn’t mean to find, and I definitely didn’t mean to 
mention to Chief that I had found.”  Connie said smiling.
“No, but you are going to tell me about that programme later.  No it was 
really serious, I mean I couldn’t tell what it was about, the walls aren’t that 
easy to hear through but boy were they shouting, and they were throwing 
things too.   And before you make any smutty comments about Klingon sex, 
this was definitely not throwing things in a nice way, if indeed you can 
throw things in a nice way.  I mean it was vicious they must have been 
shouting for at least 5 hours. I tried to get to sleep and was nearly there 
when Caspir their other neighbour hailed me and said that we should ask 
them politely to shut up.  I mean they were quiet after that but it was already 
0400 hours and you know how much I need my sleep, so to cut a long story 
short I took the morning off.”  Anya had cut her story short for a reason, 
Paspel had given her a long ‘be quiet’ stare that she had tried hard to ignore 
but in the end had felt forced to give into.
“She’s pregnant.  It’s hormones I suspect.”  Connie said trying to make light 
of the situation.  Her friends all now carried worried looks and she couldn’t 
for the life of her understand why.  Paris and Torres, the whole will they 
won’t they thing had been the topic of many a conversation between the 
friends, she knew Paspel disliked the gossip she didn’t really realise he 
disliked it this much.
“Okay, T’jour what is wrong?  You have been frowning like that ever since 
Annie sat down, actually you were pretty glum before.  It’s just a bit of 
harmless gossip, come on it’s Paris and Torres we are talking about here, 
they always kiss and make up.  It’s not like we have any reason for concern, 
I mean they are having a child.  Why should we care anyway, I mean it 
doesn’t really matter to us does it?”  As soon as she’d said it she knew her 
words were hollow.  What all four understood non-verbally was that Paris 
and Torres were more than just another piece of gossip for them.  They all 
relied on the numerous stories about them to pass by their own lonely 
nights.  Other gossip was interesting but never as interesting as Paris and 
Torres, they almost gave the words ‘complex relationship’ a totally new 
meaning.  What people and especially the subjects of the gossip often didn’t 
realise was that the rumour spreaders were actually just after some hope that 
this ship wasn’t some kind of prison after all.
“I think that this may be the end.  I know for a fact that Paris has asked the 
captain for new quarters for both him and Torres.  They are going to live in 
the same quarters but they want different bedrooms.  He said it was just 
until the baby was born, I’m not so sure.”  T’jour spoke his words softly.  
This was very different to his usual behaviour; Paspel had a lot of 
opportunities to access ‘protected information’ when he ran his computer 
repairs programmes.  He even had the authority to change the self-destruct 
program with the captain’s approval.  Connie always thought that Paspel 
was above her level of snooping.  Obviously she was wrong.
As the four friends digested what Paspel had just let on, Tom Paris entered 
the mess hall.  As soon as he had his food he saw where Anya was sitting 
and decided to detour on his way to Harry so that he could apologise.  Anya 
was a nice girl, very young, she had graduated the academy the same year 
as Harry but she was infinitely worldlier wise than Tom wondered Harry 
would ever be.  He felt especially bad when he realised she was absent from 
the bridge this morning.  She so rarely got to do alpha rotation he felt really 
guilty he had deprived her this chance to show what she was made of.  She 
was sitting with her usual gaggle of friends, Parsons from Engineering, 
Stewart from stellar cartography and T’jour who looked after the computers 
with Harry.  All were well known for their ability to spread gossip.  Maybe 
he should avoid them.  No, he didn’t care what comment Parsons or Stewart 
made he owed it to Anya to apologise.
“Speak of the devil,” said Cameron as the tall figure of Tom Paris came up 
behind Anya.
Although Paris had ignored the remark he wished that he knew exactly 
which aspect of his life they were talking about, he didn’t want Parsons 
shouting her mouth off.
“Hi, Anya.  I just wanted to apologise about last night.  I’m sorry we kept 
you and Caspir up.”
T’jour was suddenly concerned with the look of anger on Anya’s face.
“Erm, yes well I’d like to say ‘oh it’s okay’ but it’s not really.  I mean I 
need my sleep, I have tough stressful days like everyone else.  Just bear in 
mind that next time I bang on the wall repeatedly it may be for a reason.  
Caspir is over there, I think he’d like you to apologise to him.  He was not 
happy when I left him last night.”
Tom was slightly shocked by this.  He always had Anya down as easy 
going; he realised though that even relaxed people had their breaking points.  
Her lack of sleep last night was obviously a sore issue with Miss Pederson.  
T’jour gave Annie a look that said ‘that was harsh, apologise’.  Annie took 
his advice as Tom Paris slowly slipped away.
“Tom, you can make it up to me though if you come to my recital here on 
Friday at 2000 hours.  Mozart and Bach will be the order of the day, should 
be fun.  It took me long enough to get all the credits to replicate the piano in 
my quarters, I want to show off my newly polished skills.”  T’jour smiled as 
he remembered seeing all the pieces of piano sprawled over her quarters as 
she tried to fix them together.  He was looking forward to the recital, her 
music had always been absolutely perfect, almost enchanting.  In his 
opinion far better than Harry Kim and that Clarinet he was always playing.  
Still that was T’jour’s opinion, the fact that Harry Kim was also his direct 
superior had a lot to do with Paspel’s disdain for the instrument.   
“Oh yeah, erm I’ll try to make it.  Can’t promise anything as B’elanna’s due 
soon.”  Tom walked away and only allowed a quick glance over his 
shoulder to see if he had upset Anya.  She was smiling at her friends and 
seemed to have paid his answer very little attention.  Despite appearances 
though Anya was still very annoyed with her neighbour.
Tom made his way to Harry who was sitting alone staring out the window 
in the corner of the mess hall.
*************************************************************
*************
USS Voyager – 2403  8.57am
“Annika, come here and help me get Steven out.”  Kathryn called as she 
saw Annika Hansen walking towards her in the dimly lit shuttle bay.  
Annika grabbed the man roughly and began to pull him out of the shuttle.  
“Carefully, Annika, carefully.”  She lessened her force and picked him up, 
carrying the young man easily.  “Red alert?”
“They seem to have friends,” Annika replied coldly, grimacing slightly she 
stumbled and them regained her balance.  They headed out of the shuttle 
bay, Hamilton ran past them.  Oakes was behind, still carrying Lacey.  
Nicoletti and Bristow had not hesitated to get to engineering, Gallagher was 
no where to be seen.
“Still hurt?”
“Yes” They were in the corridor now, heading towards the turbolift that 
would take them to sickbay.  “She’s going to do it,”
“So she should,” Kathryn replied, stepping into the turbolift, all the time 
keeping two fingers pressed on Steven’s neck.
“The Captain has insufficient understanding of cosmic strings, she will most 
likely get us all killed.”  It was good to be back to her old self, the influx of 
emotions had almost been too much to bear, Annika reflected.
“She can handle it.”  The doors to the turbolift opened and they stepped out, 
back in another corridor, still heading for sickbay.  It seemed though that 
Oakes, carrying the injured Lacey was not behind them.
“I wish I shared your confidence.” Annika said, still carrying Steven with 
ease.
“Sickbay, it is so good to be home!”  Kathryn exclaimed as the doors 
opened to reveal sickbay, pretty much as she had left it.
“I think it missed you.”  Annika said, a broad smile on her face.
“You’re still not fully recovered are you?”  Kathryn asked, running to pick 
up a medical tricorder and pointing to the biobed where she wanted Steven.
“It would appear not.”  Annika said, gently laying Steven down


USS Voyager – 2377 1.05
“Hi Tom,” Harry said as Tom sat himself down opposite Harry.  Harry said 
nothing more and continued to stare out the window.
“Hey, what’s the matter with you?  You looked fine on the bridge this 
morning, your usual smiling self and now you’re sitting here like the 
world’s falling down about your ears.  I’m speaking of worlds 
metaphorically of course, unless we are on some collision course.  Is there 
something you’re not telling me Mr Kim?”  Tom’s happy demeanour was 
not at all reflecting the way he was feeling inside.  But looking at Harry, 
Tom realised that the one thing Harry didn’t need to know was someone 
else’s troubles.
Tom’s words had hit a nerve and Harry grimaced at their accuracy.  He still 
remembered the way he had looked when he had sent a message back to 
himself, that was a Harry Kim he never wanted to be.  Harry decided to 
change the subject.
“So, what’s the news then?  I saw you talking to the Public broadcasting 
service over there, anything worth sharing?”  Harry nodded towards where 
Anya and her friends were sitting.
“No, I had to apologise to Anya.  Erm, she didn’t really get much sleep last 
night because of B’elanna and I.”  Tom hoped desperately that Harry would 
not ask him why they had kept Anya up all night.
But Harry wanted to get away from his own wallowing and asked Tom “Oh 
is that why Anya didn’t report for bridge duty this morning?”  
Tom stuttered over his answer but was saved as Harry’s mind wandered.
“She’s nice Anya, I mean I don’t know why she hangs around with Parsons 
and Stewart.  I definitely don’t know why she’d give T’jour the time of day.  
He is the most smug, conceited, self satisfied individual I have ever had the 
misfortune to encounter.”  Harry began to angrily move his food about his 
tray.
This was not usual behaviour from the normally sweet and forgiving Harry 
Kim.  Tom was worried but in his own rather precarious emotional state it 
may not be a good idea to delve further.  Tom decided to lighten the mood.  
“I take it you don’t like him then.  I agree though Anya is nice.  She’s got a 
recital on Friday, I don’t think I’ll be able to make it what with B’elanna 
and all, why don’t you go.  You could swap notes on how to get good 
acoustics aboard a star ship.”
“T’jour will be there, I don’t think I’ll go, there’s other stuff I could be 
doing.”  Harry said placing some of Neelix’s casserole into his mouth.
“Like, holing yourself up in your cabin and reading efficiency manuals.  
Sounds like lots of fun, anyway why should it bother you that T’jour will be 
there?  I mean I know you don’t like him but never enough to actively avoid 
him.  What’s he done?”  Tom asked genuinely interested rather than just to 
avoid talking about himself.  Harry had never been as vocal about his 
dislike for other crewmembers before.
“Nothing, he hasn’t really done anything.”  Harry stood up and stared out 
into space one last time and then picked up his tray and began to head away.  
“We’d better get back to the bridge.”
Tom decided to ask one more time. “Harry is there something bothering 
you?”
Harry turned back towards Tom on his way to the door.  “Something isn’t 
quite right.”  He then walked away and left the mess hall.  Tom looked 
down at his plate and decided that Harry was correct, something wasn’t 
quite right.
“Oh, there goes the boss, T’jour.  Go away and do that computer thing that 
you do, I have to get back to engineering and my beloved chief.”  Connie 
said to T’jour as she stood up and began to take everyone’s trays.
“Is she still working, I thought she was due any day.”  Cam said as Connie 
picked up his tray to put with the others.
“Oh yeah, the doctor has put her on maternity leave.  That doesn’t stop her 
from being a guest in engineering.”  Connie picked up Anya’s tray.
“Hey, I was still eating!”  Anya said a slight level of anger in her voice that 
didn’t suit her.
“Woah, calm down you have to get to Holodeck 1 anyway – security field 
training remember?”  Connie sighed, sometimes she felt that she had to 
mother all her younger friends. 
All the friends stood up and began to file out of the room.  Anya caught 
Paspel by the arm and whispered into his ear, “Ensign Kim can’t be that bad 
to work for, can he?”
“Oh believe me,” Paspel whispered back.  “He can.”
*************************************************************
**************

USS Voyager – 2403, 2.34pm
“What’s happening?”  Captain Naomi Wildman asked, the view screen was 
telling her nothing.
“Structural integrity is being compromised, 79% and falling.  Shields have 
just failed.”  The nameless Ensign said from behind her.
“Send out a distress signal!”  The captain barked.
“Who’ll be able to pick it up, we’re travelling between time.”  This 
nameless ensign obviously had a few unresolved issues.
“That’s an order!”
“Aye, captain.  Signal is being sent.  Structural integrity at 34%”
“Defence capabilities?”  The captain inquired.
“Against what?”  Petulant was the word Naomi would use for this particular 
member of her crew.
“Do I have to repeat myself?  The phrase is, if looks could kill...
“1 photon torpedo, all phaser banks are off line.  Environmental controls are 
gone, life support will be next, structural integrity at 28%”
“When will we be at our destination?”
“There’s no way of knowing, we don’t even know if we’ll be back at the 
right time, what’s the difference between two years and twenty years to the 
galaxy?  14%”  The ensign was angry, they’d survived all manner of things 
to be where they were now and she was just throwing it all away.
“There she is.” said Naomi as Voyager came into view.
“The question is, when is she?”  The ensign didn’t turn to see the explosion 
in time, the last thing he felt was the immense heat as it surged toward him.


USS Voyager – 2377 - 1.45pm

The alpha bridge crew had all settled in 10 minutes later and everyone went 
about his or her usual business with ease.  It was a very normal, but very 
satisfying early part to everyone’s shift.  Even Tom took comfort from 
flying in straight lines, he didn’t want to have to think about anything but 
what he would say to B’elanna when he got home that evening.  He didn’t 
really want to say anything but the longer he left it the harder it would get.  
“Captain, we are receiving a distress call, audio only, lot’s of static.  It 
seems to be coming from a ship about 60,000 km off the port bow.  I don’t 
understand why I didn’t pick it up on long range sensors.  It just suddenly 
appeared.”  A truly puzzled look swept over Harry Kim’s face.
“On screen,” Janeway said without a hint of worry in her voice
Suddenly the picture of a drifting ship appeared on the view screen.  The 
bridge crew gasped as they realised what they were watching.  A ship that 
looked almost exactly like Voyager was sitting there on the view screen.  
All of them blinked and made sure that they weren’t seeing things by 
sending knowing glances to the other members of the crew.
It took Janeway some time to get her command out.  “Life signs?” she 
asked hoping ever so slightly that the answer would be in the negative.
“5 captain, the structural integrity of the ship won’t hold up much longer, I 
suggest we beam them aboard.”
“Do it,” Janeway said not daring to think about the consequences of her 
actions.  She didn’t even want to think about who the crew of this 
‘different’ Voyager were.  As soon as the words had left her mouth the ship 
on the view screen exploded.  It was an unnerving sight  
for the bridge crew as they saw the golden particles float across space.  The 
only things that remained of Voyager, even if it wasn’t their Voyager.
“Do we have them, Mr Kim?”  Janeway asked, worry now easy to pick out 
in her voice.
“Yes, I beamed them straight into sick bay Captain.  2 of them were badly 
injured.”
“Good work, Mr Kim.  Chakotay you have the bridge, Tuvok you’re with 
me.”  Janeway walked out of the bridge trying to look confident and in 
control for her crew.  As soon as she’d reached the haven of the enclosed 
turbolift she sighed, even though Tuvok was with her it was pointless to try 
and hide her emotions from him.  It amazed Janeway that the person she felt 
most comfortable to be emotional with was the most unemotional person on 
the ship.


1.59pm 
Janeway and Tuvok had arrived to find only 4 members of the crew alive.  
The fifth had died shortly after transport.  The alien body of the man lay on 
a biobed a blue tinge to his dark purple skin.  Janeway had never seen an 
alien race like that before yet the man wore a starfleet uniform and his turtle 
neck had two pips on it, marking the rank of Lieutenant.  Of the other four 
only one was instantly recognisable.  The woman that Janeway knew as 
Seven of Nine stood imposingly in the middle of the sick bay.  Janeway also 
knew without even having to look at her very carefully that this was not her 
Seven of Nine.  For a start she wore a starfleet uniform, red for command 
and three pips sat smartly on her turtleneck.   On a near by biobed lay a 
young man, his nose picked him out to be Bajoran but she couldn’t 
remember ever laying eyes on him before.  Next to him, lay someone who 
looked more familiar, Ktarian ridges danced up her forehead, and Janeway 
noted that this woman wore four pips on her turtleneck.  Janeway knew who 
this woman was.  The fifth member of the team looked incredibly familiar 
but at the same time totally foreign to Janeway.  She wore a medical 
uniform and was helping Janeway’s own EMH with the Bajoran that lay on 
the bed.  She had light brown hair and sparkling blue eyes but her forehead 
showed the slight bumps of ridges, definite Klingon ridges.
“He’s stable, but I only performed some brain stem surgery about two days 
ago.  He was with me in Sick bay when we were beamed out, I’m worried 
that the trauma he’s had to endure will undo a lot of the work I’ve done to 
his spine.”  The woman said as she continued to explain in medical terms 
that the Captain didn’t really understand fully what was wrong with the 
man.  It was only the ‘new’ Seven that noticed Janeway and Tuvok enter the 
room.  The woman then stepped back from Janeway almost in fear.  
“Doctor,” she called behind her.  The woman looked up from her work and 
locked eyes with the captain.
“Hello Captain, Commander Tuvok.”  The woman hesitated unsure of what 
to say next.  She was talking to people that she felt as though she knew but 
hadn’t even given thought to in the last 10 years.  She was talking to people 
from her past, she was definitely not prepared for this.  This morning her 
only thoughts had been escape, now they were a mess and Kathryn hated 
not being able to think clearly.
“This is going to get a bit of getting used to isn’t it?  I’m sorry for dropping 
in on you like this but prototype technology has a habit of doing this.”  
Prototype technology, well, it was nearly true, Kathryn mused.  She then 
smiled a crooked smile that Janeway knew all to well.  “The man over there 
is a member of a race of people called the Aisha.  It’s difficult to pronounce 
and doesn’t really have a starfleet translation that they like, you won’t meet 
their race for at least another 12 years.  My friend lying on the bed here is 
one Mr Steven T’jour, our security officer.  Next to him is Naomi Wildman, 
I had to sedate her but she’ll be fine.  Erm, I think you’ll probably know 
Commander Hansen over there and I’m ship’s physician Kathryn Paris.  I 
think that you are acquainted with both mine and Steven’s parents, and of 
course Naomi and Annika.”
The woman that Miss Paris had introduced as Commander Hansen had been 
unusually quiet for the highest-ranking conscious officer of the little group.
“I know how much you dislike temporal anomalies Captain.  I am sorry that 
we are not helping matters.”  Kathryn Paris said from across the room.
Commander Hansen ran towards Janeway and Tuvok and embraced them 
each in turn a very ‘un’ seven look of absolute joy plastered about her face.  
If it was not for the borg paraphernalia that was still on her face and her 
hands she would not look like Seven at all.
“Oh Captain, Commander Tuvok it is so good to be able to see you again!”   
The woman said excitedly, Janeway stepped back and saw tears flowing 
down her face.
“Harry,” she said even more excitedly than before if that was possible.  
“Kate, Harry will be here.  I’ve got to go find him.”
“Annika, you are ignoring Janeway’s 1st law of temporal phenomenon, keep 
your mouth shut at all times.”  Kathryn smiled at Annika, turned to the 
doctor handed him a hypo spray. Kathryn walked towards the captain.  She 
then reached over to the padd that sat on the doctor’s table and picked it up.  
She smiled “Looks like I arrived just in time, I might be able to remember 
being born this time.”
The doctor had remained silent throughout.  This woman was obviously a 
very skilled doctor but what did her Voyager need with two doctors?  It then 
occurred to him that maybe something had happened to him on the other 
Voyager.  He would have to ask Dr Paris later.
“So, Captain what are you going to do with us?  What’s going to happen 
when I meet Mum and Dad and Annika meets Seven.  I know it’d be better 
if we were kept away from the rest of the crew but we’re going to need to 
work on a shuttle if we are ever going to return to our time and we’ll 
probably need help from all three to achieve it.  Now I know why I never 
wanted to be Captain.”  Kathryn had breathed out deeply when she had 
mentioned her parents.  She almost didn’t want to mention them at all, 
looking at the stardate on the padd though it didn’t look as though she had 
much time to work with them before Voyager would be so badly beaten up 
they wouldn’t be able to help.  
The Captain suddenly realised that she had said nothing as the young doctor 
had calmly told her of their predicament.  Janeway did not feel threatened at 
all though, which was rare, she didn’t like being ordered about normally.  
Kathryn seemed totally in control of the situation almost as though in the 
back of her mind she had expected something like this to go wrong.  
Janeway also thought it quite amusing that the daughter of her field medic 
pilot and headstrong engineer would turn out to be a doctor.  Neither of 
them had ever particularly liked medicine or even sickbay that much.  It 
also occurred to Janeway that maybe Tom and B’elanna didn’t have that big 
a part in the raising of their daughter.  You could see the pain in her eyes 
every time she mentioned them.    
“I’ll assign you both quarters that you can stay in for the time being and I’m 
sure we could spare a shuttle now that we have the delta flyer.”
“Ah the delta flyer,” Kathryn said with recognition.  “Well that would be 
great captain.  Thank you, I know this must be hard for you to accept.”  
Kathryn smiled at Janeway and Janeway felt she had to smile back.  It had 
not once crossed Janeway’s mind that this was some kind of elaborate 
rouse, Kathryn and Annika seemed too real.
“I’m sorry about my actions upon your arrival Captain, Commander Tuvok.  
It’s just well...I don’t know really.  Anyway, I am interested in what you are 
going to tell the crew.”  Commander Hansen asked, her composure now 
returned.
“I haven’t quite decided yet Seven, I mean Commander Hansen.  It will 
certainly be the most bizarre ship-wide communication that I have ever 
made.”  Janeway’s smile faded as she realised what these people meant.  
Voyager had never got home.  Kathryn looked about 26, which meant that 
in that time from now Voyager would still be lost in the Delta quadrant.  A 
feeling of queasiness entered Janeway’s stomach.  She wondered if Kathryn 
had ever met another Klingon, or part Klingon.  She wondered what had 
happened with the borg and species 8472, she wondered what had become 
of the alpha quadrant in the wake of the dominion war.  She wondered if 
their time even barely resembled hers.
*************************************************************
**************
7.32pm
“This is Captain Janeway speaking.  I am in no doubt that the story about 
the destruction of the so-called ‘other’ Voyager has reached all of your ears 
by now.   Four of the five we beamed aboard are still alive but one is 
critically injured.  We will be doing all that we can to help them prepare a 
shuttle so that they can return home.  Your department head will give you 
more details concerning any help you will need to offer them. That’s all, 
Janeway out.”
“I’m impressed,” said Chakotay from across the room.  “Not one mention of 
temporal anomalies or polluted time lines.  When do Tom and B’elanna get 
here?  Oh yes and what about Seven, how is she going to react to herself.  
Who were the other two?  No, it’s all right I remember now.  Pederson and 
T’jour.  Never figured them as parents.  And Naomi Wildman that is 
definitely a bit of a shock, I can’t really see her all grown up.”
“I think I should have said more.  People should know who these people 
are.  I wanted their parents to know first though Chakotay, I thought it only 
fair.”  Janeway sighed and stared out her windows at the stars that flew by, 
she had her ready room darkened so that she could see them clearly.  
Chakotay had come to ask her about what would be happening tomorrow in 
light of their additional crew.  He had ended up staying and talking with the 
Captain about his experience with temporal anomalies, he knew though that 
he had never had to deal with anything like this.
“I saw Tom and B’elanna’s daughter on my way here.  It sure is strange 
how she looks so much like the two of them.  Is she like them?”
“No, that’s why I’m going to ask her to tell me exactly what has happened 
in her time-line.  I keep picking up on the little things she says and I begin 
to assume things.  She’s not at all like B’elanna or Tom.  She’s quieter, only 
talks when she needs to, very sensible, never talks out of turn, she reminds 
me of myself.  Almost completely different to them, which is worrying.”
Chakotay shook his head.  “You can’t ask her anything like that.  She’s 
from 26 years in the future, I mean we’re probably both long gone by then.  
I definitely don’t want to know anything of that nature about my future.  It’s 
hard enough that they are stuck here.”  Chakotay said coming behind 
Janeway and resting his hand on her shoulder.
“Do you think they named her after me?” Janeway asked expectantly.
“Almost definitely,” Chakotay said smiling and giving Janeway’s shoulder 
a gentle squeeze.
*************************************************************
**************

7.45 pm
“Hey, Captain you’re going to laugh when I tell you where we are.  Laugh 
or cry that is.”  Kathryn Paris laughed to herself as Naomi Wildman pulled 
herself up and looked around.
“Oh, no.  How far back are we?”  Naomi put her hands through her hair and 
began to brush down her uniform, she swang her legs round and sat, 
perched on the edge of the biobed.
“26 years.  Well you said we needed a holiday, and a change is as good as a 
rest.”  Kathryn smiled again as she ran the tricorder over her superior.
“Spare me the bed side manner, doctor.  Hmm, well what’s happening now, 
I assume Janeway’s been down here, how was she?”  Naomi carefully 
slipped back into ‘captain’ mode.
“Janeway and Tuvok came to see us all, a meet and greet session has been 
scheduled for 2100 hours, which should be lots of fun.  Your other self, this 
ship’s Naomi Wildman won’t be there though, it was thought that she 
would be too confused by the whole thing.  I didn’t get off so lightly, my 
parents will be in attendance.”  Kathryn picked up a padd and began to 
scroll down.  “Steve’s spine surgery will go ahead as planned tomorrow, 
look I’ve got the whole itinerary here.”  Kathryn gave the padd to Naomi.
“What have you told them?”  Naomi asked as she stared at the padd.  She 
was glad to see that they would be departing as soon as possible, Naomi felt 
incredibly uncomfortable here.
“Erm, nothing much really.  Annika’s having the hardest time keeping 
quiet. I’m having trouble with her condition, it’s hard for me to stabilise her 
neural pathways with this equipment, from the data I’ve got they still seem 
to be having a party up there, she’s not what I’d call emotionally stable right 
now.  But, I couldn’t keep her cooped up here with me moping around so I 
sent her to the shuttle bay, she’s helping.   She’ll be back for meet and greet 
though.  Permission to miss the meet and greet, Captain.”
Naomi had been so caught up in her own dilemma that she hadn’t even 
considered that of her friend.  It saddened her greatly that she had known 
Kathryn’s parents better than Kathryn.  She was glad Kathryn hadn’t told 
them that much, she was always one for the painfully truthful.  And their 
morbid history being what it was, painful is the right word.
“I think I’ll skip meet and greet but you’d better be there, you at least have 
to talk to Steven’s parents.  In fact that is an order, go to meet and greet, 
you’ll feel better confronting it than going back to your temporary quarters 
and moping as you put it.  Oh, have you got any pain killers?”  Naomi stood 
up and began to walk towards the door, limping slightly down her left side.
“Y’know I should be ordering you to stay in sick bay not smuggling you 
drugs.  Still, it’ll take me a while to whip up a batch that’ll do you some 
good, so, here catch.  Strongest stuff I could find, I swear.  If you have any 
problems at all don’t hesitate to contact me.  Blah, blah, blah you know the 
drill.”  Naomi had had trouble catching the hypospray as it had flown 
towards her.  “Erm, Captain where are you going?  We’ve been assigned 
quarters but they won’t be ready for another couple of hours yet, what are 
you going to do with yourself?”  Kathryn called after her captain as she 
turned her back on her.  Naomi thought about this for a moment, she was 
going to go back to her office, but it wasn’t her office here.
“I thought I’d go see what is happening down in the shuttle bay, that all 
right with you doctor?”  Naomi said, trying to make it sound like a joke and 
failing badly.
“Oh well, you are the captain.”  Kathryn’s tone matched that of her captain, 
it had been a long time since they’d agreed on anything.
*************************************************************
**************

8.50pm
“Well that was different.”  Tom said as he left the briefing room.  Anya 
Pederson and Paspel T’jour followed, B’elanna stepped out of the room 
slowly.  They all walked together along the corridor towards the turbolift, 
no one knowing quite what to say.
“Should we go to sickbay right now or should we wait for Seven?”  Anya 
asked desperately hoping that someone would make the decision for her.
“I think we should go to Sickbay, Annie.  He’s apparently quite ill.”  Paspel 
said his words quietly but the emotion in his voice was evident.
B’elanna still couldn’t think of anything to say.  It was too strange that she 
was going to meet her child all grown up.  It would have helped at this time 
if she and Tom were on speaking terms.  As it was she would have to cope 
on her own, again.  B’elanna hoped her child wasn’t as screwed up as she 
expected.  She wondered how she ever thought it was worth bothering for 
this child, things hadn’t been right between Tom and herself for a long time 
now.  The only thing that kept them together was the memories of what they 
had before and the baby that B’elanna carried.  The doctor had informed her 
that she would probably give birth within the next week.  As all four stood 
in the corridor their query was answered as Seven strode out into the 
corridor.
“Shall we proceed to Sickbay?”  Seven asked.
“Let’s get this over with.” Tom said.  The other members of Tom’s party 
were so caught up in their own thoughts they barely heard what he said as 
they stepped into the turbolift.
*************************************************************
************** 
 
