My Story
This page is my story to date. I do have a habit of being rather long-winded, so unless you are truly interested in hearing my story (and have some time to spare), I'd save this page for later. Some of the information in this page can be somewhat graphic, so unless you know what living with this is like, I'd suggest that you don't read this unless you have a strong stomach and a mature outlook on medical conditions. Although I was only diagnosed on August 11, 1999, I have been suffering with the symptoms of PCOS since the onset of puberty. I didn't know what was wrong with me. I was a normal sized child, and I began to put on weight almost immediately after my periods began. I was only 9 years old, and was wearing a B-cup! My periods were never on time, and very scanty to begin with. As I grew older, I saw several Gyn's who all told me the same thing-
"Lose weight and you'll be fine. This is normal." There were other Gyn's that told me that I shouldn't worry about not having my period, that there would be no adverse affects to my body. As my favorite tv personality, Judge Judy, would put it, "BALONEY!!!"As the weight piled on, my depression got worse. I refused to change in the gym at school. Other kids made fun of me, and I was the butt of many jokes. I was lucky to have the few friends that I did have. (Stephen, I still love ya, honey!) I would go months, sometimes up to 10 at a time, without having a period, but suffering with PMS symptoms. When I did have bleeding, it was very scanty and would only last for 2 or 3 days. I began to get serious
headaches. I attributed them to the fact that I have poor vision and overwork my eyes on a daily basis. My heart would occasionally flutter, winding me, and that would be chalked up to the fact that I was quite obese, and that weight loss would be the only cure for that.I tried all the low-fat diets, I even joined a certain weight-loss program (name withheld to protect the guilty) where I would line up each week, like so much cattle for the slaughter, and wince when I was still gaining a few pounds each week. I was an embarrassment to myself and some members of my family. Being a woman from "The South" (think Gone With the Wind), women are supposed to be sleek and hairless, trim and always beautiful. There I was, a cow in the midst of a beauty pagent. It really hurt to look at myself in the mirror. I went into the "wear only black" stage-- (a comedienne once said, " A fat woman wearing all black is like a small boy who covers his eyes
and says,'I'm INVISIBLE!!!'")In the midst of all this blubber (as if that wasn't enough!), I began to grow quite a lovely moustache and exquistely long, black hairs all over my body (tummy, neck, face, legs, you name it!) I waxed, I plucked, I shaved, and it
would all come back within a day or two. An additional daily battle that I didn't want to deal with.Deeper in depression than ever before, some of my beloved family members started to offer me money to lose weight. Insult to injury, I know, but their hearts were in the right place. (Get me in the wallet, I'm always broke!) And I tried desperately to please them. I'd starve myself, only to binge later at their houses, when fried chicken, mashed potatoes, yummy black eyed peas, and strawberry bucket cake lingered in the kitchen. Always the same conversation, "You need to lose weight, Sherrie. Here, have some more cake." UGH! How do you win?
My mother watched the segment on PCOS on Dateline. She called me the next day, and told me to get on the internet and find out what PCOS meant. I sat up for 14 hours on my PC and read until my eyes hurt. The more information I read, the more I realized- I MIGHT HAVE AN ANSWER HERE! I couldn't get in to see a specialist, so I went to Planned Parenthood. They did a normal checkup, and according to them everything was normal, although
they did recommend I do some bloodwork to determine if I was a candidate for PCOS. Without insurance, I knew I couldn't afford it. They gave me an Rx for Ortho Tri-Cyclen. I had some breakthrough bleeding in June, so I started
taking the pills that Sunday. In two weeks, on June 18th, my body exploded. I began having severe cramps that made it impossible for me to move, much less get out of bed. My husband drove me to the Emergency Room, where they did another exam, gave me a brush off diagnosis of "dysfunctional uterine bleeding" and sent me home. I coped with the bleeding the best I could, under the circumstances. I continued to work as much as possible at a job that I had no energy to perform simply because I needed to become eligible for the company insurance plan. I didn't stop bleeding until July 30th. The day that I received my insurance card, I made appointments with a Gyn specialist. The doctor was on vacation, but I explained my situation and symptoms to the
receptionist. She called the doctor, spoke with him, and got back to me on the very next day, with instructions for my care until I was able to see him. I was overjoyed! I had gotten more information and care from a receptionist
than all of my previous Gyn's combined!I had my initial exam on August 5, 1999. The doctor spoke with me immediately, and was very kind to my situation. We went through the basics (blood pressure, weight, etc.) He asked me if I had been taking birth control, and I told him that I stopped the Ortho treatment immediately after the hemmoraghing. He told me that the pills weren't the right dosage for my body, and prescribed Tri-Norinyl (which I had taken when I was in my early teens, and had no side effects). He attempted a endometrial biopsy, which failed because my cervix was swollen shut. We scheduled an ultrasound for the next week.
On August 11, 1999, I went in for my ultrasound. They did an external and internal scan, measuring the size of my endometrial lining and ovaries. The whole process took about 30 minutes, and I experienced no pain whatsoever.
I was asked to wait in the lobby while the doctor and the technician went over the data. In about ten minutes, the doctor invited me into his office. He had asked me if I knew what Stein-Levinthal Syndrome was. I almost started
crying. He nailed right away what my body had been telling me all along! He gave me even more information to read about PCOS, and recommended that I start a low-carb diet to help me with the weight loss. My blood pressure is elevated to an avarage of 150/104, due to the hormonal effects on my heart. My mood swings and headaches are all due to an insulin resistance, which I have found to be prevailent among women with this endocrine disorder.I learn more about this disease and more about myself every day that I deal with this. My husband and I deal with my volatile mood swings, often causing arguements that lead to tears. My libido is zilch, and my hubby gets
frustrated every time I have to tell him no. I think I will never understand how he is so patient with me. I have cramps throughout the day for no reason. I am a lethargic puddle of nerves, and every time I see a commercial
with a baby I burst into tears, with the fear that we may not be able to have children of our own. But, we cope and we pray for understanding and patience. And, someday, maybe we'll be praying for our children...I'd like to keep you all updated on the experiments I do on myself with regards to herbs and exercises, in the hopes that perhaps it could help someone else. I have gathered so much information from all the cysters on the net, that I wanted to give something back to them.
"It is not true that life is one damn thing after another it's the same damn thing over and over."
- Edna St. Vincent Milay
You are visitor #
since August 18, 1999.
FastCounter by LinkExchange
PCOS / Symptoms / Diagnosing / Links / My Story / My Journal / Email / Guestbook
Created 8/18/99 by SherBear. This page was created as a personal account of one woman's PCOS as it affects her daily life. I am NOT a medical professional. Any information on this site cannot replace a diagnosis from a trained medical professional. Do not use this as a form of self-diagnosis. I will not be held responsible for the acts of others. I know I'm long winded.
Thanks for making it this far! :-)
Background image provided by:
