My Interview With Britney Spears...(And She Actually Said Every Word Of It...)

Yes, ladies and gents. The day you've waited for. I called Ms. Spears and got a personal interview with her..Not. You know how I did this??? I took Britney quotes that made her sound really stupid and added in my questions and comments. It's really that simple. Props to MTV for the quotes.

Caitlin: Hi, Britney!

Britney: Yeah...

Caitlin: It's such...such...an honor to be interviewing you...*shivers*

Britney: I know, it's so exciting!

Caitlin: Um...sure, first question: Are those boobs real? Don't lie!

Britney: My morals are really, you know, strong and I have major beliefs about certain things and I think that has helped me, you know, from being, you know coming from a really small town.

Caitlin: You didn't answer my question.

Britney: Yeah!

Caitlin: Answer my fucking question!

***Brit looks off into space...I sigh, and continue on. ***

Caitlin: So, tell me Brit, how is it fucking Justin Timberlake, I'm sure millions of ...*shivers* teenyboppers out there want to know...

Britney: No, it's not true.

Caitlin: What?

Britney: Just big brothers to me...

Caitlin: Well, you seem to just want to keep it in the family, you know, you and Chad.

Britney: Yeah.

Britney: I just see my bed and I get to sleep in my bed, you know, I love my bed and my fan.

Caitlin: What the hell are you talking about? Your bed? I bet you have to buy a new one every month just to keep up with the wear of your, ahem, nightlife...

Britney: I'm such a clean nut.

Caitlin: Yes, you are a nut. Clean, too? Oh, you wash the sheets, thank god...

Britney: I'm just young and I want to have fun now.

Caitlin: Really, I didn't know your idea of fun was getting multiple STD's.

Caitlin: How did you start singing anyways?

Britney: You know, with the hairspray, in front of the mirror.

Caitlin: Britney, I believe that would be a BRUSH, moron....

Britney begins to babble away...Caitlin gets exasperated and leaves.

More coming soon.