9.11pm
“He fell, he was on a planet taking a training session for erm... some new 
members of the crew.  Anyway he broke his neck but I was able to repair 
basic motor functions and he was doing well until we were... here.”  
Kathryn explained what had happened to her friend, turning alien prison 
world to training session and also leaving out the conditions in which she 
carried out the surgery – during a red alert.  She had noticed her parents 
arrive and they were standing in the background talking with the EMH.
“You’ll be glad to know she is a quite outstanding doctor.  She showed me 
some of the methods she has developed and they are nothing but 
revolutionary.”  The doctor was sincere in his praise even though he failed 
to disclose that their daughter’s speciality was righting genetically modified 
people and combating severe radiation sickness.  From the procedures she 
had described she had had a lot of practice.
“Doctor Paris is a very special young lady and she is a vital member of our 
crew.”  Commander Hansen added as she stood next to B’elanna.  She 
found it incredibly strange to be meeting herself from 26 years ago.  She 
was desperate to tell her counterpart of all that had happened but she knew 
she couldn’t.  She looked at Kate’s parents, a few days ago she could barely 
remember their faces but now everything about them came flooding back.  
Tom Paris and B’elanna Torres had never really been that close to her when 
she had known them.  She did remember though, that for a short time at 
least they gave their daughter all the love and attention a child could ever 
want, even if it was a very short time.
“I have more surgery planned for tomorrow and if all goes to plan he will be 
conscious in about two days.”  Kathryn looked at Anya and T’jour.  Steven 
had told her many times that his parents were never in love, just in like with 
each other.  They’d got together to have children more than anything else, 
they felt that by staying single they were letting the ship down.  Kathryn 
watched them as they talked to her. She looked into Steven’s parents’ eyes, 
he was right, they were never in love but at least they didn’t have that love 
clouding their vision.  Kathryn had seen what love had done to her father.  
Maybe Steven’s parents had got it the right way round.
“What are his chances of survival, doctor?”
“Very good, like I said if the surgery is successful then he’ll be up and 
around in a week maximum.  He’s a fighter.”  Kathryn put a hand on his 
shoulder as she said this.  Trying and failing to make it look like a friendly 
gesture, she knew what he meant to her.  
Paspel noticed this and smiled inwardly trying to keep his expression as 
emotionless as possible.
“Tell me about my son, Doctor.”  Anya asked, tears forming in her eyes as 
the enormity of the situation hit her.  She could tell by the look on the 
doctor’s face that she was holding back on some information.
“Well, what do I say?  He is one of my closest friends and a great asset to 
the crew.  He grows up into a fine young man, you both did very well.”  She 
felt like giving them examples of his bravery or telling a funny story about 
when he got caught by Captain Wildman messing with her holodeck 
programme.  She couldn’t say anything though, she didn’t know how it 
would affect things.
Paspel gave Anya a reassuring hug.  He saw the confusion in her eyes. Here 
she was 27 years old and watching her grown up son breathing slowly on 
the biobed.  That was the one advantage of serving on a starship, you never 
knew what was going to happen next.
Tom Paris only half listened to the Doctor as he talked about his daughter.  
Instead he watched her talking to Anya and Paspel.  He saw her put her 
hand on the young boy’s shoulder.  He saw the concern in her eyes as she 
delivered her news to her friend’s parents.  The Doc was right, his daughter 
was very good at her job.  He still had no idea what he was going to say to 
her when they met.  
Kathryn finished talking with Anya and Paspel and began to walk towards 
where her parents were standing.  She hadn’t a clue what she was going to 
say to them.
“Well,” Kathryn said as she stood next to the doctor.  “I’ve briefed 
Lieutenant T’jour’s parents as to exactly what will be happening tomorrow.  
It will be a pleasure operating with you doctor.  I’m sure we have a lot to 
learn from one another.”  That was a cowardly thing to do but she was 
going to let her parents say hello to her and not vice versa.
Tom and B’elanna shared a look that coursed with concern.  “Kathryn, 
come here” B’elanna said as the girl moved away, catching her on the arm.
Kathryn paused, span on her heel and stared into her mother’s eyes. “Well 
to be perfectly honest with you,” Kathryn said as she moved towards her 
parents. “ I’ve been trying to avoid you.  It’s because I have no idea what to 
say to you, to either of you.  You might think this is strange for you, I assure 
you it is even stranger for me.  But anyway, now I’m here and well, ” She 
smiled a half smile and waited to hear her mother’s voice for the first time.
“Strange, is definitely the right word.”  Her mother was prettier in real life 
than any of the photos she’d seen.  A definite frown distorted her lips.  
Kathryn reached forward and hugged her mother; maybe there was 
something to be said for temporal anomalies after all.  It was only the 
second time in her life that she’d felt like crying, she couldn’t bring herself 
to though, what was the point?
“You must think I’m being stupid.  It’s just that...” What Kathryn thought.  
It’s just that I never met you and you’ve been dead almost 26 years and it’s 
all my fault.  Scratch what she had said about the good side of temporal 
anomalies, there isn’t one.  She looked towards her father when she had 
stopped hugging her mother.  This one was going to be harder.  She at least 
had known her father before he had died.  She still blamed him for taking 
that mission and leaving her with no one for company but an ex-borg, a shy 
communications officer, a lonely Vulcan and a holographic doctor.  It was 
not what anyone would call an ‘ideal’ upbringing.  Still, seeing her father 
again made all the feelings of anger and resentment she had towards him 
vanish.  She had after all not seen him for nearly 20 years.  She embraced 
him so tightly it almost took him by surprise.  She just felt, in a juvenile sort 
of way that she had to make sure this wasn’t a dream, she had to make sure 
he was real.
Seven and Commander Hansen watched this emotional reunion standing 
side by side.  So similar yet so very different.  Seven of course found the 
reunion ‘an interesting display of Human affection’ Commander Hansen 
found it ‘heart warming’.
“Would you consider yourself one of Doctor Paris’s closest friends?”  
Seven asked.
“I practically brought her up after her father died.”  As soon as she’d said it, 
she had regretted it.  
Fortunately Seven seemed to ignore the comment.  “Does it become easier 
for me to have ‘relationships’ with other crew members?  Do I ever...” 
Commander Hansen cut her off mid-sentence.
“What do I tell you.  You’re me, me from a long time past but me all the 
same.  I can’t tell you anything about what the future holds for you, or how 
to deal with everything that will happen.  All I can say is, you’ll be okay, 
things will work out fine.”  Commander Hansen smiled at herself and Seven 
tried to copy the smile.  She copied it very precisely and one day hoped to 
have the happiness in her eyes to match it.  Seven stole a look at the 
commander’s face, she was mistaken, this doppelganger had no happiness 
in her eyes, only a look of regret as her eyes darted from Ensign Paris to the 
doctor to the young security officer stood over the young man in the far 
corner.  Seven was not one for speculation but it seemed that things did not 
bode well.
“I’d like it if you could come for dinner at our quarters, tomorrow maybe 
after your friend’s surgery.” Tom asked as he hugged his daughter.
“That would be great!  I should finish at about 1800 hours.  I’ll meet you at 
your quarters at about 2000 hours.  I won’t have time to replicate any new 
clothes, you’ll have to put up with me in my uniform.”  Kathryn stepped 
back, her over zealous response designed to hide the swell of negative 
emotion she was feeling.  This wasn’t the time to get angry, this was a time 
for calm reflection, if indeed Kathryn believed she was capable of calm 
reflection.  The urge to knock him out for what he had done to her would 
not keep in check for long, sometimes those Klingon genes resurged with a 
vengeance, this was one of those times.  “Please excuse me, I have a few 
things to talk over with the doctor.  It’s late, go back to your quarters, get 
some sleep.  I’ll be there at 2000 hours tomorrow on the dot.”  Kathryn 
pushed her parents out of the sick bay quickly.  She could feel the hate 
bubbling up inside her and knew that she didn’t want it exploding right 
there and then in the sick bay.
“Doctor, I’m ready to go over procedure now.  Let’s call up a holographic 
simulation and I’ll show you what I’m going to do.  Somebody very wise 
once told me that you can’t be too prepared.”  Kathryn shot a look at 
Annika who smiled at the compliment.
“So come on Seven, let’s leave my protege to her work.  I want you to tell 
me all about what you think of these irrational crewmembers.”  Seven and 
Commander Hansen left the sick bay, Seven had a slightly confused look on 
her face.  As if she was thinking ‘what have I become?’
October 23rd 2377 – 2.42pm

“Anya, It’ll be all right.  I mean I haven’t known Dr Paris for very long but 
she knows Steven and I am sure she will do everything she can for him.”  
Paspel said as he watched the EMH and Tom and B’elanna’s daughter work 
carefully on the son he hadn’t known existed.
“This is, I don’t know, unexpected?  I never really thought that we would 
have a child.  At the same time though I can’t think of anyone else I’d rather 
have as the father of my child.  I wonder how we got together?”  Anya 
smiled weakly at a man who two days ago was her closest friend in the 
universe, today that man would be her future husband.  
“Interesting question, I’m sure I wooed you with romantic Bajoran love 
poetry and created beautiful holodeck programs for us both to enjoy.”  
	Paspel couldn’t imagine anything like that. It was more than likely 
that they just thought it a good idea.
“Well, now you’ll have lots of time to think about it won’t you?”  Anya 
turned to face Paspel, he lifted her head towards his and their lips touched, 
barely at first but then it turned into a deep kiss.  
“I have a question.”  Paspel said as they broke their embrace.
“Fire away,” Anya said as she stepped back.
“That didn’t feel right, did it?”  Paspel was unsure whether he should have 
said it.  He didn’t have a massive ego or anything but he didn’t know 
whether he was treading over some of Anya’s feelings.  To his relief she 
laughed at this comment.
“No, It’s a shame though, you’re a damn good kisser.”  Paspel couldn’t help 
but laugh at this.  For a moment they forgot where they were, they were 
back to being old friends, maybe even the best of friends, not watching their 
son having life threatening surgery.
“Do you think that she is in love with him?”  Anya said as she watched Dr 
Paris.
“Funny, I was going to ask you the same question.  So, what do you think?”
“I don’t know, I’d like to think that she is although I can’t quite tell.  She’s 
not what I’d call an open book.”  Anya hoped Paspel understood her Terran 
expression.
“No, so unlike her parents.”
“Not really, I don’t think we know as much about them as we think.”
“I guess all three have issues that they keep bottled up.  She just seems so 
quiet, reserved, maybe I don’t know her well enough.”
“What we definitely don’t know is her past.  Yesterday when she was 
talking to us about his condition, I sensed she was holding something back, 
not telling us the whole truth.  I don’t believe he broke his neck on a 
training mission, they would have taken precautions against things like 
that.”  Paspel listened to Anya very carefully.  This is what he wanted with 
her, friendship.  He never wanted their emotions to get in the way of them, 
he wanted to be able to talk to her like this for the rest of his life, maybe 
that’s why he decided to marry her. 
“Should we ask her?  I’m sure with some coaxing she’d tell us what really 
happened.”  Anya asked him as she leaned against a nearby bulkhead.
“To be honest with you, I don’t want to know.  Dr Paris and Seven seem 
affected somehow, as though the time they lived through was very painful.  
I know for a fact that the Voyager they were on was headed into the delta 
quadrant, not away from it.  I also know from our sensor logs and a brief 
conversation I had with Ensign Kim this morning is that there were only 47 
bodies aboard Voyager, excluding the 5 we beamed aboard.  That is almost 
a skeleton crew even for a ship as small as this.”
“What do you think they were running from?”
“Like I said, I don’t want to think about it.”  Anya leaned into Paspel and he 
gave her a protective hug.  She felt that even though she didn’t love him,  
she could definitely marry him and be happy.    They stood together for a 
long time, and felt comfortable just being together.  Maybe they were 
warming to the idea of being married or maybe they just needed to hold 
each other close.  Either way as they watched the operation they both felt 
better that the other was there and both believed that on a platonic level at 
least they were deeply in love.  As they left the observation room when the 
operation ended, hand in hand, Anya secretly hoped that Paspel would give 
her a good night kiss.  He did not disappoint.
*************************************************************
*************

6.13pm 
“Thanks Doc, you were great help.  I don’t know if I could have done it 
without you.”  Kathryn smiled at the doctor as she cleaned her hands.
“On the contrary Doctor Paris you barely needed my assistance, you did a 
masterful job, well done.”  The doctor sat down in his seat in the office and 
picked up a medical tricorder.
“If you will permit me, I’d just like to give you the once over for the official 
record.”
Kathryn tried to hide her anxiety at being looked at.  She was unsure if the 
doctor had put two and two together yet.  He ran the instrument over her, 
looked quizzically at the results and ran another scan.
“Hmm, yes very healthy for someone who has spent a long amount of time 
at a prison camp.”  The doctor said, holding Kathryn’s gaze.
“Ah, so you’ve discovered our little secret.  I commend you doctor it would 
have taken me longer to work it out.  I thought I’d hidden our implants 
successfully.  Tell me, how did you do it?”
“Simple observation Doctor Paris.  The implant just under your hairline was 
clearly visible when you pulled your hair up.  How did it happen?”
“Let’s just say that the Alpha quadrant you left is very different to the one 
we returned to.  I can’t tell you anymore than that.  Anyway, we escaped to 
cut a long story short and those of us who were left decided to go ‘home’ at 
least for us anyway.  So we set off towards the delta quadrant, hoping to 
find an untouched world that we could settle on and call home.  Lieutenant 
T’jour’s implant broke his neck as he climbed aboard the shuttle I had 
stolen; we lost many good people that way.  The man who died yesterday 
was not a member of the ‘Aisha’ I made that up.  He was a betazoid, his 
DNA had been tampered with.  Now you know why it is my life’s work.”  
Kathryn now felt free to scratch at her implant.
“Why didn’t you tell the Captain?”
“Oh yeah that would really help wouldn’t it?  Hi Captain we’re from the 
future and it’s like hell so don’t go to earth turn around.  Yeah, I’m sure 
she’d love it if I just blurted that out as soon as I came aboard.  I’m only 
telling you because you deserve to know from a medical aspect.  Otherwise 
I would have broken your holographic neck personally.  No one is to know 
of this, no one at all.  Do you understand?”  The doctor was shocked by the 
young woman’s outburst of anger.  Gone were her sweet smiles and 
interesting comment, the person that faced him now was a woman who had 
been on the verge and never really come back.  
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have snapped.  It brought back some bad memories, 
that’s all.  I’ve got to go Mum and Dad are expecting me for dinner.  God, 
that sounds weird.  Bye Doc and thank you.”  As she left the room the old 
Kathryn Paris reappeared as suddenly as she had vanished.  The doctor 
mused that he could write three or four volumes on the neuroses of this girl.  
Whether he wanted to was another matter.


7.56pm
“Tom, light the candles on the table.”  B’elanna shouted as she pulled on the 
clothes that she had set aside for the evening on in her bedroom.  They were 
nothing special, a white shirt and a blue pair of trousers, nothing too formal.  
After all this was a family dinner.
Tom did as he was told and surveyed his new surroundings.  They had 
moved quarters just that morning.  B’elanna’s bedroom on the left, Tom’s 
on the right and the baby’s in the middle, more towards B’elanna’s than 
Tom’s.  Tom felt uneasy, there was still a lot unsaid between him and 
B’elanna that needed to be said.  They’d both said things two nights ago 
that were spiteful and that they didn’t mean, or at least Tom didn’t mean.  It 
would be very hard to take those things back.  He just wanted some more 
honesty in his life, honesty that he wasn’t going to get that night.  All night 
he was going to have to listen to Kathryn conceal facts about her life as she 
tried to explain herself to them.  It was going to be a hard night for all of 
them, Tom wondered why he’d suggested it.  Tom sat back in his chair.
B’elanna sat down heavily on her bed and sighed.  Her ankles hurt so badly 
she could barely walk.  She was also nervous about how tonight would go.  
She wanted to talk to Tom.  She wanted to tell him that she hadn’t meant it.  
The problem was the more she thought about it, the more she realised the 
only way that they could live together, would be apart.
She heard Tom shout ‘come in’ from the living room and stood up.  She 
waddled in and saw her daughter standing there, looking quite perturbed.  
She gestured that they all sit down and they all did.  No one knew what to 
say for the next couple of minutes.
*************************************************************
**************
9.23pm
“Mr Kim, you said you wanted to see me sir.  Can I come in?”  T’jour stood 
outside Harry Kim’s quarters.  He was so nervous that he couldn’t stand 
still, a bad sign.
“Come,” came a voice from inside as the doors opened.
Harry Kim sat on his sofa, padds were stacked on his coffee table along 
with four empty mugs.  Paspel walked in apprehensively, it was very rarely 
that Kim even talked to him, let alone invited him into his quarters.
“Here’s some stuff I’ll need doing tomorrow,” Harry handed Paspel the 
padd that was on the top of his pile.
“Oh, is that all?”  T’jour asked finding the whole situation a little surreal.  
Never before had he stepped foot in Harry Kim’s quarters or even been 
acknowledged by him in the mess hall. And now here he was standing in his 
quarters.
“No, I wanted to ask you how your son is doing.”  Harry Kim said.  He 
hadn’t yet looked his visitor in the eye.
“He should be fine, Sir.”  Paspel didn’t want to say anymore.  It annoyed 
him that his commanding officer was prying into his affairs.
“Very good T’jour, you’re dismissed.”  Harry Kim looked up and then did 
something that he never thought he would ever do to T’jour, he smiled.  
Tom had told him about what had happened in the sick bay yesterday and it 
had got Harry thinking.  If things weren’t right it was always better to set 
them straight in the shortest amount of time as possible.  Harry was sick of 
getting stressed and having hang-ups with every other member of the crew.  
Harry Kim was sick of being cynical and introverted, the one thing he had 
learned from this ‘new’ Seven was that life was far too short for petty 
arguments.  Even if T’jour annoyed him to the point of distraction he should 
at least be civil.
T’jour left, very confused.  Was this the same Harry Kim who wouldn’t let 
him speak without permission?  Who got annoyed every time he came up 
with an idea or questioned his judgement?  T’jour though found that he 
would prefer it if his relationship with Ensign Kim returned to professional. 
Recently it had become personal, the odd harsh glance, sniping comments 
made behind the other’s back.  It was at least one less thing to worry about.  
Paspel smiled, for a supposedly secure person he was definitely getting 
confused more and more lately.
*************************************************************
**************
10.42pm
“Well, that was lovely.  It’s a while since I’ve had tomato soup.”  Kathryn 
picked up he serviette and wiped the corners of her mouth.
“Tom’s spent ages trying to get the replicater to make it properly.”  
B’elanna said.  The room fell silent again.
“So, why be a doctor?”  Tom asked smiling at the girl across the table 
warmly, a gesture she didn’t return.
“We needed one,” Kathryn looked down at her hands, not daring to look at 
her parents for fear of screaming at them.
“Oh, well.  Why don’t I go get main course.” Tom stood up and began to 
collect the bowls.  The atmosphere in the room was far from jovial, in fact it 
was practically luke warm.  Kathryn had sat awkwardly all night, looking at 
her hands and her cutlery more than her parents.  He’d tried to make her feel 
welcome, even cracked a few lame jokes that she hadn’t even smiled at.  
Tom worried about this girl, it didn’t escape his attention that she was 
nothing like him or indeed B’elanna.  There was a cool sadness in her blue 
eyes, dark black bags hung around them, the way she had angrily pulled 
back her hair made her face look almost harsh, her skin was a sickly pale 
colour.  She would have been a very beautiful young woman if she had been 
well, as it was, her perpetual sadness seemed to overwhelm her features.  
From the replicater he watched B’elanna talk to his daughter, she only 
nodded her replies to B’elanna’s questions.  It was going to be a long 
evening.
*************************************************************
**************
October 24th -  2377 6am

“Commander Hansen, if I might have a word with you in my office.”  
Janeway asked as she saw Commander Hansen standing stridently on the 
bridge next to Seven.
“Of course Captain, I’ll be right there,” Annika was surprised by this.  If she 
wanted her to get off the bridge she would comply but with Kate and Steven 
both in sick bay this morning, she would feel restless anywhere else.
When Annika entered the Captain’s office, she sat down, something 
Janeway was definitely not expecting.
“So, Commander how is our young doctor coping?”
“Admirably, Captain.”
Janeway was not prepared for such a ‘seven’ like response.  She had almost 
forgotten that they were the same person.  The same person but 26 years 
difference.  
“How is the work going on the shuttle Commander?”  Janeway asked.
“If everything goes to plan you’ll never know that we were even here.”  The 
commander should have accompanied that statement with a smile, she 
didn’t.
“Is there something troubling you, Commander?”  Janeway refused to call 
her Annika.  It would mean confronting too many weird time repercussions 
that she didn’t want to think about.
“Nothing, Captain.  Believe me, we will be out of your hands in no time at 
all.”  Commander Hansen didn’t even lock eyes with the captain this time.
“Well thank you, Commander.  I’ll want to be kept posted on any updates.”
“Captain,” the commander asked, sounding almost childlike with the 
amount of uncertainty in her voice.  “What is the star-date?”
“Oh, I think it is ******.”  Janeway was puzzled by this request.  She’d 
expected something more revealing, something that would let her in.  
Janeway had met two very different versions of this woman yet both were 
as elusive with the truth.  Janeway did not want to push it, this woman was 
not a member of her crew.  It felt almost refreshing to be talking to someone 
who wasn’t a member of ‘her’ crew.
“Well, Captain it has been nice to see you again.  You are exactly as I 
remembered you would be.”
“Commander?”  Janeway asked, an eyebrow raised.
“Time’s a funny thing Captain.  A very funny thing indeed.”  With that 
Commander Hansen turned around and left Janeway’s office.  Even 
Janeway’s scientific mind could not shift the feeling of foreboding in her 
stomach.  That was too final even for Janeway.
*************************************************************
*************

6.34am
“Neelix!”  Kathryn exclaimed as she entered the mess hall.  He gave her a 
warm but slightly wary smile.  “You have exactly no idea who I am, and I 
love that.”  Kathryn threw her arms around the Talaxian.  He hugged her 
back, this was obviously a very confused ensign.  Maybe he ought to call 
the doctor.  Then he looked at her face, crisp blue eyes contrasting Klingon 
ridges.  She was one of those from that other ‘Voyager’.  Well, thought 
Neelix, at least I’ll still be around.
“Leola root, do you have any leola root?  It’s my absolute favourite, I would 
kill for some real food.”  The girl skurried off into the kitchen with the 
exuberance of a child half her age.
“Y’know,” she shouted from where she was rumaging.  “I find that the 
replicater just doesn’t match up.  Don’t you agree?”  She returned, Leola 
root in hand and placed it firmly on the table.  Neelix thought, this could not 
be Tom Paris’ daughter.
“Ooh, casserole or stew? I can’t make my mind up, you choose.”  She 
skipped off into the kitchen and stopped over an instrument that lay 
gleaming on a side table.  “I’ve got to show Steven this, I’m sure he’d love 
to see it in one piece.”  She returned to Neelix who had already begun to 
chop the vegetable.  “You see this.  Kes gave you this, your second 
anniversary, the lunar moon rise program.  You have told me that story so 
many times, Stevie broke this when he was 8 years old.  The way he goes 
on about it, you’d think the experience had scarred him for life.  I have 
never seen you so mad.  It was so funny.”  The gleaming object was put 
back in its place.
“I’m sorry, I just haven’t been able to get this excited for a while.  The 
strains of being the ship’s doctor and everything.”  She smiled warmly.  For 
a talkative person Neelix didn’t even consider the fact that he’d said nothing 
for the past few minutes.  It was enough to see this young girl skip about his 
galley with such nostalgia.  It was almost as though she hadn’t been there in 
a long while.  Neelix put that thought on pause.
“It’s raktajino, I swear that stuff is bad for me.  My Klingon DNA doesn’t 
reach as far as my weak lonely human stomach.  I mean it is raktajino that 
gets me so, so erm, excited.”  Kathryn smiled.  “What’s the time, Neelix?”
“Last time I checked it was about 0630 hours.”  Neelix said as he reached 
for some spice.
“Ah, good lots of time,” she said, almost cryptically.
“Hey, is that Naomi Wildman?  Over there with that blonde woman.”  
Kathryn smiled.  Neelix’s brow furrowed slightly, Kathryn’s vagueness 
over Sam worried him.
“Yeah, that is Sam, her mother.  Naomi’s not sleeping too well.”  Neelix 
said, worried that she would make another slip, he didn’t want that burden 
of knowledge.
“Well, I better go say hello to the captain.”  Neelix gasped and caught 
Kathryn’s arm, he stared at her open mouthed.  “Well, you always said she 
would be Neelix.”  Kathryn left Neelix’s side and went over to Naomi.
*************************************************************
**************

8.32am
“Hey B’elanna, wake up.  It’s 0830 hours, you’ve got a check up with the 
doctor in an hour.”  As much as B’elanna hated Tom’s continual fussing, it 
felt good to feel his breath on the side of her face.
“I hadn’t forgotten but thanks for reminding me anyway.”  B’elanna lifted 
herself up from where she had fallen asleep.  Seemed the sofa was more 
comfortable than she thought.  “What time did she leave?”  B’elanna called 
to Tom.
“Oh, about 2200 hours I think.  She said she had to go check on Steven 
before she turned in.”  Tom called back.  He was slightly surprised that they 
weren’t arguing by now.
“I don’t want to sound ungrateful but she’s not what I expected.”  B’elanna 
said, just loud enough to be audible to Tom.
“No, nor me.  I think it’s because we’re viewing her through our time.  It’s 
as though she’s out of context.  I don’t know, I just think her time is very 
different to ours.”  Tom said, he’d moved into the living room now and sat 
perched on the edge of the sofa.
“I got that impression.  I hope we weren’t bad parents.”  B’elanna had 
tapped perfectly into what Tom was feeling.  The cold girl with what could 
be described at best as ‘poor’ communication skills had filled him with 
dread at his part in her development.  The more and more he argued with 
B’elanna the more he worried about his child.  He didn’t want to bring her 
into a household where they argued every other night.
“Hey,” his light tone betrayed his mood.  “Like she said, in a few days we 
won’t even remember her being here.  All this anxiety will go away.”  Tom 
said soothingly, closer to B’elanna now, in more ways than one.
“No, it won’t,” B’elanna said, the hint of a tear in her eye.  It wasn’t really 
Kathryn, it was them.  They were the problem, they hadn’t been talking, 
properly for a very long time.  B’elanna silently cursed.  She should have 
used her head.  She loved Tom, more than she had ever loved anyone; that 
shouldn’t be a reason for them to be together though.  From their first kiss, 
she had known their relationship would always be a trail of messy emotions, 
past issues, broken promises and arguments.  She should have seen it then, 
not indulged herself in an ‘all we need is love’ kind of relationship.  They 
didn’t have anything else.  She loved him with all her heart but they were 
too alike, too obviously wrong to all around them, a mistake, a long 
beautiful, passionate mistake, on both their parts.  All she wanted to do 
now, was reach out to him, tell herself that they were meant to be, push her 
feelings of doubt and regret to the back of her mind.  She couldn’t do that, if 
this child was to have any chance at all, she had to be sensible about it.  
They had to resolve this, once and for all.  She was ready for that now, their 
relationship had started with blunt honesty and there it would end, it seemed 
right to B’elanna somehow.
“We need to talk, B’elanna.”  Tom looked at her sternly.
“Yeah, I think it’s time we finally say what we have been thinking.”  
B’elanna stared back at him.
“I know we’ve been having problems lately and they’re the kind of 
problems that don’t just go away easily.”  Tom swallowed hard, he’d 
expected, stupidly for it to be easier than this.  Every time he had gone over 
the words in his mind, he’d been the calm rational one, while B’elanna shot 
venom all over the place.  Instead he was at this sort of mutual 
understanding junction, they both knew what was coming.
“I love you B’elanna.  I just don’t think we’re doing this properly 
anymore.”  Tom had now moved very close to her.  B’elanna smiled at him 
weakly.
“I love you too,” she said as she raised her head to his.  He put his hand to 
her cheek and kissed her lightly on her lips, she lifted her hand behind his 
neck and they pulled closer together, the kiss turning deep and passionate.  
They held each other for a long time, neither wanting to let go.  “So this is it 
then?”  B’elanna asked, hoping he wouldn’t agree with her, praying he 
wouldn’t agree with her, knowing full well that his thoughts echoed hers.
“For the best, then?”  Tom said, very quietly.
“For the best,” B’elanna repeated, just as quietly, almost wishing that Tom 
couldn’t hear her.  They sat there quietly, neither wanting to finalise their 
words by moving away.  It was right though, it was the best thing for the 
both of them, for the baby.  Tomorrow, they’d both realise that they’d made 
the right decision.  Today, well today was different. 
*************************************************************
**************

8.50am
“Kate?”  Steven T’jour sat up and scratched his head.  Where was he?
“Morning, sleepy.”  Kathryn walked towards him.  “Look at what I have 
brought you, leola root casserole.”  Kathryn handed him a bowl of the food 
and picked up a medical tricorder near by.
“Huh?” Steven said arching his hand above his head.  “Where am I?  Is this 
the holodeck or something?”
“Nope,” Kathryn smiled as she ran the instrument over him.  “94% of nerve 
restructuring successful,” She allowed herself a self-satisfied smile.  “Pretty 
good, even if I do say so myself.”
“You’re avoiding the question.”  Steven smiled, he remembered getting into 
the shuttle, he remembered the pain in his back, he should have been more 
careful, he should have checked his port.
“Oh well, to put it bluntly we’re on Voyager.”  Kathryn wasn’t quite sure 
how to continue and she knew what his next question would be.
“This isn’t our Voyager.”  Steven said, sure of the statement but at the same 
time even more confused.  His eyes scanned over his surroundings.  This 
looked like the old sick bay, the sick bay before all of Kate’s genetics tools 
were added.   “You’re not running the old EMH programme are you?  You 
know that just depresses you, well I don’t know about you but it depresses 
the hell out of me.”
“Shut up, he might hear you.”  Kathryn said quickly looking around the 
room.
“Who?” Steven asked, now very confused.
“Basically, our routine time resurfacing mission sort of backfired and we 
ended up here.”
“Where’s here?”  Steven asked, things now beginning to slot into place.
“Voyager, 26 years ago.”  Kathryn said, worry in her eyes.
“What?”  Steven asked, the colour his face had regained was now gone.
“Well Annika’s working on it, we’ll be gone in about two or three days.”
“But 26 years ago?”  Steven asked.
“Yes, I think I explained that once didn’t I?  I should have checked that 
your single brain cell was working when I did the routine scan, it seems to 
be having a bit of a hard time.”  Kathryn began to laugh raucously as she 
tapped Steven’s head, he couldn’t help but join in.
“Been drinking Raktajino again, Paris? You know what it does to you.”  
Steven said with a commanding tone.  
“Hey,” said Kathryn.  “I met your parents, they looked so young!  I almost 
didn’t recognise your mum.  Paspel looks the same as ever though.  Has he 
always been that serious?”  Kathryn asked a mischievous glint still in her 
eye.
“What about your parents?”  Steven asked, making eye contact and looking 
solemn faced at his friend.
“They’re here...” Kathryn felt like screaming at Stevie, he knew she didn’t 
need this now.  At the same time, she felt like telling him everything, 
explaining about the other night, telling him about meeting her mum for the 
first time, she wanted to tell him everything but she couldn’t.  He needed to 
know about Cator and all that had happened, for such a young doctor, 
Kathryn had broken too much bad news to people.
“Stevie, I’ve got to tell you something...”
*************************************************************
**************
   
9.40am
“Parsons what are you doing here?”  B’elanna said staring at Connie 
Parsons.
“Holo- emitters, Chief. Lieutenant Carey said I should come and check 
them.”  Well he’d mentioned that they might need some maintenance and 
Connie had decided that a chance to see Anya and Paspel’s kid was too 
good to pass up.  “Check up?”
“Yep, but I can’t seem to find the doctor.”  B’elanna said quite coldly.  She 
wondered why Carey had sent Parson’s.  She hated anything to do with 
holo-emitters or holograms or holodecks, B’elanna had never asked why.
“Wow, he looks just like them.”  Connie said as she looked in Steven’s 
direction.  He was sleeping on his back, not as stiffly as before but he still 
looked pretty uncomfortable.
“You’re good friends with them aren’t you?  Pederson and T’jour I mean.”  
B’elanna wondered why she’d had such a problem with Parsons before.  
Sure, she spread a little gossip but she seemed okay.
“Yeah, my little ones.”  Connie stared distantly towards the boy lying on the 
bed.  Her youngest son would be 13 in two weeks, this time of year was 
always hard.
“Is it hard?  Being a parent I mean.”  Yes, there was definitely nothing 
wrong with Connie Parsons, she was a little giggly but she had been away 
from her children for 6 years, she was lonely.
“It’s strange.  I didn’t think that I would ever have children, I had an 
illustrious star-fleet career ahead of me, my dreams were within reach.  But 
the next thing I knew I was 22 and pregnant.  My whole life just changed 
overnight, I married my boyfriend more because my mother thought it 
would be a good idea than because I wanted to.  In the space of six years I’d 
had three.”  B’elanna listened intently as the woman almost poured her 
heart out.   “I think back now to how uncertain I was when I was pregnant, I 
didn’t think I’d be a good mother but it came naturally.  I was always there 
for them, to listen to them, to help them make the right decision and now I 
haven’t seen them for six years, when we get back I don’t know how I’ll 
react, they won’t be mine anymore.”  Although her voice wavered her eyes 
remained dry, Connie had already cried too many times over this.  “I’m not 
saying I’m the world’s best mother or anything but I love my children so 
dearly and I hate the fact that I’m stuck here on this ship and they are 
60,000 light years away.    
“Commander Rhodes on Deep Space 4 got me this mission, I’d said I 
wanted to push myself, to get back in the swing of things, flex my 
engineering muscles.  He said this was the perfect place, Starfleet’s brand 
new ship, a no-nonsense Captain, a quick hop to the badlands, I’d be gone a 
month at the most he told me.  Well, that just wasn’t meant to be.”
B’elanna was almost shocked.  The only thing she’d ever heard come out of 
Parsons mouth was a dirty joke or a juicy piece of gossip, she’d never quite 
considered her as a three dimensional character.
“Are you still with Mr Parsons?”  B’elanna was almost embarrassed that she 
didn’t know his first name.  
“Hmm, I’m not quite sure.  He remarried, when everyone thought that we 
were all dead, he wasn’t sorry about it though in his letter, in fact he seemed 
blissfully happy.  We were never right together, he was my first proper 
boyfriend, I thought he was cute, he thought I was funny, we were never 
that serious about each other until I fell pregnant.  I don’t know what I ever 
saw in him really, he was charming, he flattered me, quoted old earth poetry 
at odd times, replicated me little trinkets.”  Connie laughed.  “He had no 
taste, you should have seen our engagement ring it was hideous, still he 
swept me off my feet.  He knew all the right lines, the right romantic places, 
he was also a bully, a coward and had about as much loyalty as a ferengi.  
Still, I ended up marrying him.”
“Love’s not a good basis for a relationship, I understand why Vulcan’s have 
arranged marriages.”  B’elanna said, if Connie had been paying attention 
she would have seen the look of recognition in B’elanna’s eyes, as it was 
she took the comment on face value.
“No, you’ve got it all wrong.  Love is the perfect basis for a relationship, I	 
never loved Kyle, I never even thought I did, I’ve always been honest to 
myself and we both knew.  I don’t know, maybe that is the romantic in me 
talking.”  Connie looked up at her chief and saw an emotion in her she 
would not wish in anyone.  Connie thought back to her conversation with 
Annie in the mess hall before this whole fiasco had started.  She hadn’t 
really thought about it since then but now as she looked at B’elanna things 
began to make sense.  It was time to work some Parson’s magic.  “I met this 
woman once though, she’d come to Deep Space 4 for the funeral of her 
husband, the Commander thought that I could help her with the 
arrangements and she told me some really wild stories.  The kind of things 
you wouldn’t really want to know about your average ambassador but never 
have I seen anyone more in love.  When she left I asked the commander 
what he thought about their marriage.  Volatile was the word he used, he 
even said he didn’t know why they were still together after 70 years, talking 
to her for three hours though, I did.”  Connie had never met any woman on 
Deep Space 4 but it had seemed a suitable parable.  She didn’t feel like she 
was spinning her a line though, she just thought that B’elanna needed some 
evidence to cling to, it wouldn’t do for her to take the local gossip queen’s 
word on something like this.  She turned her back on B’elanna and began to 
work busily on the corner emitter.
It took Connie about 15 minutes to finish up and with that she was gone, she 
didn’t even say good bye.  
B’elanna sat quietly on a nearby biobed.  Not wishing to think about what 
Parson’s had said.  Not daring to believe that she had made a terrible 
mistake that she would regret possibly forever, not wanting to think that 
Parson’s may be right.  She would leave in a minute, she told herself, 
maybe the doctor had forgotten, maybe he was needed somewhere else.  
After about a minute she turned to look at the sleeping boy.   He stared back 
at her with large brown eyes, an air of confidence surrounded him despite 
his frail figure.
“You underestimated her, didn’t you?”  He said more as a statement than a 
question.
She stared back at him defiantly, not wanting to grace this presumptuous 
young man with an answer.  
“Auntie Connie, was so good to me when I was growing up.  She 
understood when my parents couldn’t or didn’t want to.  At 10 years old I 
knew everybody on the ship but I could only talk to two people, Connie 
Parsons and Kathryn Paris.  Connie would let me and Kate replicate 
strawberry ice cream and eat it to our hearts content in her quarters. I spilt it 
on the carpet once, if she was my mother she wouldn’t have let me out for a 
week, but she’s Connie, she just said it didn’t matter as long as I cleaned it 
up.”  Steven smiled.  He’d missed Connie so much.  His statement wasn’t 
about Connie though, it was about letting Kate’s mother ask him about her 
daughter.
“You and Kate were good friends?”  B’elanna asked, all thoughts of finding 
the doctor gone.
“She’s my best friend, always has been, always will be.”  Steven hoped she 
wouldn’t ask the question he was expecting.
“Do you...  I mean are you, in love with her.”  Predictable thought Steven, 
although he conceded that he would have asked the same question in her 
place.
“Well,” Steven smiled.  He had, were things so different now?  Yes, they 
were, that fateful night was three years ago, they’d both moved on, repaired 
their relationship, gone back to being the best of friends.  “I had a massive 
school boy crush on her when I was 14.  Even my father noticed and he’s 
normally so aloof to stuff like that.  I replicated her some red roses on my 
mother’s advice and read her Bajoran love poetry on my father’s.  She just 
laughed at me and she spent the rest of the day slaughtering me in a rather 
brutal game of Parisees squares.  Hmm, you should see her play Parisees 
squares, she’s amazing.”  B’elanna noted how he had avoided the question 
and then decided to move on with her questioning.
“Was she good at school?  I mean academically, she got all that stuff, didn’t 
she?  She didn’t struggle or anything.”
“Kate could have had any job on Voyager.  She had a bit of a hiccup with 
inter-stellar history and the ancient languages class my Dad used to teach.  
Her Bajoran is appalling and you do not want to hear her attempt Vulcan, as 
for history she was always one for living in the present, a bit ironic 
considering our current predicament.”  He failed to mention that her 
Klingon was also a little sparse, she resented it being forced down her throat 
by her father, she totally abandoned her studies when he died.  She knew a 
few good Klingon profanities though, that she normally directed at him 
playfully and, he remembered sorely, often not so playfully.  
“She had friends as well, apart from you I mean?”  B’elanna wanted to 
make sure that she had provided a better childhood for her daughter than 
she had received.  She knew what it was like to be mercilessly teased.
“Naomi Wildman and Kate have a really deep friendship that I have yet to 
fully understand.  Oh yeah and although some don’t appreciate her quick 
temper as much as I do, she has never been short of male attention – Baxter, 
Hamilton, Stewart juniors all had a ‘thing’ for her.  I’m not trying to paint 
her as some kind of deity or anything.  I mean I know her faults better than 
anyone but us Voyager ‘kids’ have to stick together.”  Steven looked down 
remembering the times that it was just Kate’s bare determination that had 
kept him going.  Where they were, all the feelings of hurt and rejection he’d 
accumulated over the years from her had been wiped away, as she 
maintained that she would get them free.  She was the strongest person he 
knew but not because of some idyll of a childhood that he seemed to be 
painting.  He didn’t think he knew a person who’d lost as much as Kate and 
lived to fight again.  She was a survivor and she was his constant, his rock, 
his friend and if he’d only done things differently she could have been 
more.
B’elanna considered his responses, always implying that there was 
something more behind each anecdote, never letting himself say what he 
felt.  She almost felt like he was just reassuring her, not telling her the 
whole truth.  Had she really been such a bad parent?
“Tell me the truth, Mr T’jour.  Why is Kathryn the way she is?  I don’t want 
any hazy nostalgia I just want your thoughts, I want to hear what you really 
think.”  B’elanna stood in front of him, her body language threatening, her 
order delivered with too much anger, it almost felt like she was challenging 
him at some kind of court martial.
“So, you want me to talk about the real Kate?  To tell you the truth I don’t 
think I can.  Who is this woman, this giant contradiction who smiles at me 
every morning from across the briefing table but won’t hesitate to tell me 
when to get off?  Y’know I don’t know what really made her the way she is.  
Some would call her cold, others would call her silly and a little immature.  
She has a great awareness of time and she’s honest to a fault, she doesn’t 
consider guilt a viable emotion, yet I think she feels guilty that she was even 
born.  She lives her life by these rules.  She hates liars and she has a definite 
problem with me when I beautify the truth a little, she tells the captain what 
she thinks and she told me once that she has never ever regretted a decision 
she has made.  But, every time she looks at you, even when she’s ordering 
you to fire, there’s an uncertainty in her eyes, as though she’s already 
accepted that you think she’s wrong, she makes her choices but she also 
wants you to make them for her.
“She can seem spiteful at times but there isn’t a person I know who doesn’t 
trust her completely.  I trust Kate more than I trust myself.  At the same 
time, I can tell you all this stuff about her and I’m not even sure if I’m 
telling you the whole story.  She’s completely upside down to me, a total 
mystery.”  Steven had let on more than he meant to.  He hoped B’elanna 
didn’t question him further.
“It’s my fault isn’t it?  I pushed her too hard, I made her feel different, I 
made her feel like she didn’t belong.  I made her doubt herself, didn’t I?”  
B’elanna asked almost spitting at the boy.  He had seemed so assured 
earlier, so confident in his words, now he just looked at her and stared, he 
seemed small, a little boy in her eyes.
“It’s not any one’s fault, that’s just it.  That’s Kate all over, there always has 
to be someone to blame.”  He rolled over on his side, looking away from 
B’elanna.  “But what do I know?  I lie here psycho-analysing this person 
and I know barely more about her than you do.  I mean... I don’t know what 
I mean, don’t ask me, ask her.  God, what is this?  Are you looking for 
guilt?  She’s a wonderful person, she’s kind and compassionate and has a 
very weird sense of humour, she has her problems but they’ve shaped who 
she is.  I don’t know why I’ve told you all this, maybe I needed to say it 
more than you needed to hear it.”  His tone had been able to get steadily 
angrier as he didn’t have to keep eye contact with the menacing presence he 
was sharing sickbay with.  He didn’t know why he had gotten so angry.  It 
was unlike him to be so aggressive, but talking about Kate, had opened up a 
whole chasm of feeling that he had to get out.  He felt like every time he 
said something to criticise Kate, it was as though he was directly attacking 
her mother.  B’elanna Torres had died before Steven was born yet he felt he 
could second guess her every movement, he knew what was coming.  This 
was the indignant stand, the ‘I don’t need you’ throw away comment would 
be next.  
“What do you know.”  B’elanna said coldly as she turned to leave sick bay.
“Nothing, I know absolutely nothing, that’s what I’ve been trying to say for 
the last ten minutes if you had bothered to listen.”  Steven shouted at her as 
she began to head for the sick bay doors.  
*************************************************************
**************

12.22pm
“Good for you Harry, he’s not all that bad you know.”  Annika smiled as 
Harry Kim lifted himself higher inside the compartment in the shuttle.
“Erm, sonic spanner?”  Harry said, his hand outstretched.
“Here you are,” Annika handed him the tool and picked up a nearby padd.
“Yeah, I thought about what you said.  You’re right, still tomorrow I’ll not 
know that any of this happened.”  Harry said as he pulled himself back into 
the main part of the craft.
“If it works that is.”  Annika said, standing up and going over to the 
controls.
“Hey, whatever happened to your whole perfection marred by humanity 
thing?  I liked that calm ‘I can do anything’ assurance you had, frustrating 
but reassuring.”  Harry smiled as he brushed himself down, shuttles 
shouldn’t get that dusty.
“I’m not Seven, Harry.  I gave up on perfection a long time ago.”  Annika 
stared down at the implants in her hand.
Harry felt stupid.  He’d forgotten himself.  She was right, he wasn’t talking 
to Seven.
“Speaking of Seven, where is she?”  Harry asked staring out of the shuttle 
bay doors into the maintenance lab.  “I’m sure I saw her 10 minutes ago.”
“She went to see the Captain, I’m not sure what about.  Mumbled 
something about the doctor and sickbay.  She’ll be back in a minute.”  
Annika sat herself back in the pilot’s chair.
“So, the future huh?”  Harry asked.
“Yes, Harry the future and you are asking me what exactly?”  Annika 
smiled, he was just as she had remembered, everyone was.  She passed 
people in the corridors and wanted to tell them to always be careful of ‘warp 
nacelles’ or not to go into the science lab on various stardates.  Still, she 
could at least give out advice, cryptic as it was.
“Well, I suspect that things are well, a little different.”  Harry sat down in 
the co-pilots seat.
“All due to the small matter of, oh, 26 years. Harry, I’m not telling you a 
thing, my lips are sealed.”  Annika looked at him and smiled, she played 
with a control nearby.
“Oh well, I suppose a few little pointers are out of the question?”  He asked 
almost teasingly.
“Well, here we go.  Number 1 – When an insecure ex-borg asks you out for 
dinner, don’t laugh.  Number 2 – Always praise Neelix’s cooking, no matter 
how bad it is.  Number 3 – Be there for your friends.  Number 4 – Never 
volunteer to babysit – it’s not your strongest suit.  Number 5 – Practice 
more often, I mean at your clarinet.  Number 6, erm Number 6, okay there 
you go – my five rules for easy living on Voyager.  I live by 2 – 4, 1 and 5 I 
threw in just for you.  There, aren’t you impressed?”  Annika smiled at him 
but looked at him fiercely.
“Sounds right by me, Yes I should definitely practise the old clarinet more 
often but number 1, that just isn’t going to happen.”  Harry looked down as 
Annika’s gaze intensified.  She reached out her hand to his chin and pulled 
his face towards hers.  She leant forward and placed her lips firmly upon 
his, her hand moving back to run through his hair.  He reached his hand out 
to her and caressed her cheek gently.  Annika broke the kiss as soon as the 
tears began to well in her eyes.  She felt like apologising but she wasn’t 
sorry.
“Well, I’d better go find Seven.” she said as she stood up.  “Don’t laugh 
Harry, please?  She’s not as tough as she makes out.”  Annika quickly left 
the confines of the shuttle and strode out confidently into the bay.  Harry 
just sat there and chuckled quietly to himself.  That was the most ‘nicely’ 
surreal experience he’d ever had.  Shame he’d forget by the next morning.
*************************************************************
************

2.40pm
“Come in!”  What did he want?  More awkward question and answer 
sessions, she really didn’t have the energy.  She considered hiding the bottle 
she’d swiped from Neelix’s kitchen, why would ship’s doctor be carrying 
around talaxian wine?  Still, she didn’t care, she had gone beyond caring.  
The only thought that drove her through was getting off this ship of ghosts.  
She was sick of making small talk with people who had been dead most of 
her life, her parents were no exception.
Tom Paris entered Kathryn’s temporary quarters and squinted in the 
darkness.  He could just about make out a figure on the sofa with the light 
from the corridor.  When that was gone, he was left with the dark and it 
wasn’t a comforting dark it was a dark fraught with tension. 
“How about turning the lights on?”  He asked as he stumbled over a coffee 
table.
“Computer 40% illumination.”  The lights came on and Tom Paris could 
now clearly see his daughter lying on the sofa in the far corner.  “What do 
you want, I’m trying to catch up on some reading here, I’d prefer not to be 
interrupted.”  He stared at her, her hair was down now and about her 
shoulders, curling wildly at the ends, her face remained sickly pale, he also 
noticed with a slight grimace the half empty bottle of talaxian merlot to her 
left.
“Drinking?  Seems you picked up some of my bad habits.”  She was 26, it 
wasn’t the time for him to start lecturing her on the ‘demon’ drink.
“Look, I’ve tried to be subtle for you but I’ve got a load of work to do and it 
would suit me down to the ground if you left now.  The door’s over there.”  
She pointed vaguely at the door, she was slightly drunk and she didn’t like 
the way she was slurring her words, she also didn’t like the way the anger 
was coursing through her veins. She’d tried so hard to sell this image to 
him.  This strong, independent, look how well I’ve turned out image, it was 
her way of telling him that she didn’t need him, that she’d been fine on her 
own.  Still it looked like he was going to see every frayed emotion, every 
ugly, angst ridden black spot, every thing that had been ‘I don’t even want 
to think about that’ until now.  For the last two hours that was all she had 
thought about, she had faced up to her guilt and resentment and it had won, 
which was predictable.
“What did I do?”  Tom asked, the question was simple but still very hard to 
get out.  He could have made it sound light, a joke almost, he’d said too 
many things lightly though.
“I think I’m just pissed at you in general, it’d be hard to pick out a moment.  
Let’s start here though, in about eight years time, Janeway offers you some 
ridiculous mission to go out getting tachion particles or something to do 
with engineering, I can’t remember I never asked, anyway you took it and 
then that was it, you were dead and I was an orphan.  Satisfied?”  That had 
seemed harsh and a malevolent glint danced in her eyes, she was annoyed 
that at the way it had come out, this was almost 20 years of her own 
personal crap and it was flowing far too easily.  She stared at him for a 
while, he said nothing, she thought about ordering him to leave again, no, it 
was his turn.
Tom didn’t know what to say and that didn’t happen very often.  “Hmm, 
sounds a good place to start, I guess.  Go right ahead, I’m quite used to 
people listing my shortcomings, happens all the time, I’m used to it.”  Tom 
smiled to spite himself at that comment, partly because its accuracy 
depressed him immensely.  She turned away from him, for fear that tears 
would start rolling down her cheeks.
“I really pissed you off, didn’t I?  I suppose you blame me for all your 
problems in later life.  Figures, I blame my dad, why should you be any 
different?”  Tom said, not quite sure why he had.  He thought he wanted a 
reaction from her.
“Oh yes that’s right, the poor little tortured Admiral’s son, how terrible your 
child hood must have been, forgive me, how can mine even compare to 
Starfleet galas and all the best schools, must have been hell.  I’m so sorry, 
how do you cope?”  The cold look remained in her eyes as she delivered her 
blow with calculated precision.  She’d been thinking that up for a while. “I 
don’t blame you for most of it, just some of it.  I’m a doctor, I’ve got 
medical names for most of the things that are wrong with me.”  She reached 
behind her head and scratched her implant again.  It itched like hell.  Her 
voice had gone soft again, all the anger drained away.  He didn’t seem to 
want to fight, that was a shame as all Kathryn wanted to do was fight.
“Well that’s reassuring, so, what are you reading?”  He sat down on a chair 
nearby, it was strange, all the animosity in the air had vanished he felt 
almost relaxed.
“Official logs, past six years, I’m making sure our timeline matches up.  
They’re quite funny actually, you’ve done some amazing stuff and some 
very stupid stuff as well from what I’ve read.  I don’t know why I didn’t 
look them up before, didn’t have the time really.”  She laughed quietly to 
herself, forgetting totally where she was.  “You want to know what this ship 
needs?”
“What?”  Tom asked, the conversation now coming very easily.  She 
seemed more relaxed, still he had to choose his words carefully, he didn’t 
want her blowing up at him, one word answers seemed safest.
“A counsellor, I mean God, a counsellor would have a lot of fun with you, 
with me for that matter.  We could keep a counsellor busy for weeks, years 
even.  So, what’s going on in your life, how’s the conn?  I’m sick of talking 
about my wreck of a life so let’s talk about yours.”  A slight malice had 
returned to her voice.
“The conn, oh it’s fine.  That’s it, nothing else to report, at a push I can talk 
about the holo-deck, haven’t really been on it in a while though.  Hmm, 
that’s my life, fascinating huh?”  The only thing that had been on Tom’s 
mind was B’elanna and that topic really didn’t seem appropriate.
“Oh, here’s a pointer,” she said pulling herself into a sitting position.  
“Don’t use the Captain Proton programme to try and help me get to sleep. I 
hate it, Dr Chaotica gives me nightmares to this day.  And please that 
Captain Proton thing is such a wish fulfilment exercise anyway, and as for 
that secretary, didn’t you ever hear of women’s lib, y’know it was quite a 
big thing, oh 400 years ago.  Still, I never got your whole 20th century 
fixation, for my seventh birthday you gave me a rubik’s cube.  I ask you, is 
there anything more pointless?”  She laughed at the memory, she’d 
expected something more contemporary when she’d open the plastic 
wrapping paper.
“Couldn’t solve it, could you.”
“I have been trying to solve it for 20 years, and no, I still can’t but that is 
because it is completely pointless.”  She looked down at the padd in her 
hand again.  “I’m awful at all those kind of game’s anyway – chess, Kalto 
they are all stupid.  But I can wipe the Parisees squares court with anyone,”
“Do you want to go play?  I’m sure I could give you a decent match.”  Tom 
had thought they were making progress but as the words had escaped his 
mouth the coldness returned to her eyes.
“No, we haven’t got time, you should be with Mum anyway, not swapping 
faults with me.”  She picked her glass up and took a long swig, she knew he 
wasn’t meant to be there with her, too many possibilities for changing time.
“Your mother and I, aren’t really talking properly right now.  She’s having 
a late lunch, catch up thing with Harry and I wouldn’t want to impose.”  
Tom said looking down at his hands
“I know, must be tough and I mean that.  I’m not totally uncaring towards 
the hardships of normal people just a little insensitive towards them.  I think 
I can just about understand, just about that is.  Don’t push your luck though, 
or I’ll tell you something really depressing, just to prove to you how much 
worse my life is.  Don’t tempt me.”  She breathed out deeply. 
“I’ll be going then, that doesn’t really sound like my idea of fun.”  It was 
meant to be a joke.
“Good call,” It wasn’t taken as one.
“So, bye then, don’t leave without saying goodbye.”  Tom turned to leave.
“Oh believe me, I won’t.” 
Tom considered the value of that conversation and was glad that he 
wouldn’t remember any of it by the next morning.  He’d known it was a 
risk, asking her what he’d done, he was hoping it would be less depressing, 
a forgotten meeting, an argument over curfews but he realised that what he 
had done must be more important, and her explanation had been all too 
plausible.  He looked at her again from his vantage-point by her door, she 
was staring out of her window pulling her unruly hair back with her hands 
and tying it up.  Tom left, confusion outweighing guilt and regret, sadly, 
Tom knew that would soon fade.
*************************************************************
**************

4.10pm
Janeway did a double take.  No, there was definitely someone sitting in her 
chair, quietly sipping tea and reading a padd.  Janeway hesitated slightly.  It 
was the first time in about 6 years that she had been faced with someone of 
the same rank, an equal.  Whatever she was, Janeway concluded, that was 
her chair.
“Captain Wildman?”  Janeway said as she walked towards her desk.
“Ah Captain Janeway, I’m sorry, I know this is still your chair, your desk, 
your office.  But, my afternoon tea habit dies hard and I wish to speak with 
you anyway.”  Naomi said barely looking Janeway in the eyes and making 
no attempt to get up from the chair.  “I believe you talked to Commander 
Hansen this morning, is that correct?”  Janeway nodded even though she 
disliked Captain Wildman’s authoritarian tone.  “You also visited Dr Paris 
in sickbay and talked to Lieutenant T’jour.  All three informed me that you 
asked, what could be termed difficult questions, Dr Paris especially found 
your questions intrusive of her privacy.  If you have any questions Captain, 
I would think it logical that you addressed them to me.”  Janeway felt like 
she was being accused of something, her questions had been nothing more 
than small talk and she had made nothing of their hesitant answers.  Captain 
Wildman’s response led her to believe that they were hiding something and 
this little exchange did nothing but make Janeway more suspicious.
“Captain, you are sitting in my seat.”  Janeway had not replied directly for a 
reason, she felt vulnerable the other side of the table and she wanted to 
regain command.  Naomi stood up and moved away allowing Janeway 
access to her seat.  As Janeway sat down, feeling immediately more in 
control she replied.  “Captain, I appreciate that this is a hard time for you 
and your crew and for me and mine, but this is not the way to handle a 
complaint.  I, obviously do not believe that I have asked any awkward 
questions of your crew, I would not want to put them under any excess 
strain.  But, Captain if you continue to keep me in the dark about the 
physical condition of one of your party and the progress on the 
modifications to the shuttle then I can do nothing but find that information 
out for myself.  This is still my ship.”  Janeway said, sounding slightly 
exasperated
“Well then, I have an awkward question to ask of you.  I inherit this ship, 
I’d like to know why I had to.”  Naomi asked, she’d been angry as she took 
the turbolift up, fuming would be more accurate.  Anger had got the better 
of her again, she was just going to ask Janeway politely to stop harassing 
her crew but the reason for her visit had become more personal, Naomi 
needed to know why.  For years, Captain Kathryn Janeway had been the 
focus of a lot of hate from her, a perfect scapegoat, someone to blame who 
couldn’t defend herself.  But now, faced with the woman in person, her 
convictions, what was right and wrong had merged into an infuriating blur.  
She needed to prove to herself that Janeway had been wrong, so that she 
could start making those tough decisions again and start getting her crew 
home.  Wherever that was.
Janeway looked stunned, the question itself took a good minute to decipher.  
Janeway gave up and decided to ask her directly what it meant.  “What does 
that mean?”
“I’m sure you’ve gathered by now that we don’t go home to some glorious 
heroes welcome.  Things are different. I’ve lost a lot of good people, many 
of whom were very close to me.  I was just wondering, why you got us 
stranded out here, a simple explanation would do.”
“The prime directive states...”
“Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer.  I should have known, ok then 
if you’re going to hide behind your Star fleet principal, there is no point in 
this conversation.  You know I was hoping I’d finally get an answer, some 
logic I could hold onto.  I am so tired of looking at my crew, my friends and 
realising that we wouldn’t be living through this hell if it wasn’t for you.”  
Naomi was almost shouting.
“I see and have you ever considered what life would be like for you if 
Voyager had not come to the Delta Quadrant?  I don’t think you’d be able 
to count Commander Hansen or Dr Paris among your crew that’s for sure.  
Trust me, I didn’t make that decision lightly and I’ve thought about it a lot.  
Still, the fact remains that I can’t go back and change my decision, we have 
to deal with things as they come, take things in our stride.”
“Then why bother returning to the alpha quadrant at all?  Find a nice little 
M class planet, some resources, you’ll be happy and I won’t be here.”
“Because the alpha quadrant is my home, our home and I promised this 
crew I’d get them there, however long it took.”
“You’re being stubborn.  Travelling like this you are all at risk of being 
killed.  You face danger and death on a daily basis.  If you just found a 
planet to settle on, I’m sure the crew would settle, you said it yourself 
people cope with the situations they are faced with, no-one would think you 
a bad captain.”
“I made a promise to my crew.”  Janeway said looking Naomi directly in 
the eye.
“A promise that I can tell you, you will never fulfil.  Turn around Kathryn, 
save some lives.”
“I can’t do that.”
“No, because you’re holding on.  You know just as well as I do the names 
of the people under your command that you have lost, at least give the rest 
of the crew a fighting chance.  Don’t condemn them to this!”  Naomi was 
now shouting and not caring who heard.
“They’re star fleet officers they know the risks.”
“You’re just taking the easy option, cruising along, not really wanting to 
think about the big picture, clutching onto your precious alpha quadrant.  
The better decision, the right decision is to create a settlement as soon as 
you find a suitable uninhabited planet.  But still you are here, 6 years in the 
delta quadrant, refusing to let go.”
“So, I choose to fight and try to get my crew home, I am doing as I said I 
would, I’m being their Captain, I’m doing my duty.”
“Your duty will get them all killed.  I’m doing you a favour, I’m making it 
easy it for you.  Give up your hopeless fight, Kathryn.”
“This isn’t getting us anywhere, Naomi.  I’m not going to change my mind 
and I won’t let you threaten me into changing it.”
“I’m just telling you the truth.”
“A truth that may never happen.  I have to live in the present and I have to 
do what I think is right.”
“You’d think being a Star Fleet Captain you’d know when to give up.”  
Naomi said as she turned to leave.  She was angry almost distressed at 
Janeway’s unflinching stance.  She’d thought she could try and change 
things, that was part of the reason Naomi had been so interested in the 
cosmic string technology her engineers were developing, an invaluable 
resource, a way to change things for the better, a way to bring some people 
back.  Still, with this mistake on the first run, it didn’t look as though they’d 
be able to really use and understand the technology to the degree that was 
needed to change everything.  That was why Naomi had gone to Captain 
Janeway, but it had all been in vain.    
As Naomi began to leave, Janeway spoke.  “You’d think as a Star Fleet 
Captain you’d never give up.”  Naomi stopped as she heard Janeway’s 
words, felt she should say something but ultimately left quietly.  Naomi 
realised that Janeway just wouldn’t listen.
The doors swished shut and Naomi Wildman was gone.  Janeway 
considered Naomi’s argument for a moment and then pushed it to the back 
of her mind.  She had been through this before, she knew the names of 
every person who had died under her command, and every time she 
completed the list in her mind, she knew she had to get home.  
*************************************************************
**************

4.30pm
“Ha, you composed a sonata.  What’s it called?”
“I don’t quite know, I was thinking the nursery sonata or something like 
that, you name it.”
“Hmm, well I’ll have to give it some thought.  The nursery sonata sounds 
slightly sentimental, she’s going to be a tough, working girl.”
“So it needs a tough working girl, kinda name?  I’ll have to think about it.”  
Harry said, smiling at B’elanna, it had been a while since he’d been this 
relaxed.  “Have you thought of a name for her yet?”  Harry said looking at 
B’elanna’s belly.
“I suppose it’s already been decided, we call her Kathryn.  I must admit 
though, it wouldn’t have been my first choice, I wouldn’t want her to be 
named after someone else.”  B’elanna sighed.  It had been a nice lunch with 
Harry, he’d managed to talk about himself for a good three quarters of an 
hour, something that B’elanna didn’t mind at all.
“I get the feeling that it is Tom’s choice of name, don’t you?”
“Yeah.”  B’elanna didn’t want to talk about Tom.  “So, how’s the shuttle 
going?”
“Oh, now the shuttle, it’s definitely been a challenge.”
“What, working with Annika?  I’ve heard she can be a little emotional, 
Ensign Cortez said she saw her start crying in the corridor yesterday but 
I’ve only seen her with this massive grin plastered across her face.  I don’t 
know which one annoys me more, Seven or Annika.”
“It’s weird, you’re working with someone who looks exactly like Seven but 
she looks happy to see you and cracks jokes and I don’t think I’ve ever 
heard her say ‘irrelevant’ once.”
“You like her, don’t you Harry.”  B’elanna teased her friend.
“Ah, but the difference here is that she likes me back!”
“Don’t get too excited Harry.  She’s not exactly datable material, tomorrow 
you’ll forget all about her.”
“Hmm, How was the check up?”  That was a question Tom should be 
asking, B’elanna realised.
“Didn’t have one, the doctor was no where to be seen this morning.  I was 
stuck in sickbay with that T’jour kid and Connie Parsons.  It was lots of fun, 
I can assure you.”
“What’s he like that T’jour kid, I mean is he anything like...”
Harry and B’elanna both looked up to see Anya Pederson smiling down at 
them.  “Can I join you?”  B’elanna glanced around, a Delaney sister and 
Ensign L’elloni were sitting at a far table, normally Anya would have sat 
with them.  B’elanna wondered why she wanted to sit with her.
“Sure, sit down.”  Harry said smiling.  B’elanna noted that it wasn’t just 
Annika Hansen that Harry had eyes for.
“Thanks, I was wondering if you’d like to come to my recital tonight.  Both 
of you, it should be fun and people tell me I can hammer out a good tune.”  
Anya smiled nervously, she usually avoided dining with members of the 
senior staff, they always looked so serious.
“I’d like to be there but I find myself falling asleep at 1900 hours most 
nights, I’m sorry to be boring.  Harry can go though, can’t you.”  B’elanna 
said
“Yes, hey maybe we could play a duet some time?”  Harry had been 
thinking about asking her for what seemed like an age.
“I’d like that, it’s always good to have someone to practise with, keeps me 
more disciplined.”  Anya smiled again, a shy smile but a very pretty one.  
“My Dad used to nag me at home, I hated it.  I miss it now, even though I 
used to grumble.  Hey, but I’ve got kids of my own to boss around now, 
haven’t I?”  It was meant to be a joke but Anya’s words were hollow.
“You and me both.”  B’elanna and Anya giggled and then stopped because 
it just wasn’t funny anymore. 
*************************************************************
*************
5.20pm
“Captain, I’m so glad you could join us.  Our little reunion is complete.”  
Steven T’jour said using Annika almost as a crutch.
“I don’t want you here, what do you think you are going to accomplish?”  
Naomi said, still fuming at Janeway but letting her crew bare the brunt.
They all stared back to the place on the wall, Deck 4, section 18, right by 
the turbolift.
“We thought about erecting a force-field, level 10, that should hold it.”  
Annika said.
“You haven’t got the clearance.”  Naomi said, happier to list the mechanical 
problems rather than the temporal ones.
“It’s not a question of clearance, it’s about....”
A crewman walked by, Steven stopped.  The crewman stared at them, 
wondering exactly why they had gathered in a semi-circle around a spot on 
the wall, a very ordinary looking spot on the wall.    He then walked on and 
gave the matter little more thought.
“It’s about,” Steven continued.  “Changing our past, I’m no physicist but 
different past means different future.”
“Seven people are killed when this section is lost.  We can’t stand by and let 
that happen, we can’t let people die.”  Annika said weakly.
“We have to,” Kathryn said.  Casting a look over each of her friend’s faces, 
she had to be strong for them.  She’d given this more thought than any of 
them, she was best qualified to make the decision.
“We’re agreed then, we’ll ride this out in the shuttle bay.  It remains 
relatively undamaged doesn’t it?”  Naomi said
“Yes, but they’ll expect Steve back in sickbay.”  Kathryn said, she hoped 
her Captain wouldn’t remember sickbay’s significance.
“Oh, okay then, Annika you’ll take Steve back to sickbay.  Kate you’ll stay 
with me.”  It had been a while since Naomi had called her doctor by her 
first name.
“No, I want to be there.”
“Don’t torture yourself,”
“I’m not.  I have to face this, you said it yourself.”
“I meant emotionally not physically.  I’m not letting you go to sickbay.”
“But,” Annika and Steven looked down, Steven would have left if he had 
not needed Annika’s support, he felt out of place.
“That’s an order.”  Naomi said sternly.
“What?  Do you think I’m going to commit temporal suicide or 
something?”  Steven and Annika flinched, but Naomi stood firm.  She was 
used to Kathryn’s blunt nature.
“Okay, we’ll play it your way.  I don’t trust you to make the right decision.”
“Well you’re going to have to.  I’ve made up my mind.”
“About what, exactly?”
“To be in sickbay, nothing more.”
“I know you Kate.”
“No you don’t, you haven’t got the first clue, none of you have.”
“It’s been rough for all of us Kate.”  Steven said in an angry rasp, he felt 
weak and light headed but he hoped it’d pass.
“You think I don’t know that!”  Kathryn shouted.  Annika stared at her, this 
had been on the cards for a while, but it was very unfortunate timing.
“I am not going to take this from you.  I am your Captain and I am issuing 
you a direct order, you are not to enter sickbay, at all.  I understand you may 
have personal issues to deal with but this is not the time, you have to be 
professional, we all do.”  Naomi slipped back into Captain mode.  She 
didn’t know how many times she’d heard Kate make a similar speech.  
Steven felt a tingling sensation rush all over his body and his eyes slowly 
closing, his legs giving way from under him.  Annika tried to catch him but 
he fell heavily to the floor.  Kathryn rushed to him, turning him on his side, 
checking his pulse, his breathing.  Not hesitating she hit her comm-badge.  
“Transporter room.”
“Here,” came the reply, the young woman sounded slightly unsure of 
herself.
“Two to beam directly to sickbay.”
“Stand by.”
The blue haze surrounded them both and Naomi watched them disappear.  It 
crossed her mind that she may never see Kathryn again. 
“Annika, the shuttle bay.”  Naomi marched towards the turbolift.  “Quickly 
we haven’t got much time,” The turbolift doors swished open and Annika 
followed Naomi inside.
*************************************************************
**************
6.12pm
The ship shook.  “Chief!”  Parsons was moving quickly now, leaping away 
from her station.  Something exploded behind her, red light illuminated 
engineering.
“Bridge to Engineering.”
“Nicoletti here.”
“Can we go to warp?”
“I, I erm No, Captain we can’t.” 
 Another station exploded, white sparks flew, smoke flooded the room.  
Parson’s hair straggled around her face, clinging to the sweat that ran down 
it.  She called again “Chief!”  In her haste she tripped and fell heavily to the 
floor.  She stood up, ignoring the driving pain in her skull and kicked a 
metallic looking object away from Vorik.  She glanced at him, blood had 
turned the yellow of his engineering uniform a distinct Vulcan green, a 
glassy look in his eyes.  Dead.  Star fleet training kicked in, she moved on.  
Nicoletti stood in front of her, frantically moving debris away from Carey.  
Tears stained Nicoletti’s cheeks, as she took Carey’s pulse.  Dead, thought 
Parsons as she grabbed Nicoletti by the arm and pulled her away heading 
dertermindly towards the door.  Outside, thought Parsons, got to get out.  
Suddenly Bristow was at her side carrying some young Ensign, Connie 
couldn’t make her out, her face was badly burnt.  Connie coughed violently 
as the smoke entered her lungs, a faint scream to Nicoletti and Bristow to 
leave, a push on Nicoletti’s arm, a reassuring pat on Fredie’s back.
“Chief!”  The words were harder to get out this time as tears from the 
smoke welled up, impairing Parson’s vision and lessening her resolve.  She 
looked around her, smoke everywhere, red lights flashing and not a sign of 
Torres.  Her footing gave way as the ship lurched again, the corridor where 
she now stood strangely quiet.  Parsons turned and went back into the 
smoke.
*************************************************************
**************

6.24pm
“Report!”  Janeway screamed, hoping someone was conscious to hear her.  
Chakotay lay slumped in his chair, the young ensign who had been assigned 
the conn lay sprawled on the floor in front of Janeway, his chest eerily inert.
“Structural integrity at 22% and falling, warp core off line, Decks 4 through 
10 are badly damaged, shields are none existent, computer not responding.”  
Harry Kim said, trying to ignore the driving pain in his side.  He looked 
down tentatively, grimaced at the odd angle the chard had embedded itself 
and collapsed.
Janeway turned to see Ensign Kim on the floor, he was face down, no way 
to tell if he was breathing.  She had noticed though that after almost ten 
minutes of constant barrage all now seemed still.
“Captain Janeway?”  A voice came over her comm badge, muffled by 
static.
“I’m here” Janeway replied.
“I’d just like you to know that I am doing this against my better judgement.”  
The woman’s voice was then totally muffled by static, but Janeway knew it 
well.  That voice had been running through her mind since their little chat 
earlier.  Janeway was not pleased by this message though, she did not trust 
Captain Naomi Wildman.
*************************************************************
**************

6.32pm
“This one’s dead, Next!”  Kathryn shouted beckoning to an Engineer 
carrying an injured Ensign.  Running the medical tricorder over the woman,  
“Okay, second degree burns to the face and neck, ruptured spleen and some 
kidney damage.  Put her down over there.”  She pointed to the doctor’s 
office.  Steven T’jour sat, rubbing his eyes in the corner, watching the 
confusion unfold.  To Steven the whole experience wasn’t particularly 
frightening he’d been through far worse, what made this bad was the look of 
sheer terror on everyone’s faces, even the holodoc looked frantic.  Kate 
stood calmly in the centre of this emotional storm, her reserve high lighting 
how different these people were from them.  Steven felt useless, he began to 
pull himself up.
“Okay, your turn.”  Kate ran the tricorder over an unconscious crewman.  
“Brain haemorrhage, right, moving on.”
The doctor watched his young counterpart at work as he repaired Ensign 
Delaney’s broken leg.  Tom Paris was helping Ensign L’elloni on the far 
side of sick bay near the door where the numerous new additions had 
gathered.  Both the doctor’s assitants looked drained, mumbling ‘sorrys’ to 
bereft crewmembers, stumbling as if in a daze over their words, their minds 
elsewhere.  Kathryn on the other hand moved like a woman possessed, not a 
hint of emotion on her face, her eyes as cold as ever.  Not hesitating to roll 
dead crewmembers off biobeds to make room for new ones.  It seemed she 
was used to high stress situations.
*************************************************************
**************

6.36pm
Annika Hansen walked into Astrometrics.  Seven was frantically working 
away at the computer, a look of frustration on her face.
“They’re mines, pure Kastronamide, the most unstable substance known to 
ever exist.  They’ll fling tiny pieces of energy out in all directions, zooming 
through shields and knocking out warp cores easily.”  Annika said.
“How do we avoid them?”
“You can’t.”
“Then what do I do?”
“There’s nothing you can do.”
“The borg haven’t met technology like this, it’s beyond the bounds of my 
knowledge.”
“Weird feeling, believe me I know.”
“What happens?”
“I don’t know.”
“But you’ve lived through this timeline, you know what will occur.”
“Well, we’re making a few changes.”
“That will lead to a degradation of your timeline, you will cease...” 
With a smile, Annika raised her arm and knocked Seven out, clean. 
“Trust me, Ensigns Denez and Cooper will thank you for it.”  And with that, 
Annika ran out of Astrometrics.  She liked this, a lot.
*************************************************************
**************
6.41pm
Connie Parsons let out a sigh of relief as the sickbay doors came into view, 
carrying a pregnant half Klingon had taken a toll on her middle aged back.
“Move!”  She shouted to the walking wounded who had gathered just inside 
sickbay.
“Doctor!”  Tom Paris had been on the other side of the room, repairing a 
ruptured spleen.  He’d seen the small frame of Connie Parsons enter, using 
every ounce of strength she had left to carry B’elanna.  On seeing her, Tom 
had pushed past those who stood in the middle of sickbay and was 
immediately at Connie’s side, lifting B’elanna gently away from her.
Kathryn Paris had seen her mother being carried into sickbay also, a pang of 
recognition as the events unfolded as they always had.  She picked up the 
instrument Tom had dropped and began to repair the ruptured spleen, 
slowly, making sure she kept her head down, maybe they’d forget that she 
was there.  The Captain had been right, it was a bad idea for her to be in 
sickbay.
“What are you going to do?”  Steven T’jour had managed to hobble over to 
his friend.
“There’s nothing I can do.”  Kathryn replied still not looking up, pressing a 
hand over the Ensign’s abdomen, she didn’t need to but Kathryn was still 
more used to operating without so many gadgets.  Steven smiled and patted 
her on the shoulder.  He’d misunderstood her.  “I have to save her.”  Up 
until that moment she hadn’t been sure herself, but seeing her mother lying 
there looking so weak.  It was against everything that Kathryn believed in, 
everything that she had fought for to just let her die.  Still Kathryn couldn’t 
shake the feeling of absolute terror that had come over her.  Her hands 
shook at her sides and her lips trembled.  She’d never been this scared.  The 
lack of respect she had for her own mortality and the way she’d always been 
so independent had made fear easier to cope with, until now.  Before it had 
been easier, standing up to the prison guards, organising their escape, 
dodging enemy fire, heat of the moment stuff, easy to handle.  Now things 
were cold, clean almost clinical.  She had to make a decision that she 
couldn’t explain away on adrenalin.  
“I don’t want to lose you.”
“You won’t know I even existed.”
“That’s why I can’t let you do it.  You know if this was any other type of 
suicide mission, I wouldn’t stand in your way.  You are my friend I trust 
you to make the right decision.  I let you do your stupid risk taking heroics 
because I always knew that if anything happened to you, I’d always be able 
to remember you, you’d always live on.  Stupid as that sounds its important 
to me.  Now though it’s just a waste, a pure mindless waste and I can’t let 
you do that.  Whatever deep dark guilt issues you’ve got going on here they 
don’t matter.  You matter more, we need you more, I need you more.”
“I can’t let her die.”
“You can’t not.”  He was right and Kathryn knew it.  At the moment her 
desire for self-preservation was holding its own against the strange sense of 
duty and fate that was compelling her to save her mother’s life.
“Captain Wildman to Dr Paris.”  Kathryn could barely hear the voice.
“Paris here,”
“Prepare to instigate, Scenario Epsilon 4.”
“ Scenario Epsilon 4?  Now you must understand Captain, I can’t sit idly 
by.”
“I’ll miss you Kate.”  Even though the voice was faint, it held an emotion 
that Kate had not heard recently from her Captain, determination.  For such 
a long time now, Naomi had let indecision rule, unsure of her actions, 
constantly double-checking.  Naomi’s guilt was real, and all consuming, so 
strangely like the woman she despised, Kathryn Janeway.  Still, at last, they 
had agreed on something and even though terror ran through her Kathryn 
knew what she had to do.
“Thank you Captain, Paris out.”  Her voice wavered as the static roared 
over her comm badge.
“That doesn’t change anything.  I can’t let you do this.”  Steven placed a 
hand firmly on Kathryn’s shoulder, pushing her back towards the wall. 
“I’ll blame you for the rest of my life.”  She said quietly, but making no 
attempt to duck away.  He was giving her a chance to stall and that was all 
she wanted now, more time.
“It’s always been about blame with you, hasn’t it Paris?”  Steven pushed her 
harder against the wall, matching the look of frustration in her eyes.  
Arching his back and stooping over her so that he looked more dominant 
even though every muscle in his body ached and willed him to stop.
She stared at him, angry that he was trying to stop her, terrified that he 
wouldn’t succeed.  She’ made her mind up and as she raised her hands to 
push him away, she knew she couldn’t leave him like this.  He was her best 
friend and she owed him more of an explanation than time allowed.  She 
felt like telling him she loved him, but that’d be irrelevant.  She felt that he 
knew about her feelings for him, it would just complicate things if she 
spoke the words.  She reprimanded herself, her mind was wandering, 
thinking about anything, nothing so as not to think about the task at hand.  
She raised her arms and put them around his neck, he put his limp arms 
around her waist.
There was nothing he could do.  She’d made her decision.  He hugged her 
as tightly as his sore arms would allow and knew that it’d have to be a good 
line, the last he’d ever say to her.
“I’ll miss you so much,” It wasn’t what he’d planned, something more up 
beat, cleverer but he’d opted out, gone all gooey and sentimental.
“Have a good life, Stephen T’jour.”
“What no live long and prosper, you disappoint me Paris.”  Steven said, 
pulling away from her, stroking her hair gently away from her eyes.  And 
for once Steven saw something in those normally placid eyes and he was 
glad it was there.  It was fear.  A smile danced across his lips to spite the 
tears that welled in his eyes.  He was losing her.
“It’s a Vulcanism and despite public opinion, I don’t share their philosophy 
on life,” she said, a strained self-knowing smile accompanied it.
“That’s good to know,” he said, unable of how to continue.  He knew what 
he should say, he should tell her that he loved her but he couldn’t bring 
himself to say the words.  He’d said them once and she’d ignored him for 
months.  Slowly they’d got back to being ‘just’ friends, an equilibrium he 
was happy with and would have to stay happy with even though now, as he 
was about to lose her, he wished he hadn’t been so willing to cope, he 
wished he’d fought for her.
She swallowed hard, her mouth felt dry.  This was goodbye.  She reached 
her hand out and stroked his cheek with the back of her hand.  He shut his 
eyes as her skin connected gently with his.  Her other hand reached into his 
and he squeezed it gently, neither had the words
He opened his eyes as she removed her hand from his grasp.  She smiled a 
weak smile and then turned her back on him and walked towards where 
every conscious person in the room was focused, every conscious person 
except Steve who kept his eyes constantly on Kate, as if memorising her 
every move.  He was unsure of what to do now.  Crying was the easy 
option.  
*************************************************************
**************
6.59pm
“Defence capabilities?”  Naomi asked, from her seat at the conn.  Her hands 
worked quickly on the panels in front of her, her brain was racing.  It wasn’t 
like her to make such erratic decisions, her thinking was normally so linear.  
She knew though that linear wasn’t working and spontaneity seemed to be 
coming naturally.
Janeway felt almost lost, it was taking her an age to work the controls at 
tactical ops.  It was a while since she’d done this.  “6 photon torpedoes, only 
aft phasers are operational.”
“Shields?”  Naomi smiled at the uncertainty in Janeway’s voice.  She 
enjoyed feeling totally in control.
“16% and rising,” Janeway said, trying to make her voice sound more 
commanding, even though she knew that now was not the time for mind 
games.
“Okay, there’s not much more you can do.  Grab a med-kit and treat Ensign 
Kim and Commander Tuvok, leave Chakotay he’s just got concussion.”  
She continued to work away busily.
The turbo-lift doors opened and Annika Hansen stepped onto the bridge, a 
whole manner of engineering gadgets in her arms and a reassuringly neutral 
look on her face.  “Captain, astrometrics, the mess hall, hydroponics, stellar 
cartography and the science lab have all been secured.”  She shot a fleeting 
look in Harry’s direction, he was a deathly white but Janeway seemed to be 
doing a good job as temporary nurse.  She regained her composure and 
walked head high to where her Captain was working.
“Start targeting the torpedoes.  I’ve nearly finished reconfiguring sensors to 
detect the mines.  This is going to be a lot of fun.”  Naomi smiled up at 
Annika.
Janeway listened to the conversation from where she was treating Harry, 
she still didn’t trust this woman and didn’t like how the commander referred 
to those areas as secure.  Janeway had just about had enough of being 
ordered around.  She stood up and put hands firmly on hips.  “Would 
someone kindly tell me what is going on.”
“Annika?”  Naomi said, a small amount of annoyance in her voice, Janeway 
was just making things harder.
Annika spoke as she worked at tactical ops.  “In this time line it takes you 
four days to recover from the attack.  You come up with a theory as to what 
has happened and try to go through the minefield again.  That theory is 
wrong and Voyager suffers heavy damage.  After four weeks, the Pretorians 
decide that your ship is just about weak enough for them to take.  You 
successfully fend them off but at a cost of 21 lives over the whole period.”
Janeway eyed her suspiciously.  “What’s your angle here?  What is this 
going to do for you, I doubt you’d risk your timeline for this.”
“When we are returning through this system, 38 members of Voyager’s 
crew are taken prisoner by the Pretorians.  The captain has the knowledge to 
destroy the Pretorians now, thus eliminating the Pretorians in the future and 
stopping the abduction.  That is our angle, Captain Janeway.”  Annika 
didn’t bother to look up.
“You have no idea what you are doing.”  Janeway said malice present in her 
voice.
“That is correct, we have no idea as to how this will affect our future...” 
Annika was cut off by her captain.
“And to be honest, Kathryn we are beyond caring.”  Naomi said calmly.  A 
couple more commands and she’d be there.  When she had finished this 
Naomi had no idea where she’d be.  She wasn’t even sure if she’d be alive 
but she’d have no regrets wherever it was she ended up.  This was the first 
decision in a long while that would save some lives rather than cost some.  
“Ok, that is me finished.  Annika?”
“Two minutes, captain.”  Naomi sprinted from the conn, up to 
communications.  A few minor adjustments here and there and then they 
were set, all ready to go change History, an opportunity Naomi was 
relishing.


7.02pm
“I’m not going to let you do this!”  The doctor said sternly.  “It’s completely 
unethical, you have no way of knowing if B’elanna will survive even if you 
do take this course of action.”
“I trust you to look after her.”  Kathryn said, her hands working on the 
medical instrument.
“There must be other options, a caesarean?”
“That’d kill her.”
“But the baby would survive,”
“Trust me, the baby doesn’t want to survive.”
“This isn’t honourable, doctor.”
“That Klingon thing won’t work with me.  I’m smarter than that.”
“You seem to have already made your decision.”
“Very perceptive doctor.”  They had been arguing in a corner for the last 
two minutes, both too stubborn to let the other win.  “Well we both agree 
that something has to be done soon, or they both die.”
“This is my sickbay.”
“It might be your 15 square metres doctor but it’s my life.  File an official 
complaint if it’ll make you feel better.”
Tom watched the exchange from his position by B’elanna.  He was glad the 
doctor opposed it, so he wouldn’t have to.  As Tom felt B’elanna’s grip on 
his hand lessen and the light fade gently from her eyes, he knew she didn’t 
have long.  Yet, at the same time as accepting the situation he hadn’t the 
energy to plead with his daughter to save her own life.  He hadn’t known 
her very long, but he’d seen traits in her that were recognisable in any 
member of the Paris family.  He supposed he should be proud of her 
courage, marvel at her willingness to save B’elanna’s life but he didn’t want 
to.  Tom didn’t want to lose either of them but he didn’t want to choose.  He 
just wanted to sit there and quietly watch B’elanna, taking reassurance in 
every slight rise and fall in her chest, feeling her skin on his, the way peace 
was returning to her face.  Maybe he should have been fighting for her life, 
making her take every new breath, screaming at the doctor to do something 
but Tom felt right just standing and watching.
“I won’t stand by and watch.  Computer deactivate Emergency Medical 
Hologram.”  Kathryn sighed as the doctor disappeared from view.
“Computer activate Emergency Medical Hologram.”  The doctor re-
appeared
“What?”  The doctor asked angrily of Kathryn, he had grown to dislike this 
stubborn young woman.  She said nothing and pointed at Tom Paris who 
was standing in front of them.
“There are other people who need your help.”  He said quietly but sternly, a 
measure of decorum in his voice that the doctor did not like in him 
considering the situation.  The doctor had no reply.   Tom Paris was right, 
he turned slowly and picked up a med kit, shrugging he quickly moved 
away and resolved not to turn around until she’d gone.
Tom returned his gaze to B’elanna and walked over to her side.  Kathryn 
didn’t like this, she didn’t like the lack of hope in his eyes, he’d given up 
and Kathryn hated that.
“You have to listen to me.  In order to get this to work I’m going to need 
your co-operation.”
“I’m not going to help you.”  Tom surprised himself this time by the 
amount of passion in his voice.
“Well you’re going to have to if you want at least one of us alive by the 
end.”  She looked away and began to prepare the instruments, wondering if 
she’d feel pain when the baby did.
“The baby is healthy?”  Tom asked, never more sure of a decision in his 
life.
“Relatively, but that’s not the issue here.”  Kathryn was growing more and 
more annoyed.
“I’m not going to let you do this.”  Tom felt all his apathy drain away.
“I just wish for once in my life that people would stop interfering.”  Kathryn 
said, her face flushed and her body language aggressive.
“This isn’t just about your life, it’s about mine as well.  I’m not letting you 
do this.”
“For God’s sake, I’ve made a decision and you’re just going to have to deal 
with it.”  Kathryn didn’t like the way he was making her doubt her decision.  
She didn’t know what she had expected, she’d been told what had happened 
the first time around.  Her father had been adamant; B’elanna would have 
wanted it this way he’d said, she’d just thought that meeting her he’d know 
not to bother.  She was a disaster, she’d shown them that, why would he 
want to save her?
“This is ridiculous.  Stop acting like this is all for the best.  So you’ve had a 
tough life, who hasn’t?  This isn’t noble, this isn’t courageous this is just 
you running away from your problems under some fake blaze of glory.  
Whatever has happened in your life it was still a life worth living.”
“Oh great philosophy Dad, care to visit us in the real world?”  She began 
the procedure, lowering a hypospray to B’elanna’s neck.  Tom reached out a 
hand to stop her.  He didn’t know why, he had no speech prepared but he 
knew, deep down in that place that he often ignored that this just wasn’t 
right.  He saw too much of himself in those now strangely alive eyes.  Too 
much confusion of duty with common sense, he’d been like that once, he’d 
grown up.  Everything happened for a reason.
“Listen to me, this isn’t going to happen.  I can’t...” Tom fell backwards as 
the phaser blast hit him, anger almost kept him awake, almost.

7.11pm
 “One quarter impulse,” Naomi said, as she slowly brought Voyager to life.  
She’d always wanted to be chief conn officer, it was what she was trained to 
do.  Her position as captain had always seemed somehow forced, an 
assumption made by others.  It was never her choice.
Annika nodded and began to work away at the engineering station.  She cast 
another look at Harry.  Janeway had moved on now, she was treating Tuvok 
at tactical.  In her time, Annika knew that Harry survived but what would 
happen when they changed everything?  He would just become another life 
on her conscience.  She thought about Kate.  She wondered what was going 
on in sickbay.  She didn't want to ask the captain, she seemed too engulfed 
in her work.  Annika noticed the smiles dart across Naomi’s face whenever 
they avoided a mine, an insignificant victory but it appeared that any victory 
was important to Naomi.  But Annika couldn’t shake it.  It was a strange 
sensation, a discomforting feeling of, she couldn’t place it, loss?  A feeling 
that Annika would normally be able to cope with, stored away, another side 
effect, but somehow she felt that this irrational fear was well founded.  It 
was all about trusting her instincts, but often they had let her down.  She 
realised her hands had stopped working as her mind had wandered.  She 
returned to the task at hand.
If Janeway was ten years younger and didn’t have a very sick Vulcan to 
take care of she’d be up there, wrestling that presumptuous woman from her 
seat at the conn.  Still, the malfunctioning medical tri-corder bore the brunt 
as it was flung onto the floor.  Tuvok’s pulse was strong, a head wound just 
above an eyebrow his lips in the slight grimace of pain.  Kim had been 
badly injured but she was confident he’d pull through, it was mostly a flesh 
wound, mostly.  The conn officer had been killed but Naomi was right, 
Chakotay just had a concussion.  That hadn’t stopped her checking for 
internal bleeding all of three times. Janeway told herself it was because the 
equipment was faulty, she knew that wasn’t the real reason.
“Cloaked Pretorian cruiser on long range sensors.”  Naomi said, her voice 
slightly calmer now.
“Cloaked?”  Janeway asked standing up.
“Going to three quarter impulse.”  Naomi had ignored Janeway.  The bridge 
fell quiet, it was a troubling silence for Janeway.  She didn’t know why 
she’d allowed any of this.  Janeway had been on edge for the past two days, 
her suspicious nature had asserted itself.
“Is there anything I can do?”  Janeway was changing tactics now, a less 
belligerent approach would work better perhaps.
“Full impulse,” Naomi smiled to herself.  It was unlike her to be so rude.  If 
it had been anyone except Janeway, she may have been more considerate, 
but Naomi was enjoying this Kindergarten taunt.
“Commander,” Janeway felt she’d have more luck with someone who 
didn’t seem to be holding a grudge.  “Do you need anybody to be at tactical 
ops?  Communications?”
“No.”  Annika replied, trying not to let her concentration lapse.  She was 
trying to remember a particularly tricky engineering trick.
Undeterred Janeway stationed herself at tactical ops and had to stop herself 
from gasping as she looked down the fatality list that was being displayed 
prominently.  Beside it lay the damage report.  Voyager was in worse shape 
than Janeway had realised.  Janeway memorised the names, another nine to 
add to her list, four in engineering, four from some corridor on deck 4, a 
security team and the ensign at the conn.  A light flashed, it looked as 
though all six remaining torpedoes were armed and ready for deployment, 
all had been targeted on an M class planet, population 12 million.
“What the hell do you think you are doing?”  Janeway shouted.
“We are through the field, shields?”  Naomi said triumphantly but still 
ignoring Janeway.  This time it was because she didn’t like the way she 
couldn’t defend her decision.  Janeway would be able to pick it apart easily.
“78%” Annika replied.  “We are not going to kill anybody Captain, if this 
works...” Annika was speaking directly to Janeway now, she disliked this 
plan as much but loyalty had always been important to Annika, she’d been 
loyal to Janeway once.  Still, if Naomi’s plan, or what Annika understood of 
it after a rushed 3 minute briefing in the shuttle bay, worked no-one on the 
planet would be killed, but it was a large if.
“Errr,” Chakotay stirred and began to open his eyes. They opened just long 
enough for him to see the Pretorian cruiser de-cloaking off the port-bow and 
then he slipped back into his subconscious.  Janeway witnessed this, and as 
she braced for impact, realised that he had the right idea.
*************************************************************
************** 
7.14pm
“Right that is it, I will not have weapons being fired in my sickbay.  Give 
that here.”  The doctor snatched the phaser away.  He grumbled to himself 
as he returned to his patient.  Ensign Paris was fine, light phaser burns to his 
chest and neck, a nasty bruise on his head.
Connie Parsons stood almost paralysed to the spot as the weapon in her 
hands was snatched away from her.  Oh good one Connie, her mind 
chastised, shot senior officer without just cause or provocation that’s 
definitely one for the permanent record.  Connie considered this, exactly 
why had she shot Ensign Paris?  Obviously she had her reasons and they 
had seemed very clear at the time, now though it was hard to see any point 
in her course of action, any point at all.
“Hey,” was the only response she got from Kathryn as she busily began to 
run scans of all kinds on her mother.
“That’s her way of saying thanks, I think.”  Steven T’jour hobbled over to 
Connie and smiled at her, she could do nothing but return the sentiment.  
“Why’d you do it?”
“Why is she?”  Connie nodded to Kathryn.  This young doctor’s actions had 
seemed noble before, but it was becoming clearer to Connie why she’d shot 
Tom and it had little to do with him.
“Kathryn’s screwed up.”  He said, moving his gaze to Kathryn and noticing 
that her eyes had regained their usual harshness.
“I thought you were meant to be her friend.”  She lowered her head. 
“She’s stubborn, what can I say?”
“More than you are.”  With that the diminutive frame of Connie Parsons left 
Sickbay, her head still reeling, a bad taste in her mouth.

7.18pm
“We are within range.”  Sparks flew.  
“Fire.”  Came the reply.  “The cruisers will return to base as soon as they 
see what we have done.”  
The ship lurched again. Janeway increased the level of pressure her hands 
were exerting on the now sticky metal of the ops station.
“Shields at 38%” Annika had to shout this time, the noise from the gushing 
conduit was almost deafening.  “Firing torpedoes.”
   
7.19pm
The room rocked and Kathryn almost dropped the hypospray she held in her 
hands as she lost her footing.  She promptly regained it and stared at the 
blue vile that she was about to inject.  This certainly was a novel way to bid 
au revoir to existence.  In three minutes it would be in her blood stream, the 
right mix of hormones to make B’elanna’s body reject the foetus, to give 
her enough strength to live.  She’d prepared everything, done every possible 
scan, prepared for any eventuality.  She’d made her decision, she had to 
stand by it, had to.  She lowered her hand, not knowing whether it was pride 
or compulsion that kept it moving slowly down towards her mother’s neck.  
A last breath, purposefully slow and she quickly pressed the nozzle to her 
mother’s neck.  An afterthought and she pulled her hand away quickly, 
realising what she had done, regret and fear took control.  It was too late.  
Three minutes, she had three minutes.  For once in her life, it wasn’t enough 
time.    

7.20pm
“They know what we’re doing, four ships have broken formation to destroy 
the torpedoes.”  Annika shouted.
“Options?”  It wasn’t meant to happen this way.
“We only have aft phasers.”
“Shields?”
“21% and falling.”
Janeway felt like making a snide remark.  Instead she worked on tactical 
ops, she didn’t have time to gloat.
“Torpedoes 1, 2 and 6 have been destroyed but three ships have taken heavy 
damage.”
“Oh, anti-matter gotta love it.”  Naomi shouted, pulling a tangled piece of 
hair behind her ear.  She still felt strangely in control, she knew their 
weaknesses more than they knew their own.  She liked her chances.
“Torpedo 3 has been destroyed.  2 minutes 20 seconds until 4 and 5 enter 
the atmosphere.”

Sickbay 7.22pm

“I assume you’ve done it then.”
“All I have to do now is wait.”

7.22pm
Voyager lurched again, smoke was slowly filling the bridge.  Janeway’s 
hands were red from holding on.
“Shields at 12% and holding for now.  Wait, 11%, 10%.  45 seconds until 
torpedo entry, Pretorian cruiser still pursuing.”
A silence.
“Torpedo 4 has been destroyed.  Shields at 8%”
The bridge was silent again.

7.23pm
“Status?”  The EMH asked.  He thought it would have been quicker
“Any second now.”  She hoped it was any second now, she couldn’t bear 
any-more waiting.
He turned his back and he didn’t see her fall gracefully to the floor.  In fact 
no-one did, no-one turned, looked at her, offered help.  It took her a second 
to realise what was happening and in that second she was gone


7.24pm 
“Torpedo 5 has entered the atmosphere, it is on target.”
Janeway felt like screaming as silence descended again.
“Direct hit,” Annika’s words echoed strangely, never reaching any ears.  
Full impulse was the last command Naomi punched in.

7.25pm
 Janeway shook the strange feeling that hung over her.  She couldn’t 
remember the last 20 minutes; in fact the last two days were a little hazy.  
Surreptitiously she raised a hand to her head.  A trickle of blood from a 
bruise on the side of her head was warm and sticky against her fingers.  
Temporary amnesia it seemed had claimed her.  She was at tactical ops.  
Why was she at tactical ops?
“Computer, heading.”  Her throat was dry, her voice a little croaky.
“We are currently heading at full impulse away from the Pretori system.”
“Describe Voyager’s actions over the last 20 minutes.”  The computer had 
to know.
“The data retrieval system is malfunctioning, the last 20 minutes of 
telemetry has been lost.”
“Can we go to warp?”  Wherever they were Janeway didn’t want to be there 
any longer.
“Warp engines are currently off-line.”
 Janeway was soon at the conn and guiding a crippled Voyager gently away.

7.26pm
“Activate Emergency Medical Hologram.”  The doctor appeared in sickbay, 
a slightly bemused look on his face.  He was confronted with Tom Paris, 
hand on a low rib, calm look on his face.
“B’elanna’s lost the baby but she should come out okay.”  He looked down.  
“Can you do a brain scan, I can’t remember the last 20 minutes and even 
yesterday is patchy.  I obviously took a knock but I can’t remember a 
thing.”
“Why wasn’t I activated earlier?”
Tom shrugged and went back to B’elanna.

October 27th 2377
“How are my two favourite patients fairing today?”  Tom entered sickbay a 
smile from ear to ear.  B’elanna wanted to hit him as soon as she saw him 
but held back for Harry’s sake.  She didn’t need smiley Tom Paris right 
now, she needed the real Tom Paris, he had to be hurting too, he had to be.
Tom put his bouquet of flowers down on a side table and went to give 
B’elanna a chaste peck on the cheek before he turned to Harry.
“Hey Harry, how you doing?”  Tom smiled broadly again.
“Bored, I am so bored.  Bored and confused.  I want to know what I was 
doing for those two days when the whole ship seems to have been out of it.”  
Harry had been feeling strangely content since he woke up the day before.  
Strange seeing as he’d been lying in sickbay, quite badly injured.
“Apparently it was ship-wide temporary amnesia.  No-one has a clue what 
they were doing, not even the Captain.”  Tom smiled broadly again, too 
broadly.  It wasn’t a very well constructed wall, his ‘I’m happy’ wall, he 
hadn’t the energy.  He had to talk to B’elanna, they had a lot of decisions to 
make.

2403 Taspak colony
“What are you doing way out here?” Thania asked.  She’d been looking for 
Lauren for a good two hours now.
“Thinking.”  Lauren replied, surveying the view before her.
“About...” Thania prompted.
“Voyager.”
“Ancient history.”
“I miss her.”
“She was a flying death-trap.  We’re happier here, safer.  You’ll settle 
down.”
“I’m 21 tomorrow.”
“Your present is wrapped and waiting.”
“Did you know my mother had a miscarriage.”
“Yes.”
“Wonder what she’d have been like, the baby I mean, it was a girl.”
“This isn’t getting us anywhere.”  Thania turned to leave, she hated Lauren 
when she wallowed.  She began to walk down the hill
“Wait, I’m coming.” Lauren went after her.
“Tell me about my surprise party.”
“Shall we call it a party, seeing as it is no longer a surprise?”
“Steve told me.”  She said with a girly giggle
“Well your Dad has got Neelix to do a great spread and your Mum is 
apparently working on some kind of fire-work display.  Your Uncle Tom as 
always is manning the drinks.  Should be a blast!”  Thania put an arm 
around her friend.  At that Lauren Torres-Kim snapped out of her rut and 
began talking excitedly about the dress she was going to wear.

Finis

OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What have I done?
Loved it Loathed it – tell me kat_hughes@talk21.com – Me like mail!!!!
Another disclaimer (just in case like) Paramount owns ‘Star Trek’ and ‘Star 
Trek Voyager’ and all related characters.  I am doing this for fun not 
profit!!!!!!!!!!